Instant cunt identifiers

[Tony Moanero]

20 minutes ago, Champ said:

Keep up, Tony. It’s a staple in our house; this year being given star billing on Christmas Eve

The 2015 film with Jennifer Saunders as narrator?

[Champ]

29 minutes ago, Tony Moanero said:

The 2015 film with Jennifer Saunders as narrator?

The very one

[Geoff Woade]

1 hour ago, Bjornebye said:

I think it was a tory distraction tactic. "Get an old veteran to do a walk, slap him all over the news for good old blighty and increase national pride for the VE celebrations so we can point the finger and deflect from our own failings."

Thank god someone agrees with me. It’s not the guy himself so much, I think he’s probably being exploited. I’m not digging him out personally at all, if he’s enjoying it then ok.

But it’s things like he’s got his own gin out now, obviously with a share going to charity but the advertising photo for that had him wearing a fleece with a Captain / Major Tom logo. Ironically it was the first time I’ve ever seen him without his medals and they would go just where this logo would, I’m sure it’s not a coincidence It’s therefore likely that these will be for sale, and I can just imagine the type who would snap one up.

All this GQ award winning, appearances on GMB and general fawning over him is completely ridiculous.

He pottered round his garden like old people do and his family who just so happen to be in PR promoted the shit out of it.

My suspicions are that some of the family will also be trustees of the charity and receive generous compensation for their trouble and or appearance fees every time he’s on tv. If I’m wrong I’ll be the first to hold my hands up but it just feels so orchestrated. 
There was a young lad about to be in his first F1 race or something the other week and they made a big deal on the radio that Tom had sent him a good luck note. Again, no disrespect to the guy but why would the lad want that?

[Bjornebye]

18 minutes ago, Geoff Woade said:

There was a young lad about to be in his first F1 race or something the other week and they made a big deal on the radio that Tom had sent him a good luck note. Again, no disrespect to the guy but why would the lad want that?

@Rico1304  you were right mate. He's a fucking nonce.

 

Definitely being exploited and someone somewhere is coining it in off the back of him. 

 

 

[Captain Turdseye]

If this old fella is being exploited isn’t that the opposite to noncing. I mean, how old is too old?

[Bjornebye]

1 minute ago, Captain Turdseye said:

If this old fella is being exploited isn’t that the opposite to noncing. I mean, how old is too old?

I'm on about him noncing the F1 driver. No wonder they've all started driving into walls. 

[Vincent Vega]

Fellas who kiss their muscles deserve to be obliterated on the spot by a drone strike.

[Bjornebye]

5 minutes ago, Vincent Vega said:

Fellas who kiss their muscles deserve to be obliterated on the spot by a drone strike.

Or call them "guns" 

[easytoslip]

Christ I've never seen that, though i don't enter places they might haunt. I have seen them look down and stroke their pectorals?. 

Instant oblivion. 

[Mudface]

 

I'd be getting my own gun out for this cunt.

[easytoslip]

Is Guns a new saying type of thing for knobs? 

Good colour coordination though. 

[Bjornebye]

2 minutes ago, easytoslip said:

Is Guns a new saying type of thing for knobs? 

Good colour coordination though. 

Just dont ask them the way to the beach 

[Mudface]

3 minutes ago, easytoslip said:

Is Guns a new saying type of thing for knobs? 

Good colour coordination though. 

https://en.wiktionary.org/wiki/guns

[easytoslip]

40 minutes ago, Bjornebye said:

Just dont ask them the way to the beach 

I can't see that happening, I only go in Winter, so no one in trunks are on show. 

[Mook]

54 minutes ago, easytoslip said:

Is Guns a new saying type of thing for knobs? 

Good colour coordination though. 

It's about 15 years old at a guess but definitely for knobs.

[easytoslip]

51 minutes ago, Mudface said:

https://en.wiktionary.org/wiki/guns

Sometimes you might wish to produce a Blunderbuss to send them on the way. 

Years ago we worked with lad, he asked us to come along to a body building grand prix, no thanks, later he said we missed a good night, they came on stage greased up in trunks moving to disco music, all the crowd where shouting Beef Beef. 

You used to get quite a few in construction, couldn't wait for warm weather so as to parade, twats, plus most of them couldn't do a day's  graft. 

[easytoslip]

2 minutes ago, Mook said:

It's about 15 years old at a guess but definitely for knobs.

I shan't be using that term. 

[AngryOfTuebrook]

Facebook advertisers obviously think I'm a cunt. 

[Rick Sanchez C-137]

57 minutes ago, AngryofTuebrook said:

Facebook advertisers obviously think I'm a cunt. 

 

"madness" indeed

[Bjornebye]

Angry in a few months

 

 

 

[General Dryness]

8 hours ago, Bjornebye said:

Just dont ask them the way to the beach 

"It's over there."

 

[Harry Squatter]

People who completely change their accent if they move elsewhere. I understand that if you are a bad scally who talks 100 miles an hour no one outside of Liverpool will understand you and you have to slow it down.

 

But to completely change the way you talk just demonstrates that you are a pretentious cunt.

 

A girl I used to work with moved to America 5 years ago. She posted a video on Faceaids the other day and she has the most fake American accent possible. It was absolutely cringeworthy. Loads of people ripped her about it but she says she speaks that way to fit in as no one understands scouse, even though she didnt have a bad scally voice.  So in 5 years she's gone from normal scouse to sounding like an annoying character from Friends. Arnold Schwarzenegger lived in America for almost 50 years and hasn't lost his accent.

 

Another lad I work with is from Glasgow but you would never know as he is quite well spoken with no trace of scottish slang or even a hint of an accent. His mum phoned him at his desk once and he started speaking like Rab C Nesbit. Everyone was looking at him and when he put the phone down he said he didnt want his mum knowing he had an English accent. Must be funny keeping it up when his ma comes to visit him here. 

 

Another pretentious twat unknown moved to London from Crosby. Two years away and he comes back speaking  a hybrid of Cockney, South African and Australian. 

[Dougie Do'ins]

10 minutes ago, Doctor Troy said:

Another pretentious twat unknown moved to London from Crosby. Two years away and he comes back speaking  a hybrid of Cockney, South African and Australian. 

To be fair,  the hybrid mix has got to be better than sounding like a wool so it's sort of understandable. 

[Bjornebye]

14 minutes ago, Doctor Troy said:

People who completely change their accent if they move elsewhere. I understand that if you are a bad scally who talks 100 miles an hour no one outside of Liverpool will understand you and you have to slow it down.

 

But to completely change the way you talk just demonstrates that you are a pretentious cunt.

 

A girl I used to work with moved to America 5 years ago. She posted a video on Faceaids the other day and she has the most fake American accent possible. It was absolutely cringeworthy. Loads of people ripped her about it but she says she speaks that way to fit in as no one understands scouse, even though she didnt have a bad scally voice.  So in 5 years she's gone from normal scouse to sounding like an annoying character from Friends. Arnold Schwarzenegger lived in America for almost 50 years and hasn't lost his accent.

 

Another lad I work with is from Glasgow but you would never know as he is quite well spoken with no trace of scottish slang or even a hint of an accent. His mum phoned him at his desk once and he started speaking like Rab C Nesbit. Everyone was looking at him and when he put the phone down he said he didnt want his mum knowing he had an English accent. Must be funny keeping it up when his ma comes to visit him here. 

 

Another pretentious twat unknown moved to London from Crosby. Two years away and he comes back speaking  a hybrid of Cockney, South African and Australian. 

My mate lives in Sydney now, he came back to visit after a few years over there and fuck me he sounded like Alf Ramsey. He was blatantly putting it on as well because later on after he'd had a few pints he was back talking normally. 

[Harry Squatter]

2 minutes ago, Dougie Do'ins said:

To be fair,  the hybrid mix has got to be better than sounding like a wool so it's sort of understandable. 

Loads of Crosbyites try to sound scouse. 

 

I played for a team in Crosby and we had 4 or 5 young lads. They all sounded scally when we played teams from Burscough, ormskirk and the Wirral but when we played teams from Edge Hill, Speke and Huyton no one would hear a perp out of them.