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What constitutes the perfect cooked breakfast?


ISeeRed
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Beans with a full English?  

229 members have voted

  1. 1. Beans with a full English?

    • Aye, bean me up, Scotty.
      124
    • Nay, poke your beans up your bum, one at a time.
      73


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Thats a heroic effort from Fuge, he expected it to be bad but braved it anyway. When it arrived it was worse than expected. Noble suffering for this forum's art.

 

10/10 for bravery.

 

1/10 for the breakfast, it's still better than Lifey's effort. It may be shit but at least it wouldn't break your teeth as you eat it.

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The only good thing I can say about it is that it was still pretty warm.

 

Only ordered it because I’ve took a day off to hang some lining paper in the living room and thought I would save time but I should not have fucking bothered. I can’t wallpaper for shit. The walls look like I’ve pasted bubble wrap to them. Fucking bubbles everywhere.

 

I’ve given up and bought a pack of these instead.

image.jpg

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1 minute ago, Fugitive said:

The only good thing I can say about it is that it was still pretty warm.

 

Only ordered it because I’ve took a day off to hang some lining paper in the living room and thought I would save time but I should not have fucking bothered. I can’t wallpaper for shit. The walls look like I’ve pasted bubble wrap to them. Fucking bubbles everywhere.

 

I’ve given up and bought a pack of these instead.

image.jpg

I'm just glad you are still alive 

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3 minutes ago, Fugitive said:

I didn’t eat it. I may have tried a bit but the entire thing was infected with bean juice so it went in the bin.

Seriously what were you thinking hahaha. And you must have known it would have beans on it when it turned up. 

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2 minutes ago, Bjornebye said:

Seriously what were you thinking hahaha. And you must have known it would have beans on it when it turned up. 

They usually put beans in a handy little tub that can be binned but these fuckers put a layer of beans in the box and then dumped everything else on top.

 

i nearly dialled 999 when I opened it. 

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I’m having a bad week. I was supposed to be away this weekend in a lodge with her and her family in Flookburgh but I now have to work Sunday due to another manager being a cunt and needing an operation, my fry up looked like genocide, my wallpapering attempt was a shambles, the dog won’t stop barking and the sky won’t work because of the weather.

 

Shite.

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5 hours ago, Fugitive said:

Fucking hell. It’s a fucking disaster from top to bottom.

 

One cheap anorexic link sausage that they sliced in half to make it look as if I got two.

Fatty undercooked shit bacon from a pig with aids.

Limp mushrooms.

overcooked eggs.

Cheap Black Pudding.

Shit looking Haggis.

 

That was bad enough but the lot of it was floating on a sea on fucking beans that looked like they had fallen out of somebody’s arse.

 

-75/10

 

straight in the bin.

30303553-63A2-4243-88A2-97CD40F92268.jpeg

 

Playing catch up here. Was going to post 'Kill it! Kill it with fire!' but whoever put that together has already done that. My commiserations on the loss of your money.

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1 minute ago, TheHowieLama said:

Get the wall paper attempt over to the I Am Man thread.

 

 

Wait ---- wallpaper...never mind

I don’t deserve to open that thread after the mess I’ve made. She is going to be delighted when she gets back. I’m gonna have to pay a real man to sort it out.

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8 hours ago, Fugitive said:

Fucking hell. It’s a fucking disaster from top to bottom.

 

One cheap anorexic link sausage that they sliced in half to make it look as if I got two.

Fatty undercooked shit bacon from a pig with aids.

Limp mushrooms.

overcooked eggs.

Cheap Black Pudding.

Shit looking Haggis.

 

That was bad enough but the lot of it was floating on a sea on fucking beans that looked like they had fallen out of somebody’s arse.

 

-75/10

 

straight in the bin.

30303553-63A2-4243-88A2-97CD40F92268.jpeg

How pissed were you when it seemed like a good idea to make this particular order? (5 day binge on the crack cocaine/ketamine/spice cocktail) not withstanding?

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