Jump to content
  • Sign up for free and receive a month's subscription

    You are viewing this page as a guest. That means you are either a member who has not logged in, or you have not yet registered with us. Signing up for an account only takes a minute and it means you will no longer see this annoying box! It will also allow you to get involved with our friendly(ish!) community and take part in the discussions on our forums. And because we're feeling generous, if you sign up for a free account we will give you a month's free trial access to our subscriber only content with no obligation to commit. Register an account and then send a private message to @dave u and he'll hook you up with a subscription.

Instant cunt identifiers


Remmie
 Share

Recommended Posts

Walking too fast is a sign that you're a cunt. I used to work in a call centre and there was a hard core of about six youngish scouse fellas who were Vodafone 'team managers' and they all used to pace around in their suits with their designer haircuts like they had somewhere to be because they were dead fucking important. If anyone tried to ask them something they'd answer "HELLO!" but keep on walking while they answered, sometimes walking backwards. I'd have liked to have killed them all. NEXT staff also fit this profile. In general, putting a suit on a dickhead makes them even more of a dickhead.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Guest Pistonbroke

Women who have gorgeous bodies and a face like a fucking bull dog chewing piss off a nettle. Just get fat you bitches so i don't turn around after driving past you nearly causing an accident. You utter, utter cunts!!!

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Russell brand is funny, legging and jeggings are the greatest fashion that's happened to woman in the last 20 years and long may it continue. So what if there's some fat fuckers wearing them i'd take that rather than losing the sheer masses of stunning little birds who wear them. Brown belts, come on, the rest I have no beef with.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

A definite identifier for someone with hair envy is baldness. They see you mocking their lack of hairy potentness, by not only having flowing locks on your head but also a hugely manly beard across your chin, and it riles them so.

 

I pity you Ross.

 

I'd say that the BMW and Audi badges are going to be putting you on at least amber alert for a bad attack of cuntishness.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

People with wanky job titles, who take pride in introducing themselves as something more elaborate that an office lacky.

 

I got a knock at the front door from 'a customer liaison manager', just fuck off.

 

Phone voices, I understand the need to sound happy on the phone, but some of these cunts are near fucking singing.

 

'Hiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii, I am just callinggg toooo see hooooow you are getting ooonnnnnnn with your new phone, Mark, can I call you Marrrrk?'

 

Just fuck off, you are a massive cunt.

 

I also associate the word 'portfolio' with massive cunts. Like those property shows.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

People who drink coffee with a straw, people who drink coffee that is cold, people who drink coffee that has a can of whipped cream on it. People who wear sunglasses indoors, people who wear scarves indoors, people with blacked out windows. Lads who insist on speaking into there mobile, then returning the phone to there ear, then speaking into the phone, thenr returning it to there ear, you'll either totally get that or have no idea wghat I'm talking about it, scallys do it all the time though. People who wave money around at the bar and tell the bar maid that they're waiting to be served.

 

On car's?

 

These are the fucking best thing ever, I now only have to clean the front of the shit pit and the horrid things called children that sit in the back can sit in their own squalor without me being concerned about people see the mess.

 

I know most of this thread is gonna be about blokes but what about the girls. The amount of leggings i've seen are getting to be a bit annoying especially if you don't have a nice arse, what is it with the 20 stone bitches that think they can wear something like that.

 

Leggins, even on heffers are fine, as long as they don't wear the skin tight t-shirt with it. I've seen a fair few go under a short dress like thing and it looks rather pretty.

 

 

 

 

 

Would a female contribution be bitchy? I'd like to nominate neon coloured clothing, on women - orange women. Even passing them in the high street the vibes are I love me, who do you love?

Link to comment
Share on other sites

People with wanky job titles, who take pride in introducing themselves as something more elaborate that an office lacky.

 

I got a knock at the front door from 'a customer liaison manager', just fuck off.

 

Phone voices, I understand the need to sound happy on the phone, but some of these cunts are near fucking singing.

 

'Hiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii, I am just callinggg toooo see hooooow you are getting ooonnnnnnn with your new phone, Mark, can I call you Marrrrk?'

 

Just fuck off, you are a massive cunt.

 

I also associate the word 'portfolio' with massive cunts. Like those property shows.

 

Was dealing with this club a while back who were in dispute with United Utilities, and this bird kept writing letters to them but signing it "Jane Smith, BSC (hons)"

 

What a tit, who puts a degree after their name on a letter?

 

Section_31 PD PHY DPHIL MPHIL MSPAZZ

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Was dealing with this club a while back who were in dispute with United Utilities, and this bird kept writing letters to them but signing it "Jane Smith, BSC (hons)"

 

What a tit, who puts a degree after their name on a letter?

 

Section_31 PD PHY DPHIL MPHIL MSPAZZ

 

Everyone has a degree now, you might as well sign it

 

 

Yours Sincerely,

 

Mark (has two arms and legs)

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Music snobs.

"Ah yes I used to like them but since their last album went mainstream they've been a bit shit"

 

Radio-types-Zane-Lowe-027.jpg

 

Cunt.

That gets on my tits when i hear that

 

p.s

I hate that guy with a passion, get him off Radio 1 along with the other cunts that are on that station.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Was dealing with this club a while back who were in dispute with United Utilities, and this bird kept writing letters to them but signing it "Jane Smith, BSC (hons)"

 

What a tit, who puts a degree after their name on a letter?

 

Section_31 PD PHY DPHIL MPHIL MSPAZZ

 

You've got 2 bags of scrabble letters mixed up there.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Join the conversation

You can post now and register later. If you have an account, sign in now to post with your account.

Guest
Reply to this topic...

×   Pasted as rich text.   Paste as plain text instead

  Only 75 emoji are allowed.

×   Your link has been automatically embedded.   Display as a link instead

×   Your previous content has been restored.   Clear editor

×   You cannot paste images directly. Upload or insert images from URL.

 Share


×
×
  • Create New...