Jump to content
  • Sign up for free and receive a month's subscription

    You are viewing this page as a guest. That means you are either a member who has not logged in, or you have not yet registered with us. Signing up for an account only takes a minute and it means you will no longer see this annoying box! It will also allow you to get involved with our friendly(ish!) community and take part in the discussions on our forums. And because we're feeling generous, if you sign up for a free account we will give you a month's free trial access to our subscriber only content with no obligation to commit. Register an account and then send a private message to @dave u and he'll hook you up with a subscription.

What constitutes the perfect cooked breakfast?


ISeeRed
 Share

Beans with a full English?  

229 members have voted

  1. 1. Beans with a full English?

    • Aye, bean me up, Scotty.
      124
    • Nay, poke your beans up your bum, one at a time.
      73


Recommended Posts

14 hours ago, Colonel Kurtz said:

I think in mitigation it should be said I cooked this whilst very hungover and just wanted to eat fried stuff then lie down. Fuck knows what inspired me to put a picture up. Next weeks effort will be better.

You could put a picture of a pot noodle up next week and it would be a better cooked breakfast than what you’ve put there yesterday. 
 

Im not even angry with you, just disappointed.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

13 hours ago, The Gaul said:

I was away in Cornwall this week. I had just the one fry up in a beach cafe while the kids were doing a paddle boarding lesson. It's got to be said I was massively disappointed, but did discover some weird pork thing I'm told is called "hogs pudding", which is alright and I bought some to bring home. The only other positive I can say is it was half price due to this new government thing, so 6.20 for this and a coffee, I'd have been absolutely fuming had I paid over 12 quid for this. 

 

The only thing I think they actually cooked fresh are the weird potato things and toast, with the rest is pre-cooked and microwaved, including the egg. 2/10

IMG_20200803_111912.jpg

IMG_20200803_114016.jpg

IMG_20200806_092515.jpg

That looks like a supermarket cafe breakfast. Shite.

 

Some terrible entries on here this weekend - I’ve got to say, if I wasn’t so proficient at it, I’d find it very difficult to masturbate to this thread.

  • Upvote 2
Link to comment
Share on other sites

I’m starving. Haven’t eaten since breakfast yesterday and, even then, I only had two slices of toast.
 

Despite my raging hunger, I still wouldn’t touch Kurtz abomination. In fact, looking at the photo again has suppressed my appetite slightly. 
 

Perhaps it could yet provide a positive service to the forum by being posted on every page of the ‘Sick of being fat’ thread.
 

Fancy a cream bun, tempted by a lemon drizzle! Simply drop into the SOBF thread, have a quick gander at the photo, leave with temptation abated and current waistline not increased. 

  • Upvote 2
Link to comment
Share on other sites

7 minutes ago, YorkshireRed said:

I’m starving. Haven’t eaten since breakfast yesterday and, even then, I only had two slices of toast.
 

Despite my raging hunger, I still wouldn’t touch Kurtz abomination. In fact, looking at the photo again has suppressed my appetite slightly. 
 

Perhaps it could yet provide a positive service to the forum by being posted on every page of the ‘Sick of being fat’ thread.
 

Fancy a cream bun, tempted by a lemon drizzle! Simply drop into the SOBF thread, have a quick gander at the photo, leave with temptation abated and current waistline not increased. 

Nothing since brekkie yesterday? You been at the beak on your bevvy sesh? I used to love a comedown dirty food day. In fact I’m going to have one today, just without the comedown. Cooked breakfast, pot noodle at some point, fizzy drinks, a couple of choux buns and a Chinese later. Yes.

  • Upvote 1
Link to comment
Share on other sites

Just now, belarus said:

Nothing since brekkie yesterday? You been at the beak on your bevvy sesh? I used to love a comedown dirty food day. In fact I’m going to have one today, just without the comedown. Cooked breakfast, pot noodle at some point, fizzy drinks, a couple of choux buns and a Chinese later. Yes.

Enjoy. 
 

Trying to cut down on the beak but still had a couple of small lines yesterday. It’s amazing how it reduces your appetite but leaves you starving as the comedown hits.
 

It would be a perfect diet supplement if I just did it all day everyday. In part because of its appetite suppressing qualities, but mainly because I’d have no money to buy food. 

  • Upvote 2
Link to comment
Share on other sites

11 hours ago, Colonel Kurtz said:

Whatever you have for breakfast in the morning, post the fucker. 

I feel a bit sorry for you Kurtz, so after your gauntlet throwing I will post the rather sorry and meager effort I was able to conjure up due to lack of stuff in (nearly posted a bowl of cereal). I didn't even find a conker and keys to add to it for fucks sake. Maybe this will deflect attention away, comrade

 

 

IMG_20200809_095432.jpg

  • Upvote 4
Link to comment
Share on other sites

11 minutes ago, belarus said:

Right, another Sunday another cooked breakfast. Hotel over Telford way. Not as tasty as my last posting, but a solid effort. Could have been a bit bigger. 7/10.

 

 

3222D9C6-3064-4C44-9350-74389ABC1127.jpeg

No toast? Had they even thawed out that hash brown? Good that a snooker cue was supplied for a quick frame afterwards. 

 

Is that the Manx symbol in the tomato? Nice touch. Good to see the egg try a new career as a Frisbee. The portion size of the beans shows they know that it had no right to be on there so served it in a ketchup/sauce pot. 

 

Nice Minsks, Belarus, nice Minsks

  • Upvote 1
Link to comment
Share on other sites

2 minutes ago, Remmie said:

No toast? Had they even thawed out that hash brown? 

The hash brown was shite. Big factor towards the 3 lost marks. 
 

The toast came BEFORE the breakfast. As like a sort of starter. I didn’t mind though as I was starving.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

13 minutes ago, belarus said:

Right, another Sunday another cooked breakfast. Hotel over Telford way. Not as tasty as my last posting, but a solid effort. Could have been a bit bigger. 7/10.

 

 

3222D9C6-3064-4C44-9350-74389ABC1127.jpeg

My eyes are drawn to the dumplings

Link to comment
Share on other sites

10 minutes ago, belarus said:

Hahahaha 

 

In retrospect I should have checked the picture before posting. She’s not arsed though now I’ve shown her. Fair play to her.

Well she did greatly improve matters, she could make kurtz's offering almost palatable.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

27 minutes ago, belarus said:

Right, another Sunday another cooked breakfast. Hotel over Telford way. Not as tasty as my last posting, but a solid effort. Could have been a bit bigger. 7/10.

 

 

3222D9C6-3064-4C44-9350-74389ABC1127.jpeg

Looks nice that, needs an extra sausage and piece of bacon though.

 

And toast.

 

And more beans.

 

  • Downvote 1
Link to comment
Share on other sites

16 hours ago, The Gaul said:

I was away in Cornwall this week. I had just the one fry up in a beach cafe while the kids were doing a paddle boarding lesson. It's got to be said I was massively disappointed, but did discover some weird pork thing I'm told is called "hogs pudding", which is alright and I bought some to bring home. The only other positive I can say is it was half price due to this new government thing, so 6.20 for this and a coffee, I'd have been absolutely fuming had I paid over 12 quid for this. 

 

The only thing I think they actually cooked fresh are the weird potato things and toast, with the rest is pre-cooked and microwaved, including the egg. 2/10

IMG_20200803_111912.jpg

IMG_20200803_114016.jpg

IMG_20200806_092515.jpg

Where exactly is this? I shall go round and have a word with the robbing bastards.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

28 minutes ago, belarus said:

Right, another Sunday another cooked breakfast. Hotel over Telford way. Not as tasty as my last posting, but a solid effort. Could have been a bit bigger. 7/10.

 

 

3222D9C6-3064-4C44-9350-74389ABC1127.jpeg

It’s a decent effort. However I suspect your ‘accidental’ inclusion of your wife’s cleavage is a deliberate attempt to deflect attention from the few minor flaws this breakfast clearly has:

 

1. I’ll leave the shape of the plate to others but it’s quite simply disgraceful.

 

2. The hash brown looks a little underdone. Probably a personal preference, but I like to see them a little crispier than this one.

 

3. One sausage. I can only assume you ate the other six before remembering to take the photo.

 

4. Ditto the bacon.

 

5. If I was asked to make do with a thimble full of beans, I’d probably cry. All week you’ve waited to dunk something breakfast like into the glorious bean juices and this is what you get. I hope your wife is helping you through the trauma. 

  • Upvote 2
  • Downvote 1
Link to comment
Share on other sites

Join the conversation

You can post now and register later. If you have an account, sign in now to post with your account.

Guest
Reply to this topic...

×   Pasted as rich text.   Paste as plain text instead

  Only 75 emoji are allowed.

×   Your link has been automatically embedded.   Display as a link instead

×   Your previous content has been restored.   Clear editor

×   You cannot paste images directly. Upload or insert images from URL.

 Share


×
×
  • Create New...