Quantcast
The world of a woman. - Page 558 - GF - General Forum - The Liverpool Way Jump to content
Ezekiel 25:17

The world of a woman.

Recommended Posts

Fella on my team in work has had his annual "I want this done before christmas" orders put in today. 

 

This year his Mrs has suddenly decided that she wants the front room painted, even though he did it 2 years ago. Every year she seems to pull these ideas out of the sky but none of them ever involve her lifting a finger. 

 

This year he hasn't even got the option of fucking off on boxing day to the footy when she invites all her relatives round. 

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
51 minutes ago, Doctor Troy said:

Fella on my team in work has had his annual "I want this done before christmas" orders put in today. 

 

This year his Mrs has suddenly decided that she wants the front room painted, even though he did it 2 years ago. Every year she seems to pull these ideas out of the sky but none of them ever involve her lifting a finger. 

 

This year he hasn't even got the option of fucking off on boxing day to the footy when she invites all her relatives round. 

That's the worst. The 'no escape' syndrome.

  • Upvote 2

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
On 26/11/2020 at 18:02, manwiththestick said:

About six weeks ago I used her house key for our front door and noticed it had bent and looked like it could snap at any point.

 

Me: You might want to get a new key before it breaks.

Her: yeah, will do.

 

A few days later..

 

Me: did you sort you key out?

Her: oh no, not had chance.

 

About two weeks ago..

 

Me: Sorted that key yet?

Her: OMG, it's fine, stop going on!

Me: Fair enough, it will say no more.

 

Working from home today and she's out for a walk with her mum when my phone rings..

 

Her: Can you come let me in?

Me: sure, why?

Her: my key has broken and snapped in the lock.

 

The bit you missed out on was her asking you to sort it out, ages after she knew she needed to get it sorted herself and swore blind she'd get it done, then palmed it off to you on a day when you were really busy and had no chance to do what she suddenly demanded. That's fun.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
44 minutes ago, Paulie Dangerously said:

She's ordered a new 6 seater table and bed from the internet. 

Has she checked to see if it will fit in?

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
5 hours ago, Paulie Dangerously said:

She's ordered a new 6 seater table and bed from the internet. 

Is that like a sofa bed? 

  • Upvote 1

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
On 27/11/2020 at 20:30, Doctor Troy said:

Fella on my team in work has had his annual "I want this done before christmas" orders put in today. 

 

This year his Mrs has suddenly decided that she wants the front room painted, even though he did it 2 years ago. Every year she seems to pull these ideas out of the sky but none of them ever involve her lifting a finger. 

 

This year he hasn't even got the option of fucking off on boxing day to the footy when she invites all her relatives round. 

More fool him.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
9 hours ago, Paulie Dangerously said:

She's ordered a new 6 seater table and bed from the internet. 

She'll be ordering you a match sized snooker table for Christmas "yeah thanks love but where are we gonna put it?" "thats not my problem you're the man you work it out" 

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

A week before Xmas they usually pull at a few bits of paper, then you have to strip the wallpaper and put the new stuff up. Of course now the paint needs doing because it would look shabby.
 

That white gloss and the new paper make the curtains look bad now, the paper she picked just doesn’t go with them. So new curtains are purchased. Don’t forget the cushions, and “do you think we need a new three piece suite?” 

Damn if that coffee table just wrecks the whole look now, a new one needs to be purchased along with a side table for the lamp, oh that lamp needs to go and look at that lovely new shade, we will need a matching one for the main light. While you’re at it the laminate needs to be replaced, she quite likes the most expensive one she saw on some daytime tv show she watched. You might escape the need for a new rug, but don’t hold your breath. 

 

Some of this requires trips back and forth to b&q as well as brain numbing wanders around The Range or some other store that sells home cluttering shit stuff that will be destined for landfill in a year.


You’ll be asked for your opinion, but should you put up any criticism you’ll be told “what do you know anyway” 

 

All this while doing 12 hour shifts and overtime to help to pay for all of this and of course the wonderful festive season of joy.
 

Well that would have been the case if I hadn’t told her to fuck that off and get those ripped pieces glued back on pronto. 

 

  • Like 1
  • Upvote 1

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

We decided to crack on and decorate the bathroom this weekend, something that's been on my list all year. Mrs_b said she'd take the dog out for a couple of hours and run some errands whilst I was painting earlier today. She gets back and shouts up the stairs: "I'm just going to bring the dog up for a quick bath."

 

"No, don't"

 

"Why?"

 

"Because I'm decorating the bathroom you fucking loon, like we agreed and I don't want a muddy wet dog in here whilst there's wet paint"

 

"Well what am I supposed to do?"

 

"Think about it before you let the dog jump in the river?"

  • Upvote 2

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
1 hour ago, Creator Supreme said:

November 29th, Christmas Tree up! Not Fucking happy!

Some neighbours have already started decorating their houses outside. Fuck climbing up on a ladder in the freezing cold only to have to get up a ladder in a few weeks, again in the freezing cold to take it all down again.

 

Fuck Christmas.

  • Like 1
  • Upvote 6

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
2 hours ago, tokyojoe said:

Some neighbours have already started decorating their houses outside. Fuck climbing up on a ladder in the freezing cold only to have to get up a ladder in a few weeks, again in the freezing cold to take it all down again.

 

Fuck Christmas.

Absolutely! It's shite in a normal year, fuck knows what this years turdfest will be like!

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
3 hours ago, tokyojoe said:

Some neighbours have already started decorating their houses outside. Fuck climbing up on a ladder in the freezing cold only to have to get up a ladder in a few weeks, again in the freezing cold to take it all down again.

 

Fuck Christmas.

There's a street by me where everyone in it has put in together for tons of Christmas lights which are all connected to street lights and stretch across the road. It looks like fucking Fremont street in Las Vegas.

 

Fuck that. I can't even be arsed getting the tree out of the loft.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
11 hours ago, Doctor Troy said:

There's a street by me where everyone in it has put in together for tons of Christmas lights which are all connected to street lights and stretch across the road. It looks like fucking Fremont street in Las Vegas.

 

Fuck that. I can't even be arsed getting the tree out of the loft.

Dovecot? Seen a few videos/pics on instagram of a road down there and it looks great to be fair. 

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
47 minutes ago, Bjornebye said:

Dovecot? Seen a few videos/pics on instagram of a road down there and it looks great to be fair. 

Yeah off Western Avenue.

 

Looks boss but I couldn't be arsed myself. 

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Normally I am a bit grinchy towards Xmas but it's been such a fucked-up year that I am not going to get too down on anybody getting their pleasures wherever they can.

  • Upvote 3

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
1 hour ago, sir roger said:

Normally I am a bit grinchy towards Xmas but it's been such a fucked-up year that I am not going to get too down on anybody getting their pleasures wherever they can.

This year has made me hate it even more.

 

Fuck Christmas & fuck all the people who start the shit up weeks in advance.

  • Like 1
  • Upvote 2

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Create an account or sign in to comment

You need to be a member in order to leave a comment

Create an account

Sign up for a new account in our community. It's easy!

Register a new account

Sign in

Already have an account? Sign in here.

Sign In Now

×