buster69

That injury last night was an unbelievable bit of PR for Ronaldo. The amount of people that have come out in support of him since is incredible. With that and Messi's tax avoision case, it's been a great week for him. I wonder will he still be as popular in January when he wins the Ballon D'or "because he won the 2 biggest trophies"? Then he'll launch out a massive "Siiiii!!!!!" and people will remember "Ah yes, he's a cunt isn't he?"

Hamsik Dave? I thought he was up there with Zlatan on your "I've never seen him do it"-ometer?

Jonny Williams even. Jesus! I had a real Jon Walter there...

Just as an aside Dave, have you noticed what a weird looking individual Jonny Edwards is? He's like an overgrown dwarf. Enormous head but tiny body. I don't know if he's more Game of Thrones or Lord of the rings but it's freaking me out.

Fucking hell, I hate those fake quotes doing the rounds. They make fools of all of us. Well, they made fools of a lot of people. And now, me.

Apparently Kane asked the referee at half time if they were out if they lost. Any time I listened to one of his interviews I always thought he sounded like a dopey fucker. Perhaps this proves it.

Ah, Turkey aren't through to the next round Dave. It's Slovakia, Ireland, Portugal and Northern Ireland as the third place teams. And if you want to play two games a day, how about 8 games in 4 days. You know, maths... Just saying....

Can't believe I only found about this now. Just to prove how much of a cock Courtois is, he did a John Terry on De Bruyne http://www.dailymail.co.uk/sport/football/article-2839328/Kevin-Bruyne-s-ex-girlfriend-Caroline-Lijnen-reveals-cheated-Thibaut-Courtois.html P.S. When I say "A John Terry" I mean the girlfriend stealing bit. Not one of the countless other shit bastard things he's done.

What's with all the sudden appreciation for defenders Dave? I thought you were purely a Kevin Keegan/Ossie Ardiles, who gives a shit about defending it's all about the strikers kind of guy?

Sorry Gav. Yes I haven't gone to many games thus far. I will listen more intently in future.

Have to say as well Dave I'm really enjoying these reports. I can sometimes get a little depressed by the Liverpool reports, mainly because they remind me of how shit we are, but these are comic gold. Keep up the good work!

Speaking as an Irish man (and an Irish fan) I'm sorry to say we don't sing My Lovely Horse at the game. I will reccommend it for next time though What we were singing yesterday to the Swedes was "You're shit, but you're birds are fit" which is undeniably true. They didn't sing it about us though. Maybe because we're not shit? Or....

Great report Dave. The Switzerland "neutral" line was my favourite.

Great stuff as always Dave. Just a quick point on Jefferson Montero, I checked his stats on Wikipedia this week (yeah, I'm a sad bastard, big woo, want a fight about it?) His scoring record is one goal in 53 games for Swansea. For a winger! When you put it like that, Navas (4 goals in 97 games) and Ibe (1 goal in 41) look prolific.

Well the last time we had champions League football it completely screwed the first few months of the season. I know there were other factors involved as well (Suarez leaving, Balotelli coming, Sturridge being injured) Now I suppose Klopp may be able to juggle both competitions effectively but I think that with the squad we have now, if we played a full strength team every week we would be capable of winning the league. Leicester won it through having a settled team, playing one game a week all season, and I suppose, having a little bit of luck as well

Just wondering Dave if you would give up European football next year so we could try and have a title challenge a la 2014? When you look at Leicester this season, think it's no coincidence they did so well when they only played like 40 games in all competitions. If we had a clear run, think we would be able to make a really good title challenge. But not if we're playing 50-60 games.

Class round up, some great lines in there. I agree about Spurs Chelsea. "We don't want to see that kind of thing" Oh yes we fucking do! Another thing, aren't you going to be a bit sad when Louis, inevitably, gets the bullet in the summer? Particularly after they hire fucking Mourinho instead of him.

I prefer Claude on Ty on Arsenal fan TV Claude: "That is rubbish! Wake up and smell the fucking coffee!" Ty: "Where's the coffee? Where's the coffee?"

Am I the only who thinks that Arsenal TV presenter looks like Wes Morgan?

Dave, just wondering what's your opinion on the Jon Flanagan situation. Signed a three year contract, played against Southampton then hasn't played since. Now he's behind Randall in the pecking order? Is he carrying a knock or not? I'll admit I have him in my fantasy football team so I have a vested interest....

Just on the Van Gaal point Dave it seems a strong case of Wengeritis. He has them frothing at the mouth most of the time and then all of a sudden pulls a result out of nowhere to make them think "well, maybe". Hope he stays on there. Either that or give Giggs the job, that would be good too.

Also think it's fair to say that the fan protest mid season had a galvanizing effect, particularly when the owner's relented and froze their prices. It's helped the supporters get closer to the club again.

But Dave, you said you wanted the season to end after we lost the cup final.... I'm like a broken record about that, but I will say one other thing, it's only a couple of weeks ago since these players conceded three goals in the second half to lose a league game, so they owed us that second half. The fact that it came in a European night at Anfield makes it all the sweeter though.

Dave, you do know Dwight Gayle is related to Howard Gayle who used to play for us? Doesn't make you feel a twinge more affection for him? Also, this reminds me of Wilshere https://www.google.it/search?q=clean+shirt+peep+show&biw=1366&bih=677&source=lnms&tbm=isch&sa=X&sqi=2&ved=0ahUKEwjQjans7PzLAhWHchQKHaioDbIQ_AUIBigB#imgrc=kAIg0M0a5UaZjM%3A