TheDrowningMan

You could almost imagine that working out quite well with some of the players we have. Is he glamorous enough though?

Sounds better than sacked three times by the two biggest clubs he's managed.

Espresso and amphetamines.

Van Gaal needs four goals to equal Moyes' opening league game.

If Van Gaal devises a way to lose today - I don't think he will, by the way - how long until the first murmurs of discontent are heard?

The BBC hive mind thinks we're going to be shit enough without Suarez to let Man Utd instantly reclaim their place in the top four. http://www.bbc.co.uk/sport/0/football/28778605

Odds on Palace going down? I'm not sure there has ever been a side so tightly nailed on for the drop.

Arsenal are looking good for another excellent August to February.

Don't forget Lovren. I'm sure £60m for substitutes must be part of the nefarious / incompetent FSG / Rodgers' plan to decimate our club.

£28m. Paupers. To be fair to Martinez, I doubt he'll play Moyes' beloved "we're not a small club...but we are a small club" card.

They wouldn't be top of my list, but Le Tallec and Pongolle have to be up there, simply because of the GH hyperbole surrounding their arrival.

Yep. Hat-trick, season-long ban for biting Pepe in the nuts and a transfer to Man City for £10m in the summer.

I thought it was Fellaini having turned to drink.

An inferior keeper who knows his role and is content to sit there is better to have around than one who's huffing and puffing the entire time.

His exit is imminent, apparently.

The very same Spurs team that had made a start unprecedented for them in the Premier League era until Sherwood was parachuted in to the managerial position.

That's a good deal for everyone. Sunderland get a player who did a very good job for them at what will be a decent price if he repeats the form this year, we make a profit on a player who, while talented, is surplus to requirements. I'm...pleasantly surprised.

I'm sure Roy will manage to shoehorn a reference into a future press conference. Something like: "I think the supporters need to realise that we are England, not Germany, Argentina or Brazil. Given our FIFA / Coca-Cola World Ranking, it would be very odd to think it realistic for us to perform better than we did".

Game over.

You might be right, although Argentina are the only international team with a better record at penalties than Germany.

Germany are a truly loathsome side. Scheming, whining, preening; a godawful marriage of continental stereotypes and Arsenal Football Club. Entertaining match though.

Clear red. Germany are every inch the flat track bullies. It's probably all over if Argentina score first.

Team for team, it's the biggest league. It's just that Real Madrid and Barcelona happen to be much bigger than any other clubs on the planet. They come in for your player, and he's probably going to leave. That's the case whether you're Liverpool, Manchester United, Bayern Munich of AC Milan. Perhaps the only viable long term option is to avoid possessing a single truly great individual and build a monolithic squad like Chelsea or Man City - neither contains a player the aforementioned Spanish giants would jump through hoops for, but they have the depth to ensure that they're never going to be left behind regardless of who departs.

£64m according to Spanish sources. 6.5% goes to Ajax.

He'd do well with the current Netherlands team.