Have a rant thread

[Dave D]

5 hours ago, Lee909 said:

Fuck me i gone back 4 pages to see what all this shit about and i still not got a fucking clue. Not one thing seem to have been said bar people calling each other cunts. I need some context 

 

I learnt that Champ is called Cath. Actual gender not specified. 

 

   

[Captain Turdseye]

[AngryOfTuebrook]

11 hours ago, Dave D said:

 

I learnt that Champ is called Cath. Actual gender not specified. 

 

   

I reckon you need to put Clem's picture up behind the bar in the TLW Tavern.

[Dave D]

9 hours ago, AngryOfTuebrook said:

I reckon you need to put Clem's picture up behind the bar in the TLW Tavern.

It’s a bit of a headache as him and Stig are both on the entertainment committee 

[VladimirIlyich]

46 minutes ago, Dave D said:

It’s a bit of a headache as him and Stig are both on the entertainment committee 

I think they fell out about which gender of stripper to get to perform last time and the 'ladyboy' idea caused a riot among the clentelle.

[Dave D]

They will patch things up soon. In reminds me of the time they had a furious row about our finger buffet for an event- whether the sandwiches should be cut into squares or triangles.      

[Dave D]

Dont even mention the 2022 Marrow Competition furore.    

[Bob]

Back to rants which make some sense...

 

I've just paid £630 pounds quid for a ducking service, MOT and new rear brake discs and pads on a car I won't own in 6 weeks time.

 

I was given an initial order date for my new EV of mid may, but thats now late July/early August and MOTs up before then, and (in fairness) service is overdue.

 

Fucking stings.

[Section_31]

3 minutes ago, Bob said:

Back to rants which make some sense...

 

I've just paid £630 pounds quid for a ducking service, MOT and new rear brake discs and pads on a car I won't own in 6 weeks time.

 

I was given an initial order date for my new EV of mid may, but thats now late July/early August and MOTs up before then, and (in fairness) service is overdue.

 

Fucking stings.

 

I had a business idea years ago for a business networking site for every profession except mechanics, where everyone can conspire to rip them off. So they'd come in to your coffee shop for a brew and you'd rub your chin and go "that'll be 12 quid plus vat", then they'd get on the bus and the driver would be like "that's 15 quid to town all in."

[Bjornebye]

On 25/06/2024 at 09:55, Dave D said:

Dont even mention the 2022 Marrow Competition furore.    

look I thought it would fit ok 

[Lee909]

On 28/01/2015 at 12:38, Section_31 said:

 even plump for Nutella. 

 

I'm sold

The best advert for Nutella that's never been used

[Bjornebye]

The lad in A Quiet Place. Especially in part 2. Catching up on it before we stick the new one on in a bit and I forgot how much I hate this curly haired little screaming, over curious, snitching, whining, wimpy little bastard. “Be quiet or aliens will grab us and kill us and your sister and a new born baby”  cunt acts like he’s on Fun House

[Bjornebye]

What is it with men who take up proper cycling automatically becoming jumped up arseholes? I take the lad down the ralla sometimes and because he’s a dope and doesn’t understand move out the way I get hold of his collar when a bike is going past. Guaranteed a “ta mate” of everyone, people going to work local scalls even smackheads. But not the cunts with all the gear on. Fucking creepy entitled dickless bellends. 

[Rushies tash]

2 hours ago, Bjornebye said:

What is it with men who take up proper cycling automatically becoming jumped up arseholes? I take the lad down the ralla sometimes and because he’s a dope and doesn’t understand move out the way I get hold of his collar when a bike is going past. Guaranteed a “ta mate” of everyone, people going to work local scalls even smackheads. But not the cunts with all the gear on. Fucking creepy entitled dickless bellends. 

 

We get them down by me of a weekend, riding 3 abreast down the middle of the road, presumably imagining that they're in the Tour de France or whatever, but in reality doing 10 mph and pissing everyone off.

[Bjornebye]

7 minutes ago, Rushies tash said:

 

We get them down by me of a weekend, riding 3 abreast down the middle of the road, presumably imagining that they're in the Tour de France or whatever, but in reality doing 10 mph and pissing everyone off.

And they bark like mad when you ask them to move over honestly a fucking bane on society I basically see Jeremy Vine in every one of the motherfuckers entitled wankers. Someone on here once described one as a Lycra Clad Twat Missile and it was poetic. 

[Rushies tash]

4 minutes ago, Bjornebye said:

And they bark like mad when you ask them to move over honestly a fucking bane on society I basically see Jeremy Vine in every one of the motherfuckers entitled wankers. Someone on here once described one as a Lycra Clad Twat Missile and it was poetic. 

 

Ha ha, "Lycra clad twat missiles". That's brilliant!

[RJ Fan club]

Packs of middle aged Lycra fat cunts on bikes do my head in.
 

We live next to Ditchling Beacon and because it was once a category climb on the Tour de France in the early 90’s it attracts all the flabby Lycra brigade every weekend.

 

i don’t even bother driving up the beacon during the summer, it’s not worth it, it’s full of fat cunts walking or snails pacing a bike up it.

 

Its not exactly Alp d’Huez either, it’s 250m high and was the lowest cat climb they do, think they only gave it a classification out of sympathy tbh 

[lifetime fan]

Some fucking dribble chin between Yatton and Plymouth has walked off the train with my suitcase. 
 

I can’t even call them a thieving cunt as all that was in there was a load of golden beetroot from my step dad. 
 

Thick cunts. 

[redinblack]

On 14/08/2024 at 18:39, Bjornebye said:

And they bark like mad when you ask them to move over honestly a fucking bane on society I basically see Jeremy Vine in every one of the motherfuckers entitled wankers. Someone on here once described one as a Lycra Clad Twat Missile and it was poetic. 

I was walking to the train station one morning and I crossed the street looking for oncoming traffic from the expected direction off a one way street. Suddenly a cyclist is on me from the opposite way telling me to "watch where I am walking". I gave him the witty riposte of "fuck off piss face". It wasnt Oscar Wilde but it was all I could muster in the circumstances.

[Bjornebye]

29 minutes ago, redinblack said:

I was walking to the train station one morning and I crossed the street looking for oncoming traffic from the expected direction off a one way street. Suddenly a cyclist is on me from the opposite way telling me to "watch where I am walking". I gave him the witty riposte of "fuck off piss face". It wasnt Oscar Wilde but it was all I could muster in the circumstances.

One crashed into my arm in Hammersmith years back. Proper hurt it did and all. Prick got off his bike and blamed me (I’ll be honest it was probably my fault I was looking at my phone and didn’t see him) he quickly got back on it when I put my backpack on the floor. Thankfully. I had an arm out of action and he wasn’t the smallest cunt. More of a rant at twats paying too much attention to their phone than where they’re going to be honest. Thank fuck it wasn’t a car 

[Paulie Dangerously]

Beach cunts.  

 

Smoking, littering, taking up the whole front playing cunt tennis, shouting, space invading, arguing with life guards, pulling octopus out of the sea to show off knobheads. 

 

Always the Italians 

 

 

[VladimirIlyich]

2 hours ago, Paulie Dangerously said:

Beach cunts.  

 

Smoking, littering, taking up the whole front playing cunt tennis, shouting, space invading, arguing with life guards, pulling octopus out of the sea to show off knobheads. 

 

Always the Italians 

 

 

At least the Octopus wont go to waste.

[Section_31]

2 hours ago, Paulie Dangerously said:

Beach cunts.  

 

Smoking, littering, taking up the whole front playing cunt tennis, shouting, space invading, arguing with life guards, pulling octopus out of the sea to show off knobheads. 

 

Always the Italians 

 

 

 

I'm not into the beach as my skin tone makes the man from Homepride look like Sidney Poitier, but isn't that what the beach is for? Games, japes and general fucking around? 

[Paulie Dangerously]

43 minutes ago, Section_31 said:

 

I'm not into the beach as my skin tone makes the man from Homepride look like Sidney Poitier, but isn't that what the beach is for? Games, japes and general fucking around? 

 

Not smoking, littering and disregard for anyone else. Keep that shit to your own beach.  Don't have one? Be polite-o

[Section_31]

People queueing at bars. What fresh hell is this?