The English Language - Pet Hates

[manwiththestick]

People who start a sentence with so.

[Harry Squatter]

Used to work with some lad from London who would always say "can I take a Coke" when he was ordering drinks with a meal. I felt like taking an ice pick and stabbing him in the face.

[Harry Squatter]

The phrase 'swear down'

Anybody who uses that is an automatic thick cunt who should lose all rights to voting, property ownership or having children

Using public transport a lot I get to hear tons of scally kids saying this about every minor incident in their life.

[General Dryness]

"So I turned round to him and said ...... and he turned round to me and said"

 

Wankers.

Of the same ilk as "at the end of the day..."

 

People who say that are cunts all day, every day.

[magicrat]

"Smarts",  Anyone saying this isn't

[Remmie]

My bad.

 

Yes, it is bad, very bad. But it's not cute like you think it is, it's fucking cuntable.

[ZonkoVille77]

Mouse, mice

House, houses

 

Mouses is clearly better Craic.

[Trumo]

People from the UK speaking with a high rising terminal, the way the Americans, Canadians and Aussies (and probably Kiwis) do. Non-questions end up sounding like questions, and when they describe something it's like that flute player from American Pie talking about this one time at band camp.

[mattyq]

Using public transport a lot I get to hear tons of scally kids saying this about every minor incident in their life.

It would be a kindness if you beat them for their cuntery

[cloggypop]

Mouse, mice

House, houses

 

Mouses is clearly better Craic.

Meece. Preferably with pesky before it.

[neko]

'Softwares'.

 

No need for the plural - it's software, whether you're talking about one program or a hundred.

[Babb'sBurstNad]

I manage to annoy myself with some things. I hear myself saying "okey dokey" and think "you twat".

[VladimirIlyich]

estuary English is starting to have a negative affect on the Scouse dialect, too many fucking lame arse ejects saying soft souther shady drinking bastard free instead of the more Irish influenced t(h)ree, more and more with the soft "th"s, they need a good kicking in the bollocks, yer don't fink yer think, yer imbecilic, interbred fucking mongaloid.

I've noticed this too. Maybe something to do with age as I've always said 'three' or 'think' sort of minus the h like the soft Irish way but noticed younger people saying 'fink' as in that horrible cockney way.

[Aventus]

Winds me up when people cry arse about the use of the word literally instead of figuratively or virtually.

 

It can be used in more than just the literal sense, it is also used as a means of exaggeration and has been for a couple of hundred years. Literally has even been used as a form of exaggeration by Charles Dickens, F. Scott Fitzgerald and James Joyce.

 

And its in literally every single English dictionary as such:

 

"Used for emphasis while not being literally true."

 

 

So stop moaning, you're trying to make yourself look clever, but you're literally doing the opposite.

[lifetime fan]

Without mentioning a certain sport, but I fucking hate the number of players, managers and commentators who use ‘was’ instead of were.

 

in my opinion we was robbed today.

 

It seemed to start with Londoners/cockneys first but it’s spreading further and further and is absolute earaids.

[sir roger]

See also - ‘ The lad’s done brill ‘

[Remmie]

In an insincere overly cheerful voice: 'appy days.

 

Usually TV presenters.

[AngryOfTuebrook]

All those new words and phrases that people throw into political arguments these days: woke, gaslighting, cuck, snowflake, etc.

[AngryOfTuebrook]

Others on the hit list

 

Narrative - fuck off

 

I use narrative occasionally; sometimes it's the right word, even if it is annoying.

 

Also, I want someone to invent a less ugly word to describe the concept of othering.

[Babb'sBurstNad]

Winds me up when people cry arse about the use of the word literally instead of figuratively or virtually.

 

It can be used in more than just the literal sense, it is also used as a means of exaggeration and has been for a couple of hundred years. Literally has even been used as a form of exaggeration by Charles Dickens, F. Scott Fitzgerald and James Joyce.

 

And its in literally every single English dictionary as such:

 

"Used for emphasis while not being literally true."

 

 

So stop moaning, you're trying to make yourself look clever, but you're literally doing the opposite.

 

The OED was dead to me the day it made that concession.

 

Whenever someone says they "literally died" I secretly wish they had.

[Hades]

All those new words and phrases that people throw into political arguments these days: woke, gaslighting, cuck, snowflake, etc.

 

I used to think so too but they're hugely relevant. For example, feminists are trying to normalise cuckoldry and men are forced to go along with it because of no-fault divorce and family courts that punish men.

[Remmie]

I thought Gaslighting referred to a form of Domestic abuse?

[lifetime fan]

Living my best life.

[TheBitch]

Mouse, mice

House, houses

 

Mouses is clearly better Craic.

 

Mouse, mice

House, hice

[moof]

Hades coming out as a men’s rights activist is one of the more perplexing forum revelations of recent times.