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What constitutes the perfect cooked breakfast?

Beans with a full English?  

173 members have voted

  1. 1. Beans with a full English?

    • Aye, bean me up, Scotty.
      124
    • Nay, poke your beans up your bum, one at a time.
      54


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10 hours ago, Fugitive said:

Fucking hell. It’s a fucking disaster from top to bottom.

 

One cheap anorexic link sausage that they sliced in half to make it look as if I got two.

Fatty undercooked shit bacon from a pig with aids.

Limp mushrooms.

overcooked eggs.

Cheap Black Pudding.

Shit looking Haggis.

 

That was bad enough but the lot of it was floating on a sea on fucking beans that looked like they had fallen out of somebody’s arse.

 

-75/10

 

straight in the bin.

30303553-63A2-4243-88A2-97CD40F92268.jpeg

What’s the chunk between the sausages and the black pudding? I have to say it doesn’t look great, but I bet it would look twice as good if you actually ate it as opposed to had it delivered. The sausage looks of very poor quality. Almost quorn sausage like .

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1 hour ago, Fugitive said:

It looks like it looks like Jade Goody’s minge... post-mortem!!!

Jesus wept 

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6 minutes ago, Bjornebye said:

Jesus wept 

And so did her snatch... for months and months and months.

 

A-fucking-men.

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3 hours ago, Fugitive said:

And so did her snatch... for months and months and months.

 

A-fucking-men.

I remember my first pint 

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9 hours ago, aRdja said:

What’s the chunk between the sausages and the black pudding? I have to say it doesn’t look great, but I bet it would look twice as good if you actually ate it as opposed to had it delivered. The sausage looks of very poor quality. Almost quorn sausage like .

It's a square/lorne sausage & it belongs in a roll, I wouldn't have one on a fry up.

 

Weegie bastards.

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9 hours ago, aRdja said:

What’s the chunk between the sausages and the black pudding? I have to say it doesn’t look great, but I bet it would look twice as good if you actually ate it as opposed to had it delivered. The sausage looks of very poor quality. Almost quorn sausage like .

*ate in

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6 minutes ago, Mook said:

It's a square/lorne sausage & it belongs in a roll, I wouldn't have one on a fry up.

 

Weegie bastards.

 

Oooooo... new thing to try....

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On 10/12/2018 at 11:08 AM, Numero Veinticinco said:

Ooh, yeah, that sounds like it could have uncooked bacon fat and warm bread written all over it. I look forward to seeing how fucked it is.

You went full Lifey there. Never go full Lifey.

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Fair fucks to Fuge for putting himself through the trauma of that. It's been playing on my mind all day. 

 

The worst breakfast on here in living memory.

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19 minutes ago, TheBitch said:

Fair fucks to Fuge for putting himself through the trauma of that. It's been playing on my mind all day. 

 

The worst breakfast on here in living memory.

The most worrying thing about this is it actually isn't the worst. 

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3 minutes ago, Bjornebye said:

The most worrying thing about this is it actually isn't the worst. 

I honestly must have missed it, because there's literally nothing in that polystyrene box that I would eat.

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That breakfast deserves to be complimented by some of that weak-arsed buttered toast BannedBlogBloke dared to post.

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14 minutes ago, TheBitch said:

I honestly must have missed it, because there's literally nothing in that polystyrene box that I would eat.

Did you not see Lifeys? 

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53 minutes ago, Bjornebye said:

Did you not see Lifeys? 

I reckon that even in that burnt up mess, there must have been something I could have stomached.

There's literally nothing in Fuge's that I would eat.

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13 minutes ago, TheBitch said:

I reckon that even in that burnt up mess, there must have been something I could have stomached.

There's literally nothing in Fuge's that I would eat.

Yeah, when the polystyrene box is the most edible part of the breakfast, you know shit has gone south. 

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It saved him the trouble of whisking up a bowl of piss and shit and slipping it into a carrier bag. Makes perfect sense when you think about it. I was disappointed in the lack of conker though.

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I’m still trying to come to terms with everything. Today has been a big struggle and I considered throwing myself in front of a train at one point. I don’t know if I’ll ever be the same again and I’m fearful of what the future holds.

 

I think I may need to see a PTSD counselor.

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