Rico1304

Went to Liverpool 1, a bar called something sugar. eff me, if I wasn't fat old and ugly I'd have pulled. Although I did, with a bird I thought was about 35 but turned out to be 24, if there is a sunbed in the world she'd not been on I'd be surprised. Oh and the f**** was rubbish.

I've started to type this about 4 times. This is my last effort. You should have your computer smashed, incinerated and then the remains put on a rocket into space. Towards a black hole. Then the entire internet should be disabled, electricity outlawed and the spoken word banned. Just to prevent your complete idiocy from ever being inflicted on any right-minded human.

I've just had the same conversation with my girlfriend. I like to cuddle in the night and my alarm cock wakes me most mornings. As long as he doesn't push back.

any last minute advice then lads?

What about Fizz (2nd left)?

Anyone see the story about the egg-chaser who hit the bar with a drop goal in an half time competition? Well check out the story on the BBC website and look at the 'cheerleaders' the guy is posing with. They look like they work at Mike Baldwin's factory. Rough as fuck. Now, can a friendly geek post the pictures for an aging Luddite?

Its me and my brother. However there is only one bed in the room and you know what they say, keep it in the family! Think we'll start local and then move out as the dick heads move in. We're looking for a decent bar, not getting our heads kicked in and looking at ladies that aren't swamp donkeys.

on Friday night, somewhere called the Staybridge Suites. Are we best going on near the docks or walking into town? Cheers in advance (by the way we are 2 hetro males, 37 and 30)

Blade isn't bad

If you weren't jet-setting round the world it wouldn't be such a strain (I suppose that's my hard earned rep from earlier gone)

Sad? It's cool as fuck. Scene - An Ysgol, Monday morning 'What did you do at weekends mini-Melons?' 'I went to Spain for the day with my family, did some Spanish shit. What did you do?' 'Watched Going Live, moaned I was bored and then X factor. Will your mum adopt me?'

I got 30 pages in before I realised they were shite. I was then forced to watch the film by my missus. I killed her and buried her in the garden. It was for the best.

Great presenter, she's furious!

Just watched 2 episodes, I think it's great. 'I've got Gloria, I've got Gloria' from the dad during the fighting with her and the mum was quality.

A mate of mine went to a 30th birthday party last week, it was themed The Oscars. Everyone else went in tux's and lovely dresses, he spent £40 on an Oscar the Grouch costume and stormed it. If I wasn't an idiot I could post pics but google the costume, it's quality.

If only, sounds too dangerous if you ask me. (It was under an assited scheme set up by the government and the electricity companies in case anyone was interested. No? Thought not)

Ha ha you miserable bastards. I suppose it was a dull question but for at least 24 hours I needed to know.

I'm having some work done to my house, including electrics. As the house was built before electricity was common place it got me to thinking...who was responsible for connecting exisitng houses to the Grid, wiring them etc... (Please forgive me for being dull)

Was that where Sophia Viagra said she dressed her son as a girl for the first year of his life? And when he saw the photos told him it was his twin sister who died because she didn't want to mess him up - I pissed myself.

Anyone watching it? It's genius

Who said he was playing?

A mate of mine went to a club near us (Bredbury Hall if you must know) on Saturday night, he pulled a bird and went back to hers where he nailed her. She tells him that she has a boyfriend who is in the army currently out in Afganistan. Now that is cold but it gets worse. He wakes up Sunday morning and is late for footy but he's only got his suit and doesn't want to turn up to footy wearing it. So, the dirty bitch lends him some of her boyfriends clothes!!! That's got to be the worst thing I have ever heard.

I beat him in the Great North Run this year. I think that, plus the fact i think I know where Hull is, makes me a better manager than him.

I LOVE the way they constantly refer to him as God. Him and Torres would be frightening, I think I'd explode.

Torres gets 8/10 in the Times today