The world of a woman.

[General Dryness]

5 hours ago, belarus said:

Jesus - that’s a bit mumsnet. 
 

If it wasn’t Christmas I’d be begging that. Winky emoji-esque.

Quite. He should know that the accepted terms round here are "her indoors", "the old ball and chain" or "me bitch".

[Rick Sanchez C-137]

58 minutes ago, General Dryness said:

Quite. He should know that the accepted terms round here are "her indoors", "the old ball and chain" or "me bitch".

 

Thon wench

[General Dryness]

4 hours ago, Rick Sanchez C-137 said:

 

Thon wench

Trouble and strife.

[littletedwest]

Apparently one of our neighbours spotted a rat in her garden the other day. So while I'm locked upstairs in my covid cave she told me she's taking a staple gun out when she let's the dog out. If only our dog was a breed specifically bred to kill rats was my response.( as you can guess she is)

[Stouffer]

Mrs Stouffer thought that the gangster film in Home Alone, "Angels with filthy souls" was a real film.

 

She really is a danger.

[Pete]

48 minutes ago, Stouffer said:

Mrs Stouffer thought that the gangster film in Home Alone, "Angels with filthy souls" was a real film.

 

She really is a danger.

She probably means it was a real film made for a real film, right? 

[Rick Sanchez C-137]

54 minutes ago, Stouffer said:

Mrs Stouffer thought that the gangster film in Home Alone, "Angels with filthy souls" was a real film.

 

She really is a danger.

 

I only found out I wasn't about aged 30. Just assumed it was as a kid and never had cause to question it.

[sir roger]

I might have mentioned  at some point over on the dark side that a question on the Chase revealed that the wife genuinely thought that Celtic and Rangers were the same team, ' But everybody always just says Celtic Rangers '

[tokyojoe]

16 minutes ago, sir roger said:

I might have mentioned  at some point over on the dark side that a question on the Chase revealed that the wife genuinely thought that Celtic and Rangers were the same team, ' But everybody always just says Celtic Rangers '

That'd go down well in Glasgow.

[Rick Sanchez C-137]

"Why don't they just solve their rivalry by merging and becoming the Celtic Rangers? That's what I don't understand!"

[VladimirIlyich]

6 minutes ago, tokyojoe said:

That'd go down well in Stig's house.

 

[littletedwest]

37 minutes ago, sir roger said:

I might have mentioned  at some point over on the dark side that a question on the Chase revealed that the wife genuinely thought that Celtic and Rangers were the same team, ' But everybody always just says Celtic Rangers '

I've put this on here before but years ago we were in a pub and Sheffield United were playing arsenal (I think). She asked who was playing then when I responded said "what all 3 of them? Like tag team "

[A Red]

29 minutes ago, Rick Sanchez C-137 said:

"Why don't they just solve their rivalry by merging and becoming the Celtic Rangers? That's what I don't understand!"

I think it should be Rangers Celtic

[Bellflower]

17 hours ago, General Dryness said:

Quite. He should know that the accepted terms round here are "her indoors", "the old ball and chain" or "me bitch".

Bit West Ham that...........

[Rick Sanchez C-137]

56 minutes ago, A Red said:

I think it should be Rangers Celtic

 

Filthy hun cunt

[RJ Fan club]

3 hours ago, Stouffer said:

Mrs Stouffer thought that the gangster film in Home Alone, "Angels with filthy souls" was a real film.

 

She really is a danger.

Lad I know thinks Ray Finkle blew the super bowl for the Dolphins with a wayward kick. 
 

He’s never been corrected 
 

He is sometimes referred to as ‘Laces Out’

[Bjornebye]

Feeling shit today so I've just had a berroca. sat there necking the drink and she goes "are you alright?!" In a panic, I said yeah why "I thought you were necking cider" carry on and I fucking will be 

[VladimirIlyich]

19 hours ago, RJ Fan club said:

Lad I know thinks Ray Finkle blew the super bowl for the Dolphins with a wayward kick. 
 

He’s never been corrected 
 

He is sometimes referred to as ‘Laces Out’

Was that a line from the film?

[niallers]

21 hours ago, Bjornebye said:

Feeling shit today so I've just had a berroca. sat there necking the drink and she goes "are you alright?!" In a panic, I said yeah why "I thought you were necking cider" carry on and I fucking will be 

Ah, the lesser known carry on movie. 

[Special K]

On 23/12/2020 at 00:08, littletedwest said:

Apparently one of our neighbours spotted a rat in her garden the other day. So while I'm locked upstairs in my covid cave she told me she's taking a staple gun out when she let's the dog out. If only our dog was a breed specifically bred to kill rats was my response.( as you can guess she is)

Schnauzer?

[Trumo]

On 23/12/2020 at 00:08, littletedwest said:

Apparently one of our neighbours spotted a rat in her garden the other day.

 

If that was the actual problem, there'd be nothing to fix and UB40 would never have had a hit.

 

Quote

So while I'm locked upstairs in my covid cave she told me she's taking a staple gun out when she let's the dog out. If only our dog was a breed specifically bred to kill rats was my response.( as you can guess she is)

 

Baha Men can shut the fuck up now.

[littletedwest]

She's a patterdale terrier. She's a pet but you can tell she has that instinct in her

[sir roger]

1 hour ago, Special K said:

Schnauzer?

He's married, theres no chance of that

[Remmie]

On 24/12/2020 at 10:45, Special K said:

Schnauzer?

Where's Howie? I've been expecting:

 

Schnauzer? I hardly knew her

[Remmie]

I spent hours making a nicely seasoned Xmas dinner, roast potatoes and Yorkshire puddings were just right. My wife and mother in law proceeded to slather it with ketchup.

 

There needs to be a new section in the grounds for divorce papers for doing that.