Qwikage

1 hour ago, Bjornebye said:

I like my steak medium rare and don't mind if it's more towards rare but fuck me that's been flashed for 10 seconds either side by the looks of it. I'm surprised it's not eating the lettuce. 

 

And how the fuck did you cut that with a regular knife and not a steak knife? 

 

 

I like mine on the rare side as well but a good vet would get that fucker back on its feet.

12 minutes ago, Josef Svejk said:

He's been shit at Barcelona. 

Barcelona have been shit at Barcelona.

11 minutes ago, Bjornebye said:

This cunt

 

 

 

 

He was on 5 live this morning slabbering the same pish. If I found the likes of him or Johnson, lying in a pool of blood in the middle of the road, I would need a hip replacement by the time I finished kicking them. 

He is a Rolls Royce of a player and I would have him in our team whenever available. Is he a relaible as Wjinaldum? No. Is he a better player than Winjaldum? Undoubtedly in my opinion.

Injury record or not, we are a much better team with him on the pitch and anyone who suggests getting rid of him needs to give their head a wobble.

Ask yourself this, we are 1-0 down against a team with 30 mins left. We can subsitute Thiago, Milner, Ox , Keita, Jones or dare I say Fabhino. Of those,  who is more likley to find a pass in the final third?

32 minutes ago, VladimirIlyich said:

It was a yellow all day.

It gave a shit ref, who was having a shit game, the opportunity to make yet another shit decison.

If any spurs player had done that to one of mine, I would have expected a red card.

I adore Robbo but it was a bad decision. Klopp was correct, as usual.

Oh, and Kane is a cunt!

1 minute ago, fungus said:

Is Robertson's only move a chip straight into the defender?

This aged well.

Slab head at £80m.

Nat Philips at £15m.

Could be a double post incoming. The shitness of modern football.

I am by no means a paragon of virtue but, I feel Boris has made me a worse person!

For the first time in my life, I wish someone harm.

I despise Boris. But not as much as I despise the Conservative party.

This smacks of a Tory party in self preservation mode. The leaks, the breifings , the sacrificail lamb. This is a premedicated attempt to wash away all of the shit show of the last two and a half years and have a true blue knight in blue passport cloloured armour to ride in and save the country by way of a new leader.

Or perhaps I am just cynical.

10 minutes ago, dockers_strike said:

 

Think all UK boosters are Pfizer?

They are not mate. 

Had mine last week and it was Moderna. 

Thankfully no side effects such as the sore arm I had getting the Pfizer.

2 hours ago, Bjornebye said:

Christ. Glad you’re ok. Did you get your end away? 

Not that night, but fortunately we had previously done that pre marraige thing - had sex during the day when it was still daylight, we were both sober and it was not a special occasion.

7 hours ago, Bob Spunkmouse said:

Has anyone ever technically died?

My heart stopped twice so technically yes.

Was going out with a girl who worked for Stakis Hotels which meant we got to stay in any hotel in the uk for £10 a night including all meals.

Went for a weekend in Manchester and ate in the hotel. Thought I would be very cosmopolitan and ordered the escargot. Turns out I am allergic and had a had an anaphylactic reaction. Last thing I remembered was lying in the foyer with the manager asking her to take me back to the room a I was upseting the residents.

I have no idea what happened after that but she told me my heart stopped twice and they brought me back until somebody twigged what it was and admistered the right drugs.

Spent six days in hospital and have not been back.

This is not mine, but only dogs bring this amount of joy.

This ref is going to send someone off tonight. Need to make sure it's not one of ours.

Lived in Helensburgh for many years. Met him many times and saw him about town regularly. Always seemed happy to talk to anyone who asked for his time, even those from the other side of the divide which made him well respected locally.

A decent human being.

If i know i am going to have a sesh i do the following:

eat cheese, before or during - it helps absorb the alcohol

cup of tea before you go to bed - force yourself even if you don't want it

Irn Bru - only the genuine stuff because it works.

The only caveat to the above is Single Malt. Drink enough of that and no matter what you do, you will have to write off the next day.

Like him or laothe him, Ronaldo is a born winner and will vastly improve any team he plays for. The impact he wil have in the Utd dresing room will far outweigh any incompetence gollum brings to the team.

There is some real quality in that squad, which has to date, been mismanged by golloum. Their squad might well win in spite of gollum and not because of him.

Anyone who is trying to convince themsleves that they will not challenge for the league needs to give their head a wobble.

Ferguslie Park in Paisley (around 30 years ago) was the most deprived place I have ever been. What few local shops there were, were boarded up but stiil open, one even had a bouncer on the door!!

Burnt out cars all over the place, rubbish everywhere, absolutely nothing in the way of civic amenities.

They spent an absolute fortune knocking down a load of the older housing stock but failed yet again to provide a focal point for the community. Everyone in faux shock that it failed again!

9 hours ago, Bjornebye said:

Parkhead area. Rough as fuck round there. 

Had a lot of family who stayed in Tollcross. Whilst the residents could never be descibed as well heeled, I never felt threatened and people were mostly sound. Very little in the way of commnity facilties though.

1. Danny McGrain.

2. Cafu.

3. Lillian Thuram.

In my humble opinion McGrain is streets ahead of the other 2, but he will never get the recognition he deserves because he did not play for a "big" continental team.

This is ridiculous. Utterly effortless.

Under the Consumer rights act 2015 you have 30 days from purchase to reject the goods as not fit for purpose and you can demand a refund.

This may be a pain in the arse, but if you are up for a scrap (I'm Scottish so it's genetic) take it back to the shop and tell them you wish to reject the laptop as not fit for puspose, listing the faults. Remind them they have a leagl obligation unedr the act I mentioned above to refund you as the goods are less than 30 days old. They will try and bullshit you with the excuse that she has activated windows so they are unable to accept it as a return. This is a common argument, and the law states that this is an acceptable action if it is required to establish the goods are in working order.

If this does not work there are a number of other avenues but keep a note of the store, the time and the person you spoke to and I can let you know the next options.

Do not go to Acer yet mate as this is this mobs modus operandi and they rely on people eventually giving up.

How long has she had it?

2 minutes ago, Bjornebye said:

Are you thinking shit in an envelope as well? 

You've been drinking the same beers as me. Is it great minds think alike or fools seldom differ?

Lee, did she buy it online or in store?

Don't go to Acer. Your contract is with Argos so don't allow theh to muddy the waters and pass the buck.