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This “race for fourth” thing is really beginning to offend me. They’re all fucking shit. Every last one of them. None of them deserve to be in the Champions League and I hope whoever back doors their way into fourth spot gets knocked out in the qualifiers. As I said last week, West Ham probably offend me the least on the basis that they’re performing to the level they should be, or maybe even above it. All those other fucking bums, so called members of the ‘big six’ are a fucking pathetic embarrassment. Let’s start with Spurs, who having lost at home to Southampton last midweek followed it up by losing to Wolves at home four days later. The same Wolves, let’s not forget, who got beat at home by ten man Arsenal. If they hadn’t lost to Arsenal I’d be wanting Wolves to get top four, but I can’t forgive that so fuck them too. Wolves can’t be any good if they lost to Arsenal, yet Spurs lost meekly to them. Jimenez opened the scoring thanks to an assist by Lloris, who had one of those “Hugo Lloris” afternoons. Fucking pathetic for that first goal. Sunday league stuff and the second goal was even worse. Conte might even drop him as he’s such a hothead you can’t predict how he’ll react in these situations. He started Sessegnon at left wing back and then hooked him after 28 minutes. Ouch. That kid looked amazing at Fulham but his career has gone down the toilet since he turned us down to join Spurs. Contrast that with Harvey Elliott and you can see why Carvalho is so keen to join us. Incredibly, despite all these shit results they’ve had lately, if they win their games in hand Spurs would still go into fourth spot. That just shows you how fucking useless the others are. Not that Spurs will win the games in hand, because not only are they playing like shit, but Conte looks like he’s thrown his toys out of the pram already. He hadn’t lost three league games in a row since he was managing Atalanta in 2009. Spurs will do that to you though. One of the other ‘contenders’, the mancs, drew at home with Southampton and then had a typically unconvincing 1-0 win over Brighton. Fucking Brighton, they do my head in. They always dominate the likes of United and Arsenal but never make it count because they can’t fucking score. So frustrating. Just buy Divock Origi for fuck's sake. That's what you need. Big Div might even get them into the top four when you look at the absolute shite they're competing against. United took the lead against Southampton with a Sancho tap in after what the commentator described as a “rapey” like attack. Greenwood wasn’t on the field and Ronaldo wasn’t involved in the move, so not sure what he’s on about there. Oh wait, it was “rapier”. Sorry, my bad. Che Adams levelled just after the break with a brilliant finish and that’s how it ended despite chances for both teams. They did beat Brighton in midweek with a Ronaldo goal but there was nothing for them to feel good about, especially as there are all kinds of stories coming out of Old Trafford now about players being on opposite sides. There’s “Team Ronaldo” which includes De Gea, Fernandez, Fred and others, and then there are those who don’t like him, supposedly including Maguire, Shaw, Wan Bissaka and Lindelof. Let’s call them “Team Messy”. Last week there was all that about them not liking Rangnick’s methods and taking the piss out of his American assistant. This week it's the stuff about Ronaldo, and also some claims that there are players in the squad who are livid about the ‘treatment’ of Greenwood by the club and by the players who immediately unfollowed him on social media when the story broke. The culture there is fucking horrendous and they’re going to be shit for some time to come. I don’t even care if they sneak into fourth as it won’t make much difference to them. For Spurs or Arsenal it would make a difference as it would help them attract better players. United can attract those players by paying them more money than anyone else, but they could add Haaland and Mbappe to that squad and still be shit because it’s all so toxic. To the bottom of the table now as Everton battered Leeds at Goodison to relieve some of the pressure on themselves. I’ll be honest, I’m fuming at Leeds, the fucking gobshites. They’d been doing ok and this looked like a tricky fixture for the beleaguered blues, but in the end it was easy because Leeds were fucking pathetic. Cunts. I hope we put 10 past them next week and if they go down then it’s no more than they deserve after this pathetic showing. They even let old man Seamus score. I mean fucking hell. The home crowd were rabid and were right behind the team. Well they would be wouldn’t they, they scored in the first 15 minutes so there isn’t time for them to turn on the players. That’s not me talking, it’s Ben Foster, who said “the Everton fans are horrible. Horrible to their own team I mean. We always say if we can stop them scoring early the crowd will turn on them”. If Leeds had started well and scored first that crowd would have been toxic, but fucking useless Leeds conceded two early goals. Honestly, I’m proper fucking disgusted with them, the pricks. Let's see if that Goodison crowd are as 'feisty' when they play City in a couple of weeks. Lampard has only been there a fortnight and already I’m seeing a bald spot emerging. He’ll be like Bobby Charlton by the time he gets sacked. Once Everton touches you…. Watford lost again as Brighton went to Vicarage Road and came away with a 2-0 win courtesy of goals by Maupay and Webster. There wasn’t much between the sides but for once Brighton had the edge in finishing. Hodgson has definitely tightened Watford up but now they just can’t fucking score at all. Early in the season they were scoring goals but also conceding them by the truckload. Can Roy get the balance right? Probably not but what a story it would be if he came out of retirement and kept them up. He’s still as cooky as ever. I loved that hatstand comment he made about why he took the job. “I was never going to turn it down as it was the siren call from the mermaid as the sailor passes by on his ship. It was out of the blue but I'm glad it came because I am ready.” Crazy old goat. I do think he’ll coax a tune from Watford but it might be too late as they’ve got it all to do now. On the plus side for them Emanuel Dennis looked sharp and might be finding his early season form again. Watford need him firing if they are to have any chance. He went closest to an equaliser when he hit the bar and he was a threat all game. They’ve got Sarr back now too so maybe they can start picking up some wins. I’d love them to stay up, especially if it was at the expense of someone I don’t like. The bottom three are suddenly adrift again now after the wins for Everton and Newcastle. Norwich started ok against City and caused a few problems, but eventually they just got steamrollered. I didn’t watch any of it so I don’t have anything else to add. City also had a comprehensive win in Portugal in midweek too. I didn’t watch that either, obviously, but I did see Guardiola’s condescending quotes about how Sporting were brilliant for the first five minutes and the scoreline isn’t a reflection of their quality. Get to fuck you patronising, arrogant little bald wanker. Brentford may yet still get dragged into the dogfight at the bottom as everything seems like a huge struggle for them. They’re still getting results but it just seems like a massive struggle for them every week. They have to fight and scrap for everything they get and nothing comes easy. They drew with Palace this week but it could have gone either way. Both teams had big penalty shouts that weren’t given. Guehi handled from a set-piece but was let off the hook because there was a shove in his back. Only a little shove, and probably not enough to cause his arm to go up like that, but it was a shove and the ref is entitled to give that. Could have gone either way though. At the other end, Zaha was denied a penalty when he went around Rico Henry and was hauled down by the waist. Did he play for it? Probably, but he went past him, had got goal side and the lad put two hands around his waist and pulled him down. He went down easy, as he does, but I’d be screaming for a pen if that was us. Zaha’s reputation counts against him a lot these days. Loads of times he doesn’t get decisions he should do, which you can argue is fair enough because of ‘the boy who cried wolf’ thing, but when Raheem Sterling and Harry Kane are getting the benefit of the doubt so often then arl Wilf is entitled to feel aggrieved. Brentford need a win or two soon though just to get themselves a bit of breathing space. They’ve played 25 games, which is five more than Burnley and two or three more than everyone else down there. They need my boy Ivan Toney back, and hopefully Eriksen can come in and make a difference. Onto Sunday now, I mentioned Spurs losing to Wolves already so that leaves West Ham v Leicester and Newcastle v Aston Villa. Yet another goal by in form Jarrod Bowen put the Hammers ahead at Leicester but the home side stuck at it and Tielemans equalised from the spot after Cresswell handled. Leicester grew in confidence and started to look like the side that has done so well in the last couple of seasons. Barnes and Tielemans were bossing it and Barnes teed up Ricardo to head them into the lead. It looked like they were on the brink of a much needed, morale boosting win. And then…. a corner in stoppage time. Uh-oh. Leicester fans will have had their hearts in their mouths and rightly so. They just can’t defend corners and Craig Dawson steamed in to put the ball in with his shoulder / arm. The old ’t-shirt line’ rule coming into play there. Not sure whether that should have counted or not. Looks like more arm than shoulder to me but who knows anymore. Finally, Newcastle won again as Kieran Trippier found the net with a free-kick for the second game running. He’s now injured and will be out for a while, so that will reduce their goal threat by about 75%. The Villa wall was a shambles and Stevie will be fuming at that. The keeper should do better too. See the Little Magician did one of his customary away from home disappearing acts. I remember those all too well. Villa thought they’d equalised through Watkins but he was an inch or two offside and it was ruled out. Newcastle had looked boss against Everton but they offered virtually nothing in this game. Neither did Villa though as Stevie just looked thoroughly fed up sat on the bench. They shouldn’t be losing games like this as man for man they’re much better than Newcastle, who are basically just Saint-Maximin and a bunch of stiffs. If Everton are going to save themselves then all we can hope is that Newcastle go back into freefall, the bonesaw justifying cunts.