The world of a woman.

[Bobby Hundreds]

She's probably just got that money from a birthday card off her gran. I now feel the need to wipe the history off my internet and enter this thread nay more.

[Captain]

The missus has just walked naked out of the bathroom, much to the delight of the decorator who arrived early. Waiting to find out how this will be my fault.

 

Of course it's your fault, you didn't tell her he'd arrived early.

[Captain Turdseye]

She's probably just got that money from a birthday card off her gran. I now feel the need to wipe the history off my internet and enter this thread nay more.

Aye, first the snake shagging and now straight up nonce material. I'm wondering which sites, other than this one, Carvalho Diablo spends time on.

[Carvalho Diablo]

[Dr Nowt]

Wikipedia:

 

A woman is a female human. The term woman is usually reserved for an adult, with the term girl being the usual term for a female child or adolescent.  However, the term woman is also sometimes used to identify a female human, regardless of age, as in phrases such as "women's rights".

[Carvalho Diablo]

[Dr Nowt]

* Makes funny gurgling sound *

[Carvalho Diablo]

Nice bit of crochetting...

 

[Unrighteous]

 

Oh dear blessed lords.

[VladimirIlyich]

http://uniladmag.com/articles/girl-accidentally-bets-mk-dons-beating-man-utd-4-0-wins-1250/

[Trumo]

I can only assume that girl has been posted in this thread because the inner lining of her shorts pockets are showing. It has taken quite a while to notice that, otherwise there is fuck all wrong with her.

[Carvalho Diablo]

[Carvalho Diablo]

[Bjornebye]

Arr eh ive just opened this thread on the train sat next to the bird who gets on at west dulwich. Big image of some slut going down on a corn on the cob.

 

Thats one early bird who wont be going down on my worm.

 

Cheers dickhead, make a thread like titty city for this shit. This ones for girls who think denmark is the capital of suffolk or some shit. Train safe.

 

Wanker!

[Carvalho Diablo]

[NSFT]Women like corn too ![/NSFT]

[lifetime fan]

they don't half text some fucking shit! It'll be the same 2 dozen of the stupid cunts all texting each other the same message thinking what an angel they are and how loved they are by all their super dooper bestest friends.

 

Until they're falling out with everyone and slagging each other off within 2 days.

 

 

"This Is for u. Read till the end it's adorable! I sent an angel to watch over you last night, but it came back and I asked,?why??...The angel said,?angels don't watch over angels!? Twenty angels are in your world. Ten of them are sleeping, nine of them are playing and one is reading this message. God has seen you struggling with some things and god says its over. A blessing is coming your way. If you believe in god send this to 14 friends including me, if I don't get it back I guess I'm not one of them. As soon as you get 5 replies, someone you love will quietly surprise you... Not joking. Pass this message"

[Dr Nowt]

they don't half text some fucking shit! It'll be the same 2 dozen of the stupid cunts all texting each other the same message thinking what an angel they are and how loved they are by all their super dooper bestest friends.

 

Until they're falling out with everyone and slagging each other off within 2 days.

 

 

"This Is for u. Read till the end it's adorable! I sent an angel to watch over you last night, but it came back and I asked,?why??...The angel said,?angels don't watch over angels!? Twenty angels are in your world. Ten of them are sleeping, nine of them are playing and one is reading this message. God has seen you struggling with some things and god says its over. A blessing is coming your way. If you believe in god send this to 14 friends including me, if I don't get it back I guess I'm not one of them. As soon as you get 5 replies, someone you love will quietly surprise you... Not joking. Pass this message"

Jesus. No wonder they always seem so underwhelmed by "Are you up for a fuck, or not?"

[lifetime fan]

Take this angel dust and my cock up your shitter love. You'll be calling out to God then believe me.

[Dr Nowt]

The hunting bears argument on the thread about the child shooting that idiot has reminded me of a fucking brilliant one she came out with on holiday several years back.

 

A newspaper was serialising the story of some guy who either wanted to live near bears or was a wannabe-survivalist or the like, I forget the details, but in any case he'd narrated this story, presumably part of a book he'd written, of how a bear had hunted him and it became a harrowing life-or-death mission to escape.  I remarked on a particularly notable bit to her and it piqued her interest enough that we discussed it for a while.

 

"I can't wait for the next installment now, to find out whether the bear killed him or not." 

 

I just looked at her for a long time without saying anything.

 

"What?  Oh no, what have I said?"

[Dr Nowt]

Also had her convinced, in company, that rosé is just white and red wine mixed together.

 

Far more knowledgeable and clever than me in so many ways, staggering.

[Sugar Ape]

I have, much to her chagrin, a note kept on my iPhone which I add to whenever she comes out without something stupid. A record for posterity which features such gems as:

 

Ken Barlow is looking old. He's no spring kitchen anymore.

 

* Upon watching a black slave be violently beat to death in Django Unchained * Wow. They certainly frowned upon black people in those days.

 

* On an occasion when I'd pissed her off * You're the vein of my life. She then spent 20 minutes arguing with me because ' Bane ' was a word I'd just made up.

 

I told her I was going the match on Saturday. Did you get a ticket off your brother? Or a ticket lout.

 

Trying to imply I'm mental. " You're living in world cuckoo land "

 

For no apparent reason whilst watching The Avengers. " Is this directed by Stephen Hopkins? " when I enquired who he was? " You know, the guy in the wheelchair "

To this day, I've no idea why she thought Stephen Hawkins was a film director.

 

A big loud argument during a family meal that the saying " variety is the spice of life " is actually just " the variety of spice "

 

She's lucky she gives the good sex.

[Dr Nowt]

I have, much to her chagrin, a note kept on my iPhone which I add to whenever she comes out without something stupid. A record for posterity which features such gems as:

 

Ken Barlow is looking old. He's no spring kitchen anymore.

 

* Upon watching a black slave be violently beat to death in Django Unchained * Wow. They certainly frowned upon black people in those days.

 

* On an occasion when I'd pissed her off * You're the vein of my life. She then spent 20 minutes arguing with me because ' Bane ' was a word I'd just made up.

 

I told her I was going the match on Saturday. Did you get a ticket off your brother? Or a ticket lout.

 

Trying to imply I'm mental. " You're living in world cuckoo land "

 

For no apparent reason whilst watching The Avengers. " Is this directed by Stephen Hopkins? " when I enquired who he was? " You know, the guy in the wheelchair "

To this day, I've no idea why she thought Stephen Hawkins was a film director.

 

A big loud argument during a family meal that the saying " variety is the spice of life " is actually just " the variety of spice "

 

She's lucky she gives the good sex.

 

Firstly, tremendous idea and thank you, as my funnel memory has wasted some real pearls from her down the years.

 

Secondly, the bit in bold is painfully funny on many levels.

[Sugar Ape]

Firstly, tremendous idea and thank you, as my funnel memory has wasted some real pearls from her down the years.

 

Secondly, the bit in bold is painfully funny on many levels.

I was laughing so much at the bit in bold that she launched a remote control at my head.

 

Which reminds me of her kicking off another time. I'd drove down the chippy with her and got two meals, she was complaining about how hungry she was on the way down and then kicked up a fuss for some reason on the way back.

 

We got in and she unwrapped her meal and poured it in the bin saying " are you happy now, I'll just go hungry then and won't eat "

 

To which I just went in the living room, sat down and put the footy on, and ate my tea. I could see it dawn in her eyes 5 minutes later that maybe, just maybe, she'd fucked herself up more than me.

[VladimirIlyich]

I have, much to her chagrin, a note kept on my iPhone which I add to whenever she comes out without something stupid. A record for posterity which features such gems as:

 

Ken Barlow is looking old. He's no spring kitchen anymore.

 

* Upon watching a black slave be violently beat to death in Django Unchained * Wow. They certainly frowned upon black people in those days.

 

* On an occasion when I'd pissed her off * You're the vein of my life. She then spent 20 minutes arguing with me because ' Bane ' was a word I'd just made up.

 

I told her I was going the match on Saturday. Did you get a ticket off your brother? Or a ticket lout.

 

Trying to imply I'm mental. " You're living in world cuckoo land "

 

For no apparent reason whilst watching The Avengers. " Is this directed by Stephen Hopkins? " when I enquired who he was? " You know, the guy in the wheelchair "

To this day, I've no idea why she thought Stephen Hawkins was a film director.

 

A big loud argument during a family meal that the saying " variety is the spice of life " is actually just " the variety of spice "

 

She's lucky she gives the good sex.

That Rugby Union team agrees with you.

[Trumo]

A friend came to work with a bit of a temper because he'd had a massive argument with his missus this morning. Needless to say, the reason for it is perfect for this thread. His missus works night shifts at the hospital so usually gets home as he's getting ready for work. She needed him to pick up some shopping yesterday on his way home from work so left a post-it note for him, but didn't mention anything about it. He didn't see it so didn't go shopping. She'd noticed that he'd not been shopping, presumably because they were out of certain items that she'd written on the list. She then proceeded to bawl him out, calling him a lazy fucker, asking why he's being so difficult etc. She'd written the note but put it in her handbag instead of leaving it somewhere like the fridge or kitchen table where he'd see it. Even when it was pointed out where she'd fucked up, it was his stupid fault anyway.