What constitutes the perfect cooked breakfast?

[Anubis]

18 hours ago, KMD7 said:

I'm a bit disappointed with myself now, looking back on that.  Didnt think I was that type of poster. 

Don't be so conciliatory. Just tell him to fuck off, you're keeping it, and there's nothing he can do about it. Finish with a proper supervillain laugh.

[Tony Moanero]

50 minutes ago, Anny Road said:

Went off-piste this morning managed to buy bacon and sausages but forgot beans and bread. The 2 most important ingredients, after sausages and bacon.

Was torn between repping for no beans and negging for no tomatoes. Is that a rolled up sock on the left of the plate?

[Anny Road]

4 minutes ago, Tony Moanero said:

Was torn between replying for no beans and negging for no tomatoes.

No beans now and again is ok. Not a hanging offence.

Tomatoes on you breakfast? You may as well hang one of those multi coloured flags out of your window displaying your gayness.

come on TM post a pick of your breakfast.

[Numero Veinticinco]

Miles away from being your best breakfast. No toast. No beans. Shit eggs.  Sausages look a bit crappy, cooked in places. 

6/10

[Tony Moanero]

15 minutes ago, Anny Road said:

No beans now and again is ok. Not a hanging offence.

Tomatoes on you breakfast? You may as well hang one of those multi coloured flags out of your window displaying your gayness.

come on TM post a pick of your breakfast.

Fried tomatoes are lovely. Haven’t had a full cooked brekkie in ages, probably more than a year.

[Bjornebye]

3 hours ago, Anny Road said:

Went off-piste this morning managed to buy bacon and sausages but forgot beans and bread. The 2 most important ingredients, after sausages and bacon.

Sausages undercooked, mushrooms look edible, Is that a square uncooked crumpet?, Too much hash brown, Bacon looks ok (I'm assuming it is smoked, No need to have a Guinness shit on your brekkie before you eat it, A mouse has been nibbling at the plate, Wipe your side down. 

 

No beans.

 

11/10. 

[SammyAftershave]

Undercooked sausages, incinerated eggs? Off-piste you say? Cyril Smith says while it appeals to him it's far too noncey (even from the grave with a little boy sitting on it). Give yourself a well deserved back heel in the balls. Have you ever considered becoming a Liberal Democrat MP?

[TheBitch]

Anny you've let yourself down there, those eggs are an abomination. Fair play for posting though knowing you gone done fucked it.

[ZonkoVille77]

Eggs cooked under your armpits. 

[Elite]

It's a shame to see a star fall from grace. Anny once posted the best breakfast ever to appear on this thread and yet only a few months later he posts that load of shite.

Poor cunt needs an intervention.

[Captain Turdseye]

He’s back on the ale. 

[Remmie]

11 hours ago, Anny Road said:

Went off-piste this morning managed to buy bacon and sausages but forgot beans and bread. The 2 most important ingredients, after sausages and bacon.

Anny proving don't need to have beans to have pro-bean behaviour but he is a pro-beaner.

[mattyq]

Beaners are born not manufactured

[lifetime fan]

20 hours ago, Bjornebye said:

Sausages undercooked, mushrooms look edible, Is that a square uncooked crumpet?, Too much hash brown, Bacon looks ok (I'm assuming it is smoked, No need to have a Guinness shit on your brekkie before you eat it, A mouse has been nibbling at the plate, Wipe your side down. 

 

No beans.

 

11/10. 

 

It's worse than that. It's a bread 'thin' tarts eat because they can't lose weight if they eat bread.

Shocking behaviour.

[mattyq]

I've got some cracking sausages but I thought I'd make toad in the hole later on in the week so missed them out

Normally I'd do a load of mushies but forgot to buy them the other day and couldn't be arsed to go back down to the shops.

Black pud was Stornoway, crisp on the outside fluffy inside. 3 rashers of streaky and 1 of back, all smoked, of course

Bread fried and both eggs with soft runny yolks one over easy. HP, lots of

Pot of tea and a tall glass of juice... everything bought from local butchers, £10 for 2 large breakfasts

[moof]

It’s a tough audience, the tlw crowd. All I can say is, Godspeed and fair winds. 

[Tony Moanero]

20 minutes ago, mattyq said:

I've got some cracking sausages but I thought I'd make toad in the hole later on in the week so missed them out

Normally I'd do a load of mushies but forgot to buy them the other day and couldn't be arsed to go back down to the shops.

Black pud was Stornoway, crisp on the outside fluffy inside. 3 rashers of streaky and 1 of back, all smoked, of course

Bread fried and both eggs with soft runny yolks one over easy. HP, lots of

Pot of tea and a tall glass of juice... everything bought from local butchers, £10 for 2 large breakfasts

That’s a large breakfast?! Do you have the appetite of an ant?

The bloody state of it. Fried wholemeal bread looks/sounds turd. Cherry tomatoes are for salads. Your streaky bacon looks like a dog chew. If I were you, I wouldn’t bother making the toad in the hole.

 

 

[Barrington Womble]

Steaky bacon is some bad hipster shite. 

[Numero Veinticinco]

Hahahahahahahahahahaha.

Fuck you.

[Guest]

38 minutes ago, Barry Wom said:

Steaky bacon is some bad hipster shite. 

That sounds nice, although a bit weird.

[Carvalho Diablo]

Nurse, there's an epidemic of the AIDS. 

[Numero Veinticinco]

I’d sooner have the breakfast shoved up my arse. Including the plate. And the teapot.

[Captain Turdseye]

I’d eat that, Matty. There’s been much worse posted on here. 

[Oh Buoy]

1 hour ago, mattyq said:

I've got some cracking sausages but I thought I'd make toad in the hole later on in the week so missed them out

Normally I'd do a load of mushies but forgot to buy them the other day and couldn't be arsed to go back down to the shops.

Black pud was Stornoway, crisp on the outside fluffy inside. 3 rashers of streaky and 1 of back, all smoked, of course

Bread fried and both eggs with soft runny yolks one over easy. HP, lots of

Pot of tea and a tall glass of juice... everything bought from local butchers, £10 for 2 large breakfasts

Eggs are a joke. Cherry toms are great, bonus point for having 4 of the lovely fuckers, bacon can fuck right off, as can the weirdly cut black puddling. Toast is shitely done. Blue plates are for bitter cunts and gobshites who can't make breakfasts. 

 

4/10. 

[HatTrickRick]

It's, umm... different