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Ezekiel 25:17

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Everything posted by Ezekiel 25:17

  1. Ezekiel 25:17

    Fao TOM R

    Alrite mate, Reckon this bird took a bit of stick ? ( fifth row, far right) http://www.office-humour.co.uk/pop.cfm?link=http://www.electraisd.net/alumni/1993_seniors.htm
  2. Ezekiel 25:17

    Roman's spendings

    Whats the score with his coat Tom ?
  3. Ezekiel 25:17

    Fao TOM R

    I love the way they had a choice of sitting or lying aswell.
  4. Ezekiel 25:17

    Fao TOM R

    lovin that roly poly Caleb Simon from last year, wearin a red an white top so you might be fooled in to thinkin he was on the team like them two dorks on the bottom row.
  5. Ezekiel 25:17

    Fao TOM R

    d'oh !
  6. Ezekiel 25:17

    New film releases

    Check these bad boys out, (actual porn movies) ive seen the originals but i reckon these may be better. Edwards Penishands Lord of the Asses Dude, Where’s My Dildo? Big Trouble in Little Vagina Brassiere to Eternity Moulin Splooge Willy Wanker and the Fudge Packing Factory Shaving Ryan’s Privates Forrest Hump Romancing the Bone E-Three: The Extra Testicle
  7. Ezekiel 25:17

    New film releases

    A few more classics.... Pump Friction The Sperminator A Clockwork Orgy Forrest Hump Inspect Her Gadget Glad-He-Ate-Her Lord of the G-strings Chitty Chitty Gang Bang
  8. Ezekiel 25:17

    You know you grew up in the 80's if..

    Think maybe this was aimed at girls (apologies all). (especially to those who are relating to most of it).
  9. Ezekiel 25:17

    Joke de Jour

    A young lads standing on the corner smokin, so a fella stops an says, christ lad how old are you ? the kid replies ten, ten and your smoking ! the kid says oh I yeh iv been smoking for about two years now, but thats nothin that, i lost me virginity last night, the fella totally shocked says come on your havin me on, you had sex last night, the kid replies yeh three times, fuckin hell lad, what was it like then ? the kid says, cant rememeber mate i was fuckin pissed again !
  10. Ezekiel 25:17

    Anelka

    Theres something a bit Kirkland/Dudek signing about it all.
  11. Ezekiel 25:17

    Best Ever Butty...........................

    Is right Tom it was your Dad who got me into them, he used to always bring them down, might have to pick up a packet on the way home.
  12. Ezekiel 25:17

    Best Ever Butty...........................

    no way best ever butty, is two massive pieces of bread (cut by your good self) a shit load of grated cheese all over an a load of chopped up Hot dog sausages (not those cheap ass 8 in a can jobs) am talkin proper geman in a platic packet i cant fucken open things, lash it under the grill till you reach your desired level of melted heaven.
  13. Offal site says its defo on.
  14. Ezekiel 25:17

    Hate mail from a blue...

    you should of replied with 'oooh me grapes are killin me' It was Mel B from Bo selecta who emailed wasnt it ?
  15. Ezekiel 25:17

    Wright-Phillips

    nice one, he was once likened to a pit bull by his ex school teacher, well i actually just made that shit up by i bet it aint far from the truth.
  16. Ezekiel 25:17

    Wright-Phillips

    On the subject of Brothers (not the proverbial black man) didnt United take the younger Rooney aswell, from what iv heard an the little iv seen hes as good as anythin around for his age.
  17. Ezekiel 25:17

    Wright-Phillips

    Davey Thommo rules, Remeber Dave when he was walkin through the Main stand car park on his phone an i heard him say 'No am still at fuckin Coventry arnt i' fuckin class, he said in an interview aswell hed love to be back at liverpool an stilll goes the game when he can, an who could deny him the peach he scored against us on his return (especially as we still won) oh yeh an quality use of the word dime Milan.
  18. Ezekiel 25:17

    BEST EVER Movie Quote

    Far an away the best scene in the movie. JULES I will never forgive your ass for this shit. This is some fucked-up repugnant shit! VINCENT Did you ever hear the philosophy that once a man admits he's wrong, he's immediately forgiven for all wrong-doings? JULES Man, get outta my face with that shit! The motherfucker who said that never had to pick up itty- bitty pieces of skull with his fingers on account of your dumb ass. VINCENT I got a threshold, Jules. I got a threshold for the abuse I'll take. And you're crossin' it. I'm a race car and you got me in the red. Redline 7000, that's where you are. Just know, it's fuckin' dangerous to be drivin' a race car when it's in the red. I could blow. JULES You're gettin' ready to blow? Well I'm a mushroom-cloud-layin' motherfucker! motherfuck Every time my fingers touch brain I'm "SUPERFLY T.N.T," I'm the "GUNS OF NAVARONE." I'm what Jimmie Walker usta talk about. In fact, what the fuck am I doin' in the back? You're the motherfucker should be on brain detail. We're tradin'. I'm washin' windows and you're pickin' up this ni****'s skull.
  19. Ezekiel 25:17

    Evertons top class replacement

    When interviewed over the injury to Martyn, Moyes came back with 'yes its a problem but luckily for us we have a top class replacement.... Richard Wright- 135 minutes on the pitch- 7 goals conceded I think its time they used there top class replacement whoever that may be.
  20. Three convicts were on the way to prison. They were each allowed to take one item with them to help them occupy their time while incarcerated. On the bus, one turned to another and said, "So, what did you bring?" The second convict pulled out a box of paints and stated that he intended to paint anything he could. He wanted to become the "Grandma Moses of Jail". Then he asked the first, "What did you bring?" The first convict pulled out a deck of cards and grinned and said, "I brought cards. I can play poker, solitaire and gin, and any number of games." The third convict was sitting quietly aside, grinning to himself. The other two took notice and asked, "Why are you so smug? What did you bring?" The guy pulled out a box of tampons and smiled. He said "I brought these." The other two were puzzled and asked - "What can you do with those?" He grinned and pointed to the box and said - "Well according to the box, I can go horseback riding, para gliding, roller-skating"...
  21. Ezekiel 25:17

    101 things not to say during sex

    But everybody looks funny naked! You woke me up for that? Did I mention the video camera? Do you smell something burning? (in a janitor's closet) And they say romance is dead... Try breathing through your nose. A little rug burn ever hurt anyone! Is that a Medic-Alert Pendant? Sweetheart, did you lock the back door? But whipped cream makes me break out. Person 1: This is your first time..right? Person 2: Yeah.. today (in the No Tell Motel) Hurry up! This room rents by the Hour! Can you please pass me the remote control? Do you accept Visa? ZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZ On second thought, let's turn off the lights. And to think - I was really trying to pick up your friend! So much for mouth-to-mouth. (using body paint) Try not to leave any stains, okay? Hope you're as good looking when I'm sober... (holding a banana) It's just a little trick I learned at the zoo! Do you get any premium movie channels? Try not to smear my make-up, will ya! (preparing to use peanut butter sexually) But I just steam-cleaned this couch! Got any penicillin? But I just brushed my teeth... Smile, you're on Candid Camera! I thought you had the keys to the handcuffs! I want a baby! So much for the fulfillment of sexual fantasies! (in a menage a trois) Why am I doing all the work? Maybe we should call Dr. Ruth... Did you know the ceiling needs painting? I think you have it on backwards. When is this supposed to feel good? Put that blender back in the kitchen where it belongs! You're good enough to do this for a living! Is that blood on the headboard? Did I remember to take my pill? Are you sure I don't know you from somewhere? I wish we got the Playboy channel... That leak better be from the waterbed! I told you it wouldn't work without batteries! But my cat always sleeps on that pillow.. Did I tell you my Aunt Martha died in this bed? If you quit smoking you might have more endurance.. No, really... I do this part better myself! It's nice being in bed with a woman I don't have to inflate! This would be more fun with a few more people.. You're almost as good as my ex! Do you know the definition of statutory rape? Is that you I smell or is it your mattress stuffed with rotten potatoes? You look younger than you feel. Perhaps you're just out of practice. You sweat more than a galloping stallion! They're not cracker crumbs, it's just a rash. Now I know why he/she dumped you... Does your husband own a sawed-off shotgun? You give me reason to conclude that foreplay is overrated. What tampon? Have you ever considered liposuction? And to think, I didn't even have to buy you dinner! What are you planning to make for breakfast? I have a confession... I was so horny tonight I would have taken a duck home! Are those real or am I just behind the times? Were you by any chance repressed as a child? Is that a hanging sculpture? You'll still vote for me, won't you? Did I mention my transsexual operation? I really hate women who actually think sex means something! Did you come yet, dear? I'll tell you who I'm fanatasizing about if you tell me who you're fantasizing about... A good plastic surgeon can take care of that in no time! Does this count as a date? Oprah Winfrey had a show about men like you! Hic! I need another beer for this please. I think biting is romantic - don't you? Q: You can cook, too right? A: (Whaddaya think I'm doin'?) When would you like to meet my parents? Man: Maybe it would help if I thought about someone I really like... Woman: Yourself? Have you seen "Fatal Attraction"? Sorry about the name tags, I'm not very good with names. Don't mind me.. I always file my nails in bed. (in a phone booth) Do you mind if I make a few phone calls? I hope I didn't forget to turn the gas oven off. Do you have a light? Don't worry, my dog's really friendly for a Doberman. Sorry but I don't do toes! You could at least ACT like you're enjoying it! Petroleum jelly or no petroleum jelly, I said NO! Keep it down, my mother is a light sleeper... I'll bet you didn't know I work for "The Enquirer". So that's why they call you MR. Flash! My old girlfriend used to do it a LOT longer! Is this a sin too? I've slept with more women than Wilt Chamberlain! Hey, when is it going to be my friend's turn? Long kisses clog my sinuses... Please understand that I'm only doing this for a raise... How long do you plan to be "almost there"? You mean you're NOT my blind date?
  22. Ezekiel 25:17

    Joke

    5 Things Women Will Never Understand Men are a misunderstood lot, which all in all is probably for the best. Women are better off not knowing that we eat with our hands the minute they leave the room or that we use their nail clippers to trim our nose hair. Better for them, better for us. Still, it's annoying that women spend more time and money trying to understand the minds of cats than they do wondering about what makes men tick. Which is why they'll never understand... Our consuming need to own the biggest and most expensive version of just about everything. Our compulsive desire to drive off-road vehicles in cities and use corkscrews that resemble offshore drilling equipment is well documented. As marketing targets, men are suckers for terms like "professional" or "industrial strength," because inside every man is the germ of every profession he ever imagined himself one day excelling at. Most of these purchases are harmless, little more than childish wish fulfillment played out at a higher testosterone level. But occasionally we go too far. The guy upstairs from me once boasted that he had a filter which filled his flat with "operating theater quality air." I kept him away from my surgical steel steak knives. Why we are so bad at shopping. We've never been trained to do it the right way. Supermarkets are like giant booby traps for males -- which is why if you send a man out to get eggs, sugar and bread, you should not be surprised if he returns home with a case of beer, a pair of jeans and a tree. The reason why we don't like to discuss The Relationship. Most of us will find any excuse to dodge those conversations that start with questions like "Are you really happy?" and "Where do you see us going?" A relationship is a delicate thing, like an antique clock, and we know what will happen if we start picking it apart. Often our reticence will result in a lengthy conversation about why we have trouble talking about... "The Relationship." Why we think we can fix things. Almost all men believe they can repair virtually anything with a little patience. In reality, we're only half right. Men are extremely good at taking things apart: whether it's a dishwasher or an antique clock, a man can break it down to its most basic components in no time. Unfortunately, this is where our expertise usually leaves off, and we're mostly satisfied with leaving bits and pieces spread all over newspaper on the kitchen table. Men and video games. Women cannot understand how grown men can waste huge chunks of their lives zapping things off a screen. When a man repeatedly rings his girlfriend to say he has to work late and routinely comes home at two in the morning all glassy eyed, she will usually take this as evidence of an affair -- when it's more likely that a pirated copy of Streetfighter II is making the rounds at the office.
  23. Ezekiel 25:17

    Biggest talents never seen at Anfield

    Got to be little Davey thommo, total class, seems to have lost all ambition now an is strugglin with injuries, dam shame.
  24. Ezekiel 25:17

    Worst ever eleven

    Anybody for Ziege ??
  25. Ezekiel 25:17

    Eternal Sunshine of a spotless mind

    I hate all these new up there own arse films, no offence to those cul;tured enough on hear to apreciate them but what ever happened to films like Kickboxer with bad ass seens like kickin down palm trees, and Bloodsport with breakin bricks on your fod, that ruled big time. You know just wanna open a can of whoop ass after watchin them.
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