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The world of a woman.


Ezekiel 25:17
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I order e-juice (vape wanker alert) from a site that sells it for £1 a bottle. It’s rather imaginatively called onepoundeliquid.com. It’s not the best but it’s cheap and does us just fine. There’s a £3.30 delivery charge so I stock up on about 30 bottles every so often. One of Mrs Turdseye’s mates has been paying £3 for the same size bottles from a local garage so Mrs Turdseye told her about the £1 website and she’s started ordering from there instead. 

 

Just found out that she’s only been ordering one or two bottles at a time. So instead of going to the garage and buying one for £3, she’s been ordering one online and paying £4.30 for it. 

 

The mind boggles. 

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8 minutes ago, Captain Turdseye said:

I order e-juice (vape wanker alert) from a site that sells it for £1 a bottle. It’s rather imaginatively called onepoundeliquid.com. It’s not the best but it’s cheap and does us just fine. There’s a £3.30 delivery charge so I stock up on about 30 bottles every so often. One of Mrs Turdseye’s mates has been paying £3 for the same size bottles from a local garage so Mrs Turdseye told her about the £1 website and she’s started ordering from there instead. 

 

Just found out that she’s only been ordering one or two bottles at a time. So instead of going to the garage and buying one for £3, she’s been ordering one online and paying £4.30 for it. 

 

The mind boggles. 

Is it flavoured with the essence of poppadoms and unicorn period? 

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On 6/20/2017 at 6:57 PM, Captain Turdseye said:

A girl my missus knows from years back has just moved into our road. She's only young but Mrs Turdseye used to be friends with her mum and this girl used to do a bit of babysitting for her if they went out together. Straight away I could tell she was thick as pig shit and not all there in the head.

 

She's been round here with her baby every other day and was already getting on my tits before she turned up today without the kid but with a bottle of wine instead, moaning about her fella. She had two glasses and was slurring like fuck before she left, only to return five minutes later in floods of tears with the kid after having a blazing row and a fight with whichever fucking idiot it is that thought it was a good idea to get her pregnant.

 

Don't need it. At all. We've got enough shit of our own going on without cleaning up after someone else as well. The fella's fucked off so Mrs Turdseye has walked her home and I'll be telling her when she gets back that the airhead is now barred from the house.

 

This bimbo got pregnant again, before accusing her fella of rape and leaving him for good a couple of months ago. I only met the bloke once. We went round there for a BBQ last summer and I sold him a duff car. I saw him at the shop a few weeks ago. He was walking out as I was walking in, put his head down and wouldn’t look at me. I wondered what that was all about. Whatever has gone on between him and his missus is none of my business and I couldn’t give less of a shit to be honest. Like I said in that post 18 months ago, I’ve enough problems of my own without worrying about people I barely know. 

 

I was in the shop for a few minutes and all I could hear outside was him trying and failing to get the car I’d sold him to start. I left the shop and drove away trying to stifle my laughter while he was trying to get the car started. 

 

Well, since being accused and arrested for domestic violence and rape, he’s decided and told the police that the baby his ex is due to have in a couple of weeks isn’t his. It’s mine! It’s a bit of shock seeing as I never had sexual relations with the woman but I’m going to be a dad again!

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3 minutes ago, Captain Turdseye said:

 

This bimbo got pregnant again, before accusing her fella of rape and leaving him for good a couple of months ago. I only met the bloke once. We went round there for a BBQ last summer and I sold him a duff car. I saw him at the shop a few weeks ago. He was walking out as I was walking in, put his head down and wouldn’t look at me. I wondered what that was all about. Whatever has gone on between him and his missus is none of my business and I couldn’t give less of a shit to be honest. Like I said in that post 18 months ago, I’ve enough problems of my own without worrying about people I barely know. 

 

I was in the shop for a few minutes and all I could hear outside was him trying and failing to get the car I’d sold him to start. I left the shop and drove away trying to stifle my laughter while he was trying to get the car started. 

 

Well, since being accused and arrested for domestic violence and rape, he’s decided and told the police that the baby his ex is due to have in a couple of weeks isn’t his. It’s mine! It’s a bit of shock seeing as I never had sexual relations with the woman but I’m going to be a dad again!

No wonder the cunt kept his head down when he saw you. 

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1 hour ago, Captain Turdseye said:

 

This bimbo got pregnant again, before accusing her fella of rape and leaving him for good a couple of months ago. I only met the bloke once. We went round there for a BBQ last summer and I sold him a duff car. I saw him at the shop a few weeks ago. He was walking out as I was walking in, put his head down and wouldn’t look at me. I wondered what that was all about. Whatever has gone on between him and his missus is none of my business and I couldn’t give less of a shit to be honest. Like I said in that post 18 months ago, I’ve enough problems of my own without worrying about people I barely know. 

 

I was in the shop for a few minutes and all I could hear outside was him trying and failing to get the car I’d sold him to start. I left the shop and drove away trying to stifle my laughter while he was trying to get the car started. 

 

Well, since being accused and arrested for domestic violence and rape, he’s decided and told the police that the baby his ex is due to have in a couple of weeks isn’t his. It’s mine! It’s a bit of shock seeing as I never had sexual relations with the woman but I’m going to be a dad again!

You never had sexual relations with that woman? You will change your tune when they find the stain,Bill.

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3 hours ago, Captain Turdseye said:

 

This bimbo got pregnant again, before accusing her fella of rape and leaving him for good a couple of months ago. I only met the bloke once. We went round there for a BBQ last summer and I sold him a duff car. I saw him at the shop a few weeks ago. He was walking out as I was walking in, put his head down and wouldn’t look at me. I wondered what that was all about. Whatever has gone on between him and his missus is none of my business and I couldn’t give less of a shit to be honest. Like I said in that post 18 months ago, I’ve enough problems of my own without worrying about people I barely know. 

 

I was in the shop for a few minutes and all I could hear outside was him trying and failing to get the car I’d sold him to start. I left the shop and drove away trying to stifle my laughter while he was trying to get the car started. 

 

Well, since being accused and arrested for domestic violence and rape, he’s decided and told the police that the baby his ex is due to have in a couple of weeks isn’t his. It’s mine! It’s a bit of shock seeing as I never had sexual relations with the woman but I’m going to be a dad again!

It's not Liverpool Lad we are talking about is it?

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Chatting to a bird I work with...

 

 

Her: For some reason I spent £2.55 on electric today and I’ve not been here. How is that possible? 

 

Me: Have you left laptops or anything on charge all day? 

 

Her: No, it’s been like it for a while. Everything is unplugged apart from the fridge freezer, washing machine and TV. 

 

Me: The fridge freezer will use a bit but shouldn’t cost that much. 

 

Her: Pass. I’ll have to have a look. 

 

Me: Switch off the fridge freezer for 24 hours and see the difference in cost. 

 

Her: Yeah, I’ll do that if I remember. 

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My new GF has a friend at work who is one of those girls that likes “bad Boys”. Her last BF was a big drug dealer currently doing 15yrs who she still visits 2yrs on. Anyway, she’s started seeing this new guy, but they’re not official. Amy (my new Girl) said that this dude walked into their shop with his mates and was acting a dick and playing up to her cause he was with his mates etc. Anyway long story short I was asked my opinion on the bloke over text. I laid into him but also this other girl, explaining that she was part of the problem for allowing him to be a dick and if women didn’t allow these types of dudes to be dicks then they wouldn’t be able to get away with it, also suggested that if she looked at his phone there would be at least another 2 girls that he would be texting. 

 

Apparently she doesnt want to be one of one of those girls that stops him talking to other girls because he’s mentioned it to her before. Also she’s got annoyed about how apparently I don’t know her and willing to give an opinion on the situation without knowing her or him. This is despite being asked by her to offer my opinion. 

Lesson learned

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Also left Amy in bed the other morning as I had work and she had a day off. She asked if I needed any housework doing. I politely asked if she could wash the bed clothes and then hang them up to dry as getting them to dry without a tumble dryer in the evening after work is difficult. 

 

Theres enough room to hang everything up bar one sheet over radiators etc so explained she would need to hang one up over the curtain rail. 

 

Came home to find this

D89E8DD7-5C04-4251-87DF-33659F0F931A.jpeg

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1 hour ago, Fowlers God said:

My new GF has a friend at work who is one of those girls that likes “bad Boys”. Her last BF was a big drug dealer currently doing 15yrs who she still visits 2yrs on. Anyway, she’s started seeing this new guy, but they’re not official. Amy (my new Girl) said that this dude walked into their shop with his mates and was acting a dick and playing up to her cause he was with his mates etc. Anyway long story short I was asked my opinion on the bloke over text. I laid into him but also this other girl, explaining that she was part of the problem for allowing him to be a dick and if women didn’t allow these types of dudes to be dicks then they wouldn’t be able to get away with it, also suggested that if she looked at his phone there would be at least another 2 girls that he would be texting. 

 

Apparently she doesnt want to be one of one of those girls that stops him talking to other girls because he’s mentioned it to her before. Also she’s got annoyed about how apparently I don’t know her and willing to give an opinion on the situation without knowing her or him. This is despite being asked by her to offer my opinion. 

Lesson learned

Of course you are allowed an opinion but the opinion has to paint her friend as a victim and/or in a positive light

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6 hours ago, Doctor Troy said:

Women wonder why men constantly lie to them. Telling them the truth is far too much hassle. 

Women - “Why don’t you talk more. If you were more open about how you feel it makes life easier”

Man then decides to share or discuss some thoughts and feelings and ends up in an argument.

Get it buried lads. Once you say it, it’s said forever.

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