Serious things you shouldn't laugh at

[Champ]

This really isn't funny. I'm in work and one of my colleagues was telling us about an ex colleague who died a couple of weeks ago...when her husband was told of her death he was so shocked he had a heart attack...and died. It was so hideous we all started laughing

[lifetime fan]

Who filmed it off the telly? yeah, obvs!

 

 

I meant laughing.

[lifetime fan]

Whatevra.

 

 

 

 

D's Mum.

[lifetime fan]

Vagina dilators.

[Champ]

Vagina dilators.

 

Bastard!

[lifetime fan]

Bastard!

 

 

Hit a nerve?

 

 

[Champ]

Deflection doesn't work with me

[Jairzinho]

Hit a nerve?

 

 

I think you're putting it in wrong, mate.

[lifetime fan]

I think you're putting it in wrong, mate.

 

 

It's cured my diahhireah.

[Champ]

 

It's cured my diahhireah.

 

But not your spelling....which is shit!

[Stouffer]

Double bump.

[littletedwest]

my dad's in a care home. He is by far the best in there. Sat down one day when an old woman comes over and shouts about me "watch him teeth like a fucking dog" funny because I do have ample sized Nashers.

 

funnier because my dad doesn't and never has sworn.

[AngryOfTuebrook]

Double bump.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=q_K1Vju0r6Q

[littletedwest]

Oh the Mrs has just dropped the dogs bone on her foot and is in agony. That was funny

[General Dryness]

When I was in my teens me and a mate were waiting outside another mate's one Sunday afternoon, when we heard an almighty bang up the road then saw people milling around the area it came from in frantic droves.

 

Walked up and a lass was screeching hysterically about how "she threw it up there, he just went to get it." Turns out "it" was his wallet after a row about him being too pissed, "there" was an electricity substation roof, "she" was called Shelley Fry and he" was her boyfriend in an Everton shirt.

 

Through sheer morbid curiosity a well-worn route was followed to the top of an adjacent car park, and it was nay a pretty sight. A grown man with his whole life ahead of him, in an Everton shirt. In short order the fire brigade turned up to retrieve him, but confirming this wasn't his day on an epic scale, it abruptly started absolutely pissing it down so they had to wait until it stopped before they could touch him.

 

We went back to my car and waited as the emergency services had blocked the road, eventually the lad we were there to see came home, stopped for a chat then moseyed off to do his own rubber necking. After a while he strolled back and breathlessly told us "no need to worry, it's good news." "He's never survived that?". "I doubt it, no, but they've found his wallet."

 

I wonder did he get to do Fry before he did fry?

 

ETA : Fucking hell I was confused for a second there, until I realised Liz was cross thread quoting.

[Dr Nowt]

I wonder did he get to do Fry before he did fry?

 

ETA : Fucking hell I was confused for a second there, until I realised Liz was cross thread quoting.

 

He had definitely done Fry, however, he'd also had his chips on that fateful day.

[General Dryness]

He had definitely done Fry, however, he'd also had his chips on that fateful day.

 

He got battered with a million volts.

[Trumo]

Nil Wallet DC Optimum.

[Dr Nowt]

He got battered with a million volts.

 

Well done.  I also want to congratulate you on that pun.

[General Dryness]

Well done.  I also want to congratulate you on that pun.

 

To takeaway nothing from your own contribution, of course.

[Remmie]

Hove man suffers burn after vodka exploded (From The Argus)

 

Made me chortle.

That's a quality concoction that is Werthers originals melted into vodka. I call it mucky grandad.

 

I tend to melt it using by submersing the bottled mixture into hot water though

[Dr Nowt]

That's a quality concoction that is Werthers originals melted into vodka. I call it mucky grandad.

 

I tend to melt it using by submersing the bottled mixture into hot water though

 

You've just given me an image of The Owl that will be difficult to unsee, Rem.

[AngryOfTuebrook]

Am I just a bad person, or...

 

http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/entertainment-arts-39035720

 

Former Partridge Family singer and actor David Cassidy has said he is suffering from dementia.

 

The 66-year-old star, a teen idol in the 1970s with hits like How Can I Be Sure?, has told People magazine that he will stop touring as a musician to focus on his health.

[Tony Moanero]

John's Not Mad.

[Hand Shandy]

Am I just a bad person, or...

 

http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/entertainment-arts-39035720

 

Former Partridge Family singer and actor David Cassidy has said he is suffering from dementia.

 

The 66-year-old star, a teen idol in the 1970s with hits like How Can I Be Sure?, has told People magazine that he will stop touring as a musician to focus on his health.

You're not a bad person.

 

The journalist who wrote the story is a bad person, especially as they give two other songs he was famous for further down the article.