Have a rant thread

[Unrighteous]

Cunting gusts of wind when you're holding a brollie.

 

You're walking down the street, the rain is coming down, and then a gust of wind near pulls the fucking thing from your hands.

 

Cunting fucking wind! Fuck off!

 

Fucking annoying.

[Scrump]

Just turned up to my kid's school "Christmas Fair" just to be told he's not allowed out of class until 3:15. Why advertise it for 2:30 then? Why the fuck would I want to hang around a school hall for 45 minutes looking at shit second hand toys and books, and cakes? I'm sure the fucking Head here hates the parents almost as much as she clearly hates the kids. And it's pissing down with rain. Had to leave, but now fucking soaked. Fuming.

[ZonkoVille77]

I have the misfortune of having to take the bus to work now whereas I used to drive before. Fucking stupid noisy pricks playing gangnam style or Titanium on repeat on their phones at full blast. I'd love to chop them up. My earphones are not good enough to drown out all sounds so I need an upgrade.

 

And getting on a bus when its packed and seeing some stupid cunt putting their bag on the seat beside them, thus preventing anyone else taking the seat. Like they are so fucking important not to have anyone sitting beside them.

 

Chuck Norris round house special for the lot of the fuckers. Can't wait for the digital Chuck Norris special to be invented so I can just text or email someone a round house to the chops.

[Robbo29]

i always make a point of sitting where people have put bags on seats, just go up and ask them to move it, one small vicory against the knobs of this world

[Guest davelfc]

Opticians, what a joke.

 

Use reading glasses for 'reading' as I get older. Went to a different place and had my eyes tested but couldn't find my old script. Anyway paid a decent sum for memory titanium frames and decent lenses. They were made and I went to try them. Tried them on, couldn't see out of one eye.

 

Found my old script, went back to my original optician and discovered that the script I had previously with the ones that made the poor glasses was totally wrong. No wonder I couldn't see.

 

Took them back and got my money back after some gentle persuasion, incompetent crooks.

 

Now I've used a cheap but recommended website to test out this new script (although I am more confident) so as to not tie up that much cash again until I'm happy.

 

I'm sure some of them just guess.

[lifetime fan]

My ol fella gets his glasses from asda.

[Guest davelfc]

Once I've established that this script is good, with those cheap glasses. I'm grabbing some from Costco in Florida early next year. Very good prices.

[VladimirIlyich]

People who just put their dogs into the back garden and allow them to bark away all day without giving a shite about the neighbours.

 

If anybody wants a bit of a kip during the day due to night work or illness they have to endure the yapping of an animal whose owners seem oblivious to.

[Liverpool lad]

Weddings

 

If anyone can else all the fucking fuss over one day then let me know

[Champ]

Weddings

 

If anyone can else all the fucking fuss over one day then let me know

 

Not yours, I assume?

[Rico1304]

Cooking programmes - the ones with cameras in the fridge and cupboards. Chef says "we need some chicken" we see them walk towards the fridge, see them open the fridge and then get a shot from inside the fridge of them taking the fucking chicken out. I know what something looks like coming out if fridge, I don't need to shown it. Nigel fucking Slater must spend a month getting them out of every drawer, cupboard and fridge in his house.

[Guest davelfc]

Who are they aiming these cooking shows at? I don't watch that kind of shit so I can't really rant about it, however I'll have a go.

 

Most people consider cooking to be opening a tin, grabbing some chicken dinosaurs from the freezer or microwaving a ready meal.

 

I've got a show for you, 3 minutes, ping! We just need some twat in whites that swears and treats people like shit, better still a fat middle aged bloke that steals cheese.

 

Fuckin easy this tv show lark.

[Champ]

Cooking programmes - the ones with cameras in the fridge and cupboards. Chef says "we need some chicken" we see them walk towards the fridge, see them open the fridge and then get a shot from inside the fridge of them taking the fucking chicken out. I know what something looks like coming out if fridge, I don't need to shown it. Nigel fucking Slater must spend a month getting them out of every drawer, cupboard and fridge in his house.

 

And his shiny fridge only ever has about 3 things in it but thing that really bugs me about his programmes, well, there are several things actually, is how everything he uses is wrapped up in greaseproof paper, like he bought it all from artisan shops where everything is weighed by hand and wrapped to order. You dont buy butter like that anywhere, unless you got to the 1950s to buy it. You're a wee bit pretentious Nigel

[Section_31]

Cooking shows are an excellent shout. I can't fucking taste it so why should I give a fuck?

[Liverpool lad]

 

Not yours' date=' I assume?[/quote']

 

You won't see me going down that route

[Champ]

You won't see me going down that route

 

Is it the weddings nonsense (you can see where I stand on this) or the getting married bit or both you cant be doing with?

[Pony Princess]

Cooking programmes - the ones with cameras in the fridge and cupboards. Chef says "we need some chicken" we see them walk towards the fridge, see them open the fridge and then get a shot from inside the fridge of them taking the fucking chicken out. I know what something looks like coming out if fridge, I don't need to shown it. Nigel fucking Slater must spend a month getting them out of every drawer, cupboard and fridge in his house.

 

Good shout. It is like watching CSI where they put the camera inside / next to the forensic object of interest.

 

Annnd the fridge is opening.... oh shit here we go! And... he's got the chicken... watch out for the eggs.....he's got it and door closed successfully. Annnnnd cut. Good work everyone.

[Liverpool lad]

 

Is it the weddings nonsense (you can see where I stand on this) or the getting married bit or both you cant be doing with?

 

Both

[Adebisi]

Cunting gusts of wind when you're holding a brollie.

 

You're walking down the street, the rain is coming down, and then a gust of wind near pulls the fucking thing from your hands.

 

Cunting fucking wind! Fuck off!

 

Fucking annoying.

 

My mum works with mentally challenged folk and one of her patients suffered at the hands of the wind last night. She was holding a brollie, the wind caught her and sent her flying face first into a lamp-post.

 

She came in the house afterwards with her face drenched in blood. She didn't complain though. I dunno what she's made of, but she's taken big metal gates to the face and knocked out her top teeth and shrugged it off like nothing. Scary. I call her beast. Not to her face obviously, she'd kill me.

 

I do remember her getting dental work one day though. She could barely move her jaw and was in some discomfort. Anyway, she decides to tickle my 6 year old niece. Obviously my niece laughed and squirmed away until it got too much and one of her legs made contact with Beats' jaw. She didn't like that and she proceeded to chase my niece around the house. If she had caught her there would have been a murder that day. Make no mistake about it. She had that look in her eyes.

 

Her brothers are slow too. I remember once, legend has it, one of them was waiting for a bus when some youths, (2 lads and a girl) started giving him lip and insulted how he spoke and such (He has a very high pitched voice) anyway he lost his temper and kicked the ever loving shit out of the 3 of them. Apparently when the police arrived they had a hard time believing one (very slow) man could do that much damage and they thought he was covering for someone else.

 

Anyway these are all stories for another thread, I just got thinking and laughing.

[Champ]

I'm really not sure what to make of this post so I think I'm just going to pretend I didnt see it for the time being. I was looking for a bit of light relief on the GF.....this certainly isnt what I had in mind

[GodWearsNumber9]

People who constantly talk over movies. SHUT. THE FUCK. UP.

[Guest Pistonbroke]

People who constantly talk over movies. SHUT. THE FUCK. UP.

 

I was just watching a movie you cunt!! :whistle:

[md1892]

I'm really not sure what to make of this post so I think I'm just going to pretend I didnt see it for the time being. I was looking for a bit of light relief on the GF.....this certainly isnt what I had in mind

 

It made me laugh to be fair.

 

 

But i suppose i'm not normal.

[sir roger]

I have the misfortune of having to take the bus to work now whereas I used to drive before. Fucking stupid noisy pricks playing gangnam style or Titanium on repeat on their phones at full blast. I'd love to chop them up. My earphones are not good enough to drown out all sounds so I need an upgrade.

 

And getting on a bus when its packed and seeing some stupid cunt putting their bag on the seat beside them, thus preventing anyone else taking the seat. Like they are so fucking important not to have anyone sitting beside them.

 

Chuck Norris round house special for the lot of the fuckers. Can't wait for the digital Chuck Norris special to be invented so I can just text or email someone a round house to the chops.

 

The worst is when some vacuous bint talks shit at the top of her voice into her mobile phone for the whole journey.

[Harry Squatter]

I got on the train on Friday and you have all the twats who have been to primark and put their bags over the seats next to them. The train was packed and I walked up and asked some fat bitch to move her bags so I could st down. Should have seen the absolute disgust on her face as she moved them into the overhead baggage space. I asked her if her primark bagshad paid for their seat as they were obviously more important than the rest of the train who were standing up. She had a right fucking face on her the whole journey.