UnwelcomeinPeru

I wouldn't want to come across as shallow but I also thought Vida looked ridiculous. If Legolas shagged Prince Charles that's how I imagine their child would look.

The fact that we let 9 points go down with the bottom three has a lot to do with us not finishing where we should have done. Vote of Thanks: these reports are a Friday highlight, usually the cue for a mid-afternoon Americano and a sugared doughnut. Thank you for them all.

In a similar vein I'd be interested to know where Ronan Keating was 9 months before Karius was born.

You have to wonder what kind of a world we live in when a stand up lad like Ox gets an injury that rules him out of a Champions League final and a world cup while those two cunts are still standing doing silly handshakes. Amen to that. If there was a Wankers Olympics...

I stopped reading at the part where Sam Allardyce uses his moobs to provide breast relief.

'Pep' has come in for criticism recently but one thing you can't take him to task for is his controlled outswingers, which he uses very effectively before bringing one back into the batsman's pads.

If someone could suggest a French translation for 'cockwomble' I can explain to my colleagues why I am laughing so much.

Nope, can't think of one.

Aldo was a 25 or 30 goals a season man and we won stuff when he was here so I can see where he’s coming from. I seem to remember that he had Barnes and Beardsley laying 4 or 5 on a plate for him each game. In fairness he has never denied how jammy he was to be playing in that team.

Chelsea fans never cease to appall. You have never seen it all with these people.

Suggest you that one cannot apply polish to excreted waste?

Yes - the problem is proportionality. The sanction for a foul in the penalty area in most cases is way out of sync with the offence. A penalty is a free hit at 190 square feet of goal from dead centre. Few penalties result from fouls that deny the attacking team that opportunity, and many result from 'fouls' where there was little or no opportunity to score a goal: in fact the only 'opportunity' is to induce a foul. I am not sure what the alternative is though.

Maybe it's more to do with parasitic agents than the players. Agents don't give a toss about their clients' interests, just the fees the players generate for them. Keep them quiet with a few well-disguised backhanders and 'fees' for contract extensions (which simply serve to inflate a player's value) and the job is done. The only way that FPP can work is for there to be a central clearing house for transfer fees and for agents to be paid directly (and only) by their player clients. So none.

Andy Awford.

I didn't quite see the Wijnaldum substitution the same way. It looked like we were open down the left all game - Zappacosta was aside from Hazard the main threat. Moreno was getting drawn inside a lot to cover the extra men they had coming through the middle, which gave Zappacosta a lot of space. He had a good dig in the first half and there were a couple of crosses in the second half which should have been converted.GW made it a lot tighter down that side. I thought a point against the Champions, given that it was pretty much their first team, and the players they were able to bring on, was a decent result. It was a poxy goal though and I can't stand Willian. I thought Azpilicueta was very good - much better than I realised.

Salah Coutinho Lovren

Mo's second goal reminded me of one Fowler banged in away at Charlton a few years ago (the game that wrapped up a CL place I think). Belter.

That Tavares lad they had playing up front looked out of sorts. It was almost as if someone had taken the music away.

That Tavares lad they had playing up front looked out of sorts. It was almost as if someone had taken the music away.

I’d like him to come and meet us if there is.

‘One should not aim at being possible to understand but at being impossible to misunderstand‘

Apart from that Mrs Lincoln did you enjoy the play?

I take the blame for their goal, I said to my other half 'after that Payet free kick last year he won't be throwing any more of these in'.

Was there a single person in the ground - including the players - who didn't think that penalty would cost us? It felt as bad as letting one in.

Sam Allardyce taking over at Arsenal.