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2018/19 Season Report Card - Andy Robertson

What more could Robbo have done this season? In terms of relentless, consistent quality, it might be the best season we’ve ever seen from a full back. Certainly since Stevie Nicol won the Player of the Year award back in the late 80s anyway.

 

That was the benchmark and no-one has ever really come close to matching it, until this year that is when you can argue that both Trent and Robbo were right up there with ‘Chico’.

 

Robbo’s consistency is just off the charts. He’s great every week. I genuinely can’t remember him ever having a bad game and he’s only had a few average ones. The rest of the time he ranges between excellent and sensational. You notice it more when he isn’t brilliant than when he is, because those rare occasions when he isn’t really stand out. And even then, he’s rarely (if ever) less than a 7 out of 10.

 

The only thing missing is the odd goal or two, because other than that he’s been close to perfection. Virgil gets all of the headlines and the awards, and deservedly so, but I ask again, what more could Robbo have done this year? The answer is pretty much nothing. But playing full back isn’t going to win you many awards. It’s not ‘sexy’ enough, although both Trent and Robbo have done a lot to change that this year.

 

As I said in Trent’s report card, these two have made playing full back cool. They’re the coolest full back pair since Cafu and Roberto Carlos. Kids in the playground want to be Alexander-Arnold or Robertson.

 

‘Robbo’ is my daughter’s favourite player. Most kids love the goalscorers. Salah is the most popular player in her school but when I asked her what t-short she wanted me to make her for the final, she immediately said “Andy Robbo” and wouldn’t be swayed. Not that I tried especially hard to sway her. She’s clearly got good taste.

 

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Robbo gets plenty of love from the fans and he’s had no shortage of credit from the media too. It’s not like he’s flown under the radar. Both he and Trent have had rave reviews from TV pundits, whether it’s the likes of Shearer and Lineker on MOTD, Ferdinand and Owen on BT or Carra and Neville on Sky. Their contributions haven’t gone unnoticed, and yet I can’t help but think that Robbo has been ever better than he’s generally been given credit for.

 

He was named in the ‘Team of the Season’ but based on performance level he should have been on the six man shortlist for ‘Player of the Year’. When the list was initially announced, I admit that even I wasn’t immediately put out by his absence. I think it’s because I just never even considered for a second that he would be on it, so it wasn’t a surprise. Forwards always get the attention for those things. You might get a truly outstanding midfielder in there too, and occasionally a dominant centre back, but full backs don’t get a sniff.

 

It was only when one of the lads in the group chat brought it up that it really hit me. I won’t mention who it was, because his ego is large enough as it is, but he was right. There’s no way you can make a serious argument that Robertson wasn’t one of the best six footballers in the league this year, but it’s sadly predictable that he wasn’t recognised for it.

 

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Left backs aren’t getting nominated ahead of an Eden Hazard or Bernardo Silva no matter how great they are. Being Scottish, extremely unassuming and humble, and having signed for a modest sum from relegated Hull probably doesn’t help either. 

 

He did get some lavish praise from the most unlikely of sources though. While he was still Manchester United manager, Jose Mourinho took the unusual step of singling out a Liverpool player for an outstanding performance.

 

“Liverpool play 200mph with and without the ball. I am still tired to look at Robertson. He makes a 100m sprint per minute! Incredible.”

 

While there was probably an ulterior motive for the comments (he was basically saying “look at your left back, he’s fit as a butcher’s dog, whereas mine looks like James Corden’s even fatter twin”), it was great hearing Robbo get such public acclaim from a man who wouldn’t normally do that.

 

Robertson is clearly the best left back in the league, he’s almost certainly the best left back in Europe and seeing as how all the best players are in Europe, that makes him probably the best left back in the world. 

 

He’s just relentless. Brilliant defensively, brilliant going forward, completely tireless in his running and he’s fiercely competitive and takes no crap from anyone. His running battle with Luis Suarez in the Nou Camp was great (apparently he was calling Suarez a big fat so and so when they clashed in the tunnel at half time) and the lack of deference he showed Messi at Anfield helped to set the tone for that entire night. Yeah, you might be the greatest player to have ever lived, but this is Anfield, son.

 

He’s also one of the nicest, most humble lads you could ever wish to have in your team. He’s dead funny and everyone at the club loves him. He’s only been here five minutes and he’s already up there with my favourite ever Reds. 

 

In the big games we’ve had he’s generally been sensational. Even when others may not have performed, he’s always brought his A game. That game in the Nou Camp was something else. I gave him 9 out of 10 in my ESPN ratings for that game (prompting an argument between Steve Nicol and some fella named Moreno, see below), but on reflection I should have given him ten. We lost 3-0 but none of the goals were anything to do with him, and it would have been an even heavier defeat without him.

 

 

The most iconic moment from that game for me was the late break Barca had from one of our corners. Messi led the charge, with Alba to his right and Suarez to his left. In their way? Just one man. Andy Robertson. The world’s greatest player with the ball at his feet and two team-mates flanking him, against a Scottish full back who two years earlier was fighting an unsuccessful relegation battle with Hull.

 

A goal seemed certain, but Robbo held Messi up as long as he could until he eventually chose to lay it off to Suarez, and as soon as he did that he turned on the after burners, closed him down and blocked the shot. It was one of the best moments of the entire season, and given what would happen a week later you can also argue it was one of the most important. If Robbo doesn’t snuff out that counter attack, there’s almost certainly no “number six” in the trophy cabinet.

 

Because he isn’t exotic, or flashy, or always drawing attention to himself on social media, he probably doesn’t get the recognition he deserves. He gets plenty, but considering how fantastic a player he is, his brilliance isn’t lauded enough as far as I’m concerned.

 

Andy Robbo is T-Bone Steak flavoured Roysters. Ok, I’ve lost you there, but stay with me as it will all make sense in a second. 

 

It’s only when you eat a pack of T-Bone Steak Roysters you realise “fuck me, these might actually be the best crisps out there”. They’re overlooked though, probably because you can buy six bags for a quid in Poundstretcher. People think, if you can get six packs for a quid there must be a reason for that.

 

Then you get Marks & Spencer charging £2 for a packet of crisps, and to justify it they give it a fancy name to make it sound exotic. “Four Cheese & Red Onion”. It’s still just cheese and onion!! Who do you think you’re fooling with that pretentious bollocks? Loads of people, as it turns out.

 

Don’t get me wrong, those Marks & Spencers crisps are good, but they can’t hold a candle to T-Bone Roysters despite the big difference in price and the fancy packaging.

 

Benjamin Mendy is one of those fancy, overpriced packets of Marks & Spencer crisps. Robbo is Roysters. Bought from an unfashionable outlet for a knockdown price, but the best value you’ll ever get for your money.

 

Best Moment:

 

Foiling the ‘three v one’, calling Suarez ‘fat’ at half time in the Nou Camp tunnel or giving Messi a clip round the ear. Take your pick, they were all iconic moments.

 

Worst Moment:

 

Being forced off at half time after being taken out by Suarez. It all turned out fine in the end, but for a little while it looked like Suarez had put one over on him and that would have stung him. In the end it didn’t matter, because Robbo is a European Champion.

 

Rating 10/10. 

 

Other than chipping in with a few goals I don’t know how he could improve on this.  

Edited by tlw content


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