What constitutes the perfect cooked breakfast?

[Pidge]

20 hours ago, Fugitive said:

I don’t think I’m going to be able to sleep tonight. That abortion from Ibrox keeps haunting me. It was truly the worst thing I’ve ever ordered. The bastards should be rated far lower than it was.  I think it was two stars but should have been 0.

Actual cafe or a student flat/skaghead posing as one for some extra cash?

[KMD7]

Is Fuge alive? Those breakfasts he posted were a tough watch.

[Curly]

[Fugitive]

17 minutes ago, KMD7 said:

Is Fuge alive? Those breakfasts he posted were a tough watch.

Breakfast Jesus has a stomach of iron after years of training and preparation. Lesser mortals would have died long ago.

[YorkshireRed]

13 minutes ago, Curly said:

You have unmasked yourself as a supporter of other unmentionable teams with this choice.

 

On today, of all days, this can’t be described as a breakfast of champions. 
 

It’s the kind of breakfast an Arsenal fan would crow about until they realised it was shit compared to a Liverpool special. 

[Fugitive]

‘Ooooh look at me getting my breakfast delivered on a plate straight to my table’

 

Fucking Tories.

[Pidge]

24 minutes ago, Curly said:

The more I look at it the more I see wrong with it. 

[Trumo]

1 hour ago, Curly said:

 

Triangular toast. Crumpet made to look like a fried egg. Hash browns AND tater tots. Mutant sausage. Bacon so small it came off a piglet foetus. Mushrooms that were dug up alongside Tollund Man. Ketchup with mould growing out of it. Garnish. Pride of place to a tin of beans.

 

What's the name of this establishment? I think it needs outing to HMRC as it might be a money laundering operation.

[Bjornebye]

2 hours ago, Bob said:

Best Western Knowsley Suites.

 

The eggs were horrible. Otherwise better than each of the individual parts looked.

 

Not great, but definitely had worse.

 

The ability to slice your own fresh bread for toast gets 2 marks on its own.

 

6/10

 

But... by definition, very likely to be the breakfast of a champion.

Then riots the other year would look like a game of hopscotch if someone served be them beans and that bacon 

 

1 hour ago, Pidge said:

Actual cafe or a student flat/skaghead posing as one for some extra cash?

Ibrox is a skaghead flat 

 

1 hour ago, Curly said:

That’s how I reckon Alan Titchmarsh has his brekkie. I don’t even know what one bit of it is. 

[KMD7]

1 hour ago, Curly said:

 

I see you ordered the full Jimmy Saville.

[Curly]

1 hour ago, Trumo said:

 

Triangular toast. Crumpet made to look like a fried egg. Hash browns AND tater tots. Mutant sausage. Bacon so small it came off a piglet foetus. Mushrooms that were dug up alongside Tollund Man. Ketchup with mould growing out of it. Garnish. Pride of place to a tin of beans.

 

What's the name of this establishment? I think it needs outing to HMRC as it might be a money laundering operation.

The sausage was high quality, but not to my tastes. There was fried bread and toast. The halloumi was turd - my hangover wasn’t up for it at all. The rest was class. I still feel like shit though.

 

I won’t name and fame or shame this place, as it’s a mate of a mate’s place

[Curly]

1 hour ago, Bjornebye said:

Then riots the other year would look like a game of hopscotch if someone served be them beans and that bacon 

 

Ibrox is a skaghead flat 

 

That’s how I reckon Alan Titchmarsh has his brekkie. I don’t even know what one bit of it is. 

Haha - which bit?

[Pidge]

15 minutes ago, Curly said:

The sausage was high quality, but not to my tastes. There was fried bread and toast. The halloumi was turd - my hangover wasn’t up for it at all. The rest was class. I still feel like shit though.

 

I won’t name and fame or shame this place, as it’s a mate of a mate’s place

Halloumi? 

 

Is that the "hash brown"?

[Curly]

3 minutes ago, Pidge said:

Halloumi? 

 

Is that the "hash brown"?

Yeah, it was disappointing and shite

[Bjornebye]

20 minutes ago, Curly said:

Yeah, it was disappointing and shite

This brown thing across what looks to be either part of the bacon or a sausage??? 
 

Is that in Papillon on Hope st by any chance? Because I’m telling you now Henri Charriere himself wouldn’t eat that even at his lowest ebb on Devils Island 
“Hey you bastards! I’m still here and I’m not fucking eating that!” 

 

[Curly]

Haha - I can’t actually be sure, reckon it’s a strangely placed mushroom?

 

Hahaha - no mate it isn’t. It’s not in town. Are you saying it’s no good in there?

 

Ive pulled over on my journey back to West Midlands and got a maccies. 2 half eaten shite meals in a day, and now to decide whether to ride the hangover out and hopefully be back on form tomorrow, or to have the 4 corona I bought for the game later and take the edge off, but drag the hangover into tomorrow potentially. It’s a doozy

[Bob]

Just now, Curly said:

Haha - I can’t actually be sure, reckon it’s a strangely placed mushroom?

 

Hahaha - no mate it isn’t. It’s not in town. Are you saying it’s no good in there?

 

Ive pulled over on my journey back to West Midlands and got a maccies. 2 half eaten shite meals in a day, and now to decide whether to ride the hangover out and hopefully be back on form tomorrow, or to have the 4 corona I bought for the game later and take the edge off, but drag the hangover into tomorrow potentially. It’s a doozy

You already know the answer. You wouldn't have written it down if you hadn't already reached acceptance on a sub-conscious level.

[Curly]

5 minutes ago, Bob said:

You already know the answer. You wouldn't have written it down if you hadn't already reached acceptance on a sub-conscious level.

SAY IT! PLEASE!

[Bjornebye]

9 minutes ago, Curly said:

Haha - I can’t actually be sure, reckon it’s a strangely placed mushroom?

 

Hahaha - no mate it isn’t. It’s not in town. Are you saying it’s no good in there?

 

Ive pulled over on my journey back to West Midlands and got a maccies. 2 half eaten shite meals in a day, and now to decide whether to ride the hangover out and hopefully be back on form tomorrow, or to have the 4 corona I bought for the game later and take the edge off, but drag the hangover into tomorrow potentially. It’s a doozy

Nah not had breakfast in there but the foods nice. Just looks like something I’d imagine them to do for brekkie! 

[Bjornebye]

4 minutes ago, Curly said:

SAY IT! PLEASE!

Nonce 

[Numero Veinticinco]

First time we've had a dog's dick sausage on the page. Bold move. 

[Bob]

8 minutes ago, Curly said:

SAY IT! PLEASE!

Get. Them. Drunk.

[DalyanPete]

On 26/04/2025 at 13:35, Bob said:

Outstanding. Genuinely world class. 

 

Not a fan of Cumberland sausages so would've ideally swapped for plain pork sausage, but otherwise flawless and I'm stuffed.

 

Her veggie breakfast looked banging too. Tried a bit of the sweetcorn fritter and it was lovely.

 

top marks Stig.

 

 

 

 

Your missus look like she's thinking,

So you put photos on a football related site and get called a nonce and other obscenities?

Ok.

[Jairzinho]

4 hours ago, Curly said:

 

"Just a salad, please"

[Bjornebye]

46 minutes ago, Numero Veinticinco said:

First time we've had a dog's dick sausage on the page. Bold move. 

At least it was cooked eh