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Instant cunt identifiers


Remmie
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People who tuck in behind emergency service vehicles in order to get through the traffic ahead of them who are giving way to said emergency service vehicle. 

 

The shithouses won’t do it with police cars, only ambulances and fire engines. 

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4 minutes ago, Anubis said:

People who tuck in behind emergency service vehicles in order to get through the traffic ahead of them who are giving way to said emergency service vehicle. 

 

The shithouses won’t do it with police cars, only ambulances and fire engines. 

Do you follow them round checking ?

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  • 2 weeks later...

Close talkers, with no concept of personal space. Was just making idle chatter with a chap in a shop while we were both waiting around, and he kept leaning in like everything he said was of great importance. "Eeeh, I'll tell you what..."

 

To make matters worse, his coffee breath stank of shit and he was one of those people who tries to tell you their life story, completely unsolicited.

 

I generally try to see the best in people, but it was only 10am, so I honestly came to hate him in a spectacularly short space of time.

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On 17/04/2019 at 13:19, Anubis said:

People who tuck in behind emergency service vehicles in order to get through the traffic ahead of them who are giving way to said emergency service vehicle. 

 

The shithouses won’t do it with police cars, only ambulances and fire engines. 

 

To be fair to John McClane, he was trapped in a deadly game of Simon Says at the time.

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People who talk about their kids nonstop. This lady at work won't stop talking about her 12 year old and his every move every single day to anyone that is in her vicinity. "He got an A on his geometry test a couple weeks ago, I think he's got a real talent for it but I'm also worried that he plays too much Fortnite. Just the other night he was online for 5 hours after school and blah blah blah" Shut the fuck up. 

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1 hour ago, 3 Stacks said:

People who talk about their kids nonstop. This lady at work won't stop talking about her 12 year old and his every move every single day to anyone that is in her vicinity. "He got an A on his geometry test a couple weeks ago, I think he's got a real talent for it but I'm also worried that he plays too much Fortnite. Just the other night he was online for 5 hours after school and blah blah blah" Shut the fuck up. 

Take an interest.  Ask her if she's got any pictures of him... in his swimming trunks.

 

She'll soon stop mentioning him while you're around.

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  • 2 weeks later...

Anyone with multiple Facebook accounts and tries to add you with them all, or says 'this is my new one I've had some bother with the old one'. Usually indicative of the fact they conduct all their personal business on Facebook (usually with their ex) and it pretty much always descends into such a clusterf*ck they have to go off and start again, but also enjoy the drama of having to do so. 

 

Anyone who goes on about Aldi and Lidl as though they've personally discovered it and it's a source of great life-changing bargains. The Middle Classes are quite bad for this I find. 

 

As Tom Ross once said about Susan Boyle: "It's not that she's a good singer, it's that she's not as bad as you expect her to be'. 

 

The same can be said of Aldi and Lidle. They're shit, or middling at best, the entire selling point of them - even from people who like them - is never that 'their whisky/cornflakes etc are amazing', it's always that 'they're not that bad you know, considering'. 

 

People used to get beaten up if it was found their parents shopped at Aldi, and rightly so. Elegant behaviour from a more civilised age. 

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34 minutes ago, Section_31 said:

Anyone with multiple Facebook accounts and tries to add you with them all, or says 'this is my new one I've had some bother with the old one'. Usually indicative of the fact they conduct all their personal business on Facebook (usually with their ex) and it pretty much always descends into such a clusterf*ck they have to go off and start again, but also enjoy the drama of having to do so. 

 

Anyone who goes on about Aldi and Lidl as though they've personally discovered it and it's a source of great life-changing bargains. The Middle Classes are quite bad for this I find. 

 

As Tom Ross once said about Susan Boyle: "It's not that she's a good singer, it's that she's not as bad as you expect her to be'. 

 

The same can be said of Aldi and Lidle. They're shit, or middling at best, the entire selling point of them - even from people who like them - is never that 'their whisky/cornflakes etc are amazing', it's always that 'they're not that bad you know, considering'. 

 

People used to get beaten up if it was found their parents shopped at Aldi, and rightly so. Elegant behaviour from a more civilised age. 

I shop at Lidl and Aldi. Not always to be fair. But defo use both without shame. I like a lot of their stuff and why spend 20 quid extra on a shop when I can put that towards prostitutes and sponsoring Snow Leopards? 

 

I draw the line at Netto. 

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56 minutes ago, Bjornebye said:

I shop at Lidl and Aldi. Not always to be fair. But defo use both without shame. I like a lot of their stuff and why spend 20 quid extra on a shop when I can put that towards prostitutes and sponsoring Snow Leopards? 

 

I draw the line at Netto. 

Do you bore everyone about it at barbecues though, like it's a little book shop you discovered under a bridge in Greenwich?

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59 minutes ago, Bjornebye said:

I shop at Lidl and Aldi. Not always to be fair. But defo use both without shame. I like a lot of their stuff and why spend 20 quid extra on a shop when I can put that towards prostitutes and sponsoring Snow Leopards? 

 

I draw the line at Netto. 

 

Lidl bakery and bread pisses all over the Asda. 

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