Duff Man

The Moomins is the creepiest thing you will ever watch, especially when stoned. Pure animated evil.

It would seem so judging by the amount of shit behind the washer. Anyone know how much it costs to get the exterminators in?

For the last month or so I've been sharing my modest abode with countless furry little fuckers who have taken it upon themselves to eat any uncovered food I leave lying around and then shit all over the place without so much as a thankyou. Now ususally I'm against cruelty to animals but this was just plain rude so I decided that action must be taken. I'd put down some poison and a few cheapo traps but they had been about as successful as the pop career of that fat bitch from Pop Idol. I had noted, however, that they were particularly fond of Kellogs Crunchy Nut Corn Flakes. With this in mind I thought it may be a good idea to leave an open box out at all times in the hope that I would one day catch the buggers red handed. You can imagine my delight then, when I resturned home from work yesterday and found two of the bastards in the box filling their furry little faces. Now I'm not going to go into details but lets just say that after a frantic few mintues in the kitchen involving the mice, my foot and a binliner, the rodent motherfuckers are no more. Result!

That's the best picture I've ever seen, anywhere.

Some of the dross that is put out by the beeb is fucking embarassing to be fair. How the fuck 'Two Pints of Lager and blah blah...' managed to get to a 4th series is unbelievable. Especially when you compare it to some of the stuff that was on just a few years back. i.e The Fast Show which pisses all over Little Britain imo and Alan Partridge which was also very good. Mark Lamarr and Reeves & Mortimmer also did some good stuff - Shooting Stars, Buzzcocks etc.

Fucking class film is Oldboy, so much better than the predictable, generic shite churned out by Hollywood.

Shite acting, tedious storyline and a gay robot - Star Wars is wank, FACT.

"Fill my little world right up, right up, riiiiiiiight up.....'. Err no, fuck off you shit bastards.

Why the fuck didn't the bird try running to the toilet? or at least try positioning her dirty arse over the carpet. Can't believe she just knelt there and shat all over the couch. Lazy cow! Conclusion, wrong animal put down.

I am, not coz of a night on the booze for once though. Played in 5-a-side footy tournament yesterday for the work team, don't know why I bothered really. It just served as reminder that I am both hugely unfit and shite at football. I got to kick my tosspiece of a boss though so it wasn't all bad.

Steve Coppell and O'Neill for me. Both seem honest and fair, don't get the usual "no I didn't see my player break his nose with a flying dropkick, even though it did happen 3 yards away from me" bollcoks that you hear from other managers. Hate all the usual suspects such as Moreen and Whisky Nose, but also Glenn Roeder, is there a more boring person in football, or anywhere for that matter?

7 Stellas - Peggie 10 Stellas - Pat 15 Stellas - Dot Sonya - No fucking chance!

Schlangers (tits)

Boff

Hasn't Duff just moved so he could play more?

Turnips, Swede and Parsnips - so very wrong. Destroy them all!

Oh great, another autobiography from a young premiership footballer. I know it's Gerrard and it'll be slightly more interesting than the others but it still just smacks of greed to me.

Good read, however, no man should ever refer to another man as a 'stud'. Ever.

Remembered it being a great film until me and my mates got it out about a year ago and found it to be totally unscary, totally shit, and a totally unecessary 3 hours fucking long.

I feel your pain, however, I have found that turning the packet upside down whislt still unopened and shaking vigorously can, although never giving a perfect sultana/flake mix, go some way to resolving the issue.

Not even worth 10m based on what I saw in the World Cup. Hugely overrated.

I remember a badger called badger who had a friend called bodger who kept badger as a lodger and made him suck his todger in return for mashed potatoe. Not that thats got anything to do with the question at hand though. Erm, can't decide really it's quite a tough one, is the otter related to that twat who rides a broomstick?

My old dear cries for about half an hour whenever she sees that scene, mind you she also cried when we were watching Bob The Builder Christmas Special so perhaps she's just depressed? Fuck knows, if my undies stop getting cleaned and the tea stops appearing on the table I may investigate further.

Back To The Future Part I. Pretty much all the bits with Christopher Lloyd in. e.g... His face when the model car sets on fire. Also the unforgettable "Great Scott Marty....one point twenty one Jiggerwatts" Class, brilliant bit of casting.