Trumo

The country is called eSwatini now (yes the lower case 'e' comes first). Also, Czech Republic is now called Czechia.

He no Matthias, Son of Deuteronomy of Gath.

The club are on an island of one anytime we try to point out a flaw in the system.

Mitch McConnell regretting laying his hands on that plasma ball.

Only just about halfway through the season, and we are no better than about 4 or 5 other clubs this season. A couple of mitigating circumstances for that which couldn't (reasonably) have been vouched for, but their are other issues. Namely that important areas of the team are not functioning nearly as effectively as in the past. We look a lot less dynamic all round. I don't think Klopp has ever had a game against the Mancs where we've performed outstandingly well AND deservedly taken them to the cleaners. Even in those 2 league wins in the last couple of years, the scorelines were much closer than the performances suggested. At their place, we've always been shit bar an hour or so in a Europa League game. The forwards all look out of form, and we don't have the back-ups to change it. Taki is an attacking midfielder, Diogol is injured and Big Div just looks disinterested all the time. If someone from midfield could pick up the attacking slack, it would help. At the moment, the final ball and the goal attempts look hesitant and hopeful.

The 1-1 draw in this fixture last season stopped us from completing the season with a 100% home record. We took the lead through a powerful header from Robbo, but we weren't clinical enough in the final third. We conceded an equaliser from a set piece which should have been ruled out for offside. Andre Marriner was the ref and he seemed intent on letting Burnley be as physical and time-wasty as they liked. The first time we played this lot in the PL was at Anfield in September 2009. Owen Coyle was their manager and they'd just been promoted and had actually beaten Man Utd in the league too. We were comfortable though, winning 4-0 thanks to a Yossi hat-trick and a goal from Dirk. It was to be a poor season with the team at its erratic and inconsistnt worst in the post-Xabi era. Things were worse off the pitch with the shit cunt owners digging their heals in and the club haemhorraging millions of pounds in interest payments on the loan used as leverage on the club. It was the season we ended up with Martin Broughton as chairman, looking for a buyer urgently. As much as we don't like a lot of what we are seeing at the moment, just imagine how much worse it was then. The goals are from 2:35 onwards: Jay-Z topped the charts on that same day with 'Run This Town' along with his mates Kanye West and Rihanna. They've all done much better stuff than this. Last season we really did 'run this town', if you say 'this town' was the PL. A lot has gone awry since then, and we badly need to get back on track. We are averaging less than 2 points per game at the moment, and obviously way down on last season's near-perfection at this stage. We practically know what Burnley are going to do, but we must find a way to be less predictable ourselves. The lack of centre backs is one thing, but the attack looking nothing like the unit of the past 3 seasons is hampering us badly because we are not looking creative, incisive or clinical at all. That has to be fixed as soon as possible.

How hot is my house? Well I've got a semi.

Bit of a problem with Luiz when he stands on a bloody rake.

34C. Just the right size and firmness.

Started reading that and wondered if Dennis Tooth hadn't already posted it on the GF before.

Uruguay in 2014.

Paulie's missus a bit of a slave driver then?

Other truck drivers have to keep a stash in their cab. She just has to look down.

As Brick Top would say about the Colonel:

Harsh on onions that.

Nil Butch Nisi Sundance. Fuego! *bang*

America will never run out of shysters.

I bet you looked like a massive tit.

Phil Twats Ned In Punxsutawney.

Open a new plastic bag.

Malaga.

The Lonsdale Lounge.

Jonny Wilkinson's drop goal.

Barrier around the grindstone.