John Bishop

[lebron]

I think Bishop came away from that show looking a lot better than Billy Crystal, that's for sure!

 

On his comedic act; I can relate to a few of the topics he's talking about, and I find him pretty funny, if not mind-blowingly so.

[Section_31]

Jesus fuck, 2021 already off to a surreal start.

 

"Deez Daleks aren't dat bad ya know, exterminate? More like extermi-mate!"

 

 

[AngryOfTuebrook]

In 2005, when Christopher Eccleston was the Doctor, it was a big novelty having a Northerner in the Tardis. ("Lots of planets have a North.")

 

Now it's going to be a plazzy Scouser and two Yorkshire lasses. The Doctor's nemesis will never again be called the "Marster". 

 

Fine by me.

[ZonkoVille77]

For a moment there I feared the worst. 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

That he was releasing a new DVD.

[Bobby Hundreds]

Bishop is a millionaire through comedy. COMEDY. Thats like Ronan Keating being a millionaire through singing. There's something terribly wrong with things. A kind of uncanny valley for merit.

[mattyq]

Errr, what?

Is he going to be the new Dr Who?

2021 is madder than 2020

[Section_31]

2 minutes ago, mattyq said:

Errr, what?

Is he going to be the new Dr Who?

2021 is madder than 2020

Assistant I think.

[mattyq]

1 hour ago, Section_31 said:

Assistant I think.

Interesting 

[Alan Sex]

New Doctor will come after this season. 
 

What haven’t they done yet? 
 

Cleary as the Doctor?

[Jarvinja Ilnow]

1 hour ago, Section_31 said:

Assistant I think.

Shame - as the Dr we might have got to hear his real aacent.

[Strontium]

8 minutes ago, Alan Sex said:

New Doctor will come after this season. 
 

What haven’t they done yet? 
 

Cleary as the Doctor?

 

Clary would be even better. 

 

"It's a tight squeeze, but it's much bigger once you're inside"

 

"Is that a sonic screwdriver in your pocket or are you just pleased to see me?"

 

"Watch out where you're putting that plunger"

 

"Cybermen, eh. Is every bit of you metal? Just a minute, I think I have some lubricant for those joints"

[Sugar Ape]

My Mrs got tickets to this comedy club gig at the Philharmonic about five years ago and you didn’t know who was doing the gig until after you bought the tickets. Found out a few weeks before it was Jason Manford and Stewart Francis. I don’t mind either of them so was reasonably happy. 
 

Get there and they say Stewart Francis hd pulled out and sent some cunt on who plays funny ditties on a guitar who was predictably terrible. 
 

Next thing they say Jason Manford has been stuck in traffic and can’t make it but they’ve managed to get a comedy superstar, and we’re all so lucky they’ve been able to get him on such short notice. 
 

Then John Bishop walks out. My will to live just shrivelled up and fell out of my arse. 
 

Actually I’ve just looked and I mentioned it on here at the time. Worth posting again to remind @Captain Turdseye what he is at heart. 

 

 

On 18/05/2014 at 08:19, Captain Turdseye said:

Manford probably thought to himself that Sugar Ape is a twat at the best of times, fuck spending any time near him when he's hammered.

 

 

On 18/05/2014 at 09:04, Sugar Ape said:

He got John Bishop to replace him.

 

Typical unfunny Runcorn mong.

 

You are I mean, not Bishop.

 

[Lee909]

First thing that come to mind on seeing this thread

 

Fuck off, you unfunny fuck

 

That's about it

[johnsusername]

"Did someone say 'Scouse Dr Who'?"

 

[Alan Sex]

1 hour ago, Strontium Dog™ said:

 

Clary would be even better. 

 

"It's a tight squeeze, but it's much bigger once you're inside"

 

"Is that a sonic screwdriver in your pocket or are you just pleased to see me?"

 

"Watch out where you're putting that plunger"

 

"Cybermen, eh. Is every bit of you metal? Just a minute, I think I have some lubricant for those joints"

Love it. You even saw through my clever misleading typo. We will meet again Dr. Whodog. 
 

For I am the Mastur!

[Chip Butty]

For the love of Bobby Ball, what in the world are they thinking.

 

 

[Captain Turdseye]

14 hours ago, Sugar Ape said:

My Mrs got tickets to this comedy club gig at the Philharmonic about five years ago and you didn’t know who was doing the gig until after you bought the tickets. Found out a few weeks before it was Jason Manford and Stewart Francis. I don’t mind either of them so was reasonably happy. 
 

Get there and they say Stewart Francis hd pulled out and sent some cunt on who plays funny ditties on a guitar who was predictably terrible. 
 

Next thing they say Jason Manford has been stuck in traffic and can’t make it but they’ve managed to get a comedy superstar, and we’re all so lucky they’ve been able to get him on such short notice. 
 

Then John Bishop walks out. My will to live just shrivelled up and fell out of my arse. 
 

Actually I’ve just looked and I mentioned it on here at the time. Worth posting again to remind @Captain Turdseye what he is at heart. 

 

 

 

 

[VladimirIlyich]

15 hours ago, Sugar Ape said:

My Mrs got tickets to this comedy club gig at the Philharmonic about five years ago and you didn’t know who was doing the gig until after you bought the tickets. Found out a few weeks before it was Jason Manford and Stewart Francis. I don’t mind either of them so was reasonably happy. 
 

Get there and they say Stewart Francis hd pulled out and sent some cunt on who plays funny ditties on a guitar who was predictably terrible. 
 

 

 

 

 

 

Oooh! I could crush a grape.

[the chimp]

17 hours ago, johnsusername said:

"Did someone say 'Scouse Dr Who'?"

 

The original Scouse Dr Who - from Scotty.

 

 

 

 

[Geoff Woade]

18 hours ago, Lee909 said:

First thing that come to mind on seeing this thread

 

Fuck off, you unfunny fuck

 

That's about it

I took the ex and my parents to see him years ago at the Echo. I didn’t laugh once. He did a bit about wanking on an airplane which was spectacularly unfunny the first time but then kept calling back to it. 
I don’t think he understands diminishing returns.

[Section_31]

20 minutes ago, Geoff Woade said:

I took the ex and my parents to see him years ago at the Echo. I didn’t laugh once. He did a bit about wanking on an airplane which was spectacularly unfunny the first time but then kept calling back to it. 
I don’t think he understands diminishing returns.

His meteoric rise is astounding. He was knocking around for years but was shite, he was on Radio City and it was an absolute cringefest but that's kind of what you expect, next thing he's a billionaire and some kind of national treasure.

[sir roger]

His earliest appearances on Live at the Apollo were decent in low key observational comedy sort of way but like most comedians whose stuff revolves round funny things in their earlier life it isn't surprising that the good stuff is exhausted quickly and the following stuff is humdrum or clearly made up / exaggerated.

 

He seems like a decent guy and a good red so good luck to him.

[Bjornebye]

10 minutes ago, sir roger said:

 

 

He seems like a decent guy and a good red so good luck to him.

This. Good luck to him. Nobody is forced to watch him. I'd rather see him do well than some tory cunt. 

[Section_31]

It's interesting though that for a city with a rep for being funny, which is well-earned judging by some of the shit I've heard out of old fellas in pubs and social clubs that's had me in bulk, we don't produce that many genuinely funny comedians. Bombed our chippies - and so forth.

 

Ken Dodd was a comedy genius, up there with the very best, by and large though it's been poor. The city doesn't and didn't seem to have any kind of comedy scene either, save for the odd open mic night, certainly no real professional comedy clubs like you get in Manchester. 

[manwiththestick]

Probably as when they go on stage there are dozens of funnier hecklers in the audience.

 

It's the same with the music scene, not many great bands from the area, who was the last "great" band? I'd probably say the Bunnymen.