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Guest simon

I'm fucking furious feel like going out on a killing spree(AKA A boy and his dog)

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Simon's dog was never kidnapped he left home to start a rigerous training regime for...........................

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

_41172724_dog.jpg

 

The Marathon !

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thread of the year.

 

gets my vote, without a doubt.

 

i only engage simon on matters concerning animals (poisonous reptiles, monkeys and lost pets), and this certainly was the ultimate thread.

 

simon definitely needs a cat.

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gets my vote, without a doubt.

 

i only engage simon on matters concerning animals (poisonous reptiles, monkeys and lost pets), and this certainly was the ultimate thread.

 

simon definitely needs a cat.

 

Also parrot cages.

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thread of the year.

 

 

Was the original cheques/pikeys/tarmac thread in 2008? If so, this one is 2009's winner in every sense.

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Guest Pistonbroke

I've just spent an hour of my new years eve reading this thread. Pissing myself more than a drunken tramp on a German bus.

 

I'm going to print it off page by page pictures and all and sell it on e bay. I shall give Simon 5% of all profits so he can buy a new pooch and take out a contract on the dognappers. Or he can use the money to pay off his debts or replace the magic mushrooms he used for his dads omelette.

 

In fact i think you will agree that the following scenario could actually be the truth in some other dimension.

 

Simon has actually died but doesn't know it. He taught his pooch all she needed to know about parallel universes and death. But she is now confused and thinks that she is indeed Simon and posts on here to pay for her dogging addiction which caused a hefty debt with the Gypo's.

 

 

Thanks for the laughs Simon and all those who contributed. Apart from the serious posts, Jesus, chill out.

 

Off to find the debt thread now.

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This thread put paid to my plans on going to town, well, well worth it though. I tried repping most people who posted on here but I've been repping you fuckers too much of late, so have a spiritual rep.

 

Definitely the thread of the year.

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On 25/02/2009 at 17:35, Stu Monty said:

 

Without knowing a shitload more about what's actually gone on then I wouldn't be offering up any concrete advice at all.

or tarmac advice come to think of it

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On 25/02/2009 at 19:48, She Knows It said:

How on earth did they know the dog was on the blob this week? Didn't you notice them following you round when you took the dog out for a walk, holding a 'First Response Easy-Read One-Step Ovulation Predictor' stick underneath her for a mid-stream sample every time she squatted for a piss?

Some people would pay good money for a gang of blokes to come round and cart the missus off every time she had the painters in.

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On 04/03/2009 at 22:42, dennis tooth said:

I'd get it myself if he knew where it was and it was within my means but he has lost it without a trace it seems. The only thing he can do is report it to the RSPCA and see what they do, if they are not too busy euthanising everything and making money that is.

Can't you have a word with Liz?  No, not the one from here, the other queen.

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Can't believe I've never read this before.

 

Funnily enough my mate had his dog nicked by travellers, he's a farmer and they tend to have dogs for hunting which the travellers like.

 

He drove onto their camp and nicked it back,  nobody challenged him.

 

Later that day they actually rang his home phone to say they were coming back for " their" dog.

When they showed up he had about 20 lads waiting for them so they fucked off and that was that.

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