MICHAEL OWEN BROCHURE

[Redexile]

I can't help but like him...

 

Here's my brochure:

 

I'm with you on that

[Antynwa]

'Come on out Owen lad, you're about to get debated to death again'

[Section_31]

For someone who always seemed so sharp in the head, and with a close family around him, he's made seome truly spectacular fuck ups in his time. This is almost Gordon Brown-esque.

[DJLJ]

I know he's not everybody's favorite ex-player, but please do keep in mind that it's not Owen himself that has compiled this glossy pile of marketing wank-speak. He has an organization managing his affairs, this is the kind of thing that those kinds of organizations do.

 

It's a little sad, and a far from fitting twilight for a player who, in his prime, was one of the most lethal that I have ever seen play for us (and nice article, Woo, made me very nostalgic). Of greater concern is that fact that there is clearly a market for this kind of garbage - this is the language of modern football. That is truly depressing.

 

Lets not forget that he is the one that has the final say in the matter though. He would have been consulted on the brochure and would have said yes or no to whether to send it out. Its not like they've done this without him knowing.

[Section_31]

Brand values

 

[Antynwa]

For someone who always seemed so sharp in the head, and with a close family around him, he's made seome truly spectacular fuck ups in his time. This is almost Gordon Brown-esque.

 

This is the thing with Michael, and why I really can't understand the anger. Yes he fucked us over, but look what has happened to him.

 

Leaving us for Real Madrid seemed like a really good fucking idea at the time, we where playing as if we had shit on our shoes, Gerrard was changing his mind more than women on whether he wanted to go or not and even though we had a new manager. You don't say no to Real Madrid, especially when the team you play for only scraped into the CL the season previous. The simple fact is, we came off better than Owen, he knows it, we know it and the whole footballing world knows it. I don't feel it's right to mock him because he's still an extraordinary talent and despite what that brochure may say about Owen, he's a model professional and an excellent role model, he doesn't deserve to be treated with such disdain from our fans.

 

Maybe it's because he is my 'definitive' footballing hero as a child, his FA Cup Final was my first FA Cup Final, I was at his first game when he scored on his debut, I also remember very well him scoring v Argentina.

 

As I said, he still has the talent, the ability and the brain to play at the highest level, not week in week out, but enough to satisfy our needs. I hope we are in for him, if he says yes, great. If he doesn't, so what we will always be better off without Michael Owen, and we will also be better off with him.

 

It's a win-win situation for me. Michael Owen on a free? I'd carry the prick here naked and sing Will Young songs to him whilst I do it.

[chris71]

"Clean and fresh" What the fuck is that all about. Did some marketing genius think the top clubs would come flying in for him because he can use soap and water?

[Trumo]

For someone who always seemed so sharp in the head, and with a close family around him, he's made seome truly spectacular fuck ups in his time. This is almost Gordon Brown-esque.

 

Have to say that's true. Because his England place was so important to him, he put almost everything else into the background. At the very moment he needed to be a regular first-teamer, he jumped ship to Madrid where he was behind Raul and Ronaldo in the pecking order. Having realised his World Cup place could be affected, he decided to come back to the Premier League, to Newcastle, where he would be a regular.

 

Yes he has been unlucky with injuries, but it's England that motivates him rather than his club (or trophies), so his actions are all about getting into the England set-up, even if it's counter productive for his club. Now that he has been all but excluded by Capello, he needs to rethink his priorities.

 

He still wants to command a high salary, but his recent record means there are no takers willing to pay him as such. Hence the brochure.

 

He could end up moving to the MLS as a designated player, much like Beckham, but without the media overkill. He still has the ability to do a job in the Premier League, but it would be with a middle-ranking club like Fulham or Wigan.

 

In September 2001 it all looked so different.

 

[Section_31]

I asked you to design a marketing brochure for Michael Owen. Look what you brought me, "young". Hannah Montanna is bloody young, Michale Owen's 29 for crying out loud!

 

And look, what's this? "Fit and healthy!" You must be having a laugh! When I was starting out in Bizniz, I didn't get anywhere by being a Billy Bullshitter. You're fired!

 

Thank you Sir Alan

 

[el nino laff]

It's very sad to see Micheal like this he was awesome with us and i'll always like him for what he done for us..

I remember checking the scores of the match and just wondering when he would score not if!

Being a younger red he was one of my first Liverpool heroes..

I'd have him back

[Anubis]

That brochure is cringeworthy. I can't believe anyone at his agency actually thought this would be a good idea, or that he signed off on it being sent out. Surely at least one person must have realised it'd be leaked and that it would have the piss ripped out of it?

[goatboy59]

Have him back as what? A regular starter? No chance, for numerous reasons.

 

Occasional rest days for Torres? Maybe, but if he did manage to 'do a job' and score a few, what happens when he's back on the bench?

 

Don't forget it's a World Cup year, and the press bullshit we'd have to contend with if Rafa was 'scuppering England's chances' would be severe. I wouldn't put it past the rat to start spreading dressing room gossip to the likes of Maddock for his own agenda.

 

Michael Owen is only interested in England and Michael Owen. We're well out of it.

[Guido]

"50% of Michael Owen is on the left side of his body."

 

Well, it doesn't actually say that but it's the kind of toss this little pink pomphlet is littered with. Can't believe they try to compare him with Torres by noting that they've played the same percentage of games for their clubs over the past 2 years! Yep, but 23 goals isn't quite the same as 50.

 

Fannywank.

[BatChainPuller]

'Fit and Healthy' :|

[paddyberger15]

'Fit and Healthy' :|

 

It means he has no current STD's.

[Antynwa]

That brochure is cringeworthy. I can't believe anyone at his agency actually thought this would be a good idea, or that he signed off on it being sent out. Surely at least one person must have realised it'd be leaked and that it would have the piss ripped out of it?

 

 

I just feel tremendous sadness of how a childhood hero could have to resort to such levels.

[Strontium]

I'm sick of Michael Owen in just about every conceivable way. I can't wait til he retires and these shitty threads about whether or not he screwed us over can be fucked off forever.

[Section_31]

I'm sick of Michael Owen in just about every conceivable way. I can't wait til he retires and these shitty threads about whether or not he screwed us over can be fucked off forever.

 

I feel the same about Beckham. He hasn't been a good footballer since before the Iraq war yet he's still fucking everywhere. Will he won't he come back to England, stay in Milan, go back to LA, captain England again? what's he endorsing this week? Fuck off, who cares.

[havarantagain]

I think this is more off pitch than on which pitch he wants to profit from. A final push to max his marketing value and indirectly attract the likes off Everton and Villa to pay him a weekly wage and share in his fading off pitch credibility. Twat.

[Hermes]

 

"Articulate", that's absolutely hilarious. The man can't put two words together.

[sm9]

This is my favourite quote from the brochure:

 

Michael Owen has played for 3 of the most famous club teams in World football; Liverpool, Real Madrid and Newcastle United.

 

Can anyone spot the odd one out there?! :-)

[GRADY]

Owen should never have left for Madrid but to be fair to him he had always said he would like to play abroad at some point.

 

For me the main fuck up was when real madrid accepted newcastles offer and Owen never stood his ground and said he would only go to Liverpool. What a fuck up that was.

 

However the anti owen shit is a bit fuckin sad. He fucked up and he has probably regretted it every day since but owen was a shining light in a couple of very poor liverpool teams prior to gerrards arrival and people forget that.

 

Id take him as back up but as earlier mentioned he will want to be playing regularly and its no going to happen at liverpool

[Mr Piechnik]

Stolen from a poster on another board.....Joey Barton has just released his own brochure....

 

[Stu Monty]

As slick as that brochure might be I have a little tweak that I reckon they should have made. Maybe, just maybe, if you're putting together a brochure about Michael Owen, you don't refer to two recent "Injury scarred seasons". That's some horrible language fuck up they've let pass there. Scarred? Are you serious?

 

*Takes marketing head off and walks away*

[stevescouse]

Its not the fact he left us it was the way he done it, If Michael would have came back from portugal and said Liverpool can not match my ambitions I wouls like to go abroad a lot of fans me included would have said thanks Michael good luck.

A big deal like that is not done overnight it must have been getting discussed over a period of weeks, Michael kept on saying liverpool is for me, Kids were going out buying owen tops! then in the week of the start of the season he leaves.

John barnes when he signed in the 80's stated if a top italian club came in for him he would go! That was honesty! thats all michale had to say!