What constitutes the perfect cooked breakfast?

[Woo]

Check this shit out, motherfuckers. Joyous breakfast, fresh coffee AND the word magazine. I rule.

 

Oh yeah, that's melted cheese on the hash browns. Booyah!

 

 

That brings both tears of joy, and feelings of great jealousy. Top work, Longo!

[Total Longo]

That brings both tears of joy, and feelings of great jealousy. Top work, Longo!

 

The only thing lacking that day was any mushrooms, but it tasted even better than it looked. It was a good day.

[WaltonRed]

Remmie negged me for having beans on mine the breakfast nazi!

[Total Longo]

Zeke what happened? You coulda bean a contender, you coulda bean somebody.

 

So many hate crimes against perfectly decent law abiding foodstuffs like egg and toast. The war on beans and the causes of beans has never bean more crucial. Fuck beans.

 

"Fuck beans" just made me spit my beans out, in a fit of laughter.

[WaltonRed]

Longo, that needs a fried egg or two and some BEANS and you've nailed it my man.

 

Good work though, you've made me hungry now!

[Woo]

I prefer fried, but scrambled eggs are fine.

 

Beans would just ruin what is a truly wonderful breakfast.

 

On a side note, am I the only one who cuts their toast horizontally, rather than in triangles? I find it easier to make a delicious mini sandwich consisting of a bit of everything in the breakfast.

[WaltonRed]

I prefer fried, but scrambled eggs are fine.

 

Beans would just ruin what is a truly wonderful breakfast.

 

On a side note, am I the only one who cuts their toast horizontally, rather than in triangles? I find it easier to make a delicious mini sandwich consisting of a bit of everything in the breakfast.

 

Beans would be the cherry on the top of the cake but thats by the by you are obviously sick and need mental help.

 

I'll let that pass though and concur on the toast. Its got to be horizontal so you can whack a boss butty on the go!

[Total Longo]

I don't mind beans, but i prefer them away from the breakfast to avoid the bean juice getting everythuing all sloppy. Don't do fried eggs, either poached or scrambled is the norm. Grilled Richmonds and grilled smoked Danish bacon as well.

 

Fuck, i'm hungry now.

[Anny Road]

If you cook the shit out of beans they go all stodgy and congealed thus no juice. Thats how I do mine and they are ace.

[Carradona]

Nice work Longo.

 

Unfortunately I have nothing in terms of food in my flat except for Pasta which I cooked last night and is being saved for dinner tonight. I love being a student.

[WaltonRed]

I don't mind beans, but i prefer them away from the breakfast to avoid the bean juice getting everythuing all sloppy. Don't do fried eggs, either poached or scrambled is the norm. Grilled Richmonds and grilled smoked Danish bacon as well.

 

Fuck, i'm hungry now.

 

If you cook the shit out of beans they go all stodgy and congealed thus no juice. Thats how I do mine and they are ace.

 

Exactly. I open the can a little and pour the excess juice off mine down the sink before I cook em.

 

I like them thick and it removes bean juice from fucking with your other shit.

[Lucky Pierre]

Woo, I'm horizontal too.

[RJ Fan club]

I had a Finnish fry up today or Pyttipanna what the fuck that is . Onions, strips of ham, potatoes and egg.

 

Not a fucking patch on the Full English. Was till pretty tidy with a few bottles of Lapin Kulta.

[mattyq]

Fuck beans, they're over sugared and salty balls of devils's spunk.

My perfect brekkie would be:

 

3 rashers of smoked or dry cured back bacon

2 smashing sausages, 1 breakfast & 1 chorizo

1 fried egg

1 fried bread

Black pudd

Mushies

2 pieces of toast

HP Sauce

Mug of Twinings breakfast tea

[Gilead84]

My missus made me breakfast in bed today, was only a fried egg on a breakfast muffin with a brew, but I got to stay in bed and wait for it to come to me. I can't think of a better start to the day.

[Guest Slim(fast)Shady]

Tesco's cafe for me...

 

 

Worse? any "greasy spoon" whereby the greece is apparent round the edge of the beans...

 

OR McDonalds

 

OR 'spoons...something about NOT having a breaky..............with a pint!

[SammyAftershave]

As long as the eggs are gently poached and lying on freshly browned toast, bring the lot on and pile it up: 4 rashers of thick cut smoked bacon, a generously-girthed Cumberland horseshoe sausage, white pudding, black pudding, liver sausage, ulster fry, mushrooms (for health reasons), tomatoes, beans. The lot covered in freshly ground black pepper with HP brown sauce, extra toast, tea and bread and butter (for mopping up the wounded). A big mug of steaming hot tea with only one sweetex.

No hash browns though. No way in the world spuds (in any guise) belong on a breakfast plate.

Fuckin' low-life yobbo's!

[Fugitive]

Sam & Joe's Cafe on South Hunter Street in town do the best fry ups ever. They are truly spectacular.

[Anny Road]

As long as the eggs are gently poached and lying on freshly browned toast, bring the lot on and pile it up: bacon, a thickly-girthed Cumberland horseshoe sausage, white pudding, black pudding, liver sausage, ulster fry, mushrooms (for health reasons), tomatoes, beans, HP brown sauce, tea and bread and butter (for mopping up the wounded). Big mug of steaming hot tea with only one sweetex. No hash browns though. No way in the world spuds (in any guise) belong on a breakfast plate.

Fuckin' animals!

Little chef used to to little fried potato slices on their Olympic brekkie

they were ace.

 

Potato scones are also tremendous additions to any plate.

 

Edit

 

They haven't quite got the egg to sausage ratio right there at all. 2 eggs = 4 sausages. I personally would get rid of the toms as well.

[hamstrung]

Grilled Richmonds and grilled smoked Danish bacon as well.

 

I usually fry them. About a cupful of oil comes out of each sausage during the cooking process, yet they retain their plumpness.

 

Must be the steroids and earlobes.

[BatChainPuller]

Little chef used to to little fried potato slices on their Olympic brekkie

they were ace.

 

Potato scones are also tremendous additions to any plate.

 

Edit

 

They haven't quite got the egg to sausage ratio right there at all. 2 eggs = 4 sausages. I personally would get rid of the toms as well.

 

A true work of gastronomic art despoiled by a bean atrocity. Like sticking a muzzie on the Mona Lisa.

[BatChainPuller]

I usually fry them. About a cupful of oil comes out of each sausage during the cooking process, yet they retain their plumpness.

 

Must be the steroids and earlobes.

 

Walls have ears.

[Fugitive]

Fuck all this grilling talk right off... fucking split arses.

[Total Longo]

As long as the eggs are gently poached and lying on freshly browned toast, bring the lot on and pile it up: 4 rashers of thick cut smoked bacon, a generously-girthed Cumberland horseshoe sausage, white pudding, black pudding, liver sausage, ulster fry, mushrooms (for health reasons), tomatoes, beans. The lot covered in freshly ground black pepper with HP brown sauce, extra toast, tea and bread and butter (for mopping up the wounded). A big mug of steaming hot tea with only one sweetex.

No hash browns though. No way in the world spuds (in any guise) belong on a breakfast plate.

Fuckin' low-life yobbo's!

 

You poor deluded fool.

[Mel Wood]

Fuck. Beans.

 

If the missus has had them and I'm even doing the washing up, I retch and gag like someone playing a tramp's pink oboe for a bet.

 

The absolute work of Beelzebub Catering co. If I could eliminate them from the planet, I would in a heartbeat.

 

Lucifer's haemorroids.