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*Shakes head* Everton again.

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I wish we'd been bought by a dodgy accountant who doesn't pay his taxes.

 

I read that he's based in Monaco and holds his stake in Everton through an Isle of Man company. I guess it's just so he can give as many of his millions directly to Everton.

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Post from Grand Old Team:

 

The RS are cacking themselves here. I've never seen so many of them discussing Everton.

 

We're at that point at the start of the original Star Wars film as the Star Destroyer passes overhead and you already know the film is going to be utterly boss.

 

Episode 4: A New Hope

Episode 5: The Everton strikes back

Episode 6: Return of the Title

 

Nil Skywalker Nisi Ewok.

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Only thing Everton wise I'm bothered about is any of my council tax going towards their supposed stadium like it did Finch Farm. Let them irrationally gloat with no foundation or substance. They deserve some fun after basking in shite for two decades.

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It's also almost like a massive new TV deal just kicked in, and rather than their sudden cash on the hip all being down to a new owner big pimping it, each team in the division benefitted from greater disposable income overnight. Their supposed £100M will be subject to the hyper-inflation of everyone else in the Premiership being similarly flush. The club will know that as well as anyone, however bombastic their fans are being.

 

In my opinion they've looked to Koeman as much for his calm reaction to a big bite being taken out of Southampton's first team the moment he arrived there, and his knowledge of the European game getting them great value for money via a number of astute signings.

 

Outside of transfer clauses, domestic dealings are going to be potentially ruinous from now on, so having a manager able to skilfully work the foreign markets is a must. It's all going to be about who uses their windfall best, and to be fair he's shown he's not just going to piss money away on 'Premiership proven' white elephants.

 

Good move for them, far better manager than Martinez and has a great standing in the game generally, but I'm not sure it's the sign they all think it is. They'll have to earn their position as everyone else will, off the field and on it, and that fig leaf underdog tag they've hid behind for so long has been well and truly ripped away. Time will tell how their players both current and future react to that.

 

All joking and rivalry aside though, them and any other clubs making it a more competitive division can only be more interesting to watch than it has been for far too long.

 

Agree with all of that but I don't really think it's a very ambitious move. Before Southampton, the only team he managed in a big league was Valencia and it ended in tears. He's a good manager but he'll have them up to 6th or 7th but for a team with supposed big bucks it's hardly a statement of intent.

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Agree with all of that but I don't really think it's a very ambitious move. Before Southampton, the only team he managed in a big league was Valencia and it ended in tears. He's a good manager but he'll have them up to 6th or 7th but for a team with supposed big bucks it's hardly a statement of intent.

Agreed. But then the trumpeting of said big bucks is likely disproportionate to the reality.

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How is Everton's new owner and theoretical new investment any more fearsome than Swansea's?

Everton aren't we?!

 

*wipes foam away from mouth

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Fucking hell, Dave Prentice writing in the Echo saying they should now be called the Moshiri Millionaires.

Being called "millionaires" in the Prem is like being called bipeds or food-eaters: it's really nothing different from everyone else.

 

(A bit like fans boasting that they "go the game")

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My mate is one of the more sensible blues I've come across even though he despises us. He's pretty sure that Usminov who has a 30% share in Arsenal is going to sell up due to frustration at Kroenke having 62%. He would ideally like to own all of Arsenal, but as that is unlikely to happen he is going to sell his Arsenal shares and join his mate at Moshiri as owner of Everton. Why he wants to own all of Arsenal but is happy to own 51% of Everton with Moshiri having the other 49% hasn't been explained. I think this is quite a widely held belief among a fair few Evertonians.

Stranger things have happened.

Hugh Grant binned Liz Hurley for a chewie off Divine Brown.

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They can't even do puns properly. At least go for "Episode IV: A Blue Hope" rather than just chucking "Everton" in there.

 

Plus, how are they both the rebels and the Empire, the analogy makes no sense, unless they're saying we'll win the title after they strike back.

 

They're Jar Jar Binks and they know it.

 

 

I like to think the Koeman wage negotiations went like the start of Return of the Jedi, with Koeman threatening to explode a thermal detonator unless Jabba Kenwright paid him more money ("£50,000 a week after tax, no less").

 

However Kenwright definitely won't give up his favourite decoration, the Moyes mural from Taffs Tavern in carbonite.

 

Dissenters will be taken to the pit of Carkoon and thrown into the mouth of the almighty Sarlacc, where they will find a new definition of pain and suffering as they are forced to watch the 1985 Cup Winners' Cup final on a loop for a thousand years.

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I'm starting to fear the blues now.

 

Just read in the Echo that they're going to be able to offer players SIX figure salaries now.

 

How the fuck can we compete with that financial muscle? I mean, it's not like we were paying a similar salary to Joe Cole about 5 years ago.....

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Was just going to post on that. They can now attract the calibre of player needed for CL football apparently. The Echo are dining out on this and Everton as usual are dining out on the publicity and the spin.

Once again, the second biggest football myth on Merseyside after it containing few Liverpool supporters is that the Echo is anti Everton. Get to fuck !

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Not sure if this hard-hitting article has been posted yet

 

 

Everton fans rejoice at prospect of new manager to blame for being rubbish  

 
Everton-fan-small.jpg

Everton fans have described themselves as ‘being over the fucking moon’, as they look forward to being able to blame a new manager for mediocre performances next season.

“I keep pinching myself in case it’s all just some wonderful dream,” sobbed crotchety blues fan Simon Williams, 58, wiping a sniffly nose with his Everton shirt.

“We’ve been letting other teams with more money to spend on better players score too many goals, whilst our less expensive and not as talented players haven’t scored as many. And we all know what that means!

“That manager Roberto Martinez is solely to blame for our utter mediocre-ness, and that absolutely everything that went wrong with our season was entirely his fault.

“Apart from those meanie referee decisions, obviously.

“But at last the rubbish craphead has gone and next year we’ll have a spanking new scapegoat to have a go at. Sorry, I mean manager.

“I haven’t been this happy since heading to Wembley a few weeks ago after clever old Martinez got us closer to winning a real life actual trophy than we had been in years.

“No, wait, hang on a sec. I mean since that useless bastard Martinez got us closer to winning a trophy…

No wait… Shit… Er… Er… Oh fuck it. You know what I mean.”

When asked who he thought should manage Everton next, Mr Williams smiled dreamily.

“Someone brilliant obviously,” he said. “Someone totally out of our league who we’ll never be able to afford unless we sell all the players we have – well, those who don’t get confused about the right direction to kick the ball in.

“Actually, that really wouldn’t be a winning strategy now I think about it.”

“Wow,” Mr Williams said, his eyes lighting up, “Imagine how much misguided blame and abuse we can hurl at the newbie then!

“It’ll be like Christmas every match day!”

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Post from Grand Old Team:

 

The RS are cacking themselves here. I've never seen so many of them discussing Everton.

 

We're at that point at the start of the original Star Wars film as the Star Destroyer passes overhead and you already know the film is going to be utterly boss.

 

Episode 4: A New Hope

Episode 5: The Everton strikes back

Episode 6: Return of the Title

Episode I : The Phantom £165 Transfer Budget

Episode II : Attack of Niasse and Benteke

Episode III : Revenge of the Redsithe

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Was just going to post on that. They can now attract the calibre of player needed for CL football apparently. The Echo are dining out on this and Everton as usual are dining out on the publicity and the spin.

Once again, the second biggest football myth on Merseyside after it containing few Liverpool supporters is that the Echo is anti Everton. Get to fuck !

In fairness to the Echo, it's not everyday the city witnesses these levels of winning without winning. It is far bigger than any not winning that Liverpool FC are doing at the moment.

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I didn't mind Martinez either till he went to Everton. Give it time, you'll see Koeman in a different light once he goes there. It'll not be long before his hair starts falling out and he's overtaken by bitterness.

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