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Showing content with the highest reputation since 20/05/21 in all areas

  1. 42 points
    Was in same ITU as me in Royal Hallamshire. Tony Bland next to me, and Andrew a few beds along. I have no memory of it obviously as I was in a coma. Rest easy Andrew. How I survived fuck knows. Very sad day. Again. another one.
  2. 35 points
    Its not that good a story but I'll tell it anyway. In the mid to late 80's as a young lad I would spend my bus money on booze and hitch hike home from Malvern, where I grew up and where my mates were, to Worcester where we had moved to. The one night I got picked up by this bloke and young teenage girl who were in an old battered van with a continuous bench front seat. I was sat next to the girl who, when we had been travelling about 5 minutes, I noticed her being nudged by the bloke driving and she then proceeded to put her hand on my crotch. I was a tad uncomfortable with this but obviously as a young lad, had no control over stirrings. Anyway we came to a halt at Lower Wick roundabout (for those that know the area) and I grabbed the door handle, jumped out and legged it. When it all came out about the Wests it was revealed he used to come up to Malvern and Worcester with Rose, looking for victims. I knew the bloke was Fred but the girl certainly wasnt Rose. Anyway, when I then read the book it told of how Fred used to also take his daughter out with him to look for young lads who he would then encourage to shag her in the back of his van whilst he would watch and wank off. I can picture him to this day and am 100% sure it was Fred and his daughter.
  3. 34 points
    Buzzing. To all the 'i don't give a toss about league cup' mob - tell that to my 12 year old who was crestfallen at half time and absolutely buzzing at end, who literally yapped excitedly every step of the 30 or so min walk back from ground and has only just really stopped! Thought we were excellent 2nd half and Kop played its part....ultimately when all is said and done winning football matches and trophies is 1. What this football club exists for and 2. Is all that really matters... Yeah the league cup is the 'lowest priority' of the 4 we can win, but winning things is actually something that you don't get that many chances to do really and it does not happen all that often - every trophy matters to me personally and it felt like it mattered in that ground tonight and it really mattered to my lad.
  4. 34 points
  5. 29 points
    He’s a sneaky little shithouse prick whose last minutes in PL management should be watching his team concede goals 4 and 5 against us against a backdrop of Liverpool fans singing ‘Ole’s at the wheel’. Once he’s been sacked he should spend the rest of his days rocking himself in a darkened room muttering ‘fucking Jurgen Klopp, we deserved all our penalties ’ on a long continuous loop until he finally shits himself into oblivion. Fucking odious little cunt.
  6. 28 points
    After a long labour, Baby_B arrived on Sunday. Mum and little one are great but staying in hospital a few days as a precaution. She's beautiful, I'm besotted.
  7. 28 points
    They might be a cunt club and they might not appreciate him, but the blueshite have got one of the classiest men in football managing them. Rafa Benitez has been involved in a childrens charity called OLLY which helps grieving children who have lost loved ones through acts of murder or violence and through culpable road death and deprivation. Today, Rafa and Montse donated a static caravan to the charity at Rhyl so these kids can have some sort of holiday. He might be their manager now, but he'll always be one of us. Apologies for the balloons.
  8. 28 points
    And people said Everton wouldn't be in the dock before 2024.
  9. 27 points
  10. 27 points
    Hi All, I’ve spoken to one of Amy’s best mates and there isn’t a date confirmed for the funeral yet but she’ll let me know. We’ve spoken about some flowers and a donation to their chosen charity. More to follow on this when their plans allow. In the meantime I’ve sent her mum a card and a note with love and sympathies from us all. I’ll update when I know about the funeral plans and I’ll put together a collection, so that anyone who wishes to contribute can do so.
  11. 26 points
    Roll up! Roll up! Step up for the TLW competition of the year. A quiz where YOU may be the answer!! It's a quiz about all things TLW. How good is your knowledge of the forum? All questions and answers are to do with legendary posts, posters and moments. Become the envy of the forum by acquiring the title the "Official TLW guru" (previously held by @Chairman Meow -- No pressure, but @Chairman Meow got 100% last time!!!) Prize You can use "Official TLW guru" as your forum-rank/title throughout 2020. Rules • After clicking the link below, you'll need to enter a NickName:- ○ Don't use swear words. The software will change it to something random and I wont be able to work out who you are. ○ Try to make it so I can work out your username from it. Use your forum username if you can. • You only get a limited time (20 secs) to answer each question. • Each question is timed. The faster you answer a question, the more points you score. • Only one entry per forumite. (multiple attempts will be disqualified and you will be lampooned on the forum). ○ If it times-out or crashes or something then by all means have another go. Its just for fun after all. • Jennings' decision is final no matter how drunken/incorrect. Link to Quiz - You can use any browser. I have tested it in Chrome (on an iPhone and a Desktop PC). https://kahoot.it/challenge/0112885?challenge-id=f75d1cf4-9a8d-4e7f-ac44-2592df2c27ed_1640981953705 I am sure there are loads a way to cheat/ruin it - but I've put a load of work in here, so do your best to play in the spirit intended. Good luck!! Please reply in this thread with comments with any feedback/comments/errors/omissions/funnies.
  12. 26 points
  13. 26 points
    Report by Dave Usher All it took was one weekend to show just how fucking empty and shit last season was. Right across the board, the games were just better and more intense and the players looked so much more into it and excited. This one game alone was more enjoyable than anything that happened last season. Even the good things last season were shit because fans weren’t there. Alisson’s goal was amazing, a moment we’ll remember for the rest of our lives. Imagine it in a full stadium though. Totally different level. Look at the goal celebrations from the lads in this one too. Last season no-one really wanted to celebrate anything (Alisson’s goal apart, obviously) because there was no atmosphere, no electricity, everything was just sanitised and watered down without crowds. So this was great, I loved it. Seeing the joy on the faces of our goalscorers (and those celebrating with them) was just heart warming and made me feel all fuzzy inside. It’s been a while since we had this and I don’t think anybody will ever take it for granted again. The players have missed the fans as much as we’ve missed being there. I don’t just mean out players either, right across the whole of football everyone was buzzing this weekend. Except Arsenal fans, obviously. It’s not just that there are fans in the stadium though, it’s that there are away fans too. This was as close to normal as we can hope for really. It was just fucking amazing to have proper footy back and the players looked just as excited about it as we are. Having full stadiums again is probably worth 20 points to us right off the bat. I’m serious. We didn’t start this game particularly well but I barely even noticed as I was just enjoying the novelty of it so much. It feels like forever since we’ve seen games in full stadiums with two sets of fans and I was just completely engaged in it in a way I never was last season. The first team selection of the season was a little bit surprising though. Most of it was as expected but I didn’t see Fabinho missing out or Ox starting. That said, I wasn’t concerned by the line up as I thought it would be more than good enough to win the game, but whenever Fab isn’t there you know we’re going to be weaker than when he’s playing because he’s a fucking monster. Have we ever not bossed a midfield when he’s been out there? Genuine question. Milner in the six role doesn’t especially inspire confidence though. He’ll do a job there because he’s James fucking Milner and he can play anywhere, but against better opposition that midfield trio would have struggled. Whenever Keita plays we usually look more open anyway, but pair him up with Ox and that’s a concern when he we don’t have the ball, and that concern is greater when it’s Milner being asked to pick up the slack. Him getting an early yellow card was the most obvious thing we’ll see all season. On paper that midfield should be class when we did have the ball, but it didn’t work out like that. I mean, it was ok, I don’t think we struggled in any way and I always felt we were in control, but it could have been better and it was when Fabinho eventually came on. I had high hopes for Ox in this game but he was really quiet and just couldn’t really get into it. Keita was very efficient though. Neat and tidy, did nothing wrong, just a solid performance from him. The opening goal was a bit scrappy but we’ll take it. It started with Norwich appealing for a foul when Pukki went down in the vicinity of Van Dijk. The linesman wasn’t interested and neither was VAR. Quite right, there was fuck all in that and it looked like Pukki tripped over his own feet as much as anything else. Milner switched the play to Trent who picked out Mo in the box. His touch was wayward but Jota was onto it in a flash and toe poked it goal wards. Krul should have saved it but didn’t. Mo got an assist for that, which is a joke really. Worst assist since a goal kick hit Aquilani on the arse and Stevie lashed it in from 30 yards at Burnley. I know this isn’t the case but it sure as hell feels as though Jota scores every time he plays. Other than the hat-trick away in Italy, it’s never more than one, but he just chips in with a goal seemingly every time he’s out there. And he can do it from any spot in the front three too, which is a great bonus for us as it gives Klopp all kinds of options for rotation. Jota can play any of those three spots and that gives us a lot of flexibility. He’s maybe not as silky as the other three but he’s ‘johnny on the spot’ and I fucking love him. The goal had been coming as we had sustained pressure in their half and were forcing a lot of corners, all of which looked like they would end up with us having a shot at goal. We weren’t winning the initial header but Van Dijk and Matip were causing panic and the second ball seemed to fall to us every time. We had a penalty appeal ignored when Mo tangled with Cantwell. Last season that was a penalty. Not to us, obviously, but at the other end that was 100% being given. We saw it when Welbeck won that late pen against Robbo in fact. This wasn’t a pen and I’m not complaining it wasn’t given. I’m only mentioning it because there seems to have been a shift in how games are going to be refereed. This first weekend has been the best display of leaguewide refereeing we’ve seen in years. Hardly any VAR sticking its fucking nose in either, which is always a good thing. Norwich had a soft penalty appeal dismissed too, which again, last season it may not have been. No fans and constant VAR bollocks made last season the least enjoyable ever but hopefully we can get past that now. Fans are back and if VAR winds its neck in maybe this year will be fun again. It’s only one game though so I’m not taking anything for granted with regards to refs and VAR. Encouraging start though. Very encouraging actually. Keep it going and I may need to rethink my stance of us having the worst refs in any of the big European leagues. Anyway, having gone ahead the only question I had now was how many we’d score. I didn’t see any way we would let them back into it, especially after Fabinho came on to tighten our grip on the game. He was joined in a double substitution by Firmino, as they replaced Ox and Jota. Might be a while before Ox gets another start now that Hendo and Thiago are almost ready. This was a big chance for him but he didn’t take it. It won’t matter too much too Klopp as he will take training performances into account too, but in the eyes of a lot of fans this won’t have done Ox any favours. Being outplayed by Keita isn’t a good look when you’re trying to force your way into a midfield than already has three of the best in the world. In Ox’s favour he does do things none of the others can, he just needs to start producing it. As for Jota, he did what he was in the team to do and in addition to his goal he also had a long run that took him past two defenders before that little turd Cantwell scythed him down on the edge of the box. Don’t blame the lad for the foul, I’d expect any of our players to do the same, but I just don’t like him from when Norwich were last up. I can’t even remember why exactly, but the look of him alone is enough to make me think he’s probably a knob. He looks like he could be the leader of the ‘Young Conservatives’. Mind you, I used to think that about my boy Patrick Bamford and I couldn’t have been more wrong there as he’s a top lad. Usually I’m spot on with these things though so until he proves otherwise I’ll assume Cantwell is more than likely a posh little wanker. Jota was shaping up for what might have already ended the ‘goal of the season’ contest so it was frustrating to see him chopped down in his prime. Jota’s performance was fine yet I agreed with the substitution as it made sense to freshen things up, and Bobby had looked sharp against Osasuna so it was important to get him involved. He could be so important for us this season. We can still win the league if he’s not at his best (I didn’t think he had a great season when we did win it) but if he bounces back and chips in with 20 while still doing what he does, that really could be the difference for us, especially if Sadio is back to his old self too. It’s way too soon to be making any assessments of those two but Sadio had looked really sharp in pre-season and he looks like he’s got the eye of the tiger again. As for Bobby, he got a couple of goals last week and has now scored again, so that bodes well, especially with Jota being so prolific and Mo just being a relentlessly constant pain in the arse to everyone he plays against. He just never stops running in behind. Every time we get the ball he’s sprinting in behind looking for a through ball and it must be draining as fuck for defenders to have to continually try to deal with that. What makes it harder is that he never gets tired and can run just as fast and just as powerfully in stoppage time as he can in the first minute. He just wears the opponent down. And now he’s playing in his strike partners too? When he squared that ball to tee up bobby for a tap in my first thought was this scene in Happy Gilmore….. Mo learned how to pass. Uh-oh! Seriously, I know he’s done that before but in this game he was looking to do it quite a bit. Him and Sadio passed to each other more in this game than they did in the first six months of last season (although it got much better over the run in). The assist for Bobby was great because we’ve seen plenty of occasions when he’d have taken that on himself, even on his weak foot. The pass was perfectly executed and Bobby was off the mark for the season. Great stuff. It also meant the game was won. Norwich might have been able to somehow score one but they were never getting two. And then soon after they needed three. Mo’s goal was a beauty and it had been coming. He was just so dangerous all day, but that’s not just what I mean. I also felt that the type of goal he scored had been coming. In the first half there were two or three occasions when our corners fell to him or another one of our lads on the edge of the box because Norwich just weren’t defending that area. Mo had a shot blocked from a similar area in the first half but this time there was no stopping it. The first touch was exquisite, the second was deadly. Fucking brilliant goal and well deserved as he was the best player on the pitch. Norwich did threaten a consolation but were thwarted by Alisson, who made a fantastic save and then bounced back up immediately to twice clear follow up attempts. Outstanding. As was Matip, who nobody ever talks about even though he is the only centre back in the league even vaguely close to Van Dijk levels. You aren’t ever going to convince me that Joel Matip isn’t fucking amazing. Literally his only weakness is his lack of durability, because when he plays he’s better than anyone in the Premier League not named Virgil. As for the man himself, cruise control. Barely broke sweat, but him just being out makes everyone else feel ten feet tall. The front three are giving me different vibes than I’ve had from them in a good while. It’s only one game but it felt like they were having fun playing together. There have been times when they’ve looked like they were playing, I don’t want to say for themselves, as these lads aren’t like that, but they weren’t playing for each other. By that I mostly mean Mo and Sadio, because Bobby’s troubles were nothing to do with that. If anything he’s been far too unselfish. The best moment of this whole game for me was Mo spurning a great chance late on because the only thing in his head when he went through on goal was whether he could square it to Mané. He tried but it was cut out. I fucking loved that though and I’m sure Klopp did too. They were looking for each other all game and it just felt like 2018 again to me. Hopefully that continues. Just look how happy Mo was when he set up Bobby. His little beaming face. I’m sensing something already here. For all the absolute shite being spoken by pundits about how its between City and Chelsea, we’ve got the best team in this league and it’s not even really close. Squad depth levels the playing field somewhat but we’ve got the best first eleven and that’s a hill I’ll die on. People are putting far too much stock in what happened last season and as a result they’re vastly over-rating City and under-rating us because of it. Last season means fuck all because they were basically playing a different sport. It has as much relevance to this year as it would it it had been eight a side or if they’d been playing on a beach. Football in empty stadiums is so far removed from normal footy and this weekend showed that. I reckon the players sense that too. They know how much having no fans hurt them last year and you can see how excited they are now. There’s a spring in their step and having Virgil back will make everyone even more confident. This is basically the same group that ran away with the league a couple of years ago. Ok, Gini’s no longer here but Thiago and Jota are, and Konate as well now. I look at it this way. When we send a team out there that has Alisson, Virg, Joel, Hendo and Fabinho right up the spine (you can add Thiago to that too), that team is not going to lose more than a couple of games. And when the front lads are firing as we know they can, we aren’t losing any. Don’t misunderstand me there, I’m not saying we’ll go unbeaten because I don’t expect the front lads to be firing every single game. But if we get Sadio and Bobby back to the level we expect, combined with Mo and Diogo doing what they do, who’s finishing above us? No-one, especially with the quality we have in the rest of the side. We’ll win this league if we don’t have major injury problems. I don’t have any doubts about that because the last time football was normal we were light years ahead of everybody. One freak season in empty stadiums and no centre halves isn’t going to change that. Losing Robbo was a blow but hopefully he’s back soon. Kostas did well but he’s definitely better going forward than he is defending, and from about 70 minutes he was blowing out of his arse. Klopp said “someone pulled the plug on him” which was a great line and totally accurate. He looked shattered and started making mistakes. The other lads were on his case because it just seemed like his concentration went when he got tired. I’m not worried about that though, this is new to him and playing full back in this team is demanding as fuck. I thought he looked a little uncomfortable defensively on occasion and that’s something to keep an eye on over the next few weeks until Robbo is back. He’ll have sterner tests than this (Chelsea especially), but I thought this was a good start for him. Star man is Mo. Easy one that. For a while Trent was possibly running him close but by the end it was clear. Top class from him. I have to end on a bit of a sour note though. The “Chelsea Rent Boy” chant directed at Billy Gilmour. *sigh* Firstly, it’s 2021 and that chant belongs firmly in the past. 99% of those signing it aren’t even meaning it in any kind of homophobic way but it doesn’t matter. Just pack it in. I’ve got to be honest though, I think I’m more embarrassed that they were chanting it at Billy Gilmore than I am by the chant itself. What the fuck is that about? Unless he did something to incur the wrath of the away end that we weren’t privy to on the TV coverage, this is just incredibly small time and smacks of United fans giving abuse to the likes of Jordon Ibe or Harry Wilson just because they happened to play for us. Billy Gilmour isn’t John Terry, lads. Sort it out, we’re better than that. Tell you what though, I cannot fucking wait until next weekend now. Seeing the TLW lads outside the ground before the game (most of us haven’t seen each other for 18 months!!), being back in my season ticket seat watching the boys again. It can’t come soon enough. Plus we really owe Burnley a spanking after the last two games we’ve had against them at Anfield. Fucking bring it on. Team: Alisson; Alexander-Arnold, Matip, Van Dijk, Robertson; Milner, Oxlade-Chamberlain (Fabinho), Keita (Elliott); Salah, Jota (Firmino), Mané: Please note that this is a FREE sample and Match Reports are usually only available to website subscribers. Subscriptions cost just £2 a month (you need to register first) and can be purchased here.
  14. 26 points
    We built 3 stadiums, at least. Four maybe. We only left Anfield because it was too small. Our new stadium is going to be a 50,00 seater. Well, 60,000 actually. And it will have its own jetty for luxury cruise liners to come and visit. It's opening next season. Well, this season, really. And it will host concerts by all the biggest stars. Sting. Sade. Prince. They've all confirmed. I've got my tickets already. I'm mates with Uncle Uzzy, see. The Redshites heads have all fell off. Not that you ever see them, because they all live in Norway. There used to be about 10 of them in Liverpool, but I twatted 8 of them and put the other 5 on a bus to Preston. Uncle Uzzy told me we're going to win the transfer window again this year. He invited me onto his yacht and there was a party there with Lionel Messy, Gillian MmmBop, Alf Inge Haaland, Andros Townsend, the lot. They're all signing. We're definitely winning the Champions League this year. If we don't, it's a UEFA conspiracy. Powers that be, y'see. Bastards.
  15. 26 points
    You don't need to know where he lives to know where he lives. But they do know where he lives...
  16. 25 points
  17. 24 points
    I've had a bump in the road with my remission. As part of my surveillance they picked up something on my scans before Xmas. So yesterday I had an operation to remove it. It could have been really tricky and despite a 7 hour op, I've got the best possible outcome. So I've just got to wait for the biopsy results and hopefully this is in the tail view mirror for me again.
  18. 24 points
    Who controls the British crown?Who keeps the school of science down?We do, we doWho keeps UNESCO off the maps?Who keeps the UEFA under wraps?We do, we doWho holds back the elctric car?Who makes Steven Gerrard a star?We do, we doWho put the fish on the site?Who rigs every Cup draw?We do, we do!
  19. 24 points
    They don't seem to do as well when the opposition gets to take as many penalties as they do.
  20. 23 points
  21. 23 points
    I wasn't sure where to post this. Some of you might remember me posting about my youngest Grandson a while back. He has Downs Syndrome and as a result he is way behind where a non Downs child would be. He's two and a half and has a lot of needs and my lad and his partner are working miracles with him. They were told he would have extreme difficulty walking. Well today, the little lad gave the experts the finger and walked. I couldn't love or be more proud of him if I tried.
  22. 23 points
    Another theory: Rafa is 15 years past his prime and the Everton board have no fucking idea what they're doing.
  23. 23 points
  24. 23 points
  25. 23 points



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