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I remember being 3-0 down against Milan in 2005 thinking thank fuck we aren't winning 2-0.

Another first.

That was glorious. My blue mate messaged me earlier, said "do you fancy a pint, I can't be fucked with going the match, the summer wasn't long enough". So we met down the local with SSN in the background. They're 2 up and he's full of it. Then Bournemouth make it 2-1, he says "you watch, they'll get a draw here", I said "mate, it's Everton, they've enough time to win". That was a classic 5 mins.

From the Guardian comments. Very plausible-

It turns out I can get more erect

A Neal Maupay tweet about that result would be just perfect about now

I’ve been about as supportive and as understanding of FSG as it’s possible to have been, I’ve praised the things they’ve done well, looked at the things they haven’t done well at in context and been understanding, for a long time I have fully supported and endorsed sensible practice in the transfer market (the type of practice that saw us wait for VVD, spend big on Alisson funded in part by Coutinho) which avoided spending our way into oblivion like United and Chelsea have done - spending badly is worse than not spending at all - but we still spent good amounts on the right player, with an astonishing hit rate. All of that I was and still am fully supportive of, and I acknowledge that they run the club as a business brilliantly, I’m glad they don’t overspend and that we research the fuck out of everything. However, these past few years have been different. We have had so much money come into the club, we have had a clear and obvious need in certain positions, and we still haven’t got the job done. They’re not beyond criticism. Even fully accepting that this summer was one of change, we knew for ages that Klopp was going. It is not at all difficult to have drawn up a list of four or five very good, mobile, talented defensive midfielders. Zubimendi falling through after he gave his word… no problem, shit happens. What doesn’t happen is saying ‘oh, erm. No more targets then’. No, that’s shit. Put a big amount on the table for somebody else. Not make a whimper about Varela 15 minutes before deadline. If the deal collapsed on ZubiTuesday then on Wednesday we should have had our hand up the kilt of Port or Atalanta. If they can’t fund big transfers, then move on. I accept it’s not easy to improve on our team when considering all aspects of a player, but when you fail, season after season, It’s embarrassing. Sort it the fuck out. It’s not easy, but it’s not fucking impossible either. We are one of the very top, biggest clubs in the world. We have spending power, and lots of room within PSR rules. We are starting to lag behind and lose momentum. And if you don’t sort Trent out, then suck a bag of dicks. Mo and VVD for another two years too. And Alisson. Stop fucking about.

They are worse than 502 bad gateway.

VID-20231219-WA0028.mp4.220c08e94eac3270f3c079f415b69cb2.mp4

You've got to give it to Everton. They've created a football club their fans hate more than Liverpool.

Fuck it, this is so funny. I sent Stig this pic Thursday and he was winding me up threatening to post it on the site. As a mate of mine called me a “Happy Shopper Sean Dyche cunt”.

Whenever you think Everton can't possibly be any more hilarious, they somehow always find a way.

On the plus side, I imagine they'll be first on Match of the Day tonight.

Reminds me of when I woke up on Christmas morning to find they'd bought me a black and white telly. This was 1994.

I’ve just been removed from a WhatsApp group along with a few others.

Fuck Arteta and Arsenal.

Made one just now for lunch. Had nothing in after holiday and had stuff to do this morning including gling shopping so just in now and lining my stomach ahead of anniversary drinks I'm invited out to later.

So I've entered the world of @Fugitivethis morning. With some bad planning, knowing I was out last night and it would be big and late, I had nothing in to make even a bacon butty, let alone a much needed fry up - a situation no doubt made worse by setting a clock to buy fucking oasis tickets. So I entered the world of online ordering for breakfast - which I have to say, I've been afraid of after @Fugitive documenting of the subject. I needn't have worried. A solid 6.5/10 for this one. As is typical for me these days, my eyes are bigger than my belly. I couldn't manage 2 of the sausages or one of the eggs and half black pudding (which wasn't great. From the plated version below, the missus has my fungus. It was expensive though I thought, even though it was massive. 15 quid. Emil's kitchen, county road.

It's one of my own It's one of my ooooooooown Saturday's breakfast Is one of my own.

This is our time.

They really should open up a county rd shop....

Listening to the BBC Merseyside phone in, and Alan Stubbs - with some conviction - is stating that being 2-0 up, is the worst score line you can have in football. An interesting concept.

2-3 hahahahahahaha

He has tried to frame himself as some intellectual voice of reason over the past few years but his bitterness and primate tendencies always end up shining through. He’s a gobshite.

Mate, that's a screenshot. It's not actually loading. It's just a picture.

Can that telly play centre half?

You say they won't be missed, like they weren't missed when out injured (Adrian aside). Part of our problem last season were footballers who all too often don't get on the pitch. We got rid of two of them and all we needed to do was replace them with good players who'll actually play and we would see an improvement in our squad. We finished last season on our arse, perhaps we wouldn't had thiago and matip got on the pitch.

We gassed out at the end of last season and fell off a cliff. Clearly we have less players available than we had last season. We likely have more games with the new CL format. So, yes, we have been weakened.

This makes me more confident.

They have cracked it....first on MOTD!

Ooh look at me, I have Wi-Fi.

Is that Tiverton Morrisons car park?

They won't be too arsed. Their big game is tomorrow.

One more for you, gotta give the people what they want.

Didn't mind her but got tickets via the club so went with the missus. It was tremendous, and I get the criticism of stadium gigs, they're shite especially if you're seated. However if you're standing....

If we look at our squad from last season, knowing about the injuries to Matip and Thiago, and compare it with this season, I would argue we have a better squad now with the addition of Chiesa. My reasoning would be this. 1. Quansah and Bradley can now be seen as regular first team players, based on their quality, appearances and experience from last season. 2. The young players we have sold will be replaced with new young players, its not like those spots are empty. 3. Tyler Morton is back with much added experience from first team football after very good loan spells at Blackburn and Hull, Im certain he will get more game time than Clark did in the league last season. 4. Endo is now used to the pace of the PL, Elliott is one year older and finally have had an injury free season behind him and Szoboszlai have also got that one year of PL experience under his belt. 5. We have brought in Chiesa, a player who can cover every position in attack and he can also play in reguler midfield. The only thing I dont really understand with this window is how we identified a central midfielder as a priority with the bid of Zubumendi, but then did not follow it up with a signing in that position when that deal fell through. We were the best team in the league for long periods last season, only the last few months did we fall behind after the injury to Salah. I dont think its so bad as many are trying to make us believe.

I don't get how they've done this. Should've done the ballots for guaranteed tickets and then sent out unique codes to successful ballot winners so there'd be no pressure on the website. Also should have given people a week to register for the ballot. Basically, they should have done the Taylor Swift model.

I said on the Taylor Swift thread but I've no idea how people can be arsed with these giant stadium gigs. All that hassle/cost to get a ticket to stand in the pissing rain and barely hear a bunch of insects 200m away. Having to queue for a pint & a piss as well. To each his own I suppose.

1. I don’t think anyone has been unrealistic in expecting them to obtain the DM that we’ve been expecting for thee windows, and which the coach wanted. 2. Trust a hedge fund? No. I said at the outset that where our interests and their interests aligned, fine, but where they don’t, hold them to account. And never, ever, trust them. Who would trust any football club owner. They’re all cunts to one degree or another.