Bruce Spanner

Send any one of our midfielders to do it for you, that way it won't be injured when you're no longer annoyed.

They'd never find their way!

Well that was dispiriting!

I'm going to go home and kick the dog now.

He really is a fat useless bastard.

A Wayne's a touch portly as well!

Cloakrooms this way yeah?

We are THREE points off fourth, with the inevitable Southampton fall off still to come it's wide open; fuck only knows how!

We have a LOT of players who couldn't play any worse if they fucking tried, so they have to improve.

We have, potentially, a great manager learning the ropes with us. Who has shown tactical innovation; as seen by the amount of teams, and Owls, copying his formations/tactics.

We have just lost one of the best players in a generation and we are waiting for someone, anyone, to grow a fucking set and man up and start dragging some results out; I'm not looking to Gerrard. 

Manchester United are fucking terrible! They have no fit/quality defenders until they can try and buy themselves out of trouble in January and we all know about 'bedding in periods'; if this doesn't work they are financially fucked. Genuinely I reckon they'll finish 6th/7th, as they are fucking terrible apart from the front four.

We are still, godonlyknowshow, still well and truly in it and a turn in form has to come, because we can't possibly get any worse with the genuine quality we have running through the team. It will happen, it has to, as we are not this bad! Not a chance.

We're getting fucking bummed by Real though, but we'll get out of the group, probably...

Shamelessly stolen, but, mais, whatchayagonnado?

In Italy all the arabs sold on the streets was them and these fucking splat toys. fuck off and sell me a carpet or some hashish aladdin you backward boat trippin toes out cunt

 

And really, I mean obscenely, fucking dim.

If that Lamella 'Worldie' hand't have gone in I would have been brained that the cheeky, under performing, agent agitating, shit haircutted prick for having the fucking gaul to try that after being shite for so long! 

He'd be playing with the reserves until January until he's shipped out to a Russian second division team who play beyond the Tundra.

I've just watched my team go up against one of the best teams, currently, in the world!

I'm fucking loving this!

Last time we hammered them, this time they got the better of us. I can't wait 'til next time.

So all you miserable cunts, fuck off and chase glory. I'm here for all the ups and downs!

No, but this bloated, blubber fleshed fucker must be running out of excuses...

Are the chickens  coming home to roost for 'arry and people are wising up to the chancer* and financial catastrophe he's been with several clubs?

*I'm sure he'll console himself with the millions he's stolen!

Andre Schurrle and Carolina Kluft.

Nah...

I very much doubt that. 

These clauses are thrown in all the time; playing time, position, rest, promo leave etc...

Don't let common sense get in the way of a professional footballers, coupled with his agents whim, contract negotiations. 

Heard today, reliable fella, that as part of Johnson's last contract he, or rather his agent, had a clause inserted that 'If fit, he plays' and that there were sanctions, extra cash, if this was broken.

That's some retarded, numbskull, fuckwittery if true.

He's going nowhere, not for the foreseeable future anyway.

He'd sink at a club like Real, Barce or the petriod clubs as we HAVE to look after him as he's what we cling to, whereas they wouldn't.

Raheem is good, but he's not that good...yet.

He'll be here, I think, for a few seasons before he seriously starts thinking.

I like Ian Wright, or at least I don't mind him. Unusually among pundits, he seems to enjoy both the game and the gig.

Edit: every now and then Paul 'The fucking spastic wanker Guv'ner' Ince is out'. He's a cunt on both levels!

He's just a mouth piece for somebody else *taps nose*

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9pZ7qmAFltg

I love the look on his face 'Is tha fuckin thang on?' 

Like a dog having the concept of Belgium explained to it.

Just kick it and be done with it!

Gaz Bale seen out with his buzzes last night...

Wankers.

Last Sundays...

Beef; pink and butter like to chew on.

Roasters; over baked in garlic, thyme and shredded in a colander until every last sinew of it crisps.

Beetroot; over roasted in honey, orange and thyme.

Asparagus; wrapped in Parma Ham and griddle to finish.

Mash;  oven roasted with cheddar, garlic, basil and loads of salt.

Broccoli; laced with smoked sea salt.

Gravy; made with Boudreaux, red onion and stock.

All washed down with industrial quantities of vin rouge and Gin.

Monday was difficult!

Was quite compatant a few years back; a few comps and whatnot, but then I turned up at a 'select' event, christ only knows why.

Sat watching these machines belt the living shit out of each other for an hour or so until my name was called...30 seconds I lasted against a Thai fighter who actually toyed with me! I've never known anyone as aggressive or fast.

He got pasted in the next round, small consolation I suppose, but I dread to think how hard the other cunt was.

Moral, don't talk cheese with the French, sausages with the Germans, tax with the Swiss or kickboxing with the Thai's.

Awww look at that, it's a joke from 2007

Awww, look at that...it's a bloke who wants so badly to watch some pissed, overweight, sad, insecure schlepper get smashed by a load of rahtard rugger sorts that he clicked a link.

Your move!

CLICK.

Enjoy, ya freak!

They've sang about us for roughly 87% of the game.

Retards.