Sut

Cains's Red Eric

Stantz: Everything was fine, until dickless here cut off the power grid! Mayor: Is that true? Venkman: Yes, Your Honor, this man has no dick.

Modelo Especial is an acceptable beverage.

A fella goes to the doctor with a strawberry growing out of his head. The doctor takes a look and says, "I've got some cream you could put on that."

How do you get a parrot to speak? Put it on the 81.

Two cannibals are eating a clown. One says to the other, "Does that taste funny to you?" Two snowmen standing in a field. One says to the other, "Can you smell carrots?" Two goldfish in a tank. One asks his mate, "Do you know how to drive this thing?"

Its kind of related... http://cgi.ebay.co.uk/GOODFELLAS-SIGNED-BY-DE-NIRO-PESCI-SCORSESE-KILMER-ETC_W0QQitemZ200078949167QQihZ010QQcategoryZ18833QQrdZ1QQcmdZViewItem I'm putting a script for the Magnificent 7 up for sale. Now its not an original, but I did download and print it myself before doing some rather excellent (if I do say so myself) copies of all seven's autographs (even Horst Bucholtz and Brad Dexter's). Only twenty quid. You'd be mad not to want it.

http://www.scorsesefilms.com/news.htm#departed2 2 Feb 07 DeNiro to Join Scorsese in Departed II? With a domestic take of $125.2 million, Warner Bros. Pictures and director Martin Scorsese are seriously considering following the money and making a sequel to Academy Award nominated film "The Departed". According to the Hollywood Reporter: "Talks are under way to put together a sequel to the crime thriller, which has garnered five Oscar nominations and is the biggest boxoffice hit of Scorsese's long career. Sources say that "Departed" writer William Monahan is working on a take that would bring back the temperamental foul-mouthed cop played by Mark Wahlberg, who received an Oscar nomination for the role, and introduce a new character to be played by none other than Robert De Niro. Sources caution that Scorsese would need to approve any take before development was to move forward. A prequel is not being ruled out, either. "Departed" is an adaptation of the Hong Kong pic 'Infernal Affairs,' to which Warners acquired the rights in 2003. The studio also had option rights to the movie's two sequels."

Martin Scorsese's mum's pepperoni pizza. Depends what you mean by simple. Ingredients --------------------------FOR THE SAUCE------------------------------- 1 1/2 c minced onion 3 tb olive oil 2 cn whole tomatoes; including -liquid, 1 ; coarsely chopped 1 ; (28 ounces each) 1 cn tomato sauce; (15 ounces) 1 ts dried basil; crumbled 1 cayenne pepper; to taste 1 sugar to taste 1 salt to taste 1 lb pizza dough; thawed -according to 1 ; package directions 1 ; if frozen 2 c grated mozzarella 1/4 c freshly grated parmesan; up -to 1/3 1/2 lb thinly sliced pepperoni Instructions Make the sauce: In a large saucepan set over moderate heat, cook the onion in the oil, stirring occasionally, for 5 minutes. Add the tomatoes, tomato sauce, basil, salt, cayenne, and sugar. Bring to a boil and simmer, covered, stirring occasionally, for 30 minutes. Preheat the oven to 400 degrees. Pat the dough into an oiled pan, sprinkle with the mozzarella, spreading it in an even layer, add the pepperoni and top it all with enough sauce to coat. (The sauce should be chunky.) Sprinkle with Parmesan cheese. Bake for 20 minutes, or until the crust is golden brown. Her son's films aren't bad either.

"I only ate my mom. I was saving dad for Thanksgiving." Any show that has a line like that can't be bad.

This prison drama from HBO with Winston Zedmore from Ghostbusters as the Governor and Mrs Soprano as a guard.

My mate's lent me the first season. He reckons its good stuff. Am I going to be wasting 8 hours of my life?

Apologies to Bob Dylan You must leave now, take what you need, its time you’d gone. For a people’s club it’s shocking to us how small you’ve grown. Take yer history, yer songs and yer shitty side. Cos we’re the only real team on Merseyside Look out Moyes the reds are comin' through And it's all over now, Bitter Blue. Kirby is for bluenoses, better use your sense. Take what you have gathered from coincidence. That Edna Everidge lookalike Bill Kenwright. He just can’t help from spouting loads of shite. In the table, too, we’re looking down on you. And it's all over now, Bitter Blue. Where’s the School of Science? They’re a fucking myth. And with your Dogs of War, you were takin the piss. You’ve had more fucking names than silverware But Kirby’s small, so you should do well out there. The People’s Club? We know that isn’t true. And it's all over now, Bitter Blue.

Nobody focks with the Jesus.

John Turturro in Miller's Crossing, Steve Buscemi in anything, McQueen in Tom Horn, the whole cast of Shawshank and Salif Diao in a Liverpool shirt.

http://www.bruce-campbell.com/ http://www.tvwavs.com/bcwavs/index.html

I'd say Nicholson's better. Cuckoo's nest, Shining and the Last Detail are all amazing films.

Dog Day Afternoon

Anyone seen Bubba Ho-Tep? Without a doubt the finest Elvis vs cowboy-boot-wearing Mummy film ever set in an old people's home. Bruce Campbell rules.

I've added a bit. Could still get another verse in there. Ground Control to David Moyes. Ground Control to David Moyes. Take your bitter pill And make that whining noise. Ground Control to David Moyes. Report to household goods and toys. Check the barcodes On your famous BOGOF boys. This is Ground Control to David Moyes. It’s true your club is small. And the papers want to know if you’re still there, ‘Cos your trophy room is looking rather bare. This is David Moyes to Ground Control, I just can’t sleep at night. But it’s not my fault we’re crap Let’s blame the red shite. For here am I sitting in the Tesco, Far from Goodison. Liverpool’s not blue And there’s fuck all I can do. (Ching-a-ching-a-ching-a-ching-ching! Ching-a-ching-a-ching-a-ching-ching!) Ground Control to David Moyes, You look braindead Can you make some noise? Can you hear me David Moyes? Can you hear me David Moyes? Can you… here am I sitting in the Tesco, Far from Goodison. Liverpool’s not blue And there’s fuck all I can do. (Ching-a-ching-a-ching-a-ching-ching! Ching-a-ching-a-ching-a-ching-ching!)

http://news.bbc.co.uk/sport1/hi/football/eng_prem/6356467.stm Winter reckons referees aren't good enough. Glad he noticed. Now fuck off back to Superstars.

Their worths must be based on some projected weight gain thing. Frank Spencer is a big lad isn't he, so it stands to reason that pound for pound he must cost more.

This was pre-Matrix, mate.

I thought Graham "Father Ted" Linehan's column was always good. The best thing was the mention that Lou Diamond Phillips wife allegedly ran away with another woman which was worked into every issue.

Dunno. Think lists like this might be the reason the mag itself died. They're just tryin to be contentious with a few of their choices.