Dr Nowt

Not only did that escalate quickly, but I made a total and utter fucking arse of posting it!

€115M offer from the Reds for Moisés Caicedo. He would become the most expensive signing in Liverpool history. The Ecuadorian is in London and the most recent reports indicate that he has changed his position and will accept Liverpool's proposal. Yours faithfully, John Henry

What could possibly go wrong with this latest development?

Loving this. “A willingness to discuss a fee and agree a deal if it’s there to be done”. At around half of what the selling club actually want.

Those long winter nights just whistle by.

A contract season from Thiago would be extremely well-timed.

What ‘Being: Liverpool’ really lacked was bonus content of Dossier Man’s former wife watching it and commentating on bits like that, Gogglebox-style. Box office.

More realistically… Jorg Schmadtke: How am I doing boss? Rick Parry: Ian Ayre:

Jorg Schmadtke: How am I doing boss? Rick Parry and Ian Ayre: You’re doing a great job son. A great job

That’s what happens when you let Conor Benn cook you an omelette.

Harsh on Trent. Sounds more like they’re rating Naby lad.

“No way, you’ve retired too?”

So Big Jorg did have another 50p hiding in his trouser pocket, after all? Knew it.

£2m in add-ons, by any chance?

Is that really the best you can do? Not sell him for £20M and replace him with a table football rod or bring back Bobby Duncan in his position or promote someone in-utero? Talk about law of diminishing returns.

Daisy has recorded his transfer window recap ahead of time, like media outlets do obituaries for heads of state and ageing legends.

Show some compassion for the man, Kevin. He’s shocked and devastated.

Keep thinking of The Ox’s smile when he wheels himself back in on Deadline Day and it makes me realise I don’t begrudge John Henry buying a new yacht just so it matches the underwear set he bought his missus for Xmas.