Duncan Clench

We lost a car key ages ago and we were just about making do with the one, but I was worried that if that got lost we'd really be in the shit. So I got in touch with the local garage who would need £250 to get and program a new one. Silly money.

Couple of weeks back I was going through some old clothes I was taking to charity and just before I flung the bag in the boot I thought I'd better check for money and rubbish in the pockets. Found the car key.

Almost made me feel guilty about blaming the wife for losing it.

If I snuck onto a ship by hiding in a box, I would be so scared of getting caught.

 

I'd be shipping myself the whole way.

https://www.facebook.com/sayingssaidwrong/

My brother in law and his wife were invited to 'brunch' by a couple of her mates (who are cunts) - and instructed to meet up at 13:30.

The cunts.

Yeah not seen Sky Q to be fair. I've got the Sky+ HD one and it's spot on. A few differences, but £90 a month cheaper.

To be fair, the Sky skins that you get on the Zgemma and Open V8 boxes are damn close to the native Sky menus with the same channel numbers and all that. It's very good.

I too have an egg poacher and can vouch for its ability. Mine also can do pasta, popcorn, curries, warm babies bottles, make stew etc. The brand I cannot remember put I think it is Pan.

Poached popcorn can't be good. (smiley face)

I can do a great poached egg. None of this swirling the water around nonsense. Just good, fresh eggs in a pan of water. Easy.

@simonlfcgreen: anyone need cheaper broadband give us a shout

Shame... I was looking to pay more. Otherwise I would definitely go with Squeasant.net.

Depends on how you do it mate. The boxes are around £80 to buy, and then you can install everything yourself following this sort of guide:

Then you'd need to buy the 'line'. From what I've read/seen, eBay lines can be a bit flaky, in that the line goes down and the sellers disappear.

Or, you can buy one fully set up with the line (subscription) included for about £180 (that's for twin tuners - so you can record). I'm not sure how much this fella charges for the line only but I've been watching this page for quite a few weeks and found them to be quick to respond to any problems people have and very knowledgeable. 

https://www.facebook.com/groups/1554631864838536/

I think both those links are from here, somewhere in this thread.

I'm officially out of contract with Sky in a few days. I've had the Zgemma box plugged in for the best part of a week and it's going well so far. IPTV area is excellent.

The interface is EXACTLY like Sky TV. The only difference at the moment is that series linking programs is a bit less user friendly. That being said, I've only got a 32gb USB stick in the back at the moment. I'll be giving it a while longer before I invest in a dedicated external hard drive for it.

So far, so excellent.

Sorry again... HD channels from Sky which you DON'T get!

1 hour on the phone to those bastards today, and I'm sure that's just the start.

Sorry mate, missed your response there! Yeah, just the HD channels from Sky which you get, but in standard definition. Which is fine.

I'm cancelling Sky right now, and the Zgemma is arriving any day now. I"m sure it'll take some getting used to, but my TV only package was over £90 a month with multi room and HD. The gave me 30% off last year, and I'm paying £77.50 right now.

You get the free-to-air ones, but not Sky. I think you get the BT Sports ones as well. I'm currently looking at this and planning to bin Sky off entirely.

My understanding is that you plug your Sky cables in, and the box decodes the signals. The Sky HD ones are encrypted so they can't get decode them at the moment.

Fucking lovely. 

Asda's kitchen roll and bog roll are good, but they're not much cheaper than the brands these days. I've been trying out many and various own brand items recently and I think they're the only things I've stuck with aside from packs of cheesy balls and the odd pizza.

I like Asda. They're fruit and veg is definitely more tasty than Sainsbury's or Tesco and it's cheaper. I've heard Aldi's is even better but there's not one around where I live. They need to work on the layout of their stores though. Fucking hell.

I think I might need an eye test. How long am I supposed to wait before I finally get round to booking one? Was thinking 4 years.

Brown pans.

My wife was cooking he other day and left the frying pan on the hob, forgetting about it. I was watching TV and her head poked around the corner and said, cool as a cucumber: "What do we do when the frying pan catches fire?".

I don't know about you but I would be inclined to extinguish the fire as soon as possible. She turned the extractor up to full power which didn't seem to do the trick.

When you're shopping online and trying to get a closer look at something so you click on 'Enlarge Picture' only for the website to bring up the same sized fucking picture on a big background.

Easyjet flight back from Krakow after a weekend getting extremely drunk and eating nothing but meat (ooo-er) I let one go. I've never before had a fart that anyone in a plane has even got wind of (pun intended) but this one just permeated throughout the aircraft. It was probably the worst I've ever done. People 10 rows back were exclaiming and I actually turned round and owned up to it because I couldn't let anyone else take credit for a guff of that magnitude.

By the way, as I said I've been looking for a mod to replace the Cool Fire iv and stumbled across the Eleaf iPower. 5000mah and about the same size as the Cool Fire. Got rave reviews so I'll be getting that on payday.

Meant to add to this yesterday  when I saw Walk On's post. I got the Nautilus X tank myself over the weekend. So far it hasn't leaked, (and when I say that what i actually mean it's pretty much impossible to as the air hole is on the top of the tank), there has been no spit back and no gurgling worth talking about either. Can't stress how happy I am to forgo the need for a tissue in easy reach in case it has leaked again and also not finding a puddle of e-liquid on the coffee table when I get up in the mornings is always good. It's not perfect however. Small tank (2ml I believe) and the flavour while it isn't terrible it isn't anything special either. Might see what other coils are available for the tank.

Yeah it's a 2ml tank but I got the extension pack to make it 4ml. I read that the 1.5ohm coils are shit for flavour but the 1.8ohm ones are good. I went straight in at 1.8 and have no complaints.

There are plenty of leak-proof tanks around now and they all have the air intake at the top. The Joyetech Cubis is another I've tried, but found the coils to burn out too quick. Only tried one type of coil though, so it might be worth giving that another go. Totally leak proof. Every other tank leaks. 

Same as Turdseye really. Gave up the piggies 2 years ago and vape 6mg nicotine strength right now. In a few months I'll go to 3mg I guess. It's a recurring thing with the wife.... why don't I give up vaping? Well I like it. It's not like smoking where you try to convince people you like it. It's actually a pleasant taste and it's not expensive.

So I'll probably vape forever. 0mg nicotine I hope.

I've been having problems settling on a set-up that works for me. I'm a mouth-to-lung vaper and it's been a struggle the last 12 months to find a decent tank for it. Everything went so far towards sub-ohm that finding a balance between flavour and coil longevity was almost impossible.

I've been using the iSub S tank - which is really really good... but the could were lasting 2 or 3 days before burning out. I was on the 1.5ohm and vaping at a piddly 8w. Great flavour and vapour production, but the coils were a nightmare. I moved on to 0.5ohm coils at 22w for a while and as well as burning through liquid like mad, the coils laster about a week, and to be honest it was too much for me in terms of throat hit.

I just got a Nautilus X tank. 1.8ohm coils at 12w and it's fucking fantastic. Yet to know how long the coils last but on day 4 now and still going strong. Again, it burns through the juice quick, but I'll take that. Using a Cool Fire iv as well, but it's old so the battery isn't great. Looking for something smaller like the Smok R200 but it's pretty pricey!

Will look at the suggestions for e-liquid, thanks! I've been using vapeclub.co.uk which has a fantastic selection and next day delivery, but it's not cheap. If you haven't tried it, Charlie's Chalk Dust - Head Banging Boogie is my adv now. Lovely stuff - if you like sweet.

She wasted about half a bottle of my Sierra Nevada Pale Ale last night by asking for it and then not drinking it.

Divorce proceedings have begun.