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Ezekiel 25:17

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The TV was on mute just now and she saw a Spitting Image puppet. She thought it was a real person and she was hallucinating.

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20 minutes ago, Strontium Dog™ said:

The TV was on mute just now and she saw a Spitting Image puppet. She thought it was a real person and she was hallucinating.

To be fair to Mrs D , I am on mute myself watching the boxing , and if you are talking about the end of the football I was a bit thrown myself.

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8 hours ago, Evelyn Tentions said:

Isn't that the woman who to and fro'd to park the same side at the opposite pump

No that was a different one. 

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On 09/10/2021 at 09:12, Harry Squatter said:

No, defo not "influencers". Just women with too much spare money and time who will then complain that they have nothing to wear for a night out. 

I suspect they are trying to pretend to be influencers, either to get sent stuff free by Nike or whoever in the future and/or to look like big players on social media. 

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On 09/10/2021 at 22:11, sir roger said:

To be fair to Mrs D , I am on mute myself watching the boxing , and if you are talking about the end of the football I was a bit thrown myself.

 

When my uncle and his mates were younger they were all into acid and other various narcotics, one day they were all sat there and in coordinated fashion put the telly on mute and started mouthing things to each other to make one of them think he'd lost his hearing. Not into drugs myself but that's the kind of craic I'd be looking for.

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49 minutes ago, Section_31 said:

 

When my uncle and his mates were younger they were all into acid and other various narcotics, one day they were all sat there and in coordinated fashion put the telly on mute and started mouthing things to each other to make one of them think he'd lost his hearing. Not into drugs myself but that's the kind of craic I'd be looking for.

Ace , but I was on cocoa.

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Just once I'd like my wife to understand the concept of money in our bank account being finite.

 

Wants something doing this week but we don't have the money for it yet

 

"Does that me I can't get it done then?"

 

Yes, yes it does

 

 

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1 hour ago, Special K said:

Just once I'd like my wife to understand the concept of money in our bank account being finite.

 

Wants something doing this week but we don't have the money for it yet

 

"Does that me I can't get it done then?"

 

Yes, yes it does

 

 

'What are we saving for?' is my favourite.

 

See if the boiler breaks or one of us loses our job or the roof caves in or one of the two cats you insisted on getting needs an operation. Or if we want to retire or ever pay off that fucking mortgage.

 

Those are some of the things we are saving for.

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'Everybody else does it on their credit card' is another one I love.

 

Take a walk down the street, spend five minutes on Facebook, 'everybody' are complete and utter morons. Fuck doing what they're doing.

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4 hours ago, Mook said:

'Everybody else does it on their credit card' is another one I love.

 

Take a walk down the street, spend five minutes on Facebook, 'everybody' are complete and utter morons. Fuck doing what they're doing.

George Carlin nailed it.

 

“Think of how stupid the average person is, and realize half of them are stupider than that.”

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Who pours hot wax down a sink? My wife does.  Then puts the washing machine on a floods the kitchen.  The fucking brand new kitchen. 
 

She can sort it out, I’m having fuck all to do with it.  

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I was discussing the Bob Mortimer book with the Wife. I’m currently reading it, she hasn’t read it.


Stupidly I shared an anecdote from the book with her. She, despite having zero evidence to back it up, claimed what he said happened didn’t occur in the way he described as “nobody would be like that”.

 

I considered arguing with her but what’s the point. I’m not of her world. 

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9 minutes ago, sir roger said:

She is never happier than when she is on the phone while I am never happier to avoid the phone.

When the phone rings in our house whilst we're watching something on tele, despite my protestations, she always answers it just in case its an emergency. Instead of then taking the fucking thing elsewhere she will then sit there with the tele on mute talking shite whilst giving me daggers for having a face like thunder.

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54 minutes ago, Rico1304 said:

Who pours hot wax down a sink? My wife does.  Then puts the washing machine on a floods the kitchen.  The fucking brand new kitchen. 
 

She can sort it out, I’m having fuck all to do with it.  


Why is she using hot wax???

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1 hour ago, Rico1304 said:

Who pours hot wax down a sink? My wife does.  Then puts the washing machine on a floods the kitchen.  The fucking brand new kitchen. 
 

She can sort it out, I’m having fuck all to do with it.  

You say that now in the highest fit of anger but you know you'll have to do it, even if it's just for your own peace of mind!

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3 minutes ago, niallers said:

You say that now in the highest fit of anger but you know you'll have to do it, even if it's just for your own peace of mind!

She’s had a plumber round.  I’m in bed eating a hotdog. 

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4 minutes ago, niallers said:

Maybe the first time in history something like this has worked. Kudos

She usually have me over to be fair.  Although she’s about to go and get me some beers so she knows she’s got a lot of making up to do.  

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