What constitutes the perfect cooked breakfast?

[Bjornebye]

1 hour ago, Pete said:

So not where Roland Rat lives? 

No need to bring him into it. Morph 

[Lurtz]

I'm in Birmingham this morning, sadly.

 

Chris' Cafe in Digbeth provided me with this, £9.50. Not much to complain about here other than going a bit overboard on the beans. 

 

 

 

[Bjornebye]

Should have just stopped after I’m in. Birmingham 

[Fugitive]

2 hours ago, Lurtz said:

I'm in Birmingham this morning, sadly.

 

Chris' Cafe in Digbeth provided me with this, £9.50. Not much to complain about here other than going a bit overboard on the beans. 

 

 

 

Can you pass a message on to Chris for me?

 

You fucking nonce.

[Bob]

26 minutes ago, Fugitive said:

Can you pass a message on to Chris for me?

 

You fucking nonce.

What's the message?

[El Rojo]

I remember when this thread was wholesome and not just about degenerates showing how they refuel the morning after a banana sex party. 

[Lurtz]

2 hours ago, El Rojo said:

 banana sex party. 

 

Tell me more. PM me if you prefer...

[Elite]

12 hours ago, Lurtz said:

I'm in Birmingham this morning, sadly.

 

Chris' Cafe in Digbeth provided me with this, £9.50. Not much to complain about here other than going a bit overboard on the beans. 

 

 

 

Looks nice enough.

 

But if someone is going to slice my sausage in half, it's going to be me.

[Bob]

8 hours ago, Elite said:

Looks nice enough.

 

But if someone is going to slice my sausage in half, it's going to be me.

Oh that's a great spot. And.it means only.one thing, a pre xooked, reheated sausage.

 

This breakfast looked good and now must be consigned to the bin and their food safety rating given closer inspection. 

 

Your breakkie should be cooked for you. Not cooked for any old fucker then reheated when younask for one.

[Pete]

Is the Black Pudding hidden under all the beans? 

[Trumo]

11 hours ago, Lurtz said:

Tell me more. PM me if you prefer...

@thevhsvaults #BeverlyHillsCop #BeverlyHills #EddieMurphy #AxelFoley #AxelF #80s #80sMovieScenes #80smovieclips #cop #funny #Classicmovies #Moviestok #80sthrowback #funnymovies #funnymoviescenes ♬ original sound - The VHS Vaults

 

 

[DalyanPete]

On 14/09/2024 at 12:29, Lurtz said:

I'm in Birmingham this morning, sadly.

 

Chris' Cafe in Digbeth provided me with this, £9.50. Not much to complain about here other than going a bit overboard on the beans. 

 

 

 

When will be people fight back and demand toast?

[Jairzinho]

Even worse than the fact they've done their "toast" by leaving some bread in a greenhouse for 30 seconds is how they've cut it. 

 

Very worrying scenes.

[Bob]

Any darker than that would be regrettable. That's good looking toast.

[lifetime fan]

17 minutes ago, Bob said:

Any darker than that would be regrettable. That's good looking toast.

Shut up Bob for fucks sake. 

[YorkshireRed]

The cut of the toast says.

 

I’m not here to fuck about like some triangle cunt. I’m here to be dipped in the egg and/or beans and possibly made a sandwich out of. Get me eaten then fuck off and build something, or shag something, or both. 
 

 

[TheHowieLama]

On 14/09/2024 at 05:29, Lurtz said:

I'm in Birmingham this morning, sadly.

 

Chris' Cafe in Digbeth provided me with this, £9.50. Not much to complain about here other than going a bit overboard on the beans. 

 

 

 

 

There are beans and there are beans.

Those are some of the worst breakfast beans I have ever seen - probably warmed in boiling water while in the fuckin can.

The toast - wtf - who cares what shape it is put it back under the light bulb for another hour.

 

3/10 - an extra point for lifting your head off the table long enough to take the picture.

[lifetime fan]

1 hour ago, YorkshireRed said:

The cut of the toast says.

 

I’m not here to fuck about like some triangle cunt. I’m here to be dipped in the egg and/or beans and possibly made a sandwich out of. Get me eaten then fuck off and build something, or shag something, or both. 
 

 

Toast is cut east to west not north to south. 
 

That’s just the basics of not being a nonce cunt. 

[Lurtz]

The weirdest thing about the toast was that they gave me three halves of toast. I've either got a bonus half or been robbed of a half. Not sure which. 

[Barrington Womble]

On 10/09/2024 at 14:07, Remmie said:

Has anyone ever ordered scrambled eggs from a cafe or restaurant and them be any good?

 

It's fucking shit everywhere isn't it. I don't know how it's possible to fuck up so much. I remember a staff canteen years ago, I went in and there was the usual fried, poached and no scrambled. A lad I was with wanted some and asked there server. They replied "it didn't come in today". Puzzled.i said "but you've got loads of eggs". But apparently these places don't use eggs, they use scrambled egg mixture in cartons.

 

1 hour ago, Lurtz said:

The weirdest thing about the toast was that they gave me three halves of toast. I've either got a bonus half or been robbed of a half. Not sure which. 

I'd blame the rat in the kitchen. 

[Pete]

40 minutes ago, Barrington Womble said:

 

It's fucking shit everywhere isn't it. I don't know how it's possible to fuck up so much. I remember a staff canteen years ago, I went in and there was the usual fried, poached and no scrambled. A lad I was with wanted some and asked there server. They replied "it didn't come in today". Puzzled.i said "but you've got loads of eggs". But apparently these places don't use eggs, they use scrambled egg mixture in cartons.

 

I'd blame the rat in the kitchen. 

What are you gonna do?

[AngryOfTuebrook]

Radio 4 foodies having their say.

https://www.bbc.co.uk/sounds/play/m0022s82?partner=uk.co.bbc&origin=share-mobile

 

[AngryOfTuebrook]

On 14/09/2024 at 10:29, Lurtz said:

I'm in Birmingham this morning, sadly.

 

Chris' Cafe in Digbeth provided me with this, £9.50. Not much to complain about here other than going a bit overboard on the beans. 

 

 

 

Just needs black pudding and grilled tomatoes, otherwise that's pretty close to perfect.

[Karl_b]

I have stays in three separate hotels for work in the next month. I keep telling the missus that I'm contractually obliged to sample the cooked breakfasts on behalf of you cunts. Brace yourselves for disappointment, apart from the beans, obviously.

[TheHowieLama]

23 minutes ago, Karl_b said:

I have stays in three separate hotels for work in the next month. I keep telling the missus that I'm contractually obliged to sample the cooked breakfasts on behalf of you cunts. Brace yourself for disappointment, apart from the beans, obviously.

Something I am sure you have told her as well.