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The world of a woman.


Ezekiel 25:17
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Smug twat

 

 

More an attempt to be helpful really. Why would anyone actually put up with this kind of shit (unless its ridiculously exaggerated/totally made up) when there are decent women out there? 

 

It's not "women, eh?" It's "my woman, eh?"

 

Pussy, pedestal, etc. 

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More an attempt to be helpful really. Why would anyone actually put up with this kind of shit (unless its ridiculously exaggerated/totally made up) when there are decent women out there?

 

It's not "women, eh?" It's "my woman, eh?"

 

Pussy, pedestal, etc.

Yes! Yes! Yes!

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Sometimes I read this thread and think it's proper hilarious, others I just think: "Man, some of you have really crap birds."

 

Just get better birds.

 

 

I love this thread. I come on here every once in a while to help me remember how lucky I am to have married a good, sane, loving, selfless woman. Y'all need to get better birds. 

 

Negged for repetition.

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The thread only displays a skewed reality though. Mrs Rem is a great wife, very considerate, smart and pretty yet even I've written a couple of posts on here about her.

 

When you read post after post of unreasonable behaviour or extreme stupidity, it starts to sound like one person being described and not extreme situations.

 

Having said all that I do frequently say to her thanks for not being like that

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Surely it's a given that most women aren't completely mad most of the time?

Everybody has their moments and I read this thread like a collection of moments

 

Yeah, I mean if you were to believe the football forum you'd think we were all driven mad by Liverpool and needed to get a better club.

 

Oh. Right.

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I think I have posted this before but it is one of my favorites.

When google earth first came out I showed the sat view to my wife and she was amazed. I asked her to go outside and wave and see if I could see her and take a screen shot.

There she is in the front garden waving furiously saying can you see me? Can you see me? While I'm rolling around the floor pissing myself.

(The google plane has been over ours for the last day or two. I spent and hour in the back garden flicking the V's).

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My missus is great, fantastic mother and fights the system to get the best for our daughter. Watching her pull up seasoned NHS professionals and making them squirm is a fucking joy to behold. She works long hours, she's great at her job, she's very well thought of in her profession and her work is referenced all over the world. She pisses all over me in terms of professionalism and dedication.

 

But sometimes she does stupid shit, and says stupid shit.

 

So no, I don't need a better bird. I just like laughing and lamenting some of the stupid shit that she does while still worshipping the ground she walks on. I say things about her that wind me up, but in the cold light of day she's a bit of alright.

 

Huge boobs too.

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My missus is great, fantastic mother and fights the system to get the best for our daughter. Watching her pull up seasoned NHS professionals and making them squirm is a fucking joy to behold. She works long hours, she's great at her job, she's very well thought of in her profession and her work is referenced all over the world. She pisses all over me in terms of professionalism and dedication.

 

But sometimes she does stupid shit, and says stupid shit.

 

So no, I don't need a better bird. I just like laughing and lamenting some of the stupid shit that she does while still worshipping the ground she walks on. I say things about her that wind me up, but in the cold light of day she's a bit of alright.

 

Huge boobs too.

 

She's behind you, isn't she?

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There's some really weird things going on in our house at the minute. Mrs Turdseye has started going on long walks with her friend and the dog every morning in the hope of losing a bit of weight, but strangely she's actually put a couple of pounds on. Also, entire packets of biscuits are disappearing from the cupboard in the middle of the night.

 

Like I said, weird.

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There's some really weird things going on in our house at the minute. Mrs Turdseye has started going on long walks with her friend and the dog every morning in the hope of losing a bit of weight, but strangely she's actually put a couple of pounds on. Also, entire packets of biscuits are disappearing from the cupboard in the middle of the night.

 

Like I said, weird.

Pregnant

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Pregnant

Ha. Nah, it's not that.

 

She's also just told the Labour Party that I've ceased to exist. I went to the toilet and my phone rang with what looked like a cold call number on the screen. Apparently she picked it up and a man said really enthusiastically "Hello! Can I speak to Mr Turdseye please?" and she said "No, sorry, he's dead". The fella went on to apologise and say where he was calling from but she shit herself and didn't bother to tell him that I am in fact alive and was just having a poo.

 

Still, one less direct debit to worry about I suppose.

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