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What constitutes the perfect cooked breakfast?

Beans with a full English?  

214 members have voted

  1. 1. Beans with a full English?

    • Aye, bean me up, Scotty.
      124
    • Nay, poke your beans up your bum, one at a time.
      70


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2 hours ago, viRdjil said:

Okay, finally told my wife over the weekend, the reason why I always without faii order fry-up if it’s on the menu. So I showed her the thread, my last couple of reviews... complete with all the lovely the comments, and she loved it, thought it was a bit ‘cute’ that I do it for bunch of dudes I’ve (mostly) never met. She lolled so hard at some of the comments. The next day she took it upon herself to cook me a plate of fry-up. Went to the butchers for the sausages and bacon (they had run out of black pudding unfortunately). So here goes:

2 x sausages 

2 x bacon

1 fried egg over hard (how I like it)

Home made beans (with chickpeas and I’m sorry.... some spinach)

Sautéed onions I think for garnish

 

Rightio... Not gonna give it a rating, it was genuinely very nice. Fearing the worst though.

56DCA234-0B36-4875-A349-F4C72337236D.jpeg

The Yolk looks like a yellow Stoma, the rest like something that came through a Stoma.

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15 minutes ago, Total Longo said:

Made a brunch (or "late breakfast" as we call it) for me and my lads yesterday, sausages, bacon, hash browns and for a Gallic twist i threw some French toast in there too (or "eggy bread" as we call it). This negated the need for egg and toast separately, no idea why i've never thought of this before. Nice bit of HP sauce (or "brown" as we call it) thrown in for good measure  Absolutely tremendous scenes. Je suis un rock star. 

How does eggy bread negate the need for eggs? There's no yoke. Madness. 

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2 hours ago, viRdjil said:

Okay, finally told my wife over the weekend, the reason why I always without faii order fry-up if it’s on the menu. So I showed her the thread, my last couple of reviews... complete with all the lovely the comments, and she loved it, thought it was a bit ‘cute’ that I do it for bunch of dudes I’ve (mostly) never met. She lolled so hard at some of the comments. The next day she took it upon herself to cook me a plate of fry-up. Went to the butchers for the sausages and bacon (they had run out of black pudding unfortunately). So here goes:

2 x sausages 

2 x bacon

1 fried egg over hard (how I like it)

Home made beans (with chickpeas and I’m sorry.... some spinach)

Sautéed onions I think for garnish

 

Rightio... Not gonna give it a rating, it was genuinely very nice. Fearing the worst though.

56DCA234-0B36-4875-A349-F4C72337236D.jpeg

Christ, no wonder you eat out so much. Is she after your life insurance? 

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41 minutes ago, Total Longo said:

Because it's eggy. 

 

38 minutes ago, Tony Moanero said:

So are my farts. Doesn’t mean I inhale them instead of having eggs with a cooked breakfast.

And there is the answer. 

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42 minutes ago, Tony Moanero said:

So are my farts. Doesn’t mean I inhale them instead of having eggs with a cooked breakfast.

 

Sounds like you need better quality farts. Have you tried eating beans?

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1 minute ago, Sixtimes Dog said:

 

Sounds like you need better quality farts. Have you tried eating beans?

Yeah, I’ve tried them. It still freaks my nut out to this day.

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3 hours ago, viRdjil said:

Okay, finally told my wife over the weekend, the reason why I always without faii order fry-up if it’s on the menu. So I showed her the thread, my last couple of reviews... complete with all the lovely the comments, and she loved it, thought it was a bit ‘cute’ that I do it for bunch of dudes I’ve (mostly) never met. She lolled so hard at some of the comments. The next day she took it upon herself to cook me a plate of fry-up. Went to the butchers for the sausages and bacon (they had run out of black pudding unfortunately). So here goes:

2 x sausages 

2 x bacon

1 fried egg over hard (how I like it)

Home made beans (with chickpeas and I’m sorry.... some spinach)

Sautéed onions I think for garnish

 

Rightio... Not gonna give it a rating, it was genuinely very nice. Fearing the worst though.

56DCA234-0B36-4875-A349-F4C72337236D.jpeg

I hate her.

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3 hours ago, viRdjil said:

Okay, finally told my wife over the weekend, the reason why I always without faii order fry-up if it’s on the menu. So I showed her the thread, my last couple of reviews... complete with all the lovely the comments, and she loved it, thought it was a bit ‘cute’ that I do it for bunch of dudes I’ve (mostly) never met. She lolled so hard at some of the comments. The next day she took it upon herself to cook me a plate of fry-up. Went to the butchers for the sausages and bacon (they had run out of black pudding unfortunately). So here goes:

2 x sausages 

2 x bacon

1 fried egg over hard (how I like it)

Home made beans (with chickpeas and I’m sorry.... some spinach)

Sautéed onions I think for garnish

 

Rightio... Not gonna give it a rating, it was genuinely very nice. Fearing the worst though.

56DCA234-0B36-4875-A349-F4C72337236D.jpeg

 

3orif6GF8vn62f8RrO.gif

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3 hours ago, viRdjil said:

Okay, finally told my wife over the weekend, the reason why I always without faii order fry-up if it’s on the menu. So I showed her the thread, my last couple of reviews... complete with all the lovely the comments, and she loved it, thought it was a bit ‘cute’ that I do it for bunch of dudes I’ve (mostly) never met. She lolled so hard at some of the comments. The next day she took it upon herself to cook me a plate of fry-up. Went to the butchers for the sausages and bacon (they had run out of black pudding unfortunately). So here goes:

2 x sausages 

2 x bacon

1 fried egg over hard (how I like it)

Home made beans (with chickpeas and I’m sorry.... some spinach)

Sautéed onions I think for garnish

 

Rightio... Not gonna give it a rating, it was genuinely very nice. Fearing the worst though.

56DCA234-0B36-4875-A349-F4C72337236D.jpeg

I feel like you've painted her into a corner with this "fried over hard" blasphemy.  Frankly, it should be grounds for divorce.

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4 hours ago, viRdjil said:

Okay, finally told my wife over the weekend, the reason why I always without faii order fry-up if it’s on the menu. So I showed her the thread, my last couple of reviews... complete with all the lovely the comments, and she loved it, thought it was a bit ‘cute’ that I do it for bunch of dudes I’ve (mostly) never met. She lolled so hard at some of the comments. The next day she took it upon herself to cook me a plate of fry-up. Went to the butchers for the sausages and bacon (they had run out of black pudding unfortunately). So here goes:

2 x sausages 

2 x bacon

1 fried egg over hard (how I like it)

Home made beans (with chickpeas and I’m sorry.... some spinach)

Sautéed onions I think for garnish

 

Rightio... Not gonna give it a rating, it was genuinely very nice. Fearing the worst though.

56DCA234-0B36-4875-A349-F4C72337236D.jpeg

She clearly doesn't care about your positive rep score. 

 

Is she related to Damien Hirst? She has managed to make a fry-up look like Luke Chadwick. 

 

Where are you going to hide the body? 

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I've repped it because people should always be encouraged in the noble art of the Fry Up.

The egg, though, Jesus Fucking Titty Christ

I'm traumatised 

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11 minutes ago, viRdjil said:

Probably won’t share the comments with her now.

You mean she is still alive? She tried to kill you mate 

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1 hour ago, viRdjil said:

Probably won’t share the comments with her now.

Show her this, mate.

 

9CC818D7-8A84-44A7-ABE6-470D487C041E.jpeg

 

Fantastic brekkie. Sausages and bacon look delicious. The egg is perfect - just how I like them. Homemade beans are to die for. Is your wife on Deliveroo?

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8 hours ago, viRdjil said:

Okay, finally told my wife over the weekend, the reason why I always without faii order fry-up if it’s on the menu. So I showed her the thread, my last couple of reviews... complete with all the lovely the comments, and she loved it, thought it was a bit ‘cute’ that I do it for bunch of dudes I’ve (mostly) never met. She lolled so hard at some of the comments. The next day she took it upon herself to cook me a plate of fry-up. Went to the butchers for the sausages and bacon (they had run out of black pudding unfortunately). So here goes:

2 x sausages 

2 x bacon

1 fried egg over hard (how I like it)

Home made beans (with chickpeas and I’m sorry.... some spinach)

Sautéed onions I think for garnish

 

Rightio... Not gonna give it a rating, it was genuinely very nice. Fearing the worst though.

56DCA234-0B36-4875-A349-F4C72337236D.jpeg

Eating mess?

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20 minutes ago, Tony Moanero said:

Show her this, mate.

 

 

Fantastic brekkie. Sausages and bacon look delicious. The egg is perfect - just how I like them. Homemade beans are to die for. Is your wife on Deliveroo?

Vanessa George over here 

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