What constitutes the perfect cooked breakfast?

[Nunavut Patrick]

3 hours ago, Colonel Kurtz said:

Here is today’s hangover effort. Do you worst. 

I’ve borne witness to sausages that are  an abomination but that sausage is the most abominable of all.

 

And rashers shouldn’t be grey. 
 

And the eggs appear to have shed their uterine lining. Onto the sausage.

 

Also, did not know they made a brown pudding. 
 

Demoted  two ranks. Three if you actuality ate it 

[Trumo]

3 hours ago, Colonel Kurtz said:

Here is today’s hangover effort. Do you worst. 

 

[pic of Kurtz's abomination removed]

 

You know that scene in Minority Report where Tom Cruise's character reaches for the wrong sandwich after his eye transplant...?

[Stouffer]

4 hours ago, Colonel Kurtz said:

Here is today’s hangover effort. Do you worst. 

You durrrty fucker.

[Atticus Finch]

4 hours ago, Colonel Kurtz said:

Here is today’s hangover effort. Do you worst. 

Pesti’s effort which to be fair was a decent effort considering it’s overseas and it gets a neg, this abomination of which there is no excuse for, and it gets an upvote. 
Standards have clearly slipped on this thread.

 

I blame Ardja for posting all them shit breakfasts people have become immune 

[Stouffer]

3 hours ago, Tony Moanero said:

Did you cook that on an A La Cart Kitchen?

 

"Wake up daddy, breakfast ready"

 

That advert still haunts me to this day.

[TheHowieLama]

Was @Colonel Kurtz the fella who was cooking sausages in a pan on a bbq cuz he didn't realize you were supposed to lay them across the grate?

[Mudface]

5 minutes ago, Colonel Kurtz said:

I think in mitigation it should be said I cooked this whilst very hungover and just wanted to eat fried stuff then lie down. Fuck knows what inspired me to put a picture up. Next weeks effort will be better.

I'm sure it will, given you'll be in prison.

[Barrington Womble]

I was away in Cornwall this week. I had just the one fry up in a beach cafe while the kids were doing a paddle boarding lesson. It's got to be said I was massively disappointed, but did discover some weird pork thing I'm told is called "hogs pudding", which is alright and I bought some to bring home. The only other positive I can say is it was half price due to this new government thing, so 6.20 for this and a coffee, I'd have been absolutely fuming had I paid over 12 quid for this. 

 

The only thing I think they actually cooked fresh are the weird potato things and toast, with the rest is pre-cooked and microwaved, including the egg. 2/10

[Bjornebye]

Put some NSFW tags around that you disgusting twat 

[mgw100]

£12 would be criminal

[Mudface]

It was good of them to pre-chew the scrambled eggs for you.

[cloggypop]

Is it served on a saucer? 

[Anubis]

£12?! Fuck off, A Red, and take your thieving Cornish coterie with you.

[Nunavut Patrick]

Breakfast Pirates of Penzance 

[Remmie]

4 hours ago, Atticus Finch said:

Pesti’s effort which to be fair was a decent effort considering it’s overseas and it gets a neg, this abomination of which there is no excuse for, and it gets an upvote. 
Standards have clearly slipped on this thread.

 

I blame Ardja for posting all them shit breakfasts people have become immune 

I repped Kurtz' effort because its thread etiquette to rep any picture of a breakfast you have consumed, before systematically ripping it to shreds until that person has such traumas that they turn to self harm or supporting E*erton. 

 

Even bean pushing dribble chins get a rep from me if they post their breakfast. Sick deviants that they are. 

[KMD7]

9 hours ago, Colonel Kurtz said:

Here is today’s hangover effort. Do you worst. 

That will probably look alright when its cooked.

[Remmie]

1 minute ago, Colonel Kurtz said:

Post your own fucking breakfast tomorrow. Be a man, balls it out, bathe in the fire of other poster’s opprobrium. It makes you feel alive ! 

I've posted a few breakfasts on this thread including one I made myself

[Bruce Spanner]

15 minutes ago, Colonel Kurtz said:

Post your own fucking breakfast tomorrow. Be a man, balls it out, bathe in the fire of other poster’s opprobrium. It makes you feel alive ! 

You come at the king (of the GF) you best not fucking miss.

 

You missed.

[Numero Veinticinco]

29 minutes ago, Colonel Kurtz said:

Post your own fucking breakfast tomorrow. Be a man, balls it out, bathe in the fire of other poster’s opprobrium. It makes you feel alive ! 

Erm, Remmie has more balls than any other man alive when it comes to posting his creations. I can say that his pizza is better than your breakfast and his pizza is often mistaken for cytoplasm. 

[Tony Moanero]

21 minutes ago, Colonel Kurtz said:

I told him to post a picture of his own breakfast tomorrow. It’s not exactly the grassy knoll is it ? 

Have some respect, you bastard. Remmie eats poached eggs on toast whilst A.C. Slatering.

[Guest]

58 minutes ago, Remmie said:

I've posted a few breakfasts on this thread including one I made myself

There are some things better off left in the past.

[Bruce Spanner]

24 minutes ago, Colonel Kurtz said:

I told him to post a picture of his own breakfast tomorrow. It’s not exactly the grassy knoll is it ? 

It is, and you’ve died on it.

 

Almost as bad as talking smack about Dave’s hair, cunt.

[Guest]

25 minutes ago, Colonel Kurtz said:

I told him to post a picture of his own breakfast tomorrow. It’s not exactly the grassy knoll is it ? 

Wars have broken out over far less.

[Bruce Spanner]

7 minutes ago, Colonel Kurtz said:

I think you are mixing your metaphors into some of cooked breakfast liquidiser. My grassy knoll is a metaphor for spurious conspiracy theories, not a hill to die on. Is a knoll a hill anyway ? You should have paid more attention in geography lessons. 

 

Like this post if you’re a massive dribbled chined cunt.

 

 

[Evelyn Tentions]

4 hours ago, mgw100 said:

£12 would be criminal

12p would be criminal.

The sausage labeled "made from pork and all natural ingredients....."

The natural ingredients being vomit and baby shit.