Evelyn Tentions

In a surprising move FIFA has actually acted and banned this throwback from all football for 90 days while they hold an inquiry. Also nice to see some of the men's team speaking up for her

At least twice Spuds players waved imaginary cards at the tyro ref who ignored it. At least PGMOL are consistent. Consistently useless.

A couple of old Australian ones. Tired and emotional Pissed as a parrot, used in the past for politicians. A well known racing identity. Major underworld figure

Fuck it. Enough is enough. Tentions law will now be rigorously applied.

Weight and height apparently self reported. One of these is fake, apparently (again) the court hasn't yet released his mugshot.

6ft 3, 215 lb? I'm 5ft 11 and 208lb and nowhere near as obese as Trump. I wonder how he arranged that?

Bring the club into disrepute. If the Scums lawyers can't find a reason, they need better lawyers.

In a fan's season report in the Grauniad at the end of last season, he was voted flop of the season

According to the Beeb we've had an offer of 30 million knocked back for Andre. Why can't the low balling cunts just pay the 40 million release clause if they want him. If we could have forked out on Caceido, 40m is chicken feed especially since he'd only be paid half of what we would have have to offer Caceido.

I guess it's just a shadenfreude Sunday

They might not be corrupt but they are certainly inconsistent at best, tending towards biased and incompetent most matches.

Ahem. Tierney.

Digestive system like an industrial incinerator

Was that the one he was selling autographed Bibles at?

Apparently The Beatles asked for tickets to an FA Cup final, Shankly coyly replied, telling them “I’ve never seen any of The Beatles standing on The Kop. Any ticket I have spare will be going to my mates on The Kop”

Your Nan must have been mates with my Mum, but her preferred epithet was poncy cheese on toast.

No. He's still 5 ft 8.

The thing I've noticed most is that the standard of officiating is light years ahead of Webb and his cohort of clowns.

You've been to Vietnam then?

In Shanklys days NOBODY had the horrible littles fuckers on a fry up.

Shouldn't be allowed until the first lean photo is posted

If Chelsea do lob in a higher offer, Brighton should be made aware that FSG will set the lawyers on them and nobody will allowed to play him until it's settled in about 2027.

Show him a picture of the Kop after the Barca 4 - 0 and a photo of the Chelsea pensioners waving plastic flags. Your choice Moises.

While he's there, give him a walletectomy, pass it on to the boss

Fucking hell. Let's get this window out of the way before we start panicking about January.