Sunday Dec 18:
What a final that was. For 75 minutes it was a bit boring (France were dogshit) but then wow, it went fucking nuts. To begin with I was probably 51% wanting France to win just because I didn’t want to see Messi winning it. Then they went 2-0 down and all I was hoping was they would pull one back just to make a game of it. They were fucking woeful up until the point they got a goal back (Otamendi doing Otamendi things) but then after that the game was fucking brilliant. As was Mbappe. Credit to the French for making a fight of it and coming back twice, but more credit to Argentina for not shitting themselves when that happened.
When it went to pens they were always going to win it because of the keeper. He’s a bad knobhead and when it reached that point I wanted them to lose but it was no longer because of Messi (I didn’t begrudge him winning it at that point), it was because of that tit in goal. But I knew he’d be the one to win it because that’s what he does. And Lloris was as much use as a chocolate fireguard. He was never saving anything, the bum.
Martinez was acting the twat but we knew he would. Lloris is the France captain but he did fuck all to stop Martinez. He should have been retrieving the ball and giving it to his penalty takers, instead he was letting Martinez have it and then get in the faces of the French lads or throw the ball away and make them get it. The ref enabled it too. He let Martinez throw it away from Tchoemani who then missed his kick. The knock on effect was he then got to try and shithouse the next taker too. The ref booked him that time, but he should have done it after the first one.
Martinez will do whatever it takes to gain an advantage in those situations, which is fine as you want to win and if your keeper acts the cunt to make it happen then so what? He’ll be a massive legend in Argentina and rightly so. When you’re on the wrong end of it though it’s infuriating, but I have no sympathy for France because their captain let it happen, the big fucking wet wipe. They also dropped Konate too, so fuck them for that. Mind you, Upemacano was not the reason they lost as he played well and I’ll take back my “Upemeclowno” jibes from last week.
So anyway, Messi has his title and he deserves it. He’s not performed the way he should have in other World Cups but he’s been brilliant in this one and therefore I can’t begrudge him his moment. It’s some comfort that whenever he looks back at the photos of his finest moment, he’ll have to look at himself wearing that Harry Potter cloak the King of Qatar (the real one, not Trevor Francis) gave him. Qatar own him though so he’ll do as he’s fucking told. Well, they part on him. I think the Saudis have a piece of him too.
I’m happy for the Argentinian fans as they’ve been brilliant. I’ve always had a lot of time for them as their songs are boss and they’re so passionate. Whenever I see footage of them in the streets, all wearing their Argentina shirts and bouncing up and down having a great time, it reminds me of what I did to them when I was holiday in Spain. I think I’ve told this story before but I’ll tell it again as it was so funny. So there was a load of them outside a bar, we’re talking hundreds of them, and we had to walk through them. On the way through I crop dusted the fuckers. It wasn’t anything personal, as I say I love the Argie fans, but I had horrific farts that day, the kind that are so thick they leave their own mist cloud. So I walked through, farted and didn’t look back. I didn’t need to look, I could hear the coughing and spluttering and complaining in Spanish. I was fucking pissing myself but my missus wasn’t amused at all. It was great though.
The real star of this tournament is the topless Argentinian girl on the front row. Sensational stuff that. You’re in a country where women are thrown in jail for showing too much shoulder, and she’s there giving it the beans with no top on. I hope she gets back to Argentina before they identify her.
Overall though as a spectacle this was one of the best World Cups ever. That’s got fuck all to do with the hosts though and all of those pushing the “they put on a great tournament, what do you all have to say now” need to pipe down. World Cups are about the games and it doesn’t matter where they are, who organised them or how nice the stadiums are. That matters for fans who are actually there, but for the other 99.99999999% of people watching it’s purely about the teams involved and whether they entertain us or not. Mostly they did. The knockout stages were really good and overall I enjoyed it. I didn’t think I would, and I feel a little dirty for even watching the fucking thing considering how many people died to bring it to us, but from a purely football point of view it was good, and it was probably the best final of my lifetime.
Now its over though so we can get back to the real stuff.
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