The world of a woman.

[tokyojoe]

44 minutes ago, Paulie Dangerously said:

She's ordered a new 6 seater table and bed from the internet. 

Has she checked to see if it will fit in?

[tokyojoe]

Forgot to add. If it doesn't, it will be your fault.

[Paulie Dangerously]

4 hours ago, tokyojoe said:

Has she checked to see if it will fit in?

It's one she's "seen" when she's been looking for furniture.  It should fit. Hopefully.

 

*In a few weeks*

 

Mrs D serving my dinner 

[Elite]

5 hours ago, Paulie Dangerously said:

She's ordered a new 6 seater table and bed from the internet. 

Is that like a sofa bed? 

[Byrnie]

On 27/11/2020 at 20:30, Doctor Troy said:

Fella on my team in work has had his annual "I want this done before christmas" orders put in today. 

 

This year his Mrs has suddenly decided that she wants the front room painted, even though he did it 2 years ago. Every year she seems to pull these ideas out of the sky but none of them ever involve her lifting a finger. 

 

This year he hasn't even got the option of fucking off on boxing day to the footy when she invites all her relatives round. 

More fool him.

[Harry Squatter]

23 minutes ago, Byrnie said:

More fool him.

He moans about her all the time. Shes a proper battleaxe and bigger than him as well.

[Bjornebye]

9 hours ago, Paulie Dangerously said:

She's ordered a new 6 seater table and bed from the internet. 

She'll be ordering you a match sized snooker table for Christmas "yeah thanks love but where are we gonna put it?" "thats not my problem you're the man you work it out" 

[Davelfc]

A week before Xmas they usually pull at a few bits of paper, then you have to strip the wallpaper and put the new stuff up. Of course now the paint needs doing because it would look shabby.
 

That white gloss and the new paper make the curtains look bad now, the paper she picked just doesn’t go with them. So new curtains are purchased. Don’t forget the cushions, and “do you think we need a new three piece suite?” 

Damn if that coffee table just wrecks the whole look now, a new one needs to be purchased along with a side table for the lamp, oh that lamp needs to go and look at that lovely new shade, we will need a matching one for the main light. While you’re at it the laminate needs to be replaced, she quite likes the most expensive one she saw on some daytime tv show she watched. You might escape the need for a new rug, but don’t hold your breath. 

 

Some of this requires trips back and forth to b&q as well as brain numbing wanders around The Range or some other store that sells home cluttering shit stuff that will be destined for landfill in a year.

You’ll be asked for your opinion, but should you put up any criticism you’ll be told “what do you know anyway” 

 

All this while doing 12 hour shifts and overtime to help to pay for all of this and of course the wonderful festive season of joy.
 

Well that would have been the case if I hadn’t told her to fuck that off and get those ripped pieces glued back on pronto. 

 

[Harry Squatter]

[Creator Supreme]

November 29th, Christmas Tree up! Not Fucking happy!

[Karl_b]

We decided to crack on and decorate the bathroom this weekend, something that's been on my list all year. Mrs_b said she'd take the dog out for a couple of hours and run some errands whilst I was painting earlier today. She gets back and shouts up the stairs: "I'm just going to bring the dog up for a quick bath."

 

"No, don't"

 

"Why?"

 

"Because I'm decorating the bathroom you fucking loon, like we agreed and I don't want a muddy wet dog in here whilst there's wet paint"

 

"Well what am I supposed to do?"

 

"Think about it before you let the dog jump in the river?"

[tokyojoe]

1 hour ago, Creator Supreme said:

November 29th, Christmas Tree up! Not Fucking happy!

Some neighbours have already started decorating their houses outside. Fuck climbing up on a ladder in the freezing cold only to have to get up a ladder in a few weeks, again in the freezing cold to take it all down again.

 

Fuck Christmas.

[Creator Supreme]

2 hours ago, tokyojoe said:

Some neighbours have already started decorating their houses outside. Fuck climbing up on a ladder in the freezing cold only to have to get up a ladder in a few weeks, again in the freezing cold to take it all down again.

 

Fuck Christmas.

Absolutely! It's shite in a normal year, fuck knows what this years turdfest will be like!

[Harry Squatter]

3 hours ago, tokyojoe said:

Some neighbours have already started decorating their houses outside. Fuck climbing up on a ladder in the freezing cold only to have to get up a ladder in a few weeks, again in the freezing cold to take it all down again.

 

Fuck Christmas.

There's a street by me where everyone in it has put in together for tons of Christmas lights which are all connected to street lights and stretch across the road. It looks like fucking Fremont street in Las Vegas.

 

Fuck that. I can't even be arsed getting the tree out of the loft.

[tokyojoe]

And I thought we're all supposed to be saving energy to protect the environment.

[Bjornebye]

11 hours ago, Doctor Troy said:

There's a street by me where everyone in it has put in together for tons of Christmas lights which are all connected to street lights and stretch across the road. It looks like fucking Fremont street in Las Vegas.

 

Fuck that. I can't even be arsed getting the tree out of the loft.

Dovecot? Seen a few videos/pics on instagram of a road down there and it looks great to be fair. 

[Harry Squatter]

47 minutes ago, Bjornebye said:

Dovecot? Seen a few videos/pics on instagram of a road down there and it looks great to be fair. 

Yeah off Western Avenue.

 

Looks boss but I couldn't be arsed myself. 

[VladimirIlyich]

Its still November. Fuck Christmas,until an appropriate time,like a week before.

[sir roger]

Normally I am a bit grinchy towards Xmas but it's been such a fucked-up year that I am not going to get too down on anybody getting their pleasures wherever they can.

[Mook]

1 hour ago, sir roger said:

Normally I am a bit grinchy towards Xmas but it's been such a fucked-up year that I am not going to get too down on anybody getting their pleasures wherever they can.

This year has made me hate it even more.

 

Fuck Christmas & fuck all the people who start the shit up weeks in advance.

[Chairman Meow]

I hate Christmas, but not quite as much as I hate the people who tell me I shouldn't hate Christmas. 

[manwiththestick]

The only good thing about Christmas this year is i can get out of visiting people and people ain't turning up at ours and I won't be getting roped into going the pub chocker with all the once a year knobheads.

[Dougie Do'ins]

6 hours ago, Mook said:

This year has made me hate it even more.

 

Fuck Christmas & fuck all the people who start the shit up weeks in advance.

[tokyojoe]

42 minutes ago, manwiththestick said:

The only good thing about Christmas this year is i can get out of visiting people and people ain't turning up at ours and I won't be getting roped into going the pub chocker with all the once a year knobheads.

I've got 'em turning up but bint (and hence cockney wanker) banned. Still take hours to get rid of them though. I'll just bury myself upstairs in Galactic HQ and build a bloody website.

[Creator Supreme]

11 hours ago, VladimirIlyich said:

Its still November. Fuck Christmas,until an appropriate time,like a week before.

Well said!

 

9 hours ago, Mook said:

This year has made me hate it even more.

 

Fuck Christmas & fuck all the people who start the shit up weeks in advance.

Well said!

 

I am definitely getting worse when it comes to this time of year, my mental health is shagged with it all! I'd love to be able to hibernate from December 1st to January 2nd!