Evelyn Tentions

Bonus points if it takes out Murdoch or the other arseholes on Jaizinhos hit list

250 million. Plus Ramos' testicles, to be removed without anaesthetics in front of the Kop

IQ test?

Bloody hell Redder. You're supposed to respond to that by negging it and filling the next 4 pages with hate filled diatribe. Not by showing a sense of humour and repping it.

The older you get, the higher the death rate. A higher percentage of 80 year olds croak than 40 year olds BUT there are a lot more 40 year olds knocking around than 80 year olds

If they delay the resumption of the Season until the worst of the virus affects have passed, it is more than likely going to be June or July at the earliest before the season finishes. It's a simple matter to change the transfer window to suit but what about all of those players whose contracts are finished in June?

NZ has joined the list of places requiring new arrivals to self isolate. How are people supposed to get from wherever they arrive to their chosen isolation place?

Fix yourselves up with these, you don't need bog rolls unless you use them instead of tissues for sneezes (cheapskates) . Cheap and easy to fit yourself (hint, remember to turn the water off first). Far more hygienic.

So it's not all bad then.

Fuckers will either turn man-eater or cannibal

Actor. The Good, The Bad & The Ugly Unforgiven Dirty Harry Play Misty For Me City Heat Director Play Misty For Me Outlaw Josey Wales Unforgiven High Plains Drifter Mystic River

The Tory party

Dirty little twat Costa should have been given a yellow for throwing the ball away after that offside.

Do you work for Snow White?

Great author. Also done a lot of TV work, he wrote Foyles War and has done scripts for Poirot.

I'm half minded to suggest we put our squad in quarantine at Mewood and play the under 12s who are more likely to shrug it off quickly. Allowing fucking thousands of Typhoid Marios in at this stage is fucking stupid. The League is way more important, the only important thing about the CL is stopping the Clampetts

It's some rich bitch who'd been to fashion shows in Milan but lied about having been in Italy when she boarded the plane in London, having already noticed symptoms. A shit load of tourists now infected, and spread over the country. Most places are in lock down, the number of cases went from 16 since the start to over 30 positive. if and when she recovers, I hope the government jail the bitch for years. On the positive side, most people have bum guns. This is a supermarket in Danang yesterday.

Vietnam had no cases for a few weeks, done a remarkable job of limiting the spread. Then a Vietnamese woman who'd been in Italy flew back, infected half the plane load who are all now all over Vn and its full scale panic time. She flew from London so its probably all over the UK now as well.

The late great James Garner

There is a social stigma with brown skin in Vn, pale skin is considered much more beautiful. Head to toe coverage is common, even (or especially) at the beach. They wear socks with a separate big toe toe for their flip flops and just plonk a crash helmet on top of their burqa-like hat. Vietnamese females consequently have one of the world's highest rates of Vitamin D deficiency in the world. This lady runs a cafe serving beach chairs at Hoian and spends the (blazing hot) days like this!

Fucking hell Trumo. I had to write that one down and then try to remember my Spanish. Thank fuck there's no Greeks left for the next round.

So much for the LiVARpool twats now

Top 5 time Tony? One for movies he starred in, one for movies he directed.

Anti vaxxers (or to use the technical term, fuckwits) are apparently spamming pollies in the Australian state of Victoria complaining about frontline health workers receiving mandatory vaccinations. "Martin Pakula (@MartinPakulaMP) As a side bar, it’s interesting that even in the midst of #covid19 & the global efforts to create a vaccine, Victorian state politicians are still getting spammed, daily, by dozens of emails from anti vaxxers objecting to mandatory vaccination of frontline health workers. Bizarre" I hope they've all stocked up on violet oil.