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    Dave Usher
    reports from
    Anfield
     
     
    So that's that then.  737 games, 17 seasons as a first team player and countless clean sheets.  Somewhat fitting then that he finished by helping the side pitch another shut out, it's just a pity that he couldn't end his Anfield career the way he started it all those years ago - with a goal at the Kop end.  He came mighty close though didn't he?  
     
    We were within a couple of inches of one of the greatest moments our historic stadium has ever witnessed.  If that 30 yard rocket had found the net instead of the post, Carragher would have just walked off the field there and then.  What a way to go that would have been, I actually feel more than a little bit cheated that the goalpost robbed us of what would have been such an incredible moment.
     
    Much like this entire season, it was a case of so near yet so far.  We've been tantalisingly close to being good, but there's still work to be done and that work has become much harder now that we have to replace the irreplaceable.  If our scouts are worthy of their lofty reputations then they should be able to replace Jamie Carragher the centre back, but you simply can't replace Jamie Carragher the man, the leader, the legend.  That's just one of a number of problems they need to help Brendan Rodgers solve this summer.
     
    We played some terrific football again in this game, yet in the end we were a little bit uncomfortable having somehow only managed to score one goal against a truly awful and completely disinterested QPR side.  Actually that's a little unfair, I thought their defenders put a real shift in and produced some great last ditch clearances to keep them in the game, but the lack of quality (and interest) ahead of them meant they were somewhat overworked.
     
    Rob Green in their goal made a string of saves (none of them too taxing in fairness), whilst we were also perhaps the final Premier League victims of the absence of goal-line technology, as Coutinho was denied an early goal due to the officials not seeing that his header had clearly crossed the line.  From next season, that won't be happening, or at least it shouldn't.  Thankfully it didn't cost us and nor did it happen in a game of any real meaning.  
     
    This game was just about getting Carra a win to send him into a well earned retirement, and whilst a win and a clean sheet is a more than satisfactory outcome as far as the man himself is concerned, this really should have been a much more convincing scoreline than 1-0.
     
    I was delighted to see Rodgers hand a debut to Jordan Ibe.  On a day that was all about paying tribute to an elder statesman playing his final game, seeing a precocious 17 year old handed an opportunity to show what he can do added a nice sense of balance to the occasion.  One was at the end of his journey, the other at the beginning.  Both acquitted themselves excellently on the day, and if Ibe goes on to do even half of what Carragher has done then I'm sure he too will retire a very happy man.  Highly unlikely he'll do it as a Liverpool player though, very few have done that.
     
    Further hope for the future was provided in the form of the impish Coutinho, who was terrific again and will hopefully keep us on the edge of our seats for many years to come.  He's a special talent, and he's far exceeded everybody's expectations in the short space of time he's been here.  I think that's fair to say, I can't imagine even his biggest fan expected him to be THIS good.
     
    In terms of both goals and assists, he's made a big, big impact.  I generally feel that when you get a player in January, you're playing with house money until May.  By that I mean you're giving them a few months to bed in and give themselves a head start in terms of the following season.  When other clubs are bedding in new signings, if you've got someone who's had a few months to get used to it you're laughing.
     
    Like Suarez before him, this is Coutinho's bedding in period, the time when he learns to adjust to English football to get himself ready for a full season next year.  Like I say, we've been playing with house money the last few months, and we've been winning as if this is how he plays when he's adapting to the Premier League, what's he going to be like when he's fully adjusted?
     
    He made a great start to this game, he was involved in absolutely everything and could have had a hat-trick before half time.  As a team we made a really bright opening to the game, with Johnson operating almost as a right winger at times as we took it to QPR from the first whistle.  Coutinho's first chance came when nice play between Henderson and Johnson set him up, only for Onuoha to make a great block to divert the ball behind.
     
    From that corner the little Brazilian was left unmarked at the back post and headed goalwards.  It was well over the line when the defender hacked it clear, and Martin Atkinson really should have seen that as he wasn't badly placed.  
     
    Coutinho was dazzling us though, and he almost thread the needle with a trademark through ball to Sturridge that was an inch too far in front of the striker.  No matter, Ibe retrieved the ball, Coutinho went and collected it from before skipping past a defender and seeing his shot deflected just wide of the post.
     
    He wouldn't be denied for long though, drilling in a powerful low shot from 30 yards that skipped off the turf on it's way into the bottom corner of Rob Green's net.  Nice play by Jordan Ibe to get the ball to him as well, that'll go down as his first career assist.  It won't be his last, that kid can play a bit as well.  
     
    At this stage you'd have got long odds indeed on there being no more goals scored, we were running all over QPR and they looked as though they would be swept away by wave after wave of Red attacks.  Even Carragher was threatening their goal, first with an attempted 'hand of God' that would have earned him a booking on any other day, whilst he then had a shot blocked by a hand/arm of a defender from a well worked free kick, but Atkinson - probably rightly - was having none of the vociferous penalty appeals.
     
    For all the pressure we were exerting the second goal didn't come and I felt like we lost some momentum in the 15 minutes or so leading up to half time.  We allowed the tempo to drop and it began to look like what it was, an end of season between two sides with little to play for other than pride.  
     
    After the break we stepped it up again, Enrique stung the palms of Green with a shot from distance, Ibe curled a shot about a foot wide and Downing hit a shot inches past the post after a direct, surging run past two defenders.
     
    Then came THAT moment.  QPR cleared a corner, Lucas headed it back to Carragher who found himself in space 35 yards out.  "SHOOT!!!!" yelled 40,000 Reds.  And shoot he did, probably the sweetest hit he's produced in 17 years.  If that had gone in the roof would have come off the place.  It almost did anyway, it was an incredible moment.  I honestly don't know what I'd have done if it had gone in.
     
    This was a good spell for us and we went close again immediately after when Ibe and Coutinho exchanged passes and the Brazilian raced into the box and tried to pick out Sturridge.  Traore got back to make a fantastic clearance to deny Sturridge a certain goal, and the incoming Henderson couldn't adjust his body shape quickly enough to volley in the rebound.
     
    Ibe was replaced shortly after, but the youngster had made a good impression on the crowd with a lively display full of promise.  For all his attacking ability, his best moment of the game came in a defensive capacity when he chased down Granero as the Spaniard led a dangerous counter attack following a Liverpool corner.
     
    It was a great piece of play that, no-one else was going to make up that ground but the jet heeled Ibe just ate up the turf and blew by Granero before he even knew what was going on.  That earned him a standing ovation, which was repeated when he made way for Borini.
     
    Enrique spent most of the second half camped in the QPR half and it needed a fine save from Green to keep out his thunderous drive after Borini had laid the ball back to him.  Johnson had a deflected shot saved by Green, and Sturridge then wriggled free in the box and drilled the ball across the goal-line looking for Coutinho who would have had a tap in, but again you have to give credit to the QPR defender who got enough of a touch on it to divert the danger.
     
    I almost forgot about a terrific little piece of action that happened when Carra ended up in a sprint with Remy and had to run half the length of the field to try and retrieve the ball without conceding a corner.  He did it, holding off the Frenchman and getting the ball back to Pepe, but he was completely goosed for a minute or two afterwards.  We won a corner almost immediately, and he wanted no part of going forward for it but was railroaded into it by his team-mates, who were all desperate for him to score.  
     
    It was funny though, as rather than make a run into the box to try and attack the ball, he just stood on the edge of the box, doubled over trying to get his breath back!  I can't remember at what stage of the game that happened, the second half was a bit of a blur to be honest and this wasn't shown in the highlights I've watched.  It could have been at the beginning, middle or end of the half for all I know.  It was funny though.
     
    Suso replaced Coutinho with 15 minutes left and got a rare outing in what many of us believe is his best position, the number 10 role.  He settled into the game very quickly and had a shot saved by Green when he maybe could have done a little better.  He also produced some wonderful footwork in a tight space to almost create a goal for Downing, and whilst Coutinho is clearly in a class of his own, in Suso, Sterling and Ibe we've got some very talented youngsters capable of filling the 'three' positions when we play 4231.
     
    With five minutes left Rodgers called time on Carra's magnificent career when he brought him off to a rapturous and emotional reception from all four corners of the ground.  Even the QPR fans stood to applaud him.  Clearly it was a pre-planned substitution, but I've got to be honest I wasn't too happy about it as we were only 1-0 up at the time!
     
    Carra's departure co-incided with QPR suddenly having a little bit of a spell.  I don't want to overstate it as it's not like Reina was overworked, but they did force a corner or two and suddenly we looked a lot less secure than we had been.  That's the big worry, we've looked far better all season when Carragher has been in there.  It's the leadership and talking aspect, it's a huge part of a successful defence and Carra is the only one we have who naturally has that.
     
    Rodgers apparently spoke to Skrtel about it earlier in the season, apparently he asked him to be more of an organiser and a vocal presence, but Skrtel pointed out that he has never done that and it's not who he is.   To be fair you can't force that kind of responsibility on someone, they either have those leadership qualities or they don't, and Skrtel doesn't.  It's not a criticism, it's just a fact.  There are far more players like Skrtel than Carragher in this regard, being able to organise those around and provide leadership is something of a dying art.
     
    We need to fill that void that has now been left with Carragher's retirement, and if there's anything to the rumours about Reina being off then we're in even more trouble as Pepe is another talker and dressing room leader.  There was nothing in any of his actions after the game that suggested he knows he's leaving, it was certainly not like it was with Alonso for example.  
     
    The same with Suarez for that matter, he looked happy enough as he walked around the pitch at full time and he seemed pretty relaxed at Carra's party that night.  I might be clutching at straws, but the fact he showed up to Carra's party has to be a good sign, doesn't it?  I'm probably reading too much into it, I'm just desperate for him to stay as I love the guy.  Imagine losing Carra AND Suarez in the same summer?  Actually don't, it's too depressing.  
     
    You never know what can happen though and this is going to be a really big summer for us, not just in terms of who we bring in, but whether we can keep the players we want to keep.
     
    That's for another day though, this day was all about Jamie Carragher, and aside from that shot not being a couple more inches to the right, the day couldn't have really gone any better for him.  He's handled the whole thing brilliantly from the moment he decided he was calling it quits, he said there'd be no tears as he doesn't get emotional, he even scoffed at Big Sami's tears at his farewell game and said there'd certainly be no repeat of that, and he was true to his word.  A short and sweet speech, a well deserved lap of honour with his two lovely kids in tow, and then he was off down the tunnel for the last time.  
     
    Star man?  I think you already know the answer to that one as it was going to take something pretty incredible for me to give it to anyone else on this day.  I'll end by simply quoting the front cover of the latest issue of the fanzine.  26 years, 737 games, 1 European Cup, 1 UEFA Cup, 2 FA Cups, 3 League Cups….. Ta La.
     
     
    Team:  Reina; Johnson, Skrtel, Carragher (Coates), Enrique; Lucas, Henderson; Downing, Coutinho (Suso), Ibe (Borini); Sturridge:
  • Various press reports suggest that Barcelona are preparing a bid to take Pepe Reina back to the Nou Camp this summer.
     
    Speculation has been mounting about Reina's future for several months, fuelled as far back as January when his father said: 'I am absolutely convinced Pepe would be more than delighted to return to his Barcelona. I would be delighted to see Pepe back at Barca, of course I would. What father would not like to see his son at Barca?"
     
    Now talk has turned to a possible swap deal involving Barca winger Christian Tello, a player who drew serious interest from the Reds last summer before signing a new deal at Camp Nou.  Tello is not a regular in the Catalan's first eleven however and according to reports could choose to leave for pastures new this summer, with Brendan Rodgers one of a host of known admirers.
  • Brendan Rodgers has outlined his aims for next season by stating that he expects the club to be challenging for a top four spot at the very least.
     
    Despite finishing 7th in his first season in charge, Rodgers is encouraged by what he has seen from his squad and expects them to build on some encouraging results and performances since the turn of the year. “In 12 months time I would like to think that we would be challenging for the top four, if not already being in the top four”.
     
    He added: “This club hasn’t played second fiddle in its history, the standards here are as high as anywhere else in the world.”
  • It's been several weeks since the last show and there's a lot to cover. TLW Editor Dave Usher and long time fanzine contributor Stu Montagu join your host 'Numbers' to talk Suarez, Sturridge and Coutinho, and break down the games against Chelsea, Newcastle, Everton and Fulham.  Listen now either on the embedded player below, or by visiting our podcast page here.
     
    You can also subscribe through itunes and have any new podcast automatically delivered to your computer.  Clicking the link above will download the latest episode straight into your itunes, and will subscribe you to any future episodes.
     
    Those of you wanting to listen on your phone, try this link as it should work on most smartphones.
     
    To listen in this window, simply click the play button in the box below.  To listen in a new tab, click here.
     
     
       
         
       
        
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  • So another one bites the dust.  City were obviously feeling a bit left out after all the Ferguson / Moyes related shenanigans of the previous week, so they went out and tapped up another manager and ensured the whole world knew about it.  Whatsmore, they did it in the build to an FA Cup final, and created so much of a furore they ended up having to sack Mancini as the speculation had reached fever pitch.  Good job City, well done.  
     
    Mancini knew he was done for and the result at Wembley wasn't going to make any difference, but losing to Wigan just made it easier for City to tell him to hit the road.  It's pretty funny really, he still had the loyal backing of the majority of City fans whilst the rest of the country were all like "yeah get rid of him, he's fucking shit".    I admire the loyalty of the City faithful, but it's clearly misplaced as like I've been saying for two years, he's a fraud.  A negative, defensive, arrogant, self absorbed one at that.
     
    To City fans though, he's the fella that brought them the kind of success that five years ago was beyond their wildest dreams.  That Aguero goal - ironically a year ago to the day that Mancini got his walking papers - is the kind of moment that can't ever be topped.  The only team that's even had anything close to it is Arsenal when they won the title at Anfield.  Yet as incredible a moment as that was for the Gunners, it was Liverpool they pipped to the title, not Spurs, so it could have been even sweeter.  When City won the title with the last kick of the season, they were doing it at the expense of their biggest rivals.  It literally cannot get any better than that, and that's why they'll always love Mancini.
     
    The rest of us however, look at it and say "if he wasn't so shit you wouldn't have had to wait until the last kick of the season to win it" and would also say that any decent manager would have won the title with that squad of players.  In a few years time if City continue to stay at the level they've been at recently, they'll probably start to view things differently, but right now they still seem to think they're the 'old' Man City, loveable losers who lurch from one shit manager to another.   So when they finally get one who wins them some trophies they want to stick with him, which is actually commendable.  It doesn't change the fact that Mancini is shit though and the success is down to unprecedented spending that not even Chelsea have matched.  Let's face it, you'd have to be pretty poor to not win trophies having spent that kind of money.
     
    I mean fucking hell, Roberto Martinez just won an FA Cup with Wigan, and they weren't even good enough to stay in the Premier League.  Is Martinez actually any good?  I'm not sure he is, but to listen to Dave Whelan you'd think he was Shankly, Paisley and Ferguson rolled into one smartly dressed suave Spanish package.  But if he's that good, how come he's always at the bottom of the table and he just got relegated?  If those players are good enough to win the FA Cup, beating Everton and Manchester City in the process, surely they should be able to stay in the Premier League?
     
    I'm leaning towards Martinez being a bit shit, but until he goes to another club we won't know either way.  I was pleased for them winning the FA Cup, but found it baffling to hear some of their fans saying they'd have sacrificed that to stay in the Premier League.  What kind of fucked up logic is that?  They'd rather stay up and be involved in a relegation battle every year than have the kind of day that you can tell your grandkids about.  
     
    Wigan made history at Wembley, experiencing a day like that is what being a football fan is all about.  Being in a relegation fight every year doesn't compare, even if you're successful in staving it off.  So what if they got relegated, they won the FA Cup and next year they'll be going into games expecting to win, as opposed to hoping not to lose.  As they say, better to live one day as lion than a lifetime as a lamb.
     
    That cup final meant all but one of the league games were played on the Sunday.  The exception was Aston Villa v Chelsea, which was brought forward to the Saturday to help Chelsea's preparation for the Europa League final.  A win for Villa would have secured their safety, and a draw would have all but guaranteed it too.  It was all going well for them when Benteke gave them the lead with a superb goal and then Ramires was sent off.  They led at half time, they were up against ten men and everything was coming up Millhouse.
     
    Then Benteke stupidly got himself sent off and it fell apart.  'Fat' Frank scored twice, the second one coming right at the end, and Chelsea guaranteed themselves a Champions League spot for next season.  Lampard became Chelsea's all time leading goalscorer with that double, fair play to him.  Not the most naturally gifted player of his generation but he's one of those who has squeezed every last drop out of the talent he has.  Pretty nauseating watching it though, I'm not sure what was the worst part of it; Lampard's face, the Chelsea fans running onto the pitch to join in the celebrations or Motson's arse kissing commentary.
     
    The loss meant Villa were relying on other results going their way and hoping that they didn't have to go to Wigan on the last day needing a result.  Newcastle winning at QPR secured their safety, although we all briefly had our hopes up when Remy put the home side ahead from the penalty spot early on.  Awful decision though, it was never penalty as it was outside the box.  Funny though, as for a brief time it looked like it may plunge Alain Pardieu right in le merde.
     
    It didn't last long unfortunately, as Newcastle were awarded a penalty of their own when Bosingwa tugged Ben Arfa's shirt right in front of the referee.  It was a strange one as Ben Arfa didn't go to ground and that usually means you get away with it, but it was a blatant shirt tug and Bosingwa was asking for trouble and his day would get even worse when his underhit back pass led to Gouffran's winner.  
     
    The Portuguese full back is public enemy number one at Loftus Road, what with his continually shitty performances, refusing to be a substitute, laughing after they were relegated and now this. He's a bit of a knob, obviously, but it's funny seeing how he's been demonised as though but for him QPR would have been alright.  We sing about dreaming of 'a team of Carraghers', but poor old QPR are living the nightmare of having 'a squad of 'Bosingwas'.  He's the easy target, the most obvious one, but he's not alone.  There's actually only Remy who's been any good, the rest have massively underachieved. 
     
    Redknapp bizarrely stated afterwards that whilst people have been going on about a lack of effort being QPR's problem, that's not the case and it is in fact 'a lack of quality'.  He then said that these players wouldn't be good enough to finish in the top half of the Championship.  Pull the other one 'Arry, surely no-one is gonna fall for that?  I watched some of the Championship playoff games this week, and honestly I knew about four or five players involved and I'd never heard of the rest.  QPR's squad is packed with full internationals (21of them on their books I believe), some of them household names and players that every club in the Championship would love to have.  
     
    Nothing like getting your excuses in early though. If QPR are floundering next season Redknapp will say "I told you so" and if they're doing well he'll have his mates all over the media telling us how he's over-achieving.  Not as daft as he looks is old 'Arry.
     
    Sunderland drew at home with Southampton, a result that would have been pretty catastrophic if Wigan had been able to win at Arsenal.  Wigan lost, so this was immaterial, but Di Canio has his work cut out to ensure Sunderland aren't struggling again next year.  Bardsley's deflected shot put them ahead but the Saints drew level through my boy Jason Puncheon, who's been on the bench far too much for liking recently.
     
    Over at Old Trafford, Manchester United paid tribute to Ferguson by rocking 70,000 plastic flags, the fucking losers.  Those sneaky manc fucks ensured Swansea joined in with the flag waving by giving them flags commemorating their league cup win from this season.  Paul Scholes was playing his last home game for United too, until he changes his mind in six months when he gets sick of watching Anderson embarrass himself in their midfield.  Scholes had his name chanted all afternoon, well, when they weren't singing about us, obviously.  No such luck for Ferguson though, 26 years and still no song.
     
    What's with the Chelsea style flags ayway?  Surely a more fitting tribute to Ferguson would be to actually have a decent song for him, I mean after all these years and trophies you'd think the Stretford End would have their own song for their greatest ever manager wouldn't you?  Shocking state of affairs that, if he'd been Liverpool manager at any point or had any connection whatsoever to our club, they'd have definitely had a song for him, probably involving being 'scouse' and a 'bastard' and possibly something to do with being a 'murderer', but I guess winning 30 odd trophies isn't enough to warrant your own song from the United hordes.  Tough crowd.
     
    Can't see Moyes getting one either, unless he does really shit in which case he'll obviously be a 'scouse bastard', as that Everton/United love in is pretty much a one way street, as the Blues affections are certainly not reciprocated.  And if any further evidence of that was needed, I just heard on the radio that two Everton players tried to get into Manchester United's end of season title party and had to be turned away by the doormen.  This isn't a joke, it actually happened.
     
    It seems Phil Neville was having his leaving do somewhere in Manchester, and two Everton players 'mistakenly' got the venue wrong and 'accidentally' showed up at United's party instead.  The two players in question?  Fellaini and Distin.  I can just imagine how that went down:
     
    Fellaini:  "Alright lads, we're here for the title celebration party"
    Doorman:  "What have you brought him for?  Moyesy specifically told you to bring Baines"
    Fellaini: "Bainesy didn't wanna come, he gets homesick, just ask Fabio Capello"
    Doorman: "Sorry lads, you ain't getting in."
     
    As for the game itself, Swansea threatened to spoil the party despite conceding a poor early goal when Ashley Williams failed to clear a Van Persie free-kick and Hernandez pounced.  Michu equalised in style with his 22nd goal of the season after the break, and Swansea played really well in the second half before conceding a late goal to Ferdinand.
     
    Most of the talk afterwards surrounded Rooney and his absence from the 18 man squad.  Ferguson said he assumed he hadn't wanted to play because he'd put in a transfer request, so he didn't pick him.  No-one seems to know exactly what Rooney's problem with United is, maybe he's just fed up of being the Andrew Ridgely to Van Persie's George Michael?  But then if he's Andrew Ridgeley, what does that make Danny Welbeck?  Kajagoogoo maybe? Stefan Dennis?  Daniel Sturridge scored more goals in one game at Fulham than Welbeck has managed in ten months.  TEN FUCKING MONTHS!!!  I probably owe Kajagoogoo and Stefan Dennis an apology.
     
    He's a bit needy though Rooney isn't he?  How many times has he done this now?  Two?  Three?  Dunno how Colleen puts up with him, he must be a fucking nightmare around the house.  "Wayne, do us a favour kid and put the bins out"  "That's it, I don't get any respect around 'ere anymore, I'm leaving"  "Wayne luv, there's no alphabetti spaghetti, will plain old spaghetti hoops do?"  "Fuck off, if you loved me you'd have bought me the ones with the little letters in, not fucking hoops.  I've had enough, I'm leaving"   He isn't going anywhere, you just know the attention seeking, needy tart will still be at United in August.
     
    According to the internet (that most reliable of sources), Rooney was rumoured to have been in a fight with Phil Jones, got his arse kicked and needed stitches.  Him not making the United squad for the Swansea game further fuelled the rumours, but you could see when he went up to get his medal that there were no stitches.  There was plenty of swelling around the face, but that's normal.  
     
    I'm not buying the Phil Jones fight story, but I wouldn't completely rule it out either. Jones is like the big, dumb kid who'd get picked on in school, but you'd have to be careful not to push him too far because if he lost his temper he'd do some real damage.  Taunting these kids carried an element of risk, chances are you'd be fine but if he snapped and managed to get hold of you, it could get ugly as they invariably possessed what was referred to back then as 'mong strength'.  As you can tell, political correctness wasn't big on school playgrounds back in the 80s.  
     
    I remember back when I was in 1st year seniors, there was a huge ginger haired kid with glasses who had cruelly been dubbed 'Beaker' after the character on the Muppets.  Now this cat was big, he was over six foot tall when he was 12, but he was generally easy going unless his temper snapped, in which case look out.  
     
    Anyway, one day some lads were winding him up, taking the piss out of him to try and get a 'legger' from him.  He may have been big, but wasn't the quickest unless he was in open spaces so generally he couldn't catch any of his tormentors as long as they avoided the playing fields.  Except for this one day, when one of them tripped when climbing through a hole in the fence and got a size ten boot to the head for his troubles.  
     
    Word travels fast on the school playground, and no-one taunted that big lad again after that.  If this Rooney rumour is true, you can bet none of the United players will be laughing at Jones and his stupid gurny face any more.  If there's one player in the Premier League that you just know possesses (apologies for the lack of a better expression) 'mong strength', it's Jones.
     
    Moving on, and there was another manager saying his goodbyes to his home crowd on Saturday.  Like Ferguson he was from north of the border and is a bit of a twat, but his trophy cabinet isn't quite as full as that of the departing United boss.  And by not quite as full, I mean emptier than a Scottish pay toilet.  
     
    I've got to admit, the whole Moyes love in at Goodison baffled me.  The fact is that the Blues are playing their final two games of the season with Manchester United's manager in charge of their team.  A fella who clearly conspired with Ferguson to run down his contract so he could take over at United and ensure Everton would not get a penny in compensation.  Yet he was given the mother of all send offs by the Goodison crowd.
     
    I half jokingly said last week that they see it as some kind of badge of honour that 'the great Manchester United' deemed one of their own worthy of a place at Old Trafford, but there's more truth to that than even I realised.  Look at the crowd behind Moyes when Mirallas opened the scoring, there's a few taking pictures of him and you can see one lad beaming and shouting "Get in Moyesy lad".  Bizarre behaviour.  #evertonarentwe
     
    They aren't all loons though, my cousin's a Blue and taking to him last week he couldn't understand it either, he said Kenwright should have told Moyes to fuck off as soon as he admitted he was taking the United job.  He's in a minority it would seem.
     
    They played some great stuff against West Ham, their first goal was lovely football and the likes of Baines, Pienaar and Mirallas were as prominent in this game as they were invisible at Anfield last week.  That's the Moyes effect right there.  At full time Moyes went to the centre circle and milked the applause of the crowd.  Poor Bill Kenwright was in tears, bless him.  Then again, Bill cries watching 'Britain's Got Talent', it would have been more surprising if he had managed to hold it together.
     
    Elsewhere on Sunday, Spurs went to Stoke knowing they needed a win to keep alive their hopes of pipping Arsenal to fourth spot. Nzonzi headed the home side in front from - wait for it - a set piece.  Dempsey equalised when Begovic came off his line only for a defender to clear straight to the American who gleefully rolled the ball into the empty net.
     
    Charlie Adam getting sent off in this one was the biggest sure thing since…. well since Kenwright crying over Moyes.  He hates Spurs does Charlie, especially Gareth Bale.  He can't catch Bale these days though so settled for kicking lumps out of Vertonghen instead.  The first booking was harsh but the second was just stupid as he lunged in from behind and hacked down the Belgian.  After that Spurs took control and Adebayor tapped in at the back post to win it for Spurs late on, and they need Arsenal to drop points at Newcastle on the last day if they're to make the top four.
     
    As for Stoke, well they lost so you know what that means; Tony Pulis complaining about the referee.  Bizarrely he said that this was a 'day of celebration' ruined by the referee.  Celebration of what exactly?  Fucking nutcase.  He'd be a perfect choice to replace Moyes, he's got that small time mentality that is so prevalent at Everton.  He'd love Fellaini and Big Vic too, although Baines would be the first one out the door as full backs don't play football in the world of Pulis.  Mind you, neither to midfielders or forwards.
     
    Swiftly moving on, and Norwich put their relegation fears to bed with an emphatic win over West Brom at Carrow Road.  The Baggies had the deckchairs out and this was easy for Norwich.  Snodgrass fired them ahead, Holt made it 2-0 after a horrific error by Foster, McCauley then headed into his own net and Howson added a brilliant fourth to ensure another season in the top flight for Delia's boys.  I'm glad they survived, Chris Hughton seems like a good guy, he's generally very dignified and he's done a good job to keep them up.  Put it this way, look at the players Norwich have, and compare them to Wigan and ask yourself who should have had the best chance of staying up.
     
    Wigan really shouldn't have gone down.  That's not to say they didn't deserve to, as they did.  It shouldn't have come to that though, but failure to beat Swansea at home last week combined with wins for the likes of Newcastle and Norwich on Sunday put them right behind the 8 ball as they say across the pond.  Going to Arsenal and winning wasn't an impossible task, they did it this time last year in fact, but it was a seriously tall order.
     
    They went behind to a Podolski goal from a corner.  Once again it was horrific defending, the kind of defending they are synonymous with now.  They've got the worst defensive record in the league, and that's why they won't be in it next season.  Three goals in an eight minute spell sealed their fate and kept Arsenal in pole position for the final Champions League spot.
     
    Also on Tuesday night, Man City won 2-0 at Reading but nobody cared, not even their own fans who were still grieving over Mancini.  Aguero finished off a wonderful one touch passing move to give them the lead, and substitute Dzeko wrapped it up late on.  
     
    Dzeko was sporting the short sleeves with gloves combo, which I don't like at the best of times, but gloves in May?  It's bad enough when it's an African player, but you can make some allowances for them as our 'summers' are colder than their winters, but where is Dzeko from?  *checks wikipedia*  Fucking Bosnia!!  The only way I could respect him any less would be if he had 'Edin' on the back of his shirt and started wearing pink boots.  Gloves in May *shakes head*
     
    Dave
  • Report by
    Dave Usher
     
     
     

    I can't help but wonder where we'd be if we'd had Coutinho and Sturridge here all season.  I look at how they destroyed Newcastle and now Fulham, and then think back to some of the daft points we dropped in games earlier in the season, either through not creating enough or not being able to finish.  We certainly wouldn't be below Everton and who knows, maybe going into the final game we'd be right there with Arsenal and Spurs battling it out for that final Champions League spot.  
     
    It's all immaterial, as they weren't here in August and there's no way of knowing how many extra points they'd have helped us win, but if they continue to play like this then next season there's no excuse for not mounting a sustained run at the top four, on the assumption that Suarez is still here of course.  We look much more potent away from home than we do at Anfield, and Coutinho and Sturridge are a big part of that.  
     
    The pace and threat in behind of Sturridge combined with the vision and passing ability of Coutinho is perfect for exploiting gaps left by teams who have to come out and attack on their own turf.  In our last three away games, Newcastle were hit for six, Reading should have been and Fulham easily could have been too, as we carved them open time and again in an impressive second half.
     
    We actually made harder work of this than necessary, it should never have taken as long as it did to get the third goal and really Fulham could have had no complaints had we matched the six goals we got at St James' a fortnight ago.  A combination of profligate finishing, Mark Schwarzer and the woodwork combined to keep Fulham in this one until Coutinho played Sturridge in for the goal that eventually settled it late on.  We should have been out of sight long before then in truth.
     
    With Gerrard and Agger ruled out, Rodgers took the opportunity to experiment with his line up, opting to start with a 3-5-2 formation with Wisdom and Coates coming in to partner Carragher, with Downing getting the nod over Enrique at left wing back.  The manager explained afterwards that he just wanted to have a look at it and the idea was always to revert back to the tried and trusted at half time.  It wasn't terrible, I thought we were marginally the better side in the first half, but there was a huge difference when we went back to our regular system after the break.  I like that he was willing to be flexible and try something a bit different though.
     
    The positives of the 352 system were that the wing backs got forward well and we looked solid (if a little lacking in creativity) in the middle of the park due to the extra midfielder in there.  The negatives would be a lack of chances created and the shocking goal we conceded to Berbatov.  How can you have three centre halves and allow the opposition's only striker that much space in the six yard box?  It just shouldn't happen, but that's probably a direct result of the system.
     
    I'm sure I remember hearing Alan Hansen or someone talking about how when you play three at the back, defenders often get a bit too complacent and assume one of the other centre backs will be picking people up.  This was a perfect illustration of that, if we'd been playing with two centre halves I'm fairly certain Berbatov wouldn't have had a free header.  He may still have scored as he's very strong in the air, but he'd have had to outjump a defender to do it.  Instead we were all over the place and Berbatov got in between Carragher and Johnson far too easily.
     
    To the credit of the players they were able to overcome that setback and go on to win the game, which is a rarity for us as comebacks have been few and far between.  Often we've seen games where we concede first and then just can't turn the ship around, but fortunately we got back on level terms quickly and were then able to take control in the second half.  
     
    Our equaliser was pure quality.  Wisdom cleared a long hopeful ball down the line and Sturridge set off after it, getting there ahead of Hughes before turning him inside out and then blasting a shot past Schwarzer into the roof of the net.  I've got to confess that a couple of minutes before he scored I was thinking to myself how frustrating he is.  We've seen glimpses of how good Sturridge can be, so when he's not doing it all the time it can be a bit infuriating.  Until he scored, this was shaping up a little bit like that, but from the moment he got that goal he was phenomenal and just destroyed Fulham.
     
    The introduction at half time of Enrique for Wisdom and the change in formation made us much more potent going forward and we created chance after chance.  As well as we played in the second half though, things could have been very different had Mark Halsey viewed certain incidents differently.  For example, on another day, Glen Johnson could have been sent off for a dangerous tackle.  I'm not saying he should have been, but he definitely could have.  Put it this way, I've seen lesser offences result in a red card, and worse ones not even get a yellow, so it could have gone either way.
     
    As could the Lucas 'handball' in the box.  His arm was well away from his body and the ball hit him on the hand.  Like the Johnson incident, I've seen more blatant ones not penalised and less obvious ones result in a penalty.  We certainly got lucky with that one I'd say, especially as we went up the other end and scored almost straight away, as Sturridge collected a deflected shot by Coutinho and rolled the ball into the bottom corner.  
     
    There was also an incident involving Coates and Kacaniklic that had Fulham claiming a professional foul and screaming for a red card for the Uruguayan.  To me there was nothing in that at all, the Fulham winger just collided with Coates and I'd have been livid if we'd been penalised for that.  Coming off the back of the other two calls they didn't get, Fulham fans were understandably pissed off about it, but I don't think they had much cause to be aggrieved on that particular incident.
     
    We had great chances to kill the game off, Sturridge was denied by Schwarzer after robbing the careless Hangeland, and the keeper foiled him again when he ran clear down the right, advanced into the box and tried to curl the ball into the far corner rather than square it to Shelvey or Coutinho who were both well placed.  A lot of fans are on Sturridge's case for not passing, and even Rodgers said afterwards he should have squared it.  In hindsight, yes he should have, but only because he didn't score.  If he buries it - as he should have - no-one is saying that.  Suarez wouldn't have passed either, any goalscorer worth his salt is going to back himself to score in that position, on his stronger foot and high in confidence having already scored two.  
     
    Shelvey himself wasted a great chance when he was picked out brilliantly with a right foot cross by Downing.  Jonjo brought it down on his chest, then lost his footing and scuffed the shot.  He missed a good chance in the first half too when he let the ball get stuck under his feet as it opened up for him on the edge of the box, but overall he did ok I thought.  It could go either way with Shelvey, at times he's looked a real player, other times he's just not looked up to it.  There's something there though, he's class for England u21s and when he steps down into our u21 side he's head and shoulders above the rest.  We could live to regret it if we sold him, and ideally we'll send him to a West Brom, Norwich, Swansea etc for a year to see how he develops by playing every week.
     
    He was eventually replaced by Borini who almost scored immediately, collecting a pass from Coutinho on the left and cutting inside before hitting a shot against the inside of the post.  Really unlucky, it would have been a great goal.  He had another chance shortly after when an outrageous piece of skill by Sturridge set him up, but he went across goal and Schwarzer was able to save.  There was a big space at the near post and Borini should have put it there, as should Sturridge on more than one occasion for that matter.  
     
    Downing then saw an attempted cross deflected onto the post after being set up by Sturridge. Despite all the pressure and chances, at 2-1 it was still up in the air and Fulham had opportunities to equalise.  Reina made a good diving save to deny Berbatov after Henderson's awful pass had given possession to the languid Bulgarian, and from the resulting corner Pepe was called into action again to make a fine stop from Hughes' header.  Those were rare moments of danger to be fair, but with each chance we squandered I was becoming more and convinced we'd end up throwing it away.  Thankfully we wrapped it up in fine style late on as Sturridge completed a well deserved hat-trick.
     
    What a goal it was too, Coutinho picked the ball up just outside his own box and had Riise all over the place as he jinked one way and then another, before nonchalently flicking a pass with the outside of his boot over the head of Hughes and perfectly into the stride of Sturridge who lobbed the ball over the onrushing Schwarzer and into the empty net.  When you look at some of things we've seen from Sturridge and Coutinho, not to mention the sustained brilliance of Suarez, there's certainly hope for next season.
     
    Everton's win at home to West Ham meant that this result was immaterial in terms of the league table, but we have our own personal pride to play for and it's encouraging to see that our players haven't mailed it in as some other Premier League sides have done (West Brom letting in four to hapless Norwich being a good example).  It's important that we finish the season strongly and another win next week would give us 61 points, which would be an improvement of nine points on last season.  We've scored 70 league goals with a home game against bottom club QPR still to play.  Surely that has to be encouraging even to the most sceptical of Rodgers' critics?  At the very least it's something to build on next season, especially considering Sturridge and Coutinho didn't arrive until half the season had gone.  Away from home especially we've looked very dangerous, and we haven't scored this many on our travels since 1989 apparently.
     
    The biggest problem as I see it is that the goals have come in bunches.  When we score early and get off to a good start, we're a real handful for anyone.  If after an hour we haven't scored, generally you can assume we're not going to.  We've scored nine in our last two away games, yet if we'd managed just one in our last home game (or against West Ham a few weeks back) we'd still have a shot at finishing above the Blues.  A bigger squad with more quality on the bench will help in that area, and hopefully we can get more signings in the Sturridge/Coutinho mould.
     
    The star man was obviously Sturridge, he was so good he even managed to get Carragher to join in with his goal celebration dance.  I never thought I'd see the day, but clearly Carra is just letting his hair down a little now and enjoying himself in his last couple of games.  I'm half expecting him to stroll out next week wearing white boots.
     
     
    Team: Reina; Wisdom (Enrique), Coates, Carragher; Johnson, Lucas, Henderson, Shelvey (Borini); Coutinho (Coady), Sturridge:
  • Defining whether or not a player is under-rated or not is an almost impossible task, as it’s completely subjective isn’t it? By that I mean one person could say Ray Kennedy was under-rated for example, but many Reds would comfortably have him in their top five players of all time and couldn’t possibly rate him any higher, so is he under-rated?
     
    Alternatively, you may feel that Phil Babb was under-rated, whereas I would say he’s the least talented footballer I’ve ever seen and it’s impossible to have too low an opinion of him. The point is, there is no right and wrong and no way of establishing whether a player is officially ‘under-rated’ or not, as it’s entirely about opinion and who is ‘rating’ them.
     
    When I was coming up with this side, initially I was trying to pick a team that most people would agree with, but it’s simply not possible to do it that way. So what I’ve done is chosen it completely on the basis of whether I feel they were under-rated or not, so there’ll certainly be some players in here that will have you shaking your head wondering what I’ve been smoking. That’s fine though if you don’t like it you can pick your own damn team and then I’ll pick holes in it, you contrary sods.
     
    So without further ado, here’s my All Time LFC Under-rated XI….
     
     
    Goalkeeper: The toughest decision I had to make. It’s a case of feast or famine, almost every keeper I could think of was either unanimously seen as being excellent, or simply not good enough. Generally all the keepers we’ve had are viewed as what they are, none of them split opinion. I had to choose one though, not even Kevin Keegan would select a team without a goalkeeper, so I’ve gone with Brad Friedel who proved after leaving that he’s much better than we gave him credit for when he was here, and that we definitely should have kept him. That’s hindsight talking, as I was never fully convinced by him when he was here and I remember all too well that feeble punch at Old Trafford that basically ended Brad’s Liverpool career.
     
    He’s shown since he left that he’s better than the other keepers we had at that time, and most of those that have followed actually. So much so that we tried to bring him back to the club in 2011 at the grand old age of 40, only to be beaten to his signature by Spurs who offered him a better deal and more chance of first team football. Actually, I could have gone for Steve Ogrizovic when I think about it, but I only saw him in his latter days at Coventry and given how he only made 4 appearances for us I can't really justify putting him in, so as Brad Friedel is the only realistic candidate he gets the nod.
     
     
    Right Back: I could have gone for a Barry Venison or a Steve Finnan, but the reason Venison wasn’t rated more highly is because he was no more than a slightly above average top division player. A solid pro who made a useful contribution, but unlike many others of his ilk he was never a whipping boy of the crowd. He was generally rated at the level he should have been from what I recall. As for Finnan, he turned into a very good player for us after a bad start, but most fans hold him in fairly high regard so I don’t think his contribution was particularly under-valued.
     
    So I’m going with Alvaro Arbeloa. Definitely under valued when he was here, it was almost daylight robbery by Real Madrid to sign him for the pittance they did, but then we did it to Deportivo when we brought him over here so it’s swings and roundabouts I guess. A steady rather than spectacular player, Arbeloa has been a regular for Real Madrid and Spain since leaving Anfield. How many other full backs have we had who could have gotten in those sides? Or who could have kept Messi quiet in the Nou Camp and then do the same at Anfield a fortnight later? Not many, yet Arbeloa was never really seen as anything other than a good solid player. He’s better than that.
     
     
    Left Back: I’m going for Steve Staunton, but I’m basing it on his first spell here when he was undervalued, not his second when he was completely over the hill. He suffered because of his versatility, he played all over the park, even bagging a hat-trick as a centre forward once. He used to get horrendous shit from sections of the Kemlyn back in the day, and it was only after he left that people realised what a good player he was. He was brilliant for Aston Villa, but by the time we brought him back his legs had gone.
     
    He edges out David Burrows (a personal favourite of mine back in the day) and the much maligned Stig Inge Bjornebye, a player who had his troubles but who managed one terrific season under Roy Evans and wasn’t as bad as many - myself probably included - claimed at the time. You could perhaps make a case for Riise too, I think when people look back at his time here now his contribution is under-rated (due to a poor final season and that own goal against Chelsea), but then he was probably over-rated for a time too. Not as good as many thought when he first arrived and not as bad as many thought when he eventually left.
     
    Centre backs. Technically I could make a case for Alan Hansen if you take into account international recognition. One of the most incredible aspects of football in the 80s was the lack of love Hansen got from Scotland, but a lot of it was political back then, he played in England whilst Willie Miller and Alex McLeish - two players not even in the same stratosphere as Hansen - piled up the caps because they were at Aberdeen. You can also blame Alex Ferguson of course, who left Jocky out of the 1986 World Cup. But given how Hansen is unanimously admired and revered by Liverpool fans, he didn’t really fit the criteria.
     
    Another Scot did though, he actually played with Hansen at Anfield for many years. Well, I say played, but he mostly watched. Gary Gillespie was a class act, a top defender who would have walked into virtually any other side in the country. But we had Hansen and Lawrenson, and on top of that Gillespie seemed to be permanently injured. When he played he was ace - he even scored a hat-trick at Anfield (against Birmingham) - he just didn’t get to play too often. Definitely under-rated.
     
    Alongside him I’ve gone for John Scales. Whilst the undeserving Neil Ruddock was getting all the love from the Kop, Scales quietly got on with the business of being Liverpool’s best defender for a couple of years. He was quiet, unassuming and classy. Unfortunately he was also injured quite often, and his time at the club was fairly short lived, especially when Mark Wright returned from the wilderness to force his way back in with some superb performances. He was a really good player though.
     
    I thought about Stephane Henchoz too, mainly due to him not getting the credit he deserved from outsiders.  Everyone at the club knew how good he was and the fans loved him too. In fact, I’ve never met a fan who didn’t think Henchoz was boss so I can't label him 'under-rated'.
     
     
    Right Midfield: I’m sure a lot of people would suggest Ray Houghton, but if anything I’d say he was over-rated. Admittedly I’m not the most impartial judge on this, as I idolised Craig Johnston and Houghton was signed to replace him so I never really took to him that much. I thought he was a fine player, I just much preferred Johnston that's all.
     
    Given that me and my dad were definitely in a minority there, that tells me that ‘Skippy’ is vastly under-rated. Watching him charging around the pitch at 100mph and never letting up for a second is one the most enduring images I have of watching us in the 80s, he’s my arl fellas all time favourite player and he’d make my top five too. If you’re too young to have seen him play, imagine Dirk Kuyt on speed, with the pace of Craig Bellamy and wearing a Scouser wig, and you'll have some idea of what Johnston was like.
     
    I still love Craig Johnston now, I saw an interview with him on LFCTV recently and he broke down in tears a couple of times, choked me right up it did. Every team should have a Craig Johnson. Houghton dislodged him from Kenny’s team, but he’s not getting in this one, it’s ‘Skippy’ all the way. I loved the Anfield Rap too. What a guy. If Craig Johnston was out of the equation, I'd have picked my boy Davie Thompson. I loved Little Thommo, quality player and always totally committed. We should never have let him leave.
     
    Left Midfield: I so nearly picked Mark Walters, a player who for me suffered simply because he was not John Barnes. Souness signed him from Rangers and with Barnes sidelined with a serious injury Walters was immediately asked to fill the left wing spot. He wasn’t great, but the stick he got at the time was way overboard from what I remember. I always liked him, I thought he was a talented player who made a decent contribution when he was here, but there were some fans who absolutely hated him. He scored a hat-trick at Anfield against Coventry, and he was also on the scoresheet in the famous game at home to Manchester United when we beat them to stop them winning the title.
     
    The only reason I haven’t selected him is that the same is true of another player who made far more of a contribution than Walters did; Ronnie Whelan. I could have picked Ronnie in the centre, but I’ve gone with him on the left as that was probably when he took the most stick. My memories of it are fairly vague, but I’ve heard many fans who recall it far better than I do speak of the absolute hatred some fans had for Whelan back then. A thread on the forum discussing under-rated players drew comments from people who can actually remember fellow fans who refused to celebrate when Whelan scored. Incredible really.
     
     
    Centre Midfield: Loads to choose from here. Jimmy Case, Nigel Spackman, Steve McMahon, Danny Murphy, John Wark, Mike Marsh… I never saw Case playing for us, I did see him playing against us and he was brilliant. I’m sure I remember him scoring for Southampton at Anfield with the most powerful shot I’d ever seen, I was only a kid but remember thinking ‘why the hell did we ever let this fella go?’.
     
    People tell me he’s the hardest player they’ve ever seen, but he could play too. He was part of some great sides yet he’s never really spoken about and he never got capped by England at a time when virtually all of his team-mates were in the squad. Definitely under-rated.
     
    Then there’s Murphy, I really liked 'SuperDan' but he used to get some fearful stick from the crowd. There were plenty like me who were big fans, but others couldn’t stand him. For a player who scored three winning goals for us at Old Trafford he was never given the love he deserved for me.
     
    Mike Marsh was ace too, his only weakness was a lack of pace as he had all the ability in the world.  He was a proper Liverpool player, pass and move was his game and he’s one of my all time favourite players, I was gutted when Souness shipped him off to West Ham for Julian Dicks. Marsh did a great job at right back when Rob Jones was injured, he played well at left back too at times, whilst he started out as a striker and was like the Kenny Dalglish of the reserve league. Injuries ruined his career but he's done well for himself as a coach and now works with our first team.
     
    Steve McMahon was a truly great player, he was appreciated by Liverpool fans but he was never given the respect he deserved nationally, and only got an England cap after Johnston got commentator Brian Moore to rap about it!  Spackman was a good player for us, definitely under-rated because he wasn’t as good as the likes of McMahon and Molby, but he did a good job when he was here.
     
    As for Wark, I didn’t like him as a player back in the day but that was because I was too young and uneducated to appreciate his talents. His goalscoring record from midfield was incredible, but he was never able to establish himself at Anfield and was only here a few years. He scored 28 goals from 70 appearances from centre midfield. Most forwards can’t manage a strike rate like that so he partners Case in the middle. Unlike everyone else in the side, Wark gets in because I under-rated him, not other people. I can’t believe I’ve left Murphy out though. And for those of you wondering why no Lucas, it’s because just as many people over-rate him as under-rate him.
     
     
    Strikers: I thought about Michael Owen, but I think with Michael it was a case of being under-loved rather than under-rated. Everyone knew he was top class, but some simply just couldn’t warm to him. Titi Camara was part of the shake up, I absolutely loved that guy, he was fantastic to watch and surprised everyone with how well he did for us in the short time he was here. He was badly under-used by Houllier after he signed Heskey, but in his early days Titi was electric. He'll forever be loved by Liverpool fans for playing and scoring against West Ham at Anfield on the day his dad died, and breaking down in tears as he 'celebrated' the goal. What a guy. He just missed out as I narrowed it down to three, of which I needed to select two.
     
    The three were Peter Crouch, Paul Walsh and Milan Baros. Walsh is definitely under-rated, his problem was he was competing for a place with Kenny Dalglish. When he played he was brilliant though, his best run came in the double season when he was keeping Kenny on the sidelines (by Kenny’s own choice, he was the manager after all!) and tearing it up before getting injured against the Mancs and missing the run in. My hero as a kid, and when I tell people that they usually look at me like I’ve got three heads. So he has to be in there.
     
    As for who he plays with, I agonised over this. I love Crouchy; to go all Harry Redknapp for a second he’s a top, top player, and a ‘triffic lad. The perfect hat-trick he scored against Arsenal is the best treble I’ve seen by anyone other than Suarez. Then there’s my boy Meeeelan. Loved watching him play, all of you fools who are shaking your head right now and complaining about him being a head down merchant can go pound sand. I got four words for ya; Champions. League. Winner. Baby. He edges out Crouchy, but I do it with a heavy heart.
     
    Dave Usher
     
     
  • Before I start, it’s important to stress that none of these selections are based on ability.  I need to get that in now, and no doubt I’ll mention it a few more times during the piece just to re-enforce the point as there are bound to be some of you shaking your head and saying ‘how the hell has X got in there ahead of Y’.  It’s because I’m picking my favourite ever players, and my favourite players are very rarely the best players, although there are one or two exceptions.  
     
    There’s no Kenny Dalglish because he wasn’t one of my personal favourite players.  It doesn’t mean I didn’t love him or don’t acknowledge his greatness, or that if I was picking my greatest ever side he wouldn’t be in it.  I’m sure he’d be the first name on many of your team-sheets if you were picking a side full of your favourite players, but I don’t roll that way.  Steven Gerrard isn’t in there either, although he was very close.  The thing is, I’ve always rooted for the underdog, I mean at one point Mike Marsh was my favourite player until that tool Souness sent him to West Ham.  To make it worse, David Burrows was another favourite of mine and he was also shipped off to the Hammers by Souness in part ex for that fat waster Julian Dicks.  That wasn’t a good day for me, I remember it as though it was yesterday.  I was on a work placement in college at the time, and when I heard that news I just fucked off home in disgust.  Anyway, without further ado, here we go.
     
    Goalkeeper:  The toughest decision I had to make, as I’ve never really taken much of a shine to any of our keepers.  Nothing personal, but what kind of weirdo has a goalkeeper as their favourite player?  Wannabe keepers, that’s who.  Certainly not me, my only reason for going in goal is my appalling lack of fitness that means occasionally I need to go in just to avoid having a heart attack. 
     
    When I was a kid I liked Brucie because he used to tell us the score when we asked him.  He wasn’t like regular keepers, he was interesting. But then I got a bit older and I remember him complaining about his wages and it pissed me off.  I never really forgave him for that. Mike Hooper always seemed like a bit of a weirdo to me, one thing stands out about him was something I read in the programme when he’d not been here that long.  One of the other players (can’t remember who, might have been Jocky) commented how Hooper would go nuts if anyone touched him when he came out to claim a cross in training.  That made me think he was a bit of a wrong un.  A bird watcher who quit football to become a club doorman in Newcastle, he’s clearly a bit of an oddball isn’t he? 
     
    So I’ve gone for Jerzy Dudek, partly because of Istanbul, and partly because when he first came here he was boss.  That first season he had here was the best I’ve seen from any keeper since I’ve been watching us, he was just ace, which makes what happened to him after that really difficult to fathom.  If I had to pick a favourite keeper it’d have to be him, but I never had the same kind of affection for him that I had for most of the other players I’m about to pick, because he’s a keeper and like I say, only nutjobs have keepers as their favourite players.  
     
     
    Right back:  Almost went with Rob Jones as he was always a favourite of mine despite costing me a fortune in 1st goalscorer bets at the bookies.  The problem was I needed to get Mike Marsh in the side and as I was spoilt for choice with midfielders I’ve slotted Marshy in at right back.  I used to watch Marsh in the reserves which is why I always had an affinity with him.  When I first started going to reserve games, he’d just arrived from Kirkby Town and was forming an exciting partnership with John Durnin.  When Durnin left and was replaced by Wayne Harrison, Marsh struck up a great understanding with him and they were like the Dalglish and Rush of the Central League.  He made his debut under Kenny as a striker, but eventually moved back into midfield and made his real breakthrough under Souness. 
     
    I always remember Souness commenting that if someone were to come and watch the team training, they’d think Marsh was the best player at the club.  Given that Barnes and Molby were here, that was high praise indeed, which makes it all the more galling that not long afterwards Souness got shut of him to West Ham.  Marshy is back at the club now of course as a coach, and he’s probably still of the best in training every day as he’s a proper little footballer.
     
     
    Left back:  Toss up between David Burrows and Steve Harkness.  I remember when we signed ‘Bugsy’ from West Brom.  I’d never heard of him, they were the good old days when there weren’t so many games on TV and we didn’t know every other team’s squadlist inside out.  It just wouldn’t happen now, unless we bought someone from Norwich or Southampton as no-one knows the majority of their players.  I always liked Burrows even though he was only ever decent.  The best thing about him was his tackling, he’d just fly into challenges and it was dead funny to watch.  One memory that stands out is when a few players were tussling for the ball and no-one seemed to be able to come away with it.  Next thing Burrows just went hurtling into the mass of bodies, and emerged from the pile with the ball to huge cheers from the crowd.  He ended up at Everton though, and that took a bit of the shine off him for me. 
     
    So I’m picking Harkness.  The last time I had a replica shirt with a player’s name on it, I had number 12 ‘Harkness’ on it.  True story that.  It will probably come as a surprise to many of you, but he was at Liverpool for close to ten years.   I always wondered if he’d never suffered that broken leg if he’d have established himself here.  Probably not, but at the time he got that injury he was playing great and I was proper gutted for him.  I still hate John Salako to this day.
     
     
    Centre backs:  The one player who makes this team that would also have a shot at the best of all time XI is Jamie Carragher.  I watched him in the youth team back in 1996 and it’s mad to think that 17 years later I was still watching him. He was everything I’d want in a Liverpool player.  It will be a long, long time before we ever see his type again.  In fact, we probably never will.
     
    Alongside him I’m going for Stephane Henchoz.  He was never as good as big Sami, but how could you not love Steph and his rosey cheeks?  Two minutes into the game he was blowing for tugs and looked like he’d ran a marathon whilst carrying Neil Ruddock on his back.  He was just an out and out defender, he had no attacking intent in his entire body, he just lived for protecting his goal and repelling attacks. 
     
    His song was boss too, if it hadn’t have been he may have missed out to Torben Piechnik, who also had a great song.  He was crap, I’m not suggesting otherwise, but I always liked him because he always stayed behind to applaud the fans after games and seemed like he knew how lucky he was to be here.  He must have known he wasn’t very good, but he did his best and seemed like a good guy.  But the thing I liked best about him was the ‘Teddy Bear’s picnic’ song and the bounce that accompanied it.  I can’t pick him just based on that though, so the ‘Henchman’ it is.
     
     
    Right midfield:  Easy one this, Craig Johnston.  Watching him charging around the pitch at 100mph and never letting up for a second is one the most enduring images I have of watching us in the 80s, he’s my arl fellas all time favourite player and he’d make my top five too.  I still love Craig Johnston now, I saw an interview with him on LFCTV recently and he broke down in tears a couple of times, choked me right up it did.  Every team should have a Craig Johnson. I loved the Anfield Rap too.  What a guy.  
     
     
    Centre midfield:  Two from five here.  The five were Steven Gerrard, Steve McMahon, Jan Molby, Xabi Alonso and Davie Thompson.  In the end I went for Xabi and Little Thommo.  There’s not a day goes by I don’t miss Alonso and I live in (forlorn) hope that one day he’ll return.  A great player and like Carra, exactly the kind of character I’d want in a Liverpool shirt.  A proper mans man too, just look at that beard.  He simply had to be in there. 
     
    Same with Davie Thommo.  I loved that mad little bastard.  The very first time I saw him play he was sent off in a youth cup game.  It wasn’t really his fault, a Sheffield United lad tried to headbutt him so Thommo lamped him.  He was surrounded by half of their team wanting to rip his head off, and there he was in the middle of the mob throwing roundhouses like the Tasmanian Devil.  That was Thommo, he had a short fuse and he wouldn’t be pushed around.  He wouldn’t take a back step from anybody and whilst that was one of his strengths, it was also a weakness and it cost him his Liverpool career when he fell foul of Gerard Houllier after one red card too many. 
     
    He was a class player though, skilful, hard working and tenacious.  Remember that backheel nutmeg he did at the Stadium of Light to set up a goal against Sunderland?  Brilliant.  He also scored a late Kop end winner against Chelsea.  I was gutted when he left, he should have spent his entire career with us like Carragher and Gerrard have.
     
     
    Left midfield:  Patrik Berger, la la la la la la…. What a sexy bastard, we all loved Paddy didn’t we?  Great hair, great left foot, just a proper dashing, suave looking bastard.  Over 20,000 turned up to his debut in a reserve game, and the start he made to his Liverpool career has probably never been matched by anybody, it was sensational.  Things went south for him under Roy Evans, but Houllier loved him and Paddy was reborn under the Frenchman before injuries began to slow him down.  The best left foot I’ve ever seen, he was just absolute quality. 
     
    One day me and my mate Chris were at the Academy when Paddy pulled up with his missus and his son little Patrik.  His good lady was obviously pretty damn fine, but when they got out of the car we only had eyes for Paddy.  You know that scene in Wayne’s World when Garth is eyeing up that girl in the diner, and everything is in slow motion and ‘Dream Weaver’ is playing in his head?  That’s what this was like, as Paddy stepped out of his 4x4, hair gently blowing in the breeze, with his bronzed skin and his white teeth shining.  “Damn, Paddy is looking hot” we both commented at the same time, barely even noticing his lovely blonde wife.  Two straight lads, ignoring a stunning blonde to comment on how hot her husband was looking?  It’s difficult to explain that one away, but any of you would have reacted the same way in his presence.  So handsome is Paddy that it actually offends me that my wife doesn’t think he’s all that.  What the hell is wrong with her?  
     
     
    Strikers:  Completely spoilt for choice here as being a striker myself I’ve always favoured our frontmen.  It’s probably why I’ve never given much of a shit about keepers.  For many, the names Rush, Dalglish and Fowler would spring to mind when discussing their favourite strikers.  For me, it’s Paul Walsh, John Aldridge, Titi Camara, Milan Baros, Peter Crouch and Neil Mellor.  Suarez is pushing them too, I absolutely fucking love Luis. 
     
    The two I’m picking though are Walsh and Mellor.  Walsh is my all time favourite player, my hero as a kid so he was an automatic choice whilst Mellor’s goal against Arsenal is my favourite ever Anfield moment.  I’d followed his Liverpool career more or less from the start.  An ugly ducking when he first broke into the under 19 set up, he blossomed in his second year at that level, suddenly started scoring and then never stopped.  I was doing the reserve reports for the Post & Echo back then and went all around the country watching them.  ‘The Boy Mellor’ scored over 50 goals in one season at youth and reserve level, and I must have been there for most of them.  He also did an interview for TLW around that time so he kind of became our boy. 
     
    When he scored that winner against Arsenal I can’t even describe how incredible that feeling was.  Steve Hunter’s legendary commentary on LFCTV that day summed up how I felt.  I knew how much it meant to Steve because we’d been travelling companions on all of those trips around the country watching the reserves.  Travelling up to Newcastle or Middlesbrough on a freezing February night and seeing Mellor scoring for fun, it makes it extra special when he does it for the first team.  It was tough leaving out Baros, but three into two doesn’t go unfortunately so Milan has to settle for a place on the bench.
     
    Dave Usher

     

  • Stewart Downing is hoping his improved form during the second half of the season will be enough to ensure he remains at the club next season, but says that decision is in the hands of manager Brendan Rodgers.
     
    “Me and the manager have always had open conversations and I found it difficult at the start of the season because I didn’t play, it wasn’t that I wasn’t playing well. Once I got in the team and had a run of games my form picked up and I think the team got better and better and we’ve had some good results, especially after Christmas."

    “There have been some positive signs and personally I’d like to stay but that is the manager’s decision.”
  • Well that escalated quickly didn't it?  Ferguson retiring and David Moyes replacing him?  Assuming that this is really happening and it's not just some glorious dream I'm having after falling asleep watching the 'highlights' of last weekend's Merseyside derby, then this must be how United fans felt when we appointed Hodgson.  
     
    Dress it up however you want, but the bottom line is that England's most successful club (domestically of course, we're still looking down on them with our five European Cups) and current Champions are replacing the most successful manager these shores has ever produced, with a 50 year old who has won the grand sum of fuck all in his career and has never even managed in the Champions League.  In fact, the most impressive 'achievement' listed on his CV is 'named manager of the decade by Taff's Tavern, for proving that you can be a winner without actually, y'know, winning anything'.
     
    Thatcher dead, Ferguson retiring, all we need now is for that slimeball Gordon Taylor to get hauled in as part of the Saville investigation and we're looking at the most perfect hat-trick since Ronny Rosenthal at Charlton all those years ago.  My arm is fucking killing me from all the pinching of myself I've done in the last couple of days.  I'll get to all that in due course though, there are a lot of games that need covering before I try and make sense of all that managerial madness.
     
    I'll start at the bottom, as that's where all the excitement is at right now.  With two teams already doomed, there are a number of sides who could fill the one remaining relegation spot.  The bookies favourites are Wigan, and they fell behind at the Hawthorns on Saturday when Shane Long bundled in from close range for his 11th goal of the season.
     
    A great header by Kone saw the Latics equalise but awful marking then allowed McAuley to head in a Dorrans free-kick to restore the Baggies lead.  Defensively Wigan are absolutely woeful and it undoes a lot of the good work they do at the other end.  They've always been the same though, it has to be a big question mark against Martinez as year upon year they look shite defensively.  
     
    With the game slipping away, Martinez made a double change and one of those he introduced, James McArthur, scored with a diving header within seconds to make it 2-2.  McManaman's close range effort with ten minutes remaining sealed the win, securing a huge three points for the Latics and firing a warning shot across the bows of everyone else down at the bottom.
     
    They were actually pretty awful on the day, they defended abysmally and could easily have conceded a couple of penalties.  But they believe in themselves having been in this situation and escaped on more than one occasion.  Maloney was class, setting up two of the goals and giving West Brom all they could handle and then some.  If they go down and Maloney stays, then Adel Taraabt will have some real competition to be top dog in the Championship next season.
     
    Elsewhere at the bottom, in form Gaby Agbonlahor set Villa on the way to victory at Carrow Road against freefalling Norwich.  How old is he now?  24 or something?  He's looking pretty rough these days, maybe he's got that condition that causes premature ageing?  It's only his face (and hairline) that's been affected though, as he can still move like the fucking road runner.  He can't half shift that boy, like shit off a stick as they say.  Actually what does that even mean?  Does shit move quickly off a stick, or does it just stay stuck to the stick?  And why is the shit on the stick anyway?  Does it make a difference if it's a firm shit or a sloppy shit?  Is that even the correct expression, or am I getting mixed up with shit off a shovel?  Does shit move quicker off a stick or a shovel?  
     
    Anyway, Norwich equalised from a contentious penalty awarded when Bennett pulled Snodgrass down.  Harsh I thought, I wouldn't have given it anyway.  Then again, the lad was pulling shirts and committing fouls all day and was lucky not to get sent off for persistent offending.  Grant Holt buried the pen to make it 1-1 but credit to Villa, they're showing real character these days and Agbonlahor has hit a real purple patch, he won it for them in the last minute with a fine finish.  
     
    They aren't mathematically safe yet, but they're in decent shape and have won five of their last eight.  They have to play Chelsea and then go to Wigan on the last day, so if other teams around them pick up a win or two things could still turn out badly for Lambert's side, but it would take a run of freak results to send Villa down and fair play to them as not so long ago they looked in deep shit.  
     
    Norwich must be shitting themselves now though, slowly but surely they've got dragged into it as they haven't been able to pick up any wins.  They've got West Brom at home next, a game they simply have to get something out of as the following week they're away at Man City.  A win for Wigan in one of their remaining games and Norwich are screwed if they don't get something from that West Brom game.
     
    Elsewhere on Saturday, Fulham interrupted their holidays to take on Reading at the Cottage.  Riise conceded a penalty with a clumsy kick on Robson-Kanu, who took the pen himself and scored.  The Welshman then smashed in a second just after the hour mark to give them breathing room, but my boy Bryan Ruiz hit back immediately to give Fulham hope.
     
    Le Fondre's well taken goal restored Reading's two goal cushion but then up popped Ruiz again, heading in a cross by Kacaniklic.  Someone called 'Karacan' (never heard of him before) made it 4-2 but Fulham had chances to get back into it.  Rodallega hit the post twice and the keeper made a great save, but Reading moved off the bottom with this somewhat unlikely win.  Shame on Fulham though as they were truly woeful, but what are the odds they shake off this antipathy and put on a show against us next weekend?  Nailed on I reckon.
     
    Spurs were way below par against Southampton at White Hart Lane, but yet again Gareth Bale came to their rescue.  Clein missed a sitter and Lambert hit the post with a free-kick as the visitors took the game to AVB's side.  Bale had done absolutely nothing all game, but then went into fucking superman mode again to hit a stunning winner with four minutes left to sink his former club.  Southampton looked safe a few weeks ago, they'll probably still be ok but if Wigan can do a Wigan, then you never know.
     
    Newcastle had a tricky looking away fixture at West Ham and will be fairly pleased with the point they picked up following this goalless draw.  It's been a tough week for the Toon after getting whallopped by us, and Pardew is pissed off with some of the press up there.  Apparently they've written some stories he's not happy with.  Isn't that what injunctions are for….
     
    Swiftly moving on, Man City drew 0-0 with Swansea as Dzeko missed a late sitter.  He's had a poor season really hasn't he, and it's the form of the forwards that's been the biggest difference between this year and last.  Aguero has been in and out, Tevez has been ok but not at the level we're used to and Dzeko was much better last season.  No prizes for guessing what position (other than manager) they should be looking to strengthen this summer.  
     
    Finally on Saturday, in the evening game Arsenal went to relegated QPR and scored inside 20 seconds through Theo Walcott.  Surprisingly that was the only goal of the game.  You know what doesn't sit well with me?  Walcott's tattoo's, that's what.  They just don't suit him, he's far too posh for tatts and it just looks weird.  Like jeans on a pensioner.
     
    Meanwhile, Jonathon Pearce continued his challenge to Motson's crown as the most irritating gobshite on Match of the Day with another strong outing.  "Park, the former South Korean player" he declared.  Wait, what?  Is he not South Korean anymore then?  He's bleached his hair now has Pearce, he lost a bet on QPR being relegated or something.  I couldn't believe how rough he looked when Walcott dragged him out in front of the cameras, he looked about 70.  He must have the same affliction as Agbonlahor.  As much as I hate Motson, this jabbering fool is beginning to aggravate me more.
     
    Onto Sunday, and Chelsea went to Old Trafford and beat United for the second time in three games since Benitez went there.  Bit of a strange one this though, given the disdain Ferguson has for Rafa and considering the war of words that preceded the game, his team selection smacked of not being arsed about the result, although he still put out a strong line up including Van Persie, Vidic and Howard Webb. 
     
    Mata's late deflected strike was a real dagger through the hearts of Spurs and Arsenal, as this will have been a game they were banking on Chelsea dropping points.   
     
    The game ended in controversy as Rafael was sent off for kicking out at Sideshow Bob, who hit the deck like he'd stood on a garden rake.  Luiz had provoked Rafael by throwing an elbow and then further angered United by sniggering as he rolled around on the floor.  He was quite literally ROFL'ing.    There's just no honour in football these days at all is there?  That's an international team-mate of his he's shafted there.  But because there's no honour, I bet Rafael doesn't even think anything of it next time they meet up for Brazil as it's just what footballers do to eachother these days.  (See also Ronaldo, Rooney and winking).
     
    Tell you what though, there's no way in a million years this red card would have happened had there been anything riding on the game, no way at all.  That's a yellow card all day long that is.  You could even see Sian Massey saying to Webb "yellow card please" as that's what it was.  I've yet to see that girl get any decision wrong, and she was right about this one too. 
     
    So how come Howard Webb pulled out a red card?  At this point I'd like to refer you to last week's Round Up.  "Still, with the title won expect refs to be giving all kinds of decisions against them in the next couple of weeks just pad out the stats a bit. *No red cards and no penalties conceded so far for United. *Bet you anything you like that changes in the next three games." *  Now I'm not the kind of guy to say "I told you so", but if I was the type of guy to say "I told you so" then right now I'd be saying "I told you so".  Get your money on them conceding a pen in their next couple of games.
     
    Monday night's game saw Sunderland and Stoke play out a 1-1 draw that both sides will be relatively satisfied with under the circumstances.  Going into the game Sunderland will have been hoping for maximum points, but having gone a goal down early on to Walters (from a corner, surprise surprise) and then having Craig Gardner sent off for a horrible tackle on Adam, a point is a decent enough result for them, particularly as their goal difference is much better than those around them.
     
    The game was interrupted briefly as an angry Sunderland fan came onto the pitch and started yelling at everybody.  No-one seems to know exactly what his beef was, but when I saw him pointing and shouting at Ryan Shotton I just assumed he was saying "I've got as much right to be on this field as he has", and to be fair he'd have a point.
     
    The bottom of the table was now looking really interesting and if Wigan could win their game in hand it would have put Newcastle into the bottom three.  Given that Swansea were the opposition and they've had their feet up since winning the League Cup, Wigan must have really fancied their chances. But they blew it, the fucking knobheads.  
     
    Espinoza scored with the last kick of the first half to give them the lead, and whilst Angel Rangel's cracker pegged them back shortly after the break, James McCarthy restored Wigan's advantage not long after.  And then it all went tits up as Gary Caldwell inexplicably passed the ball straight to Hernandez and Shechter scored the aid of a massive deflection.  
     
    Typical Wigan really, Martinez insists on them playing the ball out from the back but they constantly get themselves in trouble doing it, as they don't have good enough players to do it.  Trying to turn Caldwell into a ball playing centre half is like teaching a pit pony to tap dance.  Completely pointless.  It got even worse for them when they gave away an even more ridiculous goal, as Maloney and McArthur's Chuckle Brothers impersonation allowed Tiendali to notch his first goal as a Swansea player.  
     
    Had Wigan won this game they'd hve given themselves a great chance of survival, but now they have to be favourites to go as their next game is away at Arsenal.  You never know with them though, we've seen them do this before, and I'm not giving up on my dream of seeing Pardew relegated just yet.  Hey, if Moyes can take over from Ferguson then anything is possible.
     
    Also on Tuesday, City beat West Brom 1-0 thanks to a goal by Dzeko.  The most notable thing to come out of this was the inconsistency of Phil Dowd.  Kolorov almost took Tamas' head off with a high boot, the Baggies defender had blood pouring out of a gash behind his ear, yet Dowd only produced a yellow card.  This is the same ref who sent off Bobby Zamora a few weeks ago for a high boot that was nowhere near as aggressive as this one.  Perhaps he didn't want Kolorov missing the FA Cup final?  If I was Zamora I'd be pretty pissed off about that.
     
    Wednesday saw Chelsea and Tottenham face off at Stamford Bridge in a game that promised to have massive repercussions in the battle for the Champions League places, but in the end didn't really change things all that much.  The draw was more use to Chelsea than Spurs though, as the North Londoner's inferior goal difference meant they really needed to win if AVB was to realistically have a shot at finishing above the side that sacked him last year.  
     
    Oscar headed Chelsea in front but Spurs hit back through a stunning goal from Adebayor.  He's a strange one him, up until the goal his performance had been utterly risible, yet in the second half he was brilliant.  So much talent, so little desire.  He could be like Drogba if he had the drive, but far too often he looks like he's not really that arsed.  Incredibly frustrating player.
     
    Ramires restored Chelsea's advantage when he ran onto a Torres pass that was intended for Oscar (further proof that the 'assist' stat is a load of bollocks) and toe poked the ball past Lloris, but Spurs ended the game strongly and substitute Sigurdsson won them a point with a nice finish from an Adebayor back heel with ten minutes to go.  Bale was completely anonymous, so fair play to Spurs for getting a result without any real contribution from him.  AVB's goal celebrations make me smile, he's such a little dweeb but I can't help but like him.  
     
    Chelsea fans booed Rafa's substitutions and chanted Mourinho's name.  It was almost enough to make me hope he got the United job, as how funny would that have been?  Imagine the reaction of the Chelsea fans?  Not going to happen though sadly, as Moyes has now been named as Ferguson's replacement, which is just as funny actually.
     
    There's two schools of thought on Moyes.  One is that he's a great manager who has punched well above his weight at Everton and will do a great job at a club with more resources.  The other is that his level is playing the plucky underdog, at a club with (relatively) low expectations, signing players from the Championship and turning them into good Premier League players, never winning trophies and never doing anything in big games.
     
    I've got both feet planted in camp two, but we'll all find out who David Moyes really is now that he's landed one of the big jobs.  He warmed up for it in fine style with his ridiculous whining about never getting decisions at Anfield, and from that perspective he'll be a great replacement for Ferguson.  
     
    I genuinely never thought this day would come, Manchester United could have pretty much any manager in world football, and they've chosen David fucking Moyes!!  Clearly Ferguson is the one making this decision as there's no way anyone else at United would bring in a manager with NO CHAMPIONS LEAGUE EXPERIENCE and NO TROPHIES.  It's a huge risk by them, but this is just Ferguson's way of retiring without actually retiring.  He'll still be sticking his purple beak in, the question is whether or not Moyes will be ok with it.  Presumably he is.
     
    Whatever I may think of Ferguson as a man, I'd say he's worth 10-12 extra points a season to United based on his ability to get the absolute maximum out of the players and referees he has at his disposal.  Will Moyes be able to do that?  We'll find out next season.  It's going to be interesting to see how he copes with the expectation of going to Stamford Bridge, Anfield, the Emirates, Etihad etc and trying to win the game as opposed to not losing it.  
     
    It goes against everything he's shown in the last ten years.  Of course he'll have much better players to choose from and who knows, maybe that means he won't be such a big game bottler in future.  A leopard never changes it's spots, and I'm expecting him to show up at Anfield next season with Phil Jones and Fellaini up front.  Obviously the first thing he'll do is sign the candy floss headed, elbow throwing Belgian, he'll probably take Baines too, and Everton fans will take it as a compliment that the Champions deem their players and manager good enough to represent them.  It's like some weird badge of honour. 
     
    I can't get my head around it, United take the best player they've produced in a generation,   they then come back and steal the best manager they've had in a generation, and no doubt they'll now be back for some of their other players.  They're essentially a feeder club for United, the Premier League should probably investigate it really.  United take what they want from the Blues, and send them a load of scraps they don't want in return.  
     
    This Moyes thing is so clearly a huge stitch up on United's part, yet somehow Everton aren't joining up the dots.  He's let his contract run down and they won't get a penny in compensation.  Why has he done it?  Because his pal 'Fergie' tipped him the wink ages ago that he'd be stepping down and that the job was his if he wanted it.  They've played Everton like a cheap fiddle.  But do the Blues get mad?  Do they fuck, no doubt they'll be cheering even harder than usual for a United title next season.  Once a blue always a manc etc
     
    There's every chance this move will weaken both of our two main rivals, it's just unfortunate we don't appear to be in any position to take advantage as we've got our own problems.  Whoever comes in at Everton will have a difficult job matching what Moyes has done, especially if he takes some of their best players with him.  And I don't care who it is replacing Ferguson, no-one is going to top what he's done so they are automatically weaker and would have been regardless of who they had appointed.  How much weaker depends on whether Moyes is actually a big club manager or not, and there's no way of knowing that yet as he hasn't managed a big club.
     
    Martinez is reportedly being lined up by Kenwright, but Dave Whelan says Everton aren't a big enough club for Martinez.  As much as that amuses me, it shows what a crank Whelan is as Martinez isn't going to get any better than Everton if he leaves Wigan this summer, yet to listen to Whelan though you'd think he was Pep fucking Guardiola.  
     
    Mark Hughes is touting himself for the Everton job too.  I'd love it if they hired him, but they aren't that stupid.  After what 'Useless' did at QPR he should never get the chance to manage another club ever again.  He will though, as he's part of that shit manager merry go round.  People like Hughes, Bruce, Pardew, Neil Warnock, Phil Brown etc just bum around from one job to another, getting sacked, appearing on Goals on Sunday a couple of times with 'Kammy' and then and then getting hired by some other sap and repeating the process all over again.
     
    Here's hoping that in 12 months Moyes is on that merry go round too, as there aren't many chairmen around like Bill Kenwright who will give him ten years without a trophy.  
     
     
    Dave
  • Dave Usher
    reports from
    Anfield
     
     
    Well that was pretty drab and uninspiring.  It was unquestionably one of the worst Anfield derbies in a long time, by the end of it neither team looked like they wanted to win it and the lack of urgency from both sides in the final 15 minutes was surprising - and from our point of view extremely disappointing.  A draw was a great result for the Blues as it all but guaranteed finishing above us for a second season in a row, so their approach was understandable.  Ours on the other hand, was not.
     
    I don't know if it was fatigue or disinterest, but either way it's alarming how we ended this game.  We hadn't played especially well in the 75 minutes that preceded it, but at least we were trying and the intent was there to win the game.  Towards the end it looked as though we'd just accepted that we weren't going to score and were ok with it.  The amount of times we had throw ins only for Johnson and Enrique to have nobody to throw the ball to said it all for me.  It was the same when Reina claimed a cross and wanted to launch a quick counter.  Not enough people were showing for the ball.  We were not going all out to win this game, and to me that's very disappointing.
     
    The substitutions made by Rodgers certainly didn't help, we looked worse after the first change and much worse after the second.  However, it's not as though we had much quality on the bench to change things and at least he was trying to do something different to try and find a breakthrough.  Until we have better options to bring on from the bench, it's going to be difficult for the manager to make match winning substitutions.  The sight of Borini and Skrtel coming on was pretty demoralising.
     
    I know Borini is a striker and he cost a fair few quid, but if I'm honest I've got zero confidence in him changing a close game for the better and as for the Skrtel for Downing change?  Well that was just pretty bizarre, and presumably it was done in part to help us out defending set pieces because I'm struggling to come up with any other logical explanation for that one as both full backs were getting forward anyway (especially Enrique) and we didn't need to go three at the back to do that.  But then if it was about height at set-pieces, surely Coates would have gotten the nod?  A strange one that.
     
    Neither side really did enough to win the game, but if we had sneaked a winner I wouldn't have said it was undeserved as we were marginally less shit than the Blues on the day.  Don't get me wrong, I thought defensively they were excellent, in particular the two centre halves who were both very impressive, but they offered zero threat at the other end other than the occasional set-piece.  It's weird really as the one thing I wasn't expecting from this was a goalless draw.  Considering the trouble we've had defending corners, I thought it was nailed one we'd concede a goal in that manner.  Conversely, given how irresistible Coutinho and Sturridge looked last week I thought we had goals in us. 
     
    We started the game quite brightly, and it was apparent that a big part of our gameplan was for Sturridge to pull wide any time their full backs went forward and for us to hit him early in the space left behind.  Gerrard did it twice with trademark 60 yard passes, whilst Henderson also got in on the act with a ball that the skipper himself would have been proud of, absolute top drawer it was.  They came to nothing but it was encouraging to see Sturridge involved and looking lively. A pity it didn't last. 
     
    Chatting to the lads before the game, I'd singled out Sturridge as the key to us winning this game.  If Suarez had been available I'd have expected us to win this one by a couple of goals, but his absence levelled things up considerably for me.  For us to win, Sturridge needed to be at the kind of level he was against City, Chelsea and Newcastle.  If he wasn't, I couldn't see us having enough to win the game as I was convinced we'd concede.  It's fair to say he wasn't at that level, although he started brightly enough.  Overall though his performance was ok but nothing special and as a result so was the team's.  He did a lot of things well but his decision making let him down on occasion and Suarez was sorely missed. * insert your own 'lacking in bite' or 'toothless up front' gag here *
     
    Moves of any real quality were few and far between, but those that did come were from the men in red.  The clearest opening we had in the first half came when Downing made a good run in behind to collect a pass from Johnson.  He skinned Baines and chipped to back post where Henderson was waiting.  Coleman couldn't clear properly and Hendo collected and cut it back to Gerrard who's goalbound shot was blocked by Jagielka.
     
    It was typical of Everton's defending, any time we had a sight of goal a blue shirt appeared to snuff out the danger, usually one of the centre halves.  A nice move involving Enrique and Coutinho saw the Brazilian find Henderson running though, he probably should have gone himself but tried to square to Sturridge only for Distin threw himself in the way and kill the attack stone dead.
     
    Downing then picked out Henderson who produced a lovely flick into the path of Sturridge.  He was tightly marked by Jagielka and couldn't get a shot away, and although the loose ball fell to Coutinho he was thwarted by a terrific block challenge (by Gibson I think although it could have been Jagielka again).  Everton had just one serious attempt in the first half, when Fellaini prodded wide from a free-kick that should have been awarded to us when Pienaar blocked off Johnson.  
     
    The only real concern our players had in the opening 45 minutes was trying to avoid the wild elbows being throw by Fellaini.  He got away with murder at Anfield last season and at the Pit this year and he was at it again here.  In the first half alone he elbowed Agger in the face and narrowly failed to connect with Lucas and Gerrard.  Skrtel copped for one in the chops late on too.  He knows exactly what he's doing, anyone gets close to him and the elbow comes up and into the face, and yet referees allow him to do it time and again.  What's it going to take before he gets pulled up on it?  A broken jaw? Fractured cheekbone? Dislocated eye socket?  It's only a matter of time before this microphone headed goon seriously injures somebody.  Lucky for him he isn't Uruguayan.
     
    We started the second half very brightly, within two minutes of the restart Coutinho's wonderful ball put Sturridge in but Howard did well to force him wide and smother his shot.  He probably should have taken it first time but I can't be too critical over it as it was a split second decision and Howard deserves a lot of credit for how well he dealt with it.  Seconds later Sturridge flashed a shot on the turn into the side netting as we threatened to get on top.    We were playing with a better tempo now and another flowing move ended with Enrique whipping in a cross that just eluded Downing and was claimed by Howard.  
     
    Then came the most contentious moment of the game when with ten minutes gone in the second half, Distin headed in a Baines corner at the back post a second or two after Michael Oliver had blown for a foul by Anichebe on Reina.  The replays showed it to be a very soft decision, and I'd say we got away with one there.   Playing devils advocate for a second here though (and it's easy to do that when we're the ones who benefitted from the decision!), from the refs point of view he was warning Anichebe about impeding Reina before the kick was even taken.  That suggests to me that this was an ongoing thing he'd picked up on, and despite popular opinion that 'the keeper ran into Anichebe' that's not the whole story, as Anichebe knew what he was doing and made a point of ensuring there was a collision.  He wasn't going for the ball, that had gone well over his head.  His job was to get in front of the keeper to make it difficult for him.  It was clearly a rehearsed set piece and that was his job.  Having said that, it wasn't enough of a 'foul' for me and like I say, there's no question we got away with one and if Oliver hadn't blown his whistle I very much doubt I'd be complaining of a foul on the keeper.  
     
    I'm just saying I can see what the referee was thinking, and Anichebe wasn't as 'innocent' as Moyes is making out.  Besides, he didn't 'disallow a goal' as he blew the whistle as soon as he saw the contact between Pepe and Anichebe.  What happened after that was irrelevant to Oliver as his decision had already been made.   Distin (who ironically, had committed more of a foul on Carragher than Anichebe had on Reina) could have headed that ball ten yards over the bar for all Oliver cared.  Sorry to disappoint Moyes and his 'Anfield consiracy theories', but Oliver wasn't 'disallowing a goal', he was awarding a free-kick and the Blues just happened to put the ball in the net after that free-kick had been given.
     
    That decision may have cost Everton a goal, but it's stretching things wildly to say it cost them two points.  Why?  Because had it stood there were 35 minutes left for us to push for an equaliser, who knows what would have happened.  This wasn't like the wrongly disallowed Suarez goal at the Pit, which came with the last kick of the game and absolutely, categorically cost us two points.  We've fallen behind to Everton before and come back to beat them, in last year's FA Cup semi final for example.  A lot can happen in 35 minutes, but to listen to Moyes you'd think that decision cost them a guaranteed win.  After what happened at Goodison earlier in the season you might think he'd not make too much of this one, but then this is David Moyes we're talking about.
     
    "People are quite quick to remind me that I have not won here at Anfield but if you don’t get any decisions it is very hard to win here. And that is quite a regular occurrence when we come to Anfield."  Hahahahaha yeah THAT'S why you've never won at Anfield.  Nothing to do with shitting your pants very time you come here.  Moyes is just so incredibly small time.  For two years the league table has been tapping him on the shoulder and saying, "you're actually better than these you know" but he just can't buy into it. He can't shake the inferiority complex he has where Liverpool are concerned, it manifests itself every derby game, but especially the ones at Anfield.
     
    I'm not kidding myself that we're miles better than Everton and in a false position.  On our day I think we're superior, but we don't have enough of those days and they are more consistent, which is why barring some unforeseen set of freak results they will have finished above us for two years in succession.  What I'm saying is that Moyes obviously can't bring himself to believe they're better, and it shows any time he puts a team out to face us.  He talks like finishing above us isn't even on his radar, when really it's his number one priority at the start of every season.  He'd probably take that over winning a trophy.
     
    I've watched the Blues play some brilliant football at times this season, but you can't blame Steven Gerrard for making that Stoke comparison a while back because the fact is, when we play Everton we don't see that brilliant football because Moyes won't let them play.  When the derby comes around, he goes full on alehouse, especially at Anfield.  There was nothing more certain than Jelavic being on the bench and Carragher and Agger having to deal with the twin towers of Anichebe and Fellaini.  Nothing more certain.
     
    Every time their defenders had the ball, it was launched in the direction of Fellaini or Anichebe, and as a result we barely saw their ball players, Pienaar, Mirallas, Osman, Baines….  Players who've looked top quality this season but who were anonymous at Anfield.  That's the Moyes effect, he can't bring himself to believe that his side are actually good enough to take the game to us on an equal footing and let his players express themselves.  There was no chance of that happening, and all week I'd been telling people exactly what we should be expecting from them.  I'm not psychic, I don't have any mole in the Everton camp, I've just been watching Moyes operate in derby games for long enough to know how his weasely little mind works.
     
    The only threat to us was only ever going to be set pieces.  Nothing else, just set-pieces.  I could have told you that before the game, and that's exactly how it panned out.  The disallowed 'goal' came from a corner, and the only other chance they had was the one that 'Screech' prodded inches wide following a free-kick.  The Blues are capable of playing excellent football and they've shown it for a lot of the season, but if all we ever see from them is alehouse, they can't get all precious when one of our players compares them to Stoke.  Everton play much better football than Stoke, they just don't do it against us.  And that's not because they can't do it, it's simply because of Moyes.
     
    The table suggests that Everton have no reason to feel inferior to us at this moment in time, yet they clearly do.  Why else are they celebrating a 0-0 draw?  Why else are they singing "we're looking down on the Redshite".  It is a big deal to them, they see it as some kind of anomaly, a break from the norm (because let's face it, it is).  It's like flicking through the channels on sky and finding extra sports channels you're not supposed to have.  You can't believe your luck but you know it's only a matter of time before they realise and cancel them on you but until normal service is resumed you're going to make the most of those channels and enjoy it to the max no matter what kind of shit they put on there.
     
    That's Moyes and the Blues right now.  He can say whatever he likes about how finishing above Liverpool isn't his priority and they are 'thinking bigger than that'.  He's fooling no-one though, if that was the case he'd have showed up to Anfield and tried to win the game as opposed to not losing it.  Instead of pointing the finger at the referee, he should be looking in the mirror (metaphorically, not literally, I wouldn't wish that even on him) because it's his own shithousery that holds Everton back at Anfield.
     
    It says a lot that we're all incredibly disappointed with our side's performance whilst they seem made up.  And yet despite not playing well we still had far more openings than they had.  It's all about what standards you set for yourself, and we still have higher standards than the Blues.  The problem is we aren't consistent enough to reach those standards.  6-0 one week, 0-0 the week after.  Sums us up, and we'll probably get beat by hapless Fulham next week too.
     
    Like I say though, we had our chances to win this.  Just not enough of them.  The closest we came to a winner was when Sturridge got in through the inside left channel and advanced into the box.  Gerrard made a lung busting run to get ahead of him and the striker did well to hold the ball up and release the pass at just the right moment into the path of the captain who went around Howard but as he adjusted his feet couldn't get enough purchase on his left footed shot and Distin was able to clear off the line.
     
    There were other half chances too, Agger had a couple of headers from set-pieces that he should have done better with, Coutinho put one shot straight at Howard and another high and wide, whilst a lovely ball from Sturridge saw Enrique drill a ball across the face of goal just out of the reach of Borini.
     
    I've noticed that Enrique has been getting absolutely ripped by many for his performance.  I actually thought up until the final 15 minutes or so he was one of our better players.  At that point desperation seemed to kick in and his decision making went out of the window, getting his head down and not passing when he should and generally just running into trouble through trying too hard.  He was much better than our other full back though, who just isn't himself right now.
     
    Johnson's form the last couple of months has been really erratic.  I don't know what's going on with him but there's been times where he's played with his head up his arse, he's been completely indecisive in the final third and just really hesitant.  Earlier in the season that wasn't the case, he was brilliant going forward, but recently he's been very inconsistent.  It could just be a case of him needing a bit of a rest, he's played a lot of games in the second half of the season especially.  At times he's been world class, at other times he's been average and there have been occasions when he's been terrible.  His form mirrors that of the team as a whole.
     
    This result pretty much seals our fate in terms of league position.  7th, which is a slight improvement on last season although we haven't had any significant cup runs to get in the way of league form this year.  Then again, you could argue that last year we didn't have European competition to disrupt our early season league games, so you can interpret it however you choose.  Personally I feel like we've significantly improved our performances and our first eleven is very good.  The biggest problem we have is when we haven't made a breakthrough after an hour and we need to change things, we've not had the quality to bring on.  We need more game changing players, but unfortunately we also need to rebuild the defence as Carragher and (probably) Skrtel are going to need replacing.  It's going to be a big summer for Rodgers, there's plenty to be done but we have a good base on which to build and with the right signings we could be very good.  How many years have we been saying that though?  The 'right signings' never seem to arrive, regardless of how much we spend.
     
    I can accept finishing below both Manchester clubs, Chelsea, Arsenal and Spurs.  We've got no right to EXPECT to be finishing above those sides as they've been above us for a number of years now, if we overhaul one or more of those then we've punched above our current weight.  I did think we would finish above the Blues this year though, but two things have prevented that.  One is our own inconsistency, and the other is that Everton have performed better than I thought they would.  Credit to them for that, they've had a good season and deserve to be where they are.  No complaints, no excuses, they deserve to be ahead of us.
     
    It's now up to us to get our act together next season and ensure they won't be coming to Anfield and singing about 'looking down on the redshite'.  We can't stop them singing about Gerrard's baby, or Rodgers' son being 'a nonce' and we can't stop them telling us we're "always the victim" and how it's "never our fault".  We can stop that 'Looking down on the redshite' chant though, and we better fucking had do, as another year below them would be completely and utterly unacceptable.
     
    As for the star man, Carragher and Agger both impressed and stood up to the physical barrage very well indeed, whilst Coutinho had his moments too.  Everyone else needs to be doing better though, with one notable exception.  Steven Gerrard was just phenomenal in everything he did, he was comfortably the best player on the field which speaks volumes about him considering the shoulder injury he's been carrying and has now sadly ended his season.  Gerrard has been brilliant this season, second only to Suarez, and now we have to play the final two games without both of them.  And it's hard to believe Carra and Stevie have played their last game together.  It really is the end of an era.
     
     
    Team:  Reina; Johnson, Carragher, Agger, Enrique; Lucas, Gerrard; Downing (Skrtel), Coutinho, Henderson (Borini); Sturridge:
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