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Showing content with the highest reputation on 06/03/20 in all areas

  1. Just won my second CAMRA award. Leeds pub of the month for March. Get the fuck in.
    19 points
  2. He is massively important for Atletico - that is the kind of game where the keeper may need to make a single worldie save.
    9 points
  3. I really had to force myself to stick match of the day on and get stuck into this. Usually I quite look forward to Thursday’s and doing the Round Up, but this week I didn’t really want to do it at all. Because we lost a game. I didn’t want to sit through MOTD even though I knew at the end they’d be showing a league table with us 22 points clear at the top. Talk about split. This is the first time this season that I’m writing a round up in a week when we’ve lost. Shit, I’ve only had to write one time after a week in which we’ve drawn, and we’re in fucking March! Although it hardly ever happens, losing really doesn’t feel nice and I’ve not handled it particularly well this week. That seems pretty bad on the surface. Fans of everyone else have seen their team lose plenty and draw even more. Out of curiosity I had a look at the league records of the top teams in the there divisions. Championship leaders West Brom have lost five and drawn twelve!! Second placed Leeds have lost eight and drawn eight. In League One leaders Coventry have only lost three but they’ve drawn 13. The top team in League Two, Swindon, have lost eight times. We’ve lost one and drawn one, and I’m sat here struggling to motivate myself. In a way it’s a good thing as there was a time not so long ago when it happened so frequently that I was becoming used to it. It’s much better to be over-reacting to a rare defeat than to just be shrugging it off as “yeah we lost again”. That being said, it’s time for me to man the fuck up and just get on with it, so without further ado, here’s what happened last weekend. I’ll start with Friday night’s game at Carrow Road where Norwich pulled off an upset win over slumping Leicester. That Iheanacho cunt had a goal ludicrously disallowed due to that terrible new ‘attacking player handball’ rule. The ball comes off the arm of defender and brushed Iheanacho’s hand before he runs through and scores. I hate that new rule, it’s pure shite and goals like that should never be disallowed unless a) it’s Wolves, just because it’s funny, or b) it’s Iheanacho because he’s a fucking scumbag and any goal he ever scores should be disallowed purely on the basis of that. He wasn’t happy about it but tough shit. If he wants to score goals so much then he shouldn’t have deliberately missed that chance against City last season then, should he? Cunt. Norwich won it when their full backs went all Trent and Robbo, as Aarons crossed to the far side of the box and Lewis lashed one into the bottom corner. Lovely goal that. Onto Saturday now, and a cracking game at Bournemouth saw them share the spoils with Chelsea after a ding dong battle that ebbed and flowed both ways. Chelsea went ahead through Alonso, who seems to be scoring every week lately. Thumping finish it was too. He then put one on a plate for Giroud but he scuffed his finish. It was all Chelsea up to this point but Lerma headed in from a corner to level things up. Cavallero should have saved that, but it wasn’t a penalty so he didn’t, the fucking bum. Josh King tapped in at the back post after a lovely flowing move to make it 2-1 and Eddie Howe’s men looked to be on their way to a huge three points until Alonso popped up again to score with five minutes left. He nearly won it for them too but headed wide. He’s completely unique. He’s a goal hanging full back and I love that because he clearly doesn’t give a fuck. He reminds me of me. Any time I had to play full back when I was a kid I’d just think “fuck this shit, I’m a goalscorer, you don’t stick me at full back” and I’d just go up front. I’ve never seen anyone do that at professional level though so fair play to him. Palace edged out Brighton in the weekend’s biggest grudge match. The beef between these two is great because there’s no real justification for it. It started in the 70s because managers Alan Mullery and Terry Venables didn’t get on and there was a contentious FA Cup tie between them. A Palace fan threw hot coffee over Mullery at the end and he emptied the change from his pocket and shouted “that’s all you’re worth, Crystal Palace”. That’s where it began but it’s escalated over the years (the highlight being when someone from Brighton had a massive shit in the Palace dressing room) and it’s still going on and now. They fucking hate each other and it’s hilarious. It’s not as funny as the Coventry / Sunderland beef that was caused by Jimmy Hill. I’ve written about that before, can’t be arsed going over it again so let me dig it out…. Ok, this is what I wrote in the Diary a while back… The funniest story I’ve heard about Sunderland this year was it all kicking off outside when they went to Coventry. My bother in law went and I got a text after the game telling me there was murder everywhere. I assumed it was because when you venture below the Championship it’s still the 1980s but he kept going on about “Jimmy Hill's fault, the big chinny bastard”. I had no idea what he was on about, until he later sent me a link to an article explaining it all. It’s fucking gold. Sunderland and Coventry have major beef going back to the 70s and Jimmy Hill is indeed the cause of it all. Both teams were involved in a relegation fight on the final day of the season, and Hill had Coventry’s game put back 15 minutes due to non-existent crowd congestion. Sunderland lost, meaning Coventry and their opponents (who were also in danger of going down) knew that a draw would see them both safe and the Mackems relegated. The final 15 minutes were like Germany / Austria in the 1982 World Cup, with neither team coming out of their own half. Sunderland went down and they’ve never forgiven Jimmy Hill. That wasn’t the cause for the fighting though, it was Coventry’s revelling in it that tipped Sunderland fans over the edge. Coventry had a big flag with Hill’s face on it covering a third of the empty seats in the home end, and according to my brother in law “they kept flashing his ugly big chinny bastard face up on the scoreboard" just to wind up the away fans. You might have seen the video that went viral of a drunk Sunderland standing in front of the Jimmy Hill statue and shouting “ya fuckin cheatin’ cunt” at it before he was moved on by a bizzie. Hilarious stuff. I love old standing beef like this, it’s fucking boss. Sunderland and Coventry absolutely fucking hate each other because of something Jimmy Hill did in the 1970s. How great is that? Ironically, on the same weekend Palace were playing Brighton, the Jimmy Hill Derby took place too (for the record, Coventry won it). Zaha was asked recently “on a scale of 1-10 how much do you hate Brighton?” and he replied “11”. You could tell because he was even more petulant and wound up than usual and Brighton sub Scheloto was booked for kicking the ball at him. He wasn’t even playing, he warming up but he still successfully managed to wind up Zaha and get him booked. Doesn’t take much to wind up Zaha really. He’s a weird one as he gets the absolute shit kicked off him every week and mostly just gets on with it, but then he reacts to the most stupid, innocuous things. Scheloto did that classic shithouse South American thing of holding his hands up and looking utterly bewildered as though he had no idea why Zaha was angry. I love all that, but VAR has more or less killed off the dark arts. Can’t get away with that kind of shithousery any more. Brighton had by far the better of the chances (24 shots) but their finishing was brutal and they got hit with a sucker punch when Ayew ran clear and scored. Brighton are well coached, well organised, but they just don’t have enough up front. Good coaching will get you up the pitch but when you get there that’s when flair and talent is needed, and they don’t have enough of it. A few weeks back when we looked at West Ham’s upcoming fixtures, it was difficult to see where they’d even pick up a point. Then the wheels kind of fell off Southampton and that fixture didn’t look anywhere near as difficult as it would have been not so long ago. And so it proved. West Ham had a comfortable, and much needed win. Jarrod Bowen put them in front when he made a diagonal run behind the defence from right to left and then clipped the ball past the keeper with his left foot. It was an almost identical situation to the one he had at Anfield last week when he could have made it 3-3. The difference? This time he wasn’t facing the mighty Alisson. Obafemi equalised when he converted a Ward-Prowse cut back. I really like Ward-Prowse but I’m not sure playing him right back is the best idea in the world, especially when he’s up against someone like Antonio. Bit of a mis-match like. Antonio claimed an assist on West Ham’s second but really that assist should go to the Saints keeper McCarthy, who was out jumped by Haller who then did well to reach the loose ball and convert from a tight angle. Shades of the ‘Hand of God’ about that one, except Haller is about a foot taller than Maradona and didn’t use his hand. So, if McCarthy looked stupid there and is rightly being blamed for it, can someone tell me how that cunt Shilton has somehow managed to mostly avoid blame for being out jumped by a munchkin? I don’t care if Diego used his hand. Shilton can use his hands too and he’s much taller. Instead of the English media and England fans continually whining about little Diego cheating, they should have hounded Shilton out of the country. All that cunt does is tweet about Brexit and Maradona. Fucking hate him you know. Stupid curly haired fuck. Anyway, my boy Antonio then ran through the middle to make it 3-1 and that’s how it finished. Newcastle and Burnley finished 0-0, which will have come as a surprise to absolutely nobody. Four games in a row without a goal for the Geordies, although they deserved more than they got from this one as they dominated from start to finish. Almiron is playing great at the moment but he can’t score. Unless he’s playing Championship sides in the cup that is. If they go down he’ll tear it up next season. Him and Dwight Gayle will probably score 60 between them. If they stay up they’ll be lucky to score six. Still, that’s five more than Joelinton is likely to get. The normally mild mannered Steve Bruce lost his rag with a reporter in midweek after they beat West Brom in the cup. The Daily Mail had ran a story claiming Bruce had a bust up with Saint-Maximin and he dropped him for the Burnley game. Bruce was furious because it was total bollocks. He wanted the reporter to admit he got it wrong but he wouldn’t. Fucking snide that. You write something that’s not true then at least have the decency to say you were misinformed and apologise. The only surprise to me is it wasn’t the S*n. You know you’re a cunt when even Steve Bruce is having a go at you though. He’s probably second only to Eddie Howe in the mild mannered nice guy stakes. Onto Sunday now. Bergwijn gave Spurs the lead at home to Wolves but Doherty equalised when he drifted into the centre forward position and finished from close range. Aurier restored Spurs’ lead when he cut inside and bent one just inside the far post but Wolves drew level again when Doherty got in behind and his cross-shot was converted on the line by Jota. My boy Traore played a huge part in that the build up to that. So strong and quick. Jota then turned provider as he picked out Jimenez in the box, and the Mexican finished in some style to send Wolves above Spurs in the table. Frankly I have no idea how they were behind them in the first place, as Spurs seem to lose every week. Mourinho’s honeymoon period is becoming shorter and shorter with every club he joins. He lasted about a month at Spurs before he went straight to “sour faced, miserable, abrasive cunt” mode. He’s obviously had enough of people telling him he should be picking Troy Parrott and he actually said this week that most Spurs fans don’t even know what he looks like. Firstly that’s insulting, and secondly even if that was true, it’s because he never fucking picks him! Then they got knocked out of the cup by Norwich and he responded by saying he’s going to tell the board they need to choose between the Burnley game this weekend, or Leipzig next week, because they can’t concentrate on both. Spurs made a monumental fucking mistake hiring him and it’s going to be fun watching this unravel. Speaking of fun, that ending to the Everton / United game was fucking great. I didn’t want either of them to win so the draw was a good outcome. Everton getting completely screwed in the last minute was just an added bonus. It all started with another De Gea howler. He took too long with his clearance and it was charged down by Calvert-Lewin. The ball could have gone anywhere but hilariously it went in the net. De Gea wants his arse kicking for that though, the complacent cunt. While everyone was talking about him and the massive drop off in his game, at the other end Jordan Pickford was saying “hold my beer” as he dived over the top of a Bruno Fernandes 30 yarder. Minutes earlier he was lucky not to concede a penalty as he punched Maguire in his big stupid head about two seconds before the ball arrived. The ref gave him the free-kick, which was astonishing really. Everton thought they’d won it late on when Maguire deflected a Calvert-Lewin shot into his own net. United appealed for offside but the linesman’s flag stayed down so the Blues celebrated wildly. And then VAR said “nah, fuck you Everton. For years you didn’t want to beat United so now that you do, tough shit”. It was one of the strangest ones of the season. Technically the decision was apparently right (according to most experts, although Clattenberg bucked the trend by saying it was a good goal), but there are so many layers to it that I don’t know how to feel about it. Other than amused, obviously. Firstly, Sigurdsson was fouled after he got his shot off (more on this shortly). If he was injured rather than just lying on the ground, would that have made a difference? Genuine question, because I don’t know the answer. Secondly, the offside rule changed whereby if the ball intentionally comes off a defender then it resets the phase of play and the attacker cannot be offside. This is why Kane wasn’t deemed offside against us a couple of years ago when the ball nicked off Lovren on the way through. Maguire plays at that ball. His foot moves slightly towards the ball, just as Lovren’s did. So by that stupid fucking rule (which is absolute bollocks and needs scrapping), surely Sigurdsson shouldn’t be offside. Apparently they adjudged that Maguire didn’t intentionally play at it though. So then the question is whether Sigurdsson is in the eye line of De Gea. The common misconception is that the player needs to be blocking the view of the keeper, but it’s more complex than that. It’s whether the player’s presence is something the keeper needs to take into consideration and therefore impacts his decision making. It’s bullshit really as we see players deemed to not be interfering all the time, even though they are in the keeper’s eyeline. Does Sigurdsson impact De Gea’s decision making? Not in the slightest. He’s going to his right to make a save, the ball defects the other way and he’s wrong footed. Yes, Sigurdsson has to lift his legs up to avoid blocking the ball, but it makes no difference to the outcome of the play. The part that would really stick in my craw if I was a Blue is that Sigurdsson was only on the ground because a United player put him there with a late tackle after the ball had gone. Technically it’s a foul and would be anywhere else on the pitch. Inside the box though, you never get a foul for that. It would piss you off though if the only reason you were offside is because a defender fouled you and put you there. The main reason you’d be pissed off if you were Sigurdsson though is that De Gea was not saving that anyway, so you have to say that morally - if not necessarily legally - that’s a goal that should have stood. You know what though, Sigurdsson just sits there and makes no attempt to get out of the way, so fuck him. If he’d got up and tried to get back onside it might have been different, but he didn’t and instead we all got to piss ourselves laughing at Everton. Again. Still, they’ll always have our loss at Watford to look back on. The hilarity didn’t end with that decision though. It continued after full time when Ancelotti wanted to know why it was disallowed and went onto the field to ask the linesman and ref for an explanation. They wouldn’t answer him and you can see Carlo saying “No, I stay here”. Chris Kavanagh had other ideas and gave him a red card before repeatedly saying “off you go, off you go”. Even Mike Dean would have struggled to match those levels of "officious traffic warden-ness". Ancelotti is not one of those managers you see acting like a twat and he deserved to be treated with more respect than that. Even afterwards in his interview he was jovial and jokey about it. He's one of the good ones. Chris Kavanagh is not. Finally, I’m sick of the love in for Andre Gomes, who made his comeback in this game (and made such a massive contribution that the only mention of him was when his name flashed up after being subbed). So he got injured, big fucking deal. People were reacting like he’d had both legs amputated and his career was over, but players get worse injuries than that all the time. He was only out for a few months. Would anyone have been arsed if he looked like Luke Chadwick? I’ve been saying for fucking ages that this fella gets by entirely on his looks. His entire career is based on being handsome. He’s a massive fraud.
    8 points
  4. They can’t shut the schools now. I still haven’t recovered from the half term.
    6 points
  5. I've supported Liverpool all of my life, as my dad did, his dad and his dad before him. I come from a long line of Liverpool fans who hate our players. My great grandad despised Elisha Scott, as my grandfather despised Billy Liddel after him; so, I'm not interested in letting some Sky Gen, knicker wetting, soft southern fairy, super James Blunt fan supporting arsehole named fucking Zebedee cast aspersions on me and my family's right to support this football club as we have and always will.
    6 points
  6. ‘That’s the supermarket done, now, next stop the solicitors to change that will. Won’t take long’
    4 points
  7. I take a blind bloke shopping and he does this, chats away to the cashier about nothing. When I once tried to discreetly tell him him there was a queue behind him he said "fuck em, they're probably old cunts with nothing to rush for" Hes 83, I let him get on with it.
    4 points
  8. I met my first girlfriend 18 months ago in town , first time in 43 years, it was the weirdest mad thing not knowing what to expect. She was still lovely and I became a blithering idiot but after while we got relaxed and had a great time , we met in the Globe at 12pm and left at 8pm , we then met 4 more times but as she was married she called time on it , rightly so, it was just meeting for a drink in town but we both started feeling like teenagers again . Im now gutted all over again now , as I was I was choogling along nicely and all of a sudden I’ve been derailed, spending my time thinking if only done this or that , or if I’d of gone wherever ,things could of been different . It can be a dangerous thing to meet someone as I did , Bittersweet is the word I believe.
    4 points
  9. Even though I’m well in the enhanced at risk group and feel irony insists Coronavirus must kill me this year, my Mum has just got back from Tenerife so it’s given me 14 days grace from meeting up. To be fair, a few thousand dead is probably worth it.
    3 points
  10. A girl called Anita from primary school. She gave me a 1978 Mario Kempes sticker and stuck it on the back of my snorkel Parker. She lived in a flat above the shops. The end.
    3 points
  11. When he was playing. From day one. Although I never suspected it at the time, the match fixing accusations seemed believable when they came out. Think I’ve mentioned it on here before but when I was a young kid, he threw the CSKA game in the European cup and I was fuming. Had an argument in the school yard the next day with my superfan mate who told me he was better than my dad. I had no reply and still don’t and I’ve carried that grudge since I was 7 years old.
    3 points
  12. Not happening that much this season but it continues to surprise me how much our own players are hated by fans, especially those that are injured a lot (I don't think they are happy about the situation either). How do you feel when a hated player scores? Have you changed your mind on someone you hate? I can only remember ever hating one of our players; Nicky Tanner. I was pretty young and I remember hoping he'd get sent off he was such a liability.
    2 points
  13. Never had any problems, just ask nice enough, don’t be a dickhead and look interested usually gets you far enough for her to forget that most men are cunts, but one night I had the opportunity with one of the most stunning women I think had ever been blessed upon this earth. For years I’d seen her, in passing, in clubs, at gigs, parties etc and she was always with her boyfriend. Over 3/4 years I’d probably seen her a couple of dozen times and we’d always made, hesitant, eyes and I’d never forgotten. Then one night she walked over to me and just started to dance with me, amazing.... except I’d taken a fuckload of LSD about half hour previously and my only response was ‘you’re not going to like me like this I’m bad and broken. Can I have your hair?’ or words to that effect. I still remember the look of sheer disappointment on her face. Didn’t see her ever again.
    2 points
  14. Might look for a house soon with period features. Although to be fair to my missus, she hates that nickname.
    2 points
  15. You couldn't outpoint him by k.o in Vegas.
    2 points
  16. Calm yourselves. We’ve plenty of time to get back into this. Show some faith.
    2 points
  17. As an expert in LFC injury announcements I can confirm Alisson is dead. RIP YNWA
    2 points
  18. I hated narcos, I watched the first 2 seasons and couldn't muster up tit energy to watch another. Just the same old shit, rehashed over and over. But each to their own
    2 points
  19. I kind of agree that in 2020 we probably shouldn't be objectifying beaver.
    2 points
  20. Just seen the new KFC advert showing people eating and then licking their fingers. Fair play to the fuckers, tearing up the Corona virus guidelines. Renegades.
    2 points
  21. Saunders has long been in danger of his wasting his career, what with the lengthy periods of inactivity, 1 or 2 fights a year when he's young and being an absolute and utter fucking dickhead in general, but there's a bit of the Fury's about him in the sense he's one of those who'll only look better as his calibre of opponent rises. Fury often used to look highly average when he was fighting average boxers, it's when he's stepped up in levels he's looked his best. I can see Saunders being much the same, not least because his focus has blatantly been terrible for much of his career but definitely won't be for this one. He doesn't "live the life" between fights as it is, let alone when there's been times he's clearly not fully committed to his camp and has looked sluggish and plodding against fighters not in his class. Obviously it's about levels, but his training and focus was widely said to be absolutely spot on for the Lemieux camp when he was with Dominic Ingle's stable. While Lemieux is nowhere near Canelo's level, it's no coincidence that's considered Saunders best performance to date. Just can't see him not putting everything in and being at his very best and sharpest against Canelo, and, like Fury, he'll have been fighting since before he could walk. He's also been after this or GGG for about 3 years and you could see how demotivated he was to take other fights instead. I think he'll put on a very good account of himself and surprise a lot of people, performance-wise. And I say that as someone who'd love to see him get wiped out.
    2 points
  22. Tough situation, but it's one that's been addressed by the philosopher/poet Enrique Iglesias. Would you dance if I asked you to dance? Or would you run and never look back? Would you cry if you saw me crying? And would you save my soul tonight? Would you tremble if I touched your lips? Or would you laugh? Oh, please tell me this Now would you die for the one you love? Oh hold me in your arms tonight I can be your hero baby I can kiss away the pain I will stand by you forever You can take my breath away
    2 points
  23. How much good could Bloomberg and Steyer have done with the $600m+ they blew on self-aggrandisement.
    2 points
  24. I agree , there again it's my fault for marrying her.
    2 points
  25. I worked on a bank counter for a few years and used to find this really awkward , but felt really embarrassed once when a guy said he loved talking to me about the football and I was the only person he spoke to most weeks.
    2 points
  26. JP McManus bought a horse yesterday, Alfa Mix is the name and it's entered into the Coral Cup and the Martin Pipe. Trained by Gavin Cromwell who is having a good season. He doesn't just buy horses unless he really thinks there's a chance of a prize. Was available at 25/1 yesterday for the Coral, now 10/1. I've backed it at 20/1 but could be one to keep an eye on.
    2 points
  27. "No one grows up wanting to be Gary Neville". Except Roger.
    2 points
  28. What position in the queue were you?
    2 points
  29. On the Pickford-Maguire thing you mentioned, it's physically impossible to NOT catch that massive slabhead even if you do have tiny arms. On the Shilton-Maradona thing, you're right that he doesn't get nearly enough criticism for going into lumbering oaf mode when challenging for that ball. It's like he couldn't get off the ground at all from a standing start. Same with when he conceded from a deflected Brehme free kick in the 1990 semi final. He was practically standing on his goal line and still somehow managed to get lobbed. David Seaman was a bit like that at times. Incredibly agile one moment, concrete-booted oaf the next.
    2 points
  30. Also had a little chuckle because I was able to throw in one of my favourite quotes from Step Brothers. "Stupid curly haired fuck" is an all timer.
    2 points
  31. Poulson quarantined a decade too late.
    2 points
  32. I hate Liverpool FC, not any single player. No, wait...
    2 points
  33. Close. The. Motherfucking. Thread.
    2 points
  34. Didn't realise it was that gormless twat Kavanagh that sent off Ancelotti. Before going on to confirm his complete and utter twatishness on Tuesday night. Absolutely no-one will be surprised to learn that he comes from......... Manchester.
    2 points
  35. Top, top Peter Shilton analysis there, Dave.
    2 points
  36. That's what happens when you give young lads star bucks.
    2 points
  37. Isabel (six months old senorita from mexico) lording over her new empire, with her yucatecan boyfriend (furnando) and arch rival for the throne (tabitha) below....
    2 points
  38. It's shitty behaviour, but I like to go all Columbo and solve the crime. "Hmmm, Galaxy chocolate, amongst the vitamins... A woman's chocolate. Lacks imagination, middle aged. She's overweight, and guilty. Third shelf up, meaning she's average height. She chose the vitamins because to leave it next to the Vagisil was too damning." Then you make eye contact with the most likely suspect at the tills. I'm fucking onto you. Alleviates some of the boredom of shopping anyway.
    2 points
  39. Like something Noddy would wear for playing tennis.
    2 points
  40. Three years in and I've just picked up Leeds CAMRA Pub of the Month which is a fairly big deal for us.
    2 points
  41. We were born within one hour of each other. Our mothers said we could be sister and brother. Her name was Deborah. It never suited her. They said that when we grew up we'd get married, and never split up. But we never did do, although I often think of her. Her house was very small, With wood chip on the wall. When I came around to call she didn't notice me at all. She was the first girl at school to get breasts. My mate TK421 said that she was the best. The boys all loved her, but I was a mess. I had to watch them trying to get her undressed. We were just friends, and that was as far as it went. I fid used to walk her home sometimes but it meant nothing to her, because she was so popular. It would never have worked. There's probably a song in there, somewhere.
    2 points
  42. Big injuries against Spanish sides with a plus goal average from the first leg. It’s what we do.
    1 point
  43. Snowfall season 1 - 8/10 Very enjoyable show, they've done a great job incorporating the cartels, the CIA and the hood crack dealers. Franklins a great character.
    1 point
  44. The only way we should be looking to sell is if we know something about his medical issues that we feel like we could leverage to get a better deal than we should. He's been unfit but when he plays has been excellent. So it comes down to whether the sports scientists and doctors think he's likely to be fit more often in the future or whether they think he's likely to continue to have these problems.
    1 point
  45. Off you go Dier. It's an early shower for you.
    1 point
  46. The Victorians used to enjoy a day out looking at the patients in Bedlam but I bet they didn't go every week.
    1 point



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