Qwikage

Nothing To Envy: Real Lives In North Korea ; Barbara Demick.

Really good read and scary in parts.

It really is no big deal.

When i got mine done we were working on a refurb directly across the road from the hospital.Op was at 10.00. I went into work first thing..nipped across to hospital and was back at work for lunchtime.

Don't sweat it dude.

I am no tree hugger but fuck me this is scary.

https://twitter.com/nowthisnews/status/928792093182398465

I think one side is louder than the other for some odd reason.

That's so you can't hear the subliminal messages being played through the quiet one (have you seen our new phone yet?).

First time i ever cooked for she he who must be obeyed i tried this. 

Here's one of the new scenes from that movie...

 

Nah i can still see him....aint he the fag?

I'll get my coat!

Is anyone even mildly shocked at the revelations the Paradise Papers are throwing up!!

That does not mean it does not anger me , it boils my piss.

However no matter how apopletic I, or indeed any of us get, the square root of fuck all will be done about it. Doubtless there will be MP's of all colours getting splinters on arses jumping on the latest badwagon rolling into town and regailing us with soundbite after soundbite of righteous indignation.

Our press will start the crusade for "the man in the street" in the hope that it deflects attention from the fact that half of the fucking owners of their shitrags are using these very avoidance techniques themselves.

Disgusted of chipping norton types will regale us all with their best spellchecked letters to the broadsheets explaining how we should be grateful that these wealthy few keep all us prolls in work and we should be gratefull for it. As if the tax we pay on our labours comes from the very pockets of these parasites themselves.

Once the dust has settled (as it surely will) this will continue in another form.

Meanwhile at a personal independance payment interview near you.......

She is too weak to sack the perverts in her cabinet, Savile would be schools minister if were still alive, 

Given that Boris Johnson is Foreign Secretary anything is possible with this lot. 

Thalidomide - Short hand typist.

There used to be a pub called the Flying Scotsman just along from Kings Cross in London. There was a small room just off to the side of the bar where you were able to drink your pint whilst a young lady removed her clothing on a very small stage.

It was what you would call an intimate space in that if you got in early enough you could get a spot right next to the stage and would literally be within inches of various minges. 

One day some chap decided if it was that close he might as well touch it. No sooner had he laid a hand upon it when this old woman with a face like she had been bobbing for chips grabbed him and slapped him across the face screaming "don't you touch my fucking girls". He took exception to this and went to hit her back whereupon he was set about by around a dozen locals. 

His lifeless body was the unceremoniously dumped outside for passers by to walk over. 

Next girl came on and calmness was restored.

We used to refer to it as the burger bar.

Can't find any original pics as it is now burned down. Aurthur Thompsons old haunt known locally as the Stab Inn.

After a couple of bottles of Old English Sherry my mates and i decided it would be a good idea if went over to this place to see if it was as bad as they siad it was.

Seven of us trooped over, took one look at the outside and shat seven colours of shite and legged it.

Is anyone here a professional in employment law and willing to help our a mate of mine who's just been sacked with zero notice (in contradiction to the employee handbook) in a small employer?  Just hoping to pass on an email address to the girl who's distraught

Paulie, a few things to get you prepared for ACAS meeting suggested by others.

• Copy of contract of employment (should show start date)
• Copy of Employee handbook: to show relevant breach
• Old payslips (to demonstrate salary and allow calculation of severance pay amount if entitled)

If they have been in continuous employment for a minimum of 2 years it is actually difficult to sack someone now without the correct procedures being followed, which this employer appears to have ignored. Do you know if she had a dismissal letter or disciplinary meeting?

I hope it all goes well for your mate. 

"What the fuck are you looking at!!" - she says

"It's just a football forum pet"  - I said

"You must think I'm a fuckin idiot" - she says

You can hardly see the bruises now.

Thanks Crouchie, Thank you very much indeed. 

 

Shoplifting For Dummies.

 

Chapter 1 - Getting Started -- Woolworth's Pick-n-mix.

And that Mr Mignolet is how you keep goal sir.

If our coaching staff and manager do not see how badly we are being served by some of the people on that pitch, and that the current system is not working, then they clearly are not as good as they think they are.

To be fair 3-1 does not flatter Spurs.

Poccetino clearly has us sussed. The majority of their attacking is being targeted at Lovren and Moreno.

Couthinio looks like he's having a training session. Doing what the hell he likes when he likes.

Apparently it was on health grounds. He is suffering from chronic constipation.

It's his twelfth night without a Richard the third.

Here it is. Mr dickhead of Swansea( mind you, it could be a shit attempt at sarcasm)...... his mathematics is also shite. 

 

Absolutely no sarcasm involved in this quote Pistonbroke. I used to enjoy reading the comments on the BBC HYS articles. At times it could be entertaining and occasionally informative. Now its just litany after litany of how "we have voted out so out we go" shite and "we want our country back" imbecility. 

These "patriots" infect just about every HYS now.

If ever the case needs to be made for compulsory frontal lobotomy i would use some of these comments as evidence,

Alan Coren 69 for 1. Laugh out loud writing. 

What a pic. There is so much about that pic which suggests old school.

Very few motors.

The random dog that used to follow us kids everywhere we went and no one knew who it belonged to.

The shirts with huge collars.

The me and my bird tags on the walls.

The complete lack of designer trainers. 

Had to go on live chat tonight and they practically did say fuck off. Said they can't do a thing until Liverpool contact them because they're the retailer which baffled me. After much back and forth they're convinced I've signed for it, and they even had the fucking nerve to disconnect the live chat by saying bye and turning it off in a millisecond.

Furmedge, if you paid for it by debit card try phoning your bank and asking them to do a chargeback. They are not actually legally obliged to do so but some of the banks will and then pursue it on your behalf.

Hope it works out for you.