Schoolyard Fights

[Sugar Ape]

Did anyone used to have a wall of death whereby about 6 lads would put their hands against a wall and stand back and you'd have to run between the wall and their bodies whilst they kneed and kicked the shit out of you?

 

There was also one called Waterfalls which was the same but you'd get spat on when you ran through.

 

Proper middle class me when I was growing up.

[Lee909]

I bet you were like Pit the younger

[Stu Monty]

Did anyone used to have a wall of death whereby about 6 lads would put their hands against a wall and stand back and you'd have to run between the wall and their bodies whilst they kneed and kicked the shit out of you?

 

There was also one called Waterfalls which was the same but you'd get spat on when you ran through.

 

Proper middle class me when I was growing up.

 

That was called The Milk Machine when I was at school.

[Sugar Ape]

That was called The Milk Machine when I was at school.

What part of their body were they using to spit at you?

[Joe Le Taxi]

Never had a fight myself, I was a lover not a fighter but I remember there was this small jumped up chav cunt who always hung around the big lads like flies on shit and gave it the bigg'un. One day he was ripping into this kid in PE who wasn't timid but never really showed aggression  expecting his mates to bail him out. 

 

The guy proceeded to throw a cricket bat in his face followed by a devil of a right hook that split his nose everywhere. It was beautiful. No one took him seriously after that

[Dr Nowt]

Did anyone used to have a wall of death whereby about 6 lads would put their hands against a wall and stand back and you'd have to run between the wall and their bodies whilst they kneed and kicked the shit out of you?

Similar, was generally unofficially the length of the main corridor and a number of the eldest year would hang about ready to dish out punishment. It was called pinball. We got it in our first year, by the last year we were the ones dishing it out.

 

When my brother was at the school years before me a lad we knew when we were younger had it done to him, but he fought back, putting one of the lads attacking him's head through a classroom window; blood everywhere.

 

It's a big gypsy area and he needed a police escort to and from school for months. There were scenes outside the place for a week or so, with older distant family members indiscriminately hitting kids with bats and sticks. One lad who was totally unrelated to the original incident actually did end up having his eye out.

 

Didn't do the spitting shit though. Scapegraces the lot of you!

[Sugar Ape]

[YorkshireRed]

Despite being basically a soft cunt and not interested in fighting I had two playground fights and won them both.

 

I believe my undefeated record puts me up there with the likes of Rocky Marciano and Floyd Mayweather. 
 

Don’t mess with me. 

[Bjornebye]

On 02/04/2014 at 16:22, Boss said:

Some lad that was massively into warcraft and dungeons and dragons ended up putting some little asian kid on a coat hanger after an argument in P.E. Literally just picked him up by his jumper and stuck him on the coat hanger... his little legs were thrashing around furiously trying to get down screaming "let me down an i'll fuckin twat the lot of ya". You know when you laugh so much you can't even breath? that's what it was like.

 

The funny back story to it was this asian lad had only been in the school about two weeks and was giving it the billy big bollocks routine about how hard he was. He saw the other kid as an easy target for his abuse and ended up being served the ultimate slice of humble pie.

“Let me down and I’ll fucking twat the lot of ya” hahahahaha 

[Bjornebye]

On 30/03/2014 at 02:09, Alan Sex said:

It's on. Rumble with RAWK.

 

Let's go get 'em boys.

 

A Cockwork Orange 

[Paulie Dangerously]

On 25/04/2014 at 16:41, Sugar Ape said:

Did anyone used to have a wall of death whereby about 6 lads would put their hands against a wall and stand back and you'd have to run between the wall and their bodies whilst they kneed and kicked the shit out of you?

 

There was also one called Waterfalls which was the same but you'd get spat on when you ran through.

 

Proper middle class me when I was growing up.

We had that. It was an alternative to Red Arse if you were in. Everyone chose the wall of death even though only 1/10 red arse shots actually connected. 

 

We didn't do the waterfall but we had the golly pit in which children would spit and throw coins down and hope someone would go and get them. 

[John102]

Had a few fights, nothing out the ordinary. 

 

One lad in primary school was considered quite hard, even though he had never won a fight looking back. When he got hit, he used to hulk up like the hulkster for about 10 seconds and then just scream in the direction of his opponent. In primary school this was considered quite intimidating, so when a kid hit him and he started his routine, the other kid would bail leaving him the winner. One time we were at the shops and bumped into some random who started giving him shit. Anyway, the lad hit him so my mate started his routine. This other lad was a bit rough though and didn't seem to run. In our little brains we thought that this lad was toast and we looked forward to seeing what our mate was going to do. After about 5 seconds of hulking up, the lad was just stood there looking confused. In the end, my mate went full hulk, screamed in his face and then just turned around and bailed. As the lad stood there confused, we let him know just how close he had come to a beating and that he should count himself lucky he could live to tell the tail. The lad just trudged off wondering what the fuck he had just been involved in. Obviously when we caught up with our mate later, he said he'd had to run off as the red must had descended and he was scared of killing the lad. We thought the explanation plausible and spoke no more about it. 

 

We used to have random fights over the most bizarre shit. I remember having a fight with one of my mates as someone had told me that he said my mums gravy was shit. I filled him in but felt hollow after it. He hadn't actually commented on the gravy. 

[Stickman]

On 25/04/2014 at 16:41, Sugar Ape said:

Did anyone used to have a wall of death whereby about 6 lads would put their hands against a wall and stand back and you'd have to run between the wall and their bodies whilst they kneed and kicked the shit out of you?

 

There was also one called Waterfalls which was the same but you'd get spat on when you ran through.

 

Proper middle class me when I was growing up.

Christ that brings back some memories although we called it the tunnel of death ...And some cunt at the end of the tunnel would always close it off with their knees so you couldn’t get out 

 

[Bjornebye]

3 hours ago, John102 said:

Had a few fights, nothing out the ordinary. 

 

One lad in primary school was considered quite hard, even though he had never won a fight looking back. When he got hit, he used to hulk up like the hulkster for about 10 seconds and then just scream in the direction of his opponent. In primary school this was considered quite intimidating, so when a kid hit him and he started his routine, the other kid would bail leaving him the winner. One time we were at the shops and bumped into some random who started giving him shit. Anyway, the lad hit him so my mate started his routine. This other lad was a bit rough though and didn't seem to run. In our little brains we thought that this lad was toast and we looked forward to seeing what our mate was going to do. After about 5 seconds of hulking up, the lad was just stood there looking confused. In the end, my mate went full hulk, screamed in his face and then just turned around and bailed. As the lad stood there confused, we let him know just how close he had come to a beating and that he should count himself lucky he could live to tell the tail. The lad just trudged off wondering what the fuck he had just been involved in. Obviously when we caught up with our mate later, he said he'd had to run off as the red must had descended and he was scared of killing the lad. We thought the explanation plausible and spoke no more about it. 

 

We used to have random fights over the most bizarre shit. I remember having a fight with one of my mates as someone had told me that he said my mums gravy was shit. I filled him in but felt hollow after it. He hadn't actually commented on the gravy. 

Hahahahahahhaaaaaaaaaa primary school violence summed up in a post. Pissing myself here. "He said my mums gravy was shit" hahahaha thats about as bad as it gets when your about 10 years old for wanting to do someone in good & proper. 

2 hours ago, Stickman said:

Christ that brings back some memories although we called it the tunnel of death ...And some cunt at the end of the tunnel would always close it off with their knees so you couldn’t get out 

 

Yeah we called it tunnel of death. 

 

We use to have bare arse in heads and volleys (I think it was concede 10 you get bare arse) then after 20 it was raw bollocks. 

[Alan Sex]

On 26/09/2020 at 01:41, Bjornebye said:

A Cockwork Orange 

Cum on lads!!

[Bjornebye]

9 minutes ago, Colonel Kurtz said:

Douglas Mckivor, thick Scottish cunt in a fight over Janet Mcabe who we were both shagging. I was about 17. Pleased to report I battered the cunt though he started it. Nearly 40 years have passed but sure if we bumped into each other in the street it would kick off again. Not thrown a punch since. Last I heard. Janet was lecturing in radical feminist film studies so doubt she's shag either of us now. 

Did he wear a kilt? Fuck me thats the most scottish name ever 

[ZonkoVille77]

31 minutes ago, Colonel Kurtz said:

Douglas Mckivor, thick Scottish cunt in a fight over Janet Mcabe who we were both shagging. I was about 17. Pleased to report I battered the cunt though he started it. Nearly 40 years have passed but sure if we bumped into each other in the street it would kick off again. Not thrown a punch since. Last I heard. Janet was lecturing in radical feminist film studies so doubt she's shag either of us now. 

 

"Feminist"

[Elite]

My first fight was a mindless act of violence from some kid that had no reason to attack me. I remember him saying "I've got something to show you" as he had his arm behind his back, so I just expected it to be something fun. As I looked down, he swung his arm around and chinned me. I got a few digs back and we ended up playing football later. Still remember it, in fact anytime my girlfriend says she's got something special to show me, I always get in the first punch to be in the safe side.

[Bjornebye]

3 minutes ago, Elite said:

My first fight was a mindless act of violence from some kid that had no reason to attack me. I remember him saying "I've got something to show you" as he had his arm behind his back, so I just expected it to be something fun. As I looked down, he swung his arm around and chinned me. I got a few digs back and we ended up playing football later. Still remember it, in fact anytime my girlfriend says she's got something special to show me, I always get in the first punch to be in the safe side.

Hahahaha "smell the cheese" 

[Bjornebye]

3 minutes ago, Colonel Kurtz said:

He was a little squat kid, no friends, thick as fuck, could barely speak. 

haha again it starts to unravel..... This sounds a lot like bullying to me.... 

 

Janet McCabe must have been a right looker 

[Dr Nowt]

10 minutes ago, Bjornebye said:

haha again it starts to unravel..... This sounds a lot like bullying to me.... 

 

Janet McCabe must have been a right looker 

By tomorrow it'll turn out this was in January, Janet McCabe gets dropped off and picked up from school by the police every day and her Dad is preparing himself for 20 years in Belmarsh once he's got Kurtz's address.

[Toxteth O'Grady]

On 30/03/2014 at 02:09, Alan Sex said:

It's on. Rumble with RAWK.

 

Let's go get 'em boys.

 

fucking Prod cunts, get more ridiculous every July.

[Bjornebye]

20 minutes ago, Dr Nowt said:

By tomorrow it'll turn out this was in January, Janet McCabe gets dropped off and picked up from school by the police every day and her Dad is preparing himself for 20 years in Belmarsh once he's got Kurtz's address.

Yep and Douglas Mckivor is the lollipop man who shopped him to the police and isn't even scottish 

[Captain Howdy]

Only ever punched one person in my entire life but by Christ it was a beauty. Darren Armstrong his name was. We were about 12 and had an argument about something I can’t remember, he was a bit of a bully was Darren and he started pushing me against some privots, I just threw my right hand at him and it smacked him right in the sweet spot on the side of his jaw, he went down like a sack of shite. I remember running home crying my eyes out thinking the police were coming for me. Lesson here is don’t fuck with “one punch Howdy”

[Toxteth O'Grady]

3 minutes ago, Captain Howdy said:

Only ever punched one person in my entire life but by Christ it was a beauty. Darren Armstrong his name was. We were about 12 and had an argument about something I can’t remember, he was a bit of a bully was Darren and he started pushing me against some privots, I just threw my right hand at him and it smacked him right in the sweet spot on the side of his jaw, he went down like a sack of shite. I remember running home crying my eyes out thinking the police were coming for me. Lesson here is don’t fuck with “one punch Howdy”

Phone rings

"hello?"

Angelo Dundee "is that yourself Howdy? We want you to turn pro"